I Called In Sick Today

[Whiskey16 1]

Yeah, I was just joshin' ya'. I'm decent enough at poker to figure out the basics- such as the rules- and some strategy. I just need to learn which hands I can open up with in a looser game, and a little about promoting mediocre hands/draws with bets/raises after the flop.Wang

Nice post from the strat section:http://www.fullcontactpoker.com/poker-foru...showtopic=40778

[KDawgCometh 2]

I'm not. At all. But for some reason that song was in my head and I used it as an example. Pretty weird choice, huh?

I found it really weird too, cause I remember u saying at one point that you weren't that into phish. Threw me for a loop

[wangs ex-girlfriend 3]

I just need to learn which hands I can open up with in a looser gameWang

You're not playing "Big game safari hunter" with me again!I can just take one at a time

[rocketpoker828 0]

.go bang the gf

Dogdammit.

Yeah, I realize that now. See I was under the impression that that's how it's been said all this time because to me it's infintly funnier this way "billlions, if not millions". Sorry.Ira

The "Ira" at the end makes this millions, if not billions, times funnier.

[Naked_Cowboy 0]

Wang,I probably have as many, if not more, O8 hands played as hold em hands played. If you want to play it limit, super system (2 i think?) has a decent beginning limit section, as does this board. After that if you want to discuss actual hands or overall strategy, play a session, or whatever I'm available pretty much 16 hours a day.

[Shimmering Wang 1]

Wang,I probably have as many, if not more, O8 hands played as hold em hands played. If you want to play it limit, super system (2 i think?) has a decent beginning limit section, as does this board. After that if you want to discuss actual hands or overall strategy, play a session, or whatever I'm available pretty much 16 hours a day.

Yeah, I'll let you know. Next time I play, I'm going to write down some interesting hands and fire you and Speedz a PM or two, and maybe post a hand in here or something.Thanks,Wang

[IQCrash 1]

You're not playing "Big game safari hunter" with me again!I can just take one at a time

Wang, dang sweet poontang.

[ajs510 122]

BTW, in deference to our discussion the other day about owning a large number of DVD's but never watching any of them, I've busted out Two Hours of Jessica Alba's Ass in a Bikini...aka Into the Blue. Yeah, I'm bored, wanna fight about it?

[KDawgCometh 2]

BTW, in deference to our discussion the other day about owning a large number of DVD's but never watching any of them, I've busted out Two Hours of Jessica Alba's *** in a Bikini...aka Into the Blue. Yeah, I'm bored, wanna fight about it?

when was this convo. I have around 450 DVDs and probably like 30 at last count that I haven't seen yet

[LadyGrey 6]

Thanks, Zimmer, but that was easily the most condescending advice I've ever received. You know I've played like 2 million hands of poker in my life, right? And that I'm not retarded? My favorite part was "Also, you win the whole pot if there is no low available." Thanks. I wasn't sure if the hand was redealt or what...Wang

I laughed so hard at this that my laughter morphed into a sound akin to a guinea pig being strangled. I have played all of 1 O8 tournament, in which I came 12/~360. I achieved this by playing extremely tight until just 20 people were left, then feeding every hand to JeffStrat on aim and doing what he told me. I think I would have done better without him though.

[turd ferguson 1]

Black people can call him on it...but with the Flava Flavs out there they have bigger chickens to fry.

Fuck that. Black people shouldn't be the only ones allowed to point out racism. There are a bunch of black "leaders" that are way more bigoted than any southern redneck. See Whiskey's post below. Then the lower class black people buy into all of this because it takes the responsibility off their shoulders for being losers, and then they become responsible for the majority of the racism in this country, which works out perfectly people like Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton because the people aren't going to manipulate themselves right?

Jesse Jackson, the good reverend, might be the most racist person I've ever heard speak. That's not usually what's discussed, though.

Nikki and I will be there, but I don't think Cindy's gonna make it.

Everyone already sucked your **** for this one, but I got no problem with sloppy seconds.

[mk 11]

Yeah, I'll let you know. Next time I play, I'm going to write down some interesting hands and fire you and Speedz a PM or two, and maybe post a hand in here or something.Thanks,Wang

if i were you, i'd send pm's to hoosieralum and/or chamonyx. those two guys are the best O8 players here.wintermute's blog is 1000% hilarious, mostly detailing his drunken vegas rampages and hitting and running 1k/2k O8 on full tilt against matusow, but some of his older posts have some decent O8 content. he's a good player, has won at all levels online.

[leftygolfer 7]

Congrats adam and mike!We playing tonight?Did we go a whole day without any jokes/words of wisdom/comments from Senor Mexico?I have nothing else.

[mk 11]

yeah, i'll set up the tourney for tonight although i might not be able to play.

[mk 11]

Tourney 44758525 Stars - Tourney - Private 21:15 EST $5.50 NL Sick Thread Virginament Week 2

[leftygolfer 7]

thx mk4 User(s) are reading this topic (0 Guests and 0 Anonymous Users)4 Members: leftygolfer, mk, RhinestoneCowboy, Ron_Mexicoany good lady grey stories?

[Painter567 0]

A little gift to my friends the Sickies.....Rear of the Year!

[JSHamm 9]

A little gift to my friends the Sickies.....Rear of the Year!

I'm going with William only because I giggle when I say "Willy". Thanks.

[strategy 4]

I think I would have done better without him though.

not the first time I've heard this from youhioooooooo[waits for laughter]

[JSHamm 9]

not the first time I've heard this from youhioooooooo[waits for laughter]

[JoeyJoJo 18]

A little gift to my friends the Sickies.....Rear of the Year!

Which one is ChrisRichey's girl?[/obvious joke]The alter-ego award got more "discussion" than any other award.I see Matt Damon and PACTinfo2 outside the thread more than in it. I like Dr. Seuss, but this is the first time I've seen him. Who is that?

[Saint Peter 0]

I like Dr. Seuss, but this is the first time I've seen him. Who is that?

Theodor Seuss Geisel (March 2, 1904 – September 24, 1991) was a famous American writer and cartoonist best known for his classic children's books under the pen name Dr. Seuss, including The Cat in the Hat, Green Eggs and Ham, and How the Grinch Stole Christmas. His books have become staples for many children and their parents. Seuss' trademark was his rhyming text and outlandish creatures. He also wrote under the pseudonym Theo. LeSieg. He wrote and illustrated 44 children's books.Geisel was born on March 2, 1904 in Springfield, Massachusetts. Ted's father was a parks commissioner in charge of Forest Park, a huge park that included within its borders a zoo and was located three blocks from a library. Both Ted's father and grandfather were also brewmasters in Springfield, which may have influenced his views on Prohibition. As a freshman member of the Dartmouth College class of 1925, he joined the Dartmouth Jack-O-Lantern humor magazine, which he pursued as his primary activity throughout college, eventually rising to the rank of editor-in-chief. (He took over the post from his close friend, author Norman MacLean.) However, after he was caught throwing a drinking party (and thereby violating Prohibition), the school insisted that Ted resign from all extra-curricular activities. In order to continue his work on the Jack-O-Lantern without the administration's knowledge, Ted began signing his work with the pen name "Seuss" (which was both his middle name and his mother's maiden name). His first work signed as "Dr. Seuss" appeared after he graduated, six months into his work for The Judge (a humor magazine). Being an immigrant from Germany, the name "Seuss" would have been pronounced "zoice", the standard pronunciation in German (according to censuses, Giesel's mother was born in Massachusetts, and it was her parents who were the immigrants). Alexander Liang, who served with Geisel on the staff of the Jack-O- Lantern and was later a professor at Dartmouth, illustrated this point with the following Seuss-esque rhyme:You're wrong as the deuceAnd you shouldn't rejoiceIf you're calling him Seuss.He pronounces it Soice.Though Geisel himself has been quoted as saying "Seuss -- rhymes with voice", the name is almost universally pronounced in English with an initial s sound and rhyming with "juice".[1] Geisel also used the pen name Theo. LeSieg (Geisel spelled backwards) for books he wrote but others illustrated.He entered Lincoln College, Oxford, intending to earn a doctorate in literature. At Oxford he met Helen Palmer, married her in 1927, and returned to the United States without earning the degree. The "Dr." in his pen name is an acknowledgment of his father's unfulfilled hopes that Seuss would earn a doctorate at Oxford.He began submitting humorous articles and illustrations to Judge, The Saturday Evening Post, Life, Vanity Fair, and Liberty. One notable "Technocracy Number" made fun of Technocracy Movement and featured satirical rhymes at the expense of Frederick Soddy. He became nationally famous from his advertisements for Flit, a common insecticide at the time. His slogan, "Quick, Henry, the Flit!" became a popular catchphrase. Geisel supported himself and his wife through the Great Depression by drawing advertising for General Electric, NBC, Standard Oil, and many other companies. He also wrote and drew a short-lived comic strip called Hejji in 1935.In 1937, while Seuss was again on an ocean voyage to Europe, the rhythm of the ship's engines inspired the poem that became his first book, And to Think That I Saw It on Mulberry Street. Seuss wrote three more children's books before World War II (see list of works below), two of which are, atypically for him, in prose.As World War II began, Dr. Seuss turned to political cartoons, drawing over 400 in two years as editorial cartoonist for the left-wing New York City daily newspaper, PM. Dr. Seuss's political cartoons opposed the viciousness of Hitler and Mussolini and were highly critical of isolationists, most notably Charles Lindbergh, who opposed American entry into the war. Some cartoons depicted all Japanese Americans as latent traitors or fifth-columnists, while at the same time other cartoons deplored the racism at home against Jews and blacks that harmed the war effort. His cartoons were strongly supportive of President Roosevelt's conduct of the war, combining the usual exhortations to ration and contribute to the war effort with frequent attacks on Congress (especially the Republican Party), parts of the press (such as the New York Daily News and Chicago Tribune), and others for criticism of Roosevelt, criticism of aid to the Soviet Union, investigation of suspected Communists, and other offenses that he depicted as leading to disunity and helping the Nazis, intentionally or inadvertently. In 1942, Dr. Seuss turned his energies to direct support of the U.S. war effort. First, he worked drawing posters for the Treasury Department and the War Production Board. Then, in 1943, he joined the Army and was commander of the Animation Dept of the First Motion Picture Unit of the United States Army Air Forces, where he wrote films that included Your Job in Germany, a 1945 propaganda film about peace in Europe after World War II, Design for Death, a study of Japanese culture that won the Academy Award for Best Documentary in 1947, and the Private Snafu series of adult army training films. While in the Army, he was awarded the Legion of Merit. Dr. Seuss's non-military films from around this time were also well-received; Gerald McBoing-Boing won the Academy Award for Best Short Subject (Animated) in 1950.Despite his numerous awards, Dr. Seuss never won the Caldecott Medal nor the Newbery. Three of his titles were chosen as Caldecott runners-up (now referred to as Caldecott Honor books): McElligot's Pool (1947), Bartholomew and the Oobleck (1949), and If I Ran the Zoo (1950).After the war, Dr. Seuss and his wife moved to La Jolla, California. Returning to children's books, he wrote what many consider to be his finest works, including such favorites as If I Ran the Zoo, (1950), Scrambled Eggs Super! (1953), On Beyond Zebra! (1955), If I Ran the Circus (1956), and How the Grinch Stole Christmas! (1957).At the same time, an important development occurred that influenced much of Seuss's later work. In May 1954, Life magazine published a report on illiteracy among school children, which concluded that children were not learning to read because their books were boring. Accordingly, Seuss's publisher made up a list of 400 words he felt were important and asked Dr. Seuss to cut the list to 250 words and write a book using only those words. Nine months later, Seuss, using 220 of the words given to him, completed The Cat in the Hat. This book was a tour de force—it retained the drawing style, verse rhythms, and all the imaginative power of Seuss's earlier works, but because of its simplified vocabulary could be read by beginning readers. A rumor exists, that in 1960, Bennett Cerf bet Dr. Seuss $50 that he couldn't write an entire book using only fifty words. The result was supposedly Green Eggs and Ham. The additional rumor that Cerf never paid Seuss the $50 has never been proven and is most likely untrue. These books achieved significant international success and remain very popular.Dr. Seuss went on to write many other children's books, both in his new simplified-vocabulary manner (sold as "Beginner Books") and in his older, more elaborate style. In 1982 Dr. Seuss wrote "Hunches in Bunches". The Beginner Books were not easy for Seuss, and reportedly he labored for months crafting them.At various times Seuss also wrote books for adults that used the same style of verse and pictures: The Seven Lady Godivas; Oh, The Places You'll Go!; and You're Only Old Once.During a very difficult illness, Dr. Seuss' wife, Helen Palmer Geisel died on October 23, 1967. Seuss married Audrey Stone Dimond on June 21, 1968. Seuss himself died, following several years of illness, in La Jolla, California on September 24, 1991.In 2002, the Dr. Seuss National Memorial Sculpture Garden opened in his birthplace of Springfield, Massachusetts; it features sculptures of Dr. Seuss and of many of his characters.Today, many people view Dr. Seuss as one of the greatest children's book writers of all time

[Dr Seuss 0]

Ron_Mexico made his 10,000th postI stopped in for just a quick roastNow I'm backfor just a quick rompsince you're all so cuteand trill, Wamp Wamp

Oh how I loveRon MexicoI want to beyour e-hodrop your pantsflick your switchtickle my ***scratch my itchspray my facewith your man paintwhile i tickle your ballsand lick your taintHorray for 10kyou're really a champyou make me feel like a pedophile at boy's camp

[speedz99 145]

Hey. Speedz. You wanna teach me how to play good Omaha/8? I deal it all day when I work, and the other room I work at is spreading it now, too. I've played two sessions, and because I'm not retarded I think I can beat the game when the ultra loose players are gambling by just playing better hands, but I know I'm missing bets and chances to thin the field all over the place. In short, I think I'm pretty bad postflop. Wang

Sure...what do you want to know? Sorry, I'm not one to write a hugely long post full of general rules of how to play. Once you know the starting hands (which I can only assume you do because you're not retarded) it's pretty tricky post-flop...which is why you'll make a lot of money in the game if you get even decent at it. I dunno, give me something specific.I can't believe Matt Damon wasn't in the initial nominations.

[speedz99 145]

Fuck that. Black people shouldn't be the only ones allowed to point out racism. There are a bunch of black "leaders" that are way more bigoted than any southern redneck. See Whiskey's post below. Then the lower class black people buy into all of this because it takes the responsibility off their shoulders for being losers, and then they become responsible for the majority of the racism in this country, which works out perfectly people like Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton because the people aren't going to manipulate themselves right?

I hope you watched South Park last night. Look, I completely agree with you. Go look up some of Bill Cosby's recent speeches, they'll give you a little hope for the future.I'm not sure how I feel about Dr. Seuss. Though he is technically a brother of mine.