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I Called In Sick Today


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But we all look alike even to each other so I refrained from yelling "SoCal"!
:schrutebuck:
Back from a long road trip....
Sorry about Missy. It's a great thing when you know on first sight that a dog is the one for you.
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:stanleynickel:
she is now referring to herself as joanna the orc
She's gaining weight over here already?
so apparently I went to the 98th best liberal arts college in the country. shouldn't that be worth... no, it isn't worth anything. shit.
A girl at work that went to my school told me yesterday that we're in the top 15 again this year. But that's also worth pretty much nothing since few people have heard of it. Today I was scratched by a cat, bitten by a dog, and jabbed with an 18 gauge needle (a vet went right through a cat's skin into my thumb). Gauge. Is that spelled correctly? It looks wrong. So does "jabbed"...not the spelling, but the usage. Are there two e's in "usage"?
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and after 3 days, he is risen!

If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

Pocket change cost me my first and only black girlfriend.   It was in the middle of a roaring poker boom and I was flush in ways most men don't even bother dreaming of. Money, it was like dirt to me

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just a normal death, but the guy had been sitting on the couch for a week or something. when the next guy walked into the room, at first he thought it was just a pile of clothes on the couch.
wow, what a lazy piece of shit that dude must've been. I'd hate to die and have someone think that little of me if I croaked
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just a normal death, but the guy had been sitting on the couch for a week or something.
wow, what a lazy piece of shit that dude must've been.
well to be fair, I think he was probably dead for most of that week.
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ah ok, that makes sense. well I mean, them not hiring you doesn't make sense, but the letter part. and the whole hiring stupid people thing always gets me too. two of the places I've been trying to get jobs at are NOTORIOUS for hiring morons. I mean I know one guy who worked at one of them who I wasn't really sure could read, and he got hired no problem. another dude I know who worked at one of the other places was a IT guy there and he had to get my buddy to show him how to install AVG on his personal computer. really? REALLY?maybe I need to put some typos in my resume and fart into the phone the next time an HR person calls me. hell, they'd make me CEO.
The first interview I went on out of college was to be an entry level fund accountant, the interview was with people who were to be my colleagues. My friend hooked up the interview, and basically I did not get the job because one girl there was threatened by me, that I would take away future promotions from her. I had a finance background, and she was like psych major or something and was way out of her league. Plus they were younger than me, because I did not graduate until 24.My friend asked me what they asked in the interview, and I told him that girl asked me if I had ever used XYZ software. I was unaware of it and answered honestly, "no". He immediately started laughing and said of course you have never used it, it is proprietary software to our company and that dumb bitch doesn't even know that.So I feel your guys pain. It took me over a year to find a right fit with a new firm, and when I met the guy I am working with now we spent over 6 months doing due diligence on each other.
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Back from a long road trip....Ill ketchup in a few days, but first a few thoughts about a member of the family that passed away this morningThe wife and I circled the cages inside the local animal shelter one evening fourteen years ago browsing the inventory of unwanted dogs. The vast majority were barking, howling, and jumping around the pens except for one pretty tan and white collie. She sat quietly looking at us just above the sign that read "Collie mix... Missy"..........
wow, sorry beansy.
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well to be fair, I think he was probably dead for most of that week.
my point was that he must've been a lazy shit if it was just assumed that it was clothes on the couch. People probably were just used to the clothes on the couch so it didn't phase them that there was this dude dead on it
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So I feel your guys pain. It took me over a year to find a right fit with a new firm, and when I met the guy I am working with now we spent over 6 months doing due diligence on each other.
If somebody ever did 5 minutes of due diligence on me I'm pretty sure they're running the other way.Good thing I only need 2
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my point was that he must've been a lazy shit if it was just assumed that it was clothes on the couch. People probably were just used to the clothes on the couch so it didn't phase them that there was this dude dead on it
nah, it was an empty staff housing apartment. dude one checked in, dropped his bags on the floor, sat on the couch, and died. a week later, dude two checked in, stepped over the bags at the door, saw a bunch of clothes on the couch, thought the guy who checked in the previous week was a pig who really really smelled bad, chose a bed, then went to watch tv. i don't know if he tried to move the pile of clothes or what, but he checked out a few minutes later.
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Thanks for all the kind words guys...Its good to know that I can get completely sloshed and share my feelings with a group of folks that I only know from bits (bytes?) of information shared thru a phone line and not get that raised eyebrow look like I get from the local gas station attendantNah, just kidding about the attendant.... Ive been a hermit for the last coupe of days and strayed no farther than the beer storeOne highlight of my trip was finding the exact location of cousin Eddies trailer location in Vegas Vacation last week. I proudly stood there drinking a beer or eleven and imagined Vickies pole dance routine....Several days of Google Earth research along with sheer boredom paid offI only wish I was joking....Anyways, I got caught up with my obligations for a few weeks and instead of moping around the house Ive decided to head back out somewhere for a whileIm thinking Reno...I still have a score to settle with the Cal Neva over a twenty one mishap that ended me up with a dealers tie between my teethThey need to be reminded of how Frank ran the place back in the dayIll check back in before I leave and try to post something amusing

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Sal Papagorgio...I love it.
yeah that could be my favorite so far.that makes me think, i need to start working on a halloween costume for this year. every year I don't think about it until the last minute, then come up with some great idea only to not have enough time to pull it off. now that the cd project in the music thread has me thinking about fall already, I can already start thinking about ideas. anybody?
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I only wish I was joking....Anyways, I got caught up with my obligations for a few weeks and instead of moping around the house Ive decided to head back out somewhere for a whileIm thinking Reno...I still have a score to settle with the Cal Neva over a twenty one mishap that ended me up with a dealers tie between my teethThey need to be reminded of how Frank ran the place back in the dayIll check back in before I leave and try to post something amusing
I always liked how Uncle Frank ran the Fremont.
Sal Papagorgio...I love it.It's 9 am on a Saturday, I'm at the library sober as a priest. I don't like me anymore.
Don't you have a test today?
yeah that could be my favorite so far.that makes me think, i need to start working on a halloween costume for this year. every year I don't think about it until the last minute, then come up with some great idea only to not have enough time to pull it off. now that the cd project in the music thread has me thinking about fall already, I can already start thinking about ideas. anybody?
I got nothing.My head hurts.
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First words out of my mouth this morning.I wish it was Sunday. I hate work. I hate people. I'm hungover.Sal, we can't think about your Halloween costume until after Labor day. It's a law or something.I talked to Deb's mom last night and she loves the cat I got her. It's been a great thing. The cat follows her everywhere and sleeps with her. She hasn't scratched anything either. She talks to it all day and has provided great company. The cats really glad we didn't take it to Speedz's vet to get jabbed by needles either.Vegas Vacation is a classic. I love at the beginning when Chevy Chase is telling the kids about the vacation plans and says, "you grow up so fast it's like I hardly recognize you" and the kids do the deadpan look at the camera since they're like the 4th set to play the kids.

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Does anyone remember that commercial from a couple years ago where the guy who graduated college is in the car with his boss and answers his phone to his old roommate going "Guess how many oreos I have in my mouth?" Anyone know what company it was for? LG - I'm trying to find that commercial online somewhere so let me know when you find it.

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Does anyone remember that commercial from a couple years ago where the guy who graduated college is in the car with his boss and answers his phone to his old roommate going "Guess how many oreos I have in my mouth?" Anyone know what company it was for? LG - I'm trying to find that commercial online somewhere so let me know when you find it.
I think it's a cell phone company but not sure.
I did the relay4life last night.. all night..Then at 6 in the morning i realize my shorts are on backwards.
What the hell are you talking about and why did you have your shorts on backwards.IT'S HOT AS HELL TODAY!
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I think it's a cell phone company but not sure. What the hell are you talking about and why did you have your shorts on backwards.IT'S HOT AS HELL TODAY!
You know, the cancer walk thingy..And I have no clue why.. But I felt like such an ass.
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