I Called In Sick Today

[El Guapo 8]

Ron. The best thing you can do is physical therapy for as long as the insurance will pay for it. My back did amazing when I was doing it regularly. It's sorta like having a personal trainer for your back. You will lose weight and strengthen your core.Surgery should be very very far down your list. The pain you fell is because your back is flaring up, your nerve is inflamed because the bulge from your disc is pushing on your spinal nerves, causing sciatica and other back pain. Mine has been so bad before that I could not move at all and had to be carried to the bathroom. Once the swelling goes down, your back will start to feel better.I know there are some anti chiropractic sentiments in here, but it works wonders for me. Thing is you need to fine one that is not a quack and thinks they can cure all disease through chiro. Find one that is more sports oriented. There are different techniques too, I can e mail my buddy and fine out which he uses if you want to look into it. Let me know.Massage helps keep the knots at bay, and lets the muscles relax, before I moved I was going once a month, which kept me feeling pretty good. Stretching. This is my bane. I don't do it enough, and when I get a flare up, it's usually because my muscles are too tight. I really should stretch 15 minutes a day minimum, and I maybe do it once a week.Surgery may or may not fix what you have. I am waiting until they perfect the disc replacement surgery, where they put and artificial disc in place of the one that is ruptured/herniated.Here you go, this is what we both have right here:

[jeff_536 3]

Shoulder rehab is a bitch. My left shoulder dislocated three times before I went in for the surgery in 93. long, slow painful recovery. Different than rotator, but still, a real bitch.

[Tactical Bear 3]

( P.S. I do realize I have just appeared in here uninvited. I know some of you from elsewhere and I understand that I just sort of followed you home and into your living room and sat down on the couch. But rather than take the humble offer-to-leave position that Nikki did I am going to pretend to be oblivious and also start drinking the beer from your fridge. )

Nobody in here was invited. Nobody has ever been kicked out. There is nobody in charge. (Sidenote: I have often wondered who from this thread would be each character from various movies, including, most often: The Godfather. If anybody has any input, please share.) I have no idea how I started posting here, but I'm almost positive there was no invitation. In fact, the circumstances were probably similar to the ones under which you started posting, except I was already drunk, and I started urinating off the porch a few times a day.

I think the joke's on wang.

I was unhappy to see this posted, as I had already planned on saying it myself.

in the spirit of that, I just watched Ghost Town with Ricky Gervais. It was cute, I liked it.

A few days ago, I watched Bounce, Practical Magic, and Just Friends. I feel less guilt about this than I used to.

Way to make things real awkward with the ladies. And I thought I was inept at dealing with the opposite sex...though in person I'd out-stumble any of you.One time I couldn't make it back to my apartment from a party (that was two houses down the street from my place), so I dropped a few cosby kids off behind a back tire of my nemesis' car.

I can think of no way to prove it, but I like to believe I would win in an awk-off. I have never heard the bolded phrase, and I love it.

schools will eventually force students to use turnitin to submit all written assignments, I think. that shit googles every bit of the paper and pounds a bunch of databases as well. one of my classes at KU was an early trial of that software. the TA ended up nailing like five people in my section alone. ****ing love seeing people light $10,000+ on fire trying to cheat.of course, people like SB will be the ultimate fag-all for any anti-plagiarism system. what a writer that woman is, and to think that she shifted over to the dark side for a while...

Accusations of plagarism are soooo easy to avoid. Even if you're blatantly ripping someone off, just cite the source and you can't get in any real trouble. I have written scores of term papers for people. I have never worried about getting caught. Southern Buddhist impresses the shit out of me. She seems really talented.

Yeah, we'll see how that goes. I've already lived with her for a month (I just moved out), which is a pretty big plus. I already know that having her around constantly is actually a positive thing, and this is the first time I've thought that about a girl in about 3 years. I'm not about to send her on a poem-laden scavenger hunt, but we'll see what happens.

Good luck. I am sad that you have been holding out on us. She must have seen your penis recently, and that is the kind of information I insist you share.

she was pregnant three months after leaving meI was destroyed for about three yearsit'll be six years this september

I am sympathetic. I have always imagined you as a c'est la vie kind of guy, not one who would stay in the dumps for 3 years. I am overcome with the urge to hug you. That urge makes me uncomfortable

I already have a hat.

Is that actually you or a person you know? If so, where can I get that fucking hat? I thought I had more to say, but I started writing this like an hour ago, then went and did something else, and have since forgotten

[Dawson Leery 12]

apparently it's JBrad's b-day today. Happy Birthday homo

Thanks but where are my noodz?

Happy B-Day J-Brad!

Thanks. Spent 14/24 hours of my birthday at the office today = not fun. Was supposed to go to dinner with GIL and had to cancel again, she's starting to get pissed about how much I work.Also, not sure if I told this story or not..but 2 weekends ago I went over to GIL's house at like 4, get in bed then immediately run to the bathroom, throw up for like 10 minutes then leave. While waiting for a cab I passed out on her steps. O/U on how much longer this lasts: 18 days. Place your bets ladies and gentlemen.

[strategy's_touch 0]

the take-home point from the convos I've had with my brother is that surgery should be last on your list of stuff to try. I mean, I just thought it was funny to hear a surgeon saying that. he does have some pretty awesome stories about the soldiers he's treated, I gotta say. dudes getting injured in Japan attempting to disarm newly-unearthed WWII-era mortar shells, etc.

[Bizzle 0]

Any word on Pete in the ME? Last post saw was the ugly KK/AA hand

Waiting for day 2 on Tuesday, I have 14725.

[vbnautilus 48]

I love those kinds of cop stories. heard about some developer getting pulled over for speeding a block outside of Lansing city limits by a Lansing cop. he told the cop to call in a colleague from Leavenworth to issue the ticket or expect to lose in court.

I have interacted with the LAPD local paramilitary force exactly twice and both times have resulted in crazy stories. Here is the first. This story I love because it shows 1) how completely ineffectual the police are and 2) what real justice looks like. When I was living in that place previously pictured on the boardwalk, the downstairs of my building had a small shop. The shop was run by this big musclehead tattooed guy who had just been released from prison the previous month. He was selling shirts with marijuana-related phrases on them. (He was also selling marijuana. And coke. I had wondered whether the landlord knew what was going on until the thug told me he was supplying the landlord with coke). This guy was always really nice to me and I got the feeling he would have been a kind person had his life circumstances were different -- and he probably was a good guy to those close to him, but you just knew if you ever go on his bad side he was capable of some pretty dark shit. One night my roommates and I hear this crashing sound down below. I look over the balcony and these two young punks are kicking on the door to closed store. I yell down and they explain that they "left their cell phone inside and need it". I tell them that I'm sure the owner will be happy to return it, and if they leave their name and phone number with me I'll be sure he gets the message. They write down their names and phone numbers on a small slip of paper. About an hour later, there is another crash. They couldn't wait for whatever they needed and busted down the door to the store. So, I call the police and tell them what happened. An hour goes by, they don't come. I call again. They still don't come. Eventually I stop a random patrol car coming down the boardwalk. I explain the situation, that the store has been broken into (look, there it is), and that I have the names and phone numbers of the guys who did it. My jaw dropped at their response: "What do you want us to do about it?"You know I'm not really sure what exactly I expected them to do, but certainly they should be doing something. Can't you at least fill out a report or something? I know who did it, and now the store is open and all the merchandise is totally unprotected. police: Are you the owner? vb: No, I live upstairspolice: Well, if you saw the form, you'd understand -- we can't fill out a report unless we have the owner. vb: ...vb: are you seriously telling me the form is preventing you from enforcing the law? you're really going to just drive away with this store here all busted into? police: well, we're not gonna stay here all night and watch it. And they drove away. The next morning, I provided The Thug with the slip of paper. He called these guys up and convincingly threatened their lives. I'm pretty sure he would have actually had them killed if they didn't make reparations. Later that afternoon, I came home, and found The Thug watching with arms crossed as the two guys who broke into the store were sawing a new door for him out of planks of wood. It was perhaps the most beautiful and ironic sight i've ever witnessed.

[mclumpo 0]

I have interacted with the LAPD local paramilitary force exactly twice and both times have resulted in crazy stories. Here is the first. This story I love because it shows 1) how completely ineffectual the police are and 2) what real justice looks like. When I was living in that place previously pictured on the boardwalk, the downstairs of my building had a small shop. The shop was run by this big musclehead tattooed guy who had just been released from prison the previous month. He was selling shirts with marijuana-related phrases on them. (He was also selling marijuana. And coke. I had wondered whether the landlord knew what was going on until the thug told me he was supplying the landlord with coke). This guy was always really nice to me and I got the feeling he would have been a kind person had his life circumstances were different -- and he probably was a good guy to those close to him, but you just knew if you ever go on his bad side he was capable of some pretty dark shit. One night my roommates and I hear this crashing sound down below. I look over the balcony and these two young punks are kicking on the door to closed store. I yell down and they explain that they "left their cell phone inside and need it". I tell them that I'm sure the owner will be happy to return it, and if they leave their name and phone number with me I'll be sure he gets the message. They write down their names and phone numbers on a small slip of paper. About an hour later, there is another crash. They couldn't wait for whatever they needed and busted down the door to the store. So, I call the police and tell them what happened. An hour goes by, they don't come. I call again. They still don't come. Eventually I stop a random patrol car coming down the boardwalk. I explain the situation, that the store has been broken into (look, there it is), and that I have the names and phone numbers of the guys who did it. My jaw dropped at their response: "What do you want us to do about it?"You know I'm not really sure what exactly I expected them to do, but certainly they should be doing something. Can't you at least fill out a report or something? I know who did it, and now the store is open and all the merchandise is totally unprotected. police: Are you the owner? vb: No, I live upstairspolice: Well, if you saw the form, you'd understand -- we can't fill out a report unless we have the owner. vb: ...vb: are you seriously telling me the form is preventing you from enforcing the law? you're really going to just drive away with this store here all busted into? police: well, we're not gonna stay here all night and watch it. And they drove away. The next morning, I provided The Thug with the slip of paper. He called these guys up and convincingly threatened their lives. I'm pretty sure he would have actually had them killed if they didn't make reparations. Later that afternoon, I came home, and found The Thug watching with arms crossed as the two guys who broke into the store were sawing a new door for him out of planks of wood. It was perhaps the most beautiful and ironic sight i've ever witnessed.

Now this is a good story.Thank you.

[Poppy_Hillis 11]

I met the girl of my dreams this weekend. Unfortunately this will end up with me screwing it up, or not screwing anything up because I have no chance. I think she knows how ga-ga I am on account of me drunkenly letting it slip Saturday night, just hours after I met her, and her best friends talking to me about it tonight. This is either the best possible situation or the worst. I also found out tonight that she records original 90210 episodes every day on SOAP, which made me fall in love with her even more. I'd have pictures, but I'm trying to not be so creepy right now, from my experience that doesn't work.People that careOver .5 EVUnder .5 -120Poppy's chancesSuccess +20000Failure -40000She lives 3 hours away and has a boyfriend, although it's reported they're on the outs.

[Nikki_N 17]

I'm about to go to a specialist for my partially torn rotator cuff. I'm really just hoping for some good pills to hold me over until next summer when I can have surgery.

That's a long time to wait. Dave's had a rotator cuff injury since high school. It bugs him most of the year, when we play softball. There are exercises that are supposed to help. He bought a book online that lists them all. They are the same ones the physical therapist or orthopedist or whatever would give him (one at a time). He had to pay the doc each time. RACKET!

I almost threw up I was laughing so hard at this, good one Nikki.

It works on me. I'm easy, though, so that's not saying much.

Awesome...between this and Ron's suggestion I guess I'll see how rehab goes. I'm just pissed because I rested my shoulder for 3 months hoping that it was tendonitis that would clear up. A few football tosses and a volleyball game later and I'm right back where I started. Oh well.

Yep. Good luck with your lady friend, sir.

I already have a hat.

I love this hat! I think I can make it!

I cant really endorse it at all....You would fit right in at the Icewater household....At any given moment my shop has at least three people inside drinking awayI had the cops show up this evening.... cute gal around the age of twenty five barged in wearing a Glock"How are you all doin this evenin?""Terrible""Uh....well....we got some complaints about the fireworks from the neighbors""Really.... why did they call you city cops when were in the county?""This is in the county?""Yeah""Whats this address?"(writes down the numbers I give her on a notepad)"Well....its gettin pretty late guys""Yeah""You might wanna shut it down for the evening""Nah...if the bastards really called you guys....which I doubt....then they can watch the rest of the display while the county guys get here""You fellows have a good evening"No county cops ever surfaced....she saw the fireworks and decided to throw her weight aroundWOOT!Be a man and ask for them..... he dont care one way or the otherShane asks to be sedated at the dentist for a cleaningand is

He's got the biggest balls of them all!I get nitrous for fillings. I love nitrous.

Saddest 4th of July story I ever heard but a good reminder of how we forget sometimes how good we have it here.

That was damn depressing.

[speedz99 145]

Be a man and ask for them..... he dont care one way or the other

Most doctors aren't actually like this where I live. Unfortunately.

Matt - be sure to post a a nice pic of your ex and a bad pic of the new girl at some point and then disappear

Good times.

My step-mom said that they had two dogs as pets - a small white dog and a german shepherd before the revolution occurred.Saddest 4th of July story I ever heard but a good reminder of how we forget sometimes how good we have it here.

That's awful.

Nobody in here was invited. Nobody has ever been kicked out. There is nobody in charge. (Sidenote: I have often wondered who from this thread would be each character from various movies, including, most often: The Godfather. If anybody has any input, please share.)

I love ideas like this that never actually get followed through on now that JJJ is gone with the wind.

A few days ago, I watched Bounce, Practical Magic, and Just Friends. I feel less guilt about this than I used to.

I saw The Proposal in the theater.

I can think of no way to prove it, but I like to believe I would win in an awk-off.

You would, if only because you seem to be perfectly comfortable with being an unapologetic center of attention. I'm a little behind you in that area.

I have never heard the bolded phrase, and I love it.

The full original phrase is "drop the cosby kids off at the pool".

Is that actually you or a person you know? If so, where can I get that fucking hat?

You have to do some good google work to find it...I just looked and couldn't, but I know it's out there. No, unfortunately that's not me.

I met the girl of my dreams this weekend. Unfortunately this will end up with me screwing it up, or not screwing anything up because I have no chance. I think she knows how ga-ga I am on account of me drunkenly letting it slip Saturday night, just hours after I met her, and her best friends talking to me about it tonight. This is either the best possible situation or the worst.

I'm going to go with worst.

[brvheart 1,752]

Thrice weekly sounds pretty good to me, but I'm not all that sexual. And I'm not big on dishes or laundry, but...I'm sure there's something I do around the house.

Not according to your mom, Jewboy.

Yeah, we'll see how that goes. I've already lived with her for a month (I just moved out), which is a pretty big plus. I already know that having her around constantly is actually a positive thing, and this is the first time I've thought that about a girl in about 3 years. I'm not about to send her on a poem-laden scavenger hunt, but we'll see what happens.

You're going to date a stripper?

I'm guessing you totally understand what I'm going through right now...I'm trying to figure out how to walk the fine line between not mentioning pain meds and hoping the doctor brings it up versus just straight out asking for them.

What's wrong with you guys? Such pussies. Don't you go to the same doctor every time? If I want pain pills, I ask my doc and he says ok.

boring story and even I'm not buzzed enough to type it out. I think I told it once in this thread and told a detailed version of it in the army thread about three years ago when I was a regular there. Short version. Happily marriedshe thought the grass was greenerhappened instantly, never saw it comingshe was pregnant three months after leaving meI was destroyed for about three yearsit'll be six years this september

Um. That sucks bad. No wonder you like The CW.

I already have a hat.

This is the greatest hat ever, and I want one immediately. Where can I buy it?EDIT: I didn't see your response to Wang before I posted this.

Happy B-Day J-Brad!I guess Caleb must have had quite a few beers as I didn't see part twoAny word on Pete in the ME? Last post saw was the ugly KK/AA handHope the news turns better on the medical front for Mex and Matt - no long wait at least in the good ol USGood luck with the new girl Matt - be sure to post a a nice pic of your ex and a bad pic of the new girl at some point and then disappearSo we had my Dad/Step-Mom over last night; they just came back from a visit to China so this was their first look at our new dog. I mentioned that I didn't think that there were too many dogs as pets in China (insert dog on the menu joke here) but they both said that it had a lot do with the communist revolution.My step-mom said that they had two dogs as pets - a small white dog and a german shepherd before the revolution occurred. Afterwards due to the famine, it was decreed by the new government that all dogs would have to be rounded up and put down because they couldn't spare any food for pets. The dog catcher came for the little dog at first. The little dog begged to stay but was taken away. Her family visited him once at the facility; he had been put in a small cage and his paws were bloody from trying to get out. The second time they went, they were given the dog's collar.The dog catcher then came for the german shepherd. The shepherd was in the backyard and kept running away from the dog catcher. The man couldn't catch him but he had a throwing axe. After a few tries, he put it in the dog's back crippling him and took him away.Saddest 4th of July story I ever heard but a good reminder of how we forget sometimes how good we have it here.

You BASTARD! I don't even like dogs a little bit and this almost made me cry.

[CaneBrain 95]

I almost threw up I was laughing so hard at this, good one Nikki.Ron which disk. I have had the ol L5 S1 shot since I was 18. It's not fun. Lose the weight it will help, but it is also the catch 22, you hurt your back and stop working out and then repeat a viscous cycle. CaneBrain has the same issue.

vicious cycle is a good way to put it. my steroid treatments have worked really well though and I am exercising without much pain. Have not had to take a pain pill in 3 weeks. (Hydrocodone is the wussy stuff----get some oxycodone)I am down to 212 lbs (started my diet regimen at 229). Plus, I am working and studying like mad for the Bar Exam (3 weeks from Tuesday, fml).....so I dont have as much time to stuff myself full of french fries and what not.Wife and I are also moving into a new, bigger apartment in our building which is good because I totally needed another distraction in my life right now. 200 extra sq. feet for only 50 bucks extra per month is a good deal though.Sorry to hear the old lady pulled a vanishing act, Mex. Women. Can't live with em, can't shoot em.

[LadyGrey 6]

You have to do some good google work to find it...I just looked and couldn't, but I know it's out there. No, unfortunately that's not me.

You can buy it here for $135: http://www.scandinaviangrace.com/products/bed/accessories/39It's by the designer Vik Prjónsdóttir: http://www.vikprjonsdottir.com/products.htmlInstructions to make a similar hat for Nikki: http://www.instructables.com/id/How_to_Cro...he_Hat_Costume/Oh, and hello everyone. Seeing as I'm banished from the forum (not really though) this is just a cameo. Strategy, you have my deepest apologies for reneging on our deal.

[speedz99 145]

What's wrong with you guys? Such pussies. Don't you go to the same doctor every time? If I want pain pills, I ask my doc and he says ok.

I haven't gone to the same doctor for two visits in a row since I was in high school. Plus this'll be a specialist that obviously I've never seen before. From what I understand, most doctors are skeptical when a 20-something guy shows up, says his shoulder hurts, and asks for narcotics.

[speedz99 145]

Oh, and hello everyone.

Hello to you too. It turns out that I enjoy drinking tea with milk and sugar. I thought you should know...since I've always assumed that all English people drink tea and are excited when others do the same.Take care.

[jeff_536 3]

Funny:

[Quacktastic 106]

You're going to date a stripper?

Nice catch, I want to hear more about the stripper girl.

Oh, and hello everyone. Seeing as I'm banished from the forum (not really though) this is just a cameo. Strategy, you have my deepest apologies for reneging on our deal.

Didn't you just read the last page about anyone is allowed/noone is banned from the thread.I hope you stick around longer, if Strat gets to post under two names you should be allowed one.

[speedz99 145]

It's not the stripper, it's the other one. That's my last comment on it...for cereal this time.

[LadyGrey 6]

Hello to you too. It turns out that I enjoy drinking tea with milk and sugar. I thought you should know...since I've always assumed that all English people drink tea and are excited when others do the same.Take care.

Thanks for letting me know, you are correct in that it is essential for English people to know how their acquaintances take their tea. For example the lady I work with likes hers very weak with no milk or sugar. It is my duty to know this.

[Nikki_N 17]

vicious cycle is a good way to put it. my steroid treatments have worked really well though and I am exercising without much pain. Have not had to take a pain pill in 3 weeks. (Hydrocodone is the wussy stuff----get some oxycodone)I am down to 212 lbs (started my diet regimen at 229). Plus, I am working and studying like mad for the Bar Exam (3 weeks from Tuesday, fml).....so I dont have as much time to stuff myself full of french fries and what not.Wife and I are also moving into a new, bigger apartment in our building which is good because I totally needed another distraction in my life right now. 200 extra sq. feet for only 50 bucks extra per month is a good deal though.Sorry to hear the old lady pulled a vanishing act, Mex. Women. Can't live with em, can't shoot em.

I love Oxy. Too much. Had some in Vegas. Didn't drink on it. Didn't want to tempt fate.

You can buy it here for $135: http://www.scandinaviangrace.com/products/bed/accessories/39It's by the designer Vik Prjónsdóttir: http://www.vikprjonsdottir.com/products.htmlInstructions to make a similar hat for Nikki: http://www.instructables.com/id/How_to_Cro...he_Hat_Costume/Oh, and hello everyone. Seeing as I'm banished from the forum (not really though) this is just a cameo. Strategy, you have my deepest apologies for reneging on our deal.

Thanks LG! I may have to start on one today!

Hello to you too. It turns out that I enjoy drinking tea with milk and sugar. I thought you should know...since I've always assumed that all English people drink tea and are excited when others do the same.Take care.

I like mine with milk and sugar, too, but I don't drink things with calories unless they have booze in them. So I take my tea medium strength with four equals (per 16 oz).

[El Guapo 8]

I love this hat! I think I can make it!

You have at least 12 orders pending from the people who have posted here in the last day, I am sure more will come.

[jeff_536 3]

I love Oxy. Too much. Had some in Vegas. Didn't drink on it. Didn't want to tempt fate. Thanks LG! I may have to start on one today!I like mine with milk and sugar, too, but I don't drink things with calories unless they have booze in them. So I take my tea medium strength with four equals (per 16 oz).

Anyone who takes that much sugar/sweetener doesn't really like tea (or coffee).

[Nikki_N 17]

I have put aside my beer cozy project and started the beard/mustache hat. Who wants to be a red head (rusty orange)?

[Nikki_N 17]

Anyone who takes that much sugar/sweetener doesn't really like tea (or coffee).

But I really do! I just like it sweet. I have to give you credit in here for providing me with the oxy. Thanks, Blue.