you know you're playing a fish when he says...

[Rebecca 0]

LHE live $50 tourn with six of us, lvl 3 or 4ish..I'm second in chipsI'm in late position, with A 1o . Being the first to enter the pot, I raise. Genius on button (short stack) pauses, says "WTH, it's cheap" and calls, SB folds, BB calls.Flop: A 3 J BB checks , I bet, button genius calls. BB foldsTurn: K I bet, Genius calls.(I know I'm okay at this point, cause this guy is so predictable....he ALWAYS raises when he has hit top pair or better.)River: Q :spade:With sinking feeling, I check (played with him a lot)...genius bets...I make the crying call and he turns over.....5 4:heart:He then says, "I knew I had ya beat, even before the flop" and "I always seem to hit the best flush when I start with good connectors"WTH is right!

[looshle 6]

LHE live $50 tourn with six of us, lvl 3 or 4ish..I'm second in chipsI'm in late position, with A 1o . Being the first to enter the pot, I raise. Genius on button (short stack) pauses, says "WTH, it's cheap" and calls, SB folds, BB calls.Flop: A 3 J BB checks , I bet, button genius calls. BB foldsTurn: K I bet, Genius calls.(I know I'm okay at this point, cause this guy is so predictable....he ALWAYS raises when he has hit top pair or better.)River: Q :spade:With sinking feeling, I check (played with him a lot)...genius bets...I make the crying call and he turns over.....5 4:heart:He then says, "I knew I had ya beat, even before the flop" and "I always seem to hit the best flush when I start with good connectors"WTH is right!

How could be be a fish when he value bet his extremely low flush?? :wink:

[looshle 6]

LHE live $50 tourn with six of us, lvl 3 or 4ish..I'm second in chipsI'm in late position, with A 1o . Being the first to enter the pot, I raise. Genius on button (short stack) pauses, says "WTH, it's cheap" and calls, SB folds, BB calls.Flop: A 3 J BB checks , I bet, button genius calls. BB foldsTurn: K I bet, Genius calls.(I know I'm okay at this point, cause this guy is so predictable....he ALWAYS raises when he has hit top pair or better.)River: Q :spade:With sinking feeling, I check (played with him a lot)...genius bets...I make the crying call and he turns over.....5 4:heart:He then says, "I knew I had ya beat, even before the flop" and "I always seem to hit the best flush when I start with good connectors"WTH is right!

How could be be a fish when he value bet his extremely low flush?? :wink:

[NortonFan 0]

LHE live $50 tourn with six of us, lvl 3 or 4ish..I'm second in chipsI'm in late position, with A 1o . Being the first to enter the pot, I raise. Genius on button (short stack) pauses, says "WTH, it's cheap" and calls, SB folds, BB calls.Flop: A 3 J BB checks , I bet, button genius calls. BB foldsTurn: K I bet, Genius calls.(I know I'm okay at this point, cause this guy is so predictable....he ALWAYS raises when he has hit top pair or better.)River: Q :spade:With sinking feeling, I check (played with him a lot)...genius bets...I make the crying call and he turns over.....5 4:heart:He then says, "I knew I had ya beat, even before the flop" and "I always seem to hit the best flush when I start with good connectors"WTH is right!

You got schooled.

[looshle 6]

I'm playing 1/2 NL after I got knocked out of the tournament everyone was there to play. I'm running hot right now, hitting every single AK, AQ, and having all my pockets holding up so I'm probably up close to $350-$400.I'm UTG and look down @ AA, so I make it $8.Fish to my direct left, UTG + 1, makes it $16.Folded around to me, I make it $40.He makes it $80.I put him all in for about $120 total, so its like $40 back to him and he hates it, like hes thinking about folding.He looks at me and says "You got a good hand huh?"It takes me re reaising his 80 DOLLAR BET for him to realize I have a good hand.He calls, I flip up the aces, ask him what he's got, he says he's got a "drawing hand."Board comes 3 8 5 Q T.And what was the drawing hand worth $120??T8o.

[Smiff85 0]

May we please get back to the real purpose of this threadhome game about a month ago K9 in BB, MP raise, Im only callerflop AK9, I check so does heturn 4I check, he bets little ove rhalf the pot, I raise about 3 times his bet, he callsriver 4Im think crap....if he has an A now im fuckedI check, he checksI turn over my K9"Man, that was a nice flop for you"...he flashes an Ace and mucks

hahhahahahahahahahahahahah class.Hope this thread never dies.

[mike12344556 0]

$5 Hu SNG stars MR PAULSEN: u have won 2 hands one with pocket jacks and the other with poket kings i wouldnt be to proud yetafter i took teh chip lead with kk vrs q9 flop 9 high, cracked him next hand with 33

[WasaMaNG 0]

10man $10 nlhe re-buy tournament=====================================P1: As, 10sFish: 2h, 3cp1 (UTG+2) raises to 3xbb, fold to Fish (button) calls, blinds foldFlop: 6h, 6d, 9cp1 checks, Fish checks (with...almost the Anti-Nutz)Turn: 9hp1 bets, Fish calls (with...the Anti-Nutz)River: 3sp1 bets, Fish calls (with again...the Anti-Nutz)p1 shows As, 10c for two pair 6s and 9s, ace highFish shows 2h, 3c for two pairs 6s and 9s, three high (the Anti-Nutz)p1 wins the pot with two pair 6s and 9s, ace high :?

[kers2 0]

I was playing in a home game (cash game) last night and this one guy was simply amazing.Player one was heads up with the fish in question on a board that read:K 6 9 7 5 (suits irrelevant)The hand was bet and raised on the river, so player one (who held 7 8 ) called and figured they were probably splitting the pot. So player one calls and shows, then the fish flips over his K 8 and starts to rake the whole pot.Me: What are you doing, its a split pot?Fish: But I have a straight with a pair of kings kicker...Absolute Cash

[Crack User 0]

i was playing some big stakes at the bel and this man in a yellow hat says to me after my pot odds 78s took down his AKo ....damn kid you are just dying to pay me off with you're terrible play arent you i asked him if he ever heard of pot odds and he tells me I DONT CARE ABOUT YOUR POT DRUGS KID I HAVENT DONE THAT STUFF SINCE THE 60's he yells and racks his chips and leavess whole table was lauging so foakin hard i tell yaGood Luck.

[BETNFOOL 0]

i was playing some big stakes at the bel and this man in a yellow hat says to me after my pot odds 78s took down his AKo ....damn kid you are just dying to pay me off with you're terrible play arent you i asked him if he ever heard of pot odds and he tells me I DONT CARE ABOUT YOUR POT DRUGS KID I HAVENT DONE THAT STUFF SINCE THE 60's he yells and racks his chips and leavess  whole table was lauging so foakin hard i tell yaGood Luck.

i wanted to be the first to ask, did that man have a monkey with him ??just curious

[kers2 0]

Ok so I'm playing in a weekly home tournament, and some new blood from my work decided that he wanted to play. I pretty much had him pegged as a fish, but this one blew me away...About 3rd level into the tournament, and this guy is just eating people alive. He's stayed in every pot, and every hand he has shown down has been a monster, but usually a suckout. He is a monster chipleader, but we are all just waiting for him to implode, when this hand came up:My friend Mike raises from late position with A Q after the Fish had limped in. Fish is the only caller and they see a flop of A 8 Q Fish bets minimum, Mike raises 3x his bet, Fish callsTurn is a 9 , Fish bets minimum, Mike raises, Fish callsRiver is a 10 for a final board of A 8 Q 9 10 Fish bets minimum again, Mike goes all in, Fish calls INSTANTLYMike flips over his 2 pair figuring he is beat, and Fish goes "I have nothing" and flips over KING FREAKING 2 OFFSUIT for a K high!!!I go "why would you call his all in with a King high??????"Fish says "I figured I could push him out of the pot because I was a big stack. Money talks baby!!"I didnt even bother trying to explain that he couldnt push someone who was all in out of a pot by calling, I was too busy cleaning up the piss from the floor after everyone in the room died laughing.

[ShieldWolf 0]

A guy I know tries to tell me a story about how he got "fished" in a NL Holdem tournament...Bear in mind, this guy (like most amatuer players) thinks he's much better than he is. Claims he always knows what someone has because he can "see into their soul." Anyway, here's his story..."You're not gonna believe this. Okay, so it's like the fifth hand of the game. Blinds are 10/20. I have pocket 8s and I'm in the small blind. It's just me and the other guy. I call. He checks. Flop comes down...Q 5 3. I bet 20. He raises me 40. I figure he's got Ace/Queen...so I call. Turn comes down...6. I check. He bets 40. I call. River comes down...I don't remember what it was. It was like a 10. I check. He bets 40. Well, now I gotta see what he has, so I call. He flips over a 2 4 and he's got a straight. I'm like 'What the **** did you call me with that for?' And he just laughed. I was so mad. Just nothing you can do about it when you get unlucky like that."Normally I would smile and nod, but I really wanted to figure out the logic on this one. Here were some of the questions and answers:Me: "Why didn't you raise before the flop with your eights?"Him: "I never raise with mid pocket pairs.""Me: "Ok, so you bet out on the flop, he raised and you figured he had a queen. Why did you call?"Him: "I wanted to see if another 8 would come off. Cause if it came off I was golden."Me: "You put 40 into a pot of 100 when you called. So you are getting 2 and a half to 1 to call. Do you know what the odds of getting a third 8 are for you?"Him: "....Well it didn't matter. I was winning and he called me with a 2 4."Me: "No, he RAISED you on an outside straight draw after you mini-bet. Then he value bet on the turn and river."Him: "Well, he sucked out on me!"At that point I gave up and just said "Well, it happens."[/b]

[THE_ANDYAA 0]

"J9 hits more than aces in percentages"

[lboarts 0]

A guy I know tries to tell me a story about how he got "fished" in a NL Holdem tournament...Bear in mind, this guy (like most amatuer players) thinks he's much better than he is.  Claims he always knows what someone has because he can "see into their soul."  Anyway, here's his story..."You're not gonna believe this.  Okay, so it's like the fifth hand of the game.  Blinds are 10/20.  I have pocket 8s and I'm in the small blind.  It's just me and the other guy.  I call.  He checks.  Flop comes down...Q 5 3.  I bet 20.  He raises me 40.  I figure he's got Ace/Queen...so I call.  Turn comes down...6.  I check.  He bets 40.  I call.  River comes down...I don't remember what it was.  It was like a 10.  I check.  He bets 40.  Well, now I gotta see what he has, so I call.  He flips over a 2 4 and he's got a straight.  I'm like 'What the **** did you call me with that for?'  And he just laughed.  I was so mad.  Just nothing you can do about it when you get unlucky like that."Normally I would smile and nod, but I really wanted to figure out the logic on this one.  Here were some of the questions and answers:Me: "Why didn't you raise before the flop with your eights?"Him: "I never  raise with mid pocket pairs.""Me: "Ok, so you bet out on the flop, he raised and you figured he had a queen.  Why did you call?"Him: "I wanted to see if another 8 would come off.  Cause if it came off I was golden."Me: "You put 40 into a pot of 100 when you called.  So you are getting 2 and a half to 1 to call.  Do you know what the odds of getting a third 8 are for you?"Him: "....Well it didn't matter.  I was winning and he called me with a 2 4."Me: "No, he RAISED you on an outside straight draw after you mini-bet.  Then he value bet on the turn and river."Him: "Well, he sucked out on me!"At that point I gave up and just said "Well, it happens."[/b]

And the moral of the story is:Never, ever tap the glass!!

[aadams_22 3]

I'm still trying to figure out how he thinks that he's golden if he hits that third 8 when the guy hit his straight on the turn. :?

[JSHamm 9]

I'm still trying to figure out how he thinks that he's golden if he hits that third 8 when the guy hit his straight on the turn.  :?

I guess because his superior reading skills put the other guy on a Queen.

[mrdannyg 274]

A guy I know tries to tell me a story about how he got "fished" in a NL Holdem tournament... I have pocket 8s  Flop comes down...Q 5 3.  I bet 20.  He raises me 40.  I figure he's got Ace/Queen...so I call.  

this is my favourite part. "i figure i'm down to two outs...so i call"i love showing down a moderately strong hand, like TPTK or two pair, where it was blatantly obvious what i had, and some fish says something like "that's what i put you on" or "that's what i figured you had" better yet "i knew you had that"then mucks his hand.teneight

[No_Neck 0]

last night at a cash game one of my friends who is not a fish by any stretch but he had been pour jack daniels down his throat like it was his job, anyway we are playing .25/.50 NL and there are 10 people around an 8 person table but the money is insane (for the limits) we probably had 400 dollars on the table. This guy is a huge stack probably 75 dollars and I am .25 ahead of him. The thing is he was pushing everyone around on the river. He was going all in every time he got to the river and making people fold. Anyway this hand comes up I have Q10 and the flop comes queen high. So I have a pair of queen and he bets some ridiculous amount so I call him, on the river of course he pushes all in. After about 2 minutes I make the call and he turns over ace high and I rake in a monster pot. That set him off he went on and on for probably 30 minutes about how there is no way I should be making that call and if I keep making that call I am going to go broke blah blah. That is my favorite when people berate you for calling there obvious bluff. But I ended up with 170 bucks, not bad for a home game.

[aadams_22 3]

"with 65 outs you'd think I would hit one of them"

[DCWildcat 0]

"Can't we just play with antes? That way we wouldn't have to remember who has the button and stuff."

[Coop3369 0]

" If you're thinking about kickers.............you're thinking too much."" Of course I will go all-in on a flush draw, it's an obvious call."

[rog 0]

This is from a home game I played in on the weekend. He said this about 8 times to me:"How can you fold before the flop! You've only seen 2 cards from your hand! I cant believe this!"

[flyingmachine 0]

A Hole Fish to me: You are so easy to read, so predictableMe to Fish: Yep, you got me figured out, I can see all the money you took from meFish:How can I win when all you play is AK?

[RayPowers 0]

Panella86: 1-2- 20 beers inPanella86: makes u way better