Skeleton Jelly 2 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 Using the word "ends" implies that it begins, which I think is pretty...generous.Yeah.Maybe you've heard it called bear mace?Dude, bears be attackin' lately. Must be the weather. when I was in the ocean the other day, there were a few sharks around but they saw me and got all scared like "that dude's gonna whoop our asses man get outta here!" so it was all good. Not these sharks yo Link to post Share on other sites
JubilantLankyLad 1,957 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 I think Batman keeps it in his helicopter next to the shark repellant.This is the same joke I was going to make, except I was going to do it visually with a screencap and some MS Paint photoshop, but I got too busy lazy. Link to post Share on other sites
JubilantLankyLad 1,957 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 Not these sharks yoIt's ok, Shake's not a chick in a bikini, or black, so he's safe. Link to post Share on other sites
speedz99 145 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 bears on the other hand, aren't afraid of an ass whoopin'. I will rape those bitches though.Well that's what Yogi gets for flirting.Not these sharks yoHollywood really is running out of ideas. "Well, what haven't we done for a while? Slasher and/or torture porn? Shark attack? WAIT A MINUTE!" Link to post Share on other sites
Skeleton Jelly 2 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 Hollywood really is running out of ideas. "Well, what haven't we done for a while? Slasher and/or torture porn? Shark attack? WAIT A MINUTE!" From the producers ofHosteland one of the producers ofTexas Chainsaw MassacreThe "one of the producers" part makes me laugh. Link to post Share on other sites
speedz99 145 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 Religion CAN be funny! Link to post Share on other sites
Skeleton Jelly 2 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 My idea for an animal-based horror movie would be to go away from the super fast and/or abnormally large types. Slow and normal-sized, that's the way to go. Like old school zombies that are just walking. Dawn of the Sloths. Imagine that. At first you're all like "oh noes a bunch of sloths are after me; I guess I'll saunter away." But they keep gaining on you! It's inexplicable. And then there's the sloth that you never saw coming who...I don't know what a sloth would do to you. Let me do some research (that's the mark of a good writer; always doing their research).Check out those claws! It's the animal kingdom's Freddy Krueger.Done and done. Link to post Share on other sites
ShakeZuma 585 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 Not these sharks yoto be fair to the shark though, I'd bite her ass too.hoozah!nah, the best horror movies are the ones where you never see it BOO!haha, scared ass bitches Link to post Share on other sites
vbnautilus 48 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 This is interesting enough that I am posting it in multiple places, so apologies if you already saw it in the other place I posted it. This was posted all over my neighborhood this morning. I've blurred out the number because if one of you comes up with the site, I am taking the credit. Make sure to read all of the text. Link to post Share on other sites
loogie 115 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 Religion CAN be funny! Sssssssssssssmoking! Link to post Share on other sites
JubilantLankyLad 1,957 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 Sssssssssssssmoking!maybe she quit recently Link to post Share on other sites
JubilantLankyLad 1,957 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest2011 Results http://www.bulwer-lytton.com/2011.htm Link to post Share on other sites
Skeleton Jelly 2 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest2011 Results http://www.bulwer-lytton.com/2011.htm I think these were my favorites:From the limbs of ancient live oaks moccasins hung like fat black sausages -- which are sometimes called boudin noir, black pudding or blood pudding, though why anyone would refer to a sausage as pudding is hard to understand and it is even more difficult to divine why a person would knowingly eat something made from dried blood in the first place -- but be that as it may, our tale is of voodoo and foul murder, not disgusting food. Jack BarryThe victim was a short man, with a face full of contradictions: amalgam, composite, dental porcelain, with both precious and non-precious metals all competing for space in a mouth that was open, bloody, terrifying, gaping, exposing a clean set of asymptomatic impacted wisdom teeth, but clearly the object of some very comprehensive dental care, thought Dirk Graply, world-famous womanizer, tough guy, detective, and former dentist. Basil McDonnellLike a bird gliding over the surface of a Wyoming river rippled by a gentle Spring breeze, his hand passed over her stretch marks. Patty LiveranceDeanna waited for him in a deliberate pose on the sailor-striped chaise lounge of the newly-remodeled Ramada, her bustier revealing the tops of her white breasts like eggs--eggs of the slightly undercooked, hard-boiled variety, showing a nascent jiggle with her apprehensive breath, eggs that were then peeled ever-so-carefully so as not to pierce the jellied, opaque albumen and unleash the longing, viscous yolk within--yes, she lay there, oblong and waiting to be deviled.Meredith K. GrayBusiness was kinda slow at the 'If You Build It' sperm bank.Simon PetrieMaggie said they were birthmarks and they very well could be, but the three very small black moles in a horizontal line just above her right eyebrow looked like an ellipsis to some, but to others who did not know what an ellipsis was, they looked like three very small black moles in a horizontal line just above Maggie's right eyebrow.Betty Jean Murray Link to post Share on other sites
JubilantLankyLad 1,957 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 The dentist one is my favourite - I'd read that book. Maybe.The Mr B special was pretty good too. Link to post Share on other sites
Roll the Bones 74 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 Man, I get busy and finally get a chance to ketchup and what I do see a bunch of weird shit. Awesome! Link to post Share on other sites
ShakeZuma 585 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 so I mean, is the girl being held hostage or something? or was that just a joke to get people to search for the site? it's confusing! Link to post Share on other sites
Skeleton Jelly 2 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 so I mean, is the girl being held hostage or something? or was that just a joke to get people to search for the site? it's confusing!I'm suspicious of anything vb posts now. Link to post Share on other sites
vbnautilus 48 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 so I mean, is the girl being held hostage or something? or was that just a joke to get people to search for the site? it's confusing!I really don't know. I haven't searched for it yet since I'm at work. Link to post Share on other sites
ShakeZuma 585 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 I really don't know. I haven't searched for it yet since I'm at work.the one time you've got a pretty valid reason for searching through porn while at work and you don't take it. jesus christ. Link to post Share on other sites
CaneBrain 95 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 With Tony? GREAT IDEA.Ha. Nice.SJ, how could you forget Goran Ivanisevic?VB, I think helping rescue a sex slave is at least worth $500. That's the give away that it is fake. Link to post Share on other sites
Dawson Leery 12 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 Ha. Nice.SJ, how could you forget Goran Ivanisevic?VB, I think helping rescue a sex slave is at least worth $500. That's the give away that it is fake.You're just saying that because you make a lot of money Link to post Share on other sites
CaneBrain 95 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 You're just saying that because you make a lot of moneyIn five years, I am going to get to say this to you and then the shoe will be on the other foot. Link to post Share on other sites
JubilantLankyLad 1,957 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 In five years, I am going to get to say this to you and then the shoe will be on the other foot.I hope I can afford shoes in five years.Just kidding. I like being barefoot.Just kidding. Link to post Share on other sites
Sickinfo2 291 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 You guys just have to take one thing into consideration....Venice BeachIn other news, Ill be there the evening of Aug the first....or in that neighborhood, that isIll actually be around the Manhattan area but a guy like me will naturally be drawn to that area....Im planning on a few street interviews with the local characters.... otherwise known as bums/pro panhandlersThat will be the theme of this trip both in V-town and the BEACH!...Im just hoping that one of the original bills that VB posted will still be there when I arrive...And in other, other, news....The kid has a special bonus surprise for those of you crazy enough to participateHe found a webcam looking over Fremont that he plans to be in front of for his girlfriend during the trip....I figure, what the hell.... Ill crash the party as wellHeres the link.... Ill twitt when we are both in front of the entrance to the Golden Nugget ...I may be in costume Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now