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turd ferguson

I Called In Sick Today

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So I told my boss I had to stay home because I was having some plummers come and fix my apartment. I would have said I was sick, but I exausted that excuse last month. Anyway, long story short, I'm being useless from home today. Come celebrate my laziness in with me! I'll be watching tv in my underwear. Right now I'm watching this infomercial for the Magic Bullet. Anybody else seen this thing? It's amazing!Edit: I think I should let you all know that I'm not wearing a shirt or pants today. Just putting it out there.

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Hah. I'm jealous. I thought about not coming in today too. Mondays always blow.

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It's great so far except I lost my remote. I've been laying on the floor, changing the channel with my toe. I'm alternating between Sponge Bob, Scooby Doo, and SportsCenter.

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Hah. I'm jealous. I thought about not coming in today too. Mondays always blow.
I got up at 1.30pm. It's now 4.39 pm, and I'm debating whether or not I should have a shower. This is how every day goes for me. I have no direction in my life, and won't for at least another 5 months. Worship me.
Hah. I'm jealous. I thought about not coming in today too. Mondays always blow.
I watch Diagnosis Murder with **** Van Dyke.

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I got up at 1.30pm. It's now 4.39 pm, and I'm debating whether or not I should have a shower. This is how every day goes for me. I have no direction in my life, and won't for at least another 5 months. Worship me.
Haha. My job is actually really sweet. I'll probably just stop trading at noon and start playing poker. Lol.

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It's great so far except I lost my remote. I've been laying on the floor, changing the channel with my toe. I'm alternating between Sponge Bob, Scooby Doo, and SportsCenter.
Going to buy a universal remote is an acceptable reason to leave the house during a lazy-day. Also acceptable:Picking up Chinese FoodRan out of BeerHouse is on Fire

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lazy bast.ard.I'm gonna come out there and take your job.I hope you didn't shower. It can't technically be considered a proper sick day if you shower.

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Going to buy a universal remote is an acceptable reason to leave the house during a lazy-day. Also acceptable:Picking up Chinese FoodRan out of BeerHouse is on Fire
I'm thinking about it. Maybe sometime around 1:00. I'll probably go back to bed for a while soon.Chinese food sounds pretty good too. Thanks for the suggestion.

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How old are you?
18 I have about 4 weeks of actual High School left and just decided I didn't want to go today.I'm sitting here playing some poker, browsing the forums, playing some blast billiards and eating frosted mini wheats. Life is good.

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lazy bast.ard.I'm gonna come out there and take your job.I hope you didn't shower. It can't technically be considered a proper sick day if you shower.
I don't even shower on the days I go to work.

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I'm thinking about it. Maybe sometime around 1:00. I'll probably go back to bed for a while soon.Chinese food sounds pretty good too. Thanks for the suggestion.
Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain.

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I don't even shower on the days I go to work.
For some reason I kinda figured this.And for NapaDon: Advice from an older person:Have sex with as many high school girls as possible while it is still socially acceptable for you to do so.

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18 I have about 4 weeks of actual High School left and just decided I didn't want to go today.I'm sitting here playing some poker, browsing the forums, playing some blast billiards and eating frosted mini wheats. Life is good.
Sweet. I think I'll play some blast billiards myself, and then rip my pubic hair out by the fistful out of frustration.

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And for NapaDon: Advice from an older person:Have sex with as many high school girls as possible while it is still socially acceptable for you to do so.
Way ahead of you buddy. But thanks for the advice.

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Going to buy a universal remote is an acceptable reason to leave the house during a lazy-day.
I have one of those programmable universal remotes that operates the TV, DVD player, VCR, TiVo, and sound system. That thing goes through batteries like...something that goes through batteries very quickly. 4 AAA batteries every three days. I think I've almost exhausted the life of the rechargeable batteries. My personal favorite is when the batteries die in the middle of a fast forward on the tivo and there's no way of stopping it.Also, I'll probably be at work today for 14 hours.

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Haha. My job is actually really sweet. I'll probably just stop trading at noon and start playing poker. Lol.
Hey MK...what do u trade? Got a few friends at the Board and the Merc.

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Right now I'm watching this infomercial for the Magic Bullet. Anybody else seen this thing? It's amazing!
is it a vibrator?
Have sex with as many high school girls as possible while it is still socially acceptable for you to do so.
wait..at what age does it stop being acceptable? :club:

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Hioooooooooooooooooooo!It's a blender. It comes with everything you see here.MagBul-Set1.jpg
sweet, what do you get free if you call within the next 30 minutes?

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sweet, what do you get free if you call within the next 30 minutes?
You get the color coded save caps so everybody can know which magic bullet is theirs! However, you do lose your dignity and self respect. It's a pretty good trade I think.

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