HangukMiguk 8 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 Don't know how many of you remember this, but I had posted about a break up with a girl who despised the fact that I played poker, no matter how good my results were.Well, I just can't win, guys. Seriously. I met another girl. She's great, but we had never gotten on the subject of poker. I was hoping it wouldn't be a problem, but again, as with all women, I was wrong.Then, she found out that I play. She didn't even find out from me, or through a friend. She stumbled onto an internet profile I put up. On this profile, I mentioned my playing.She is not happy with this at all, and left me a message that showed her distaste in it.I want to give it a shot to try to clear this all up, but, quite frankly, every time I have, it's blown up in my face.So, it looks like we're going to have "the talk," tonight or tomorrow.So guys, in all total seriousness, what would be your best advice for explaining, without scaring the girl away?EDIT: Check page 14 for updates Link to post Share on other sites
76clubs 0 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 Don't know how many of you remember this, but I had posted about a break up with a girl who despised the fact that I played poker, no matter how good my results were.Well, I just can't win, guys. Seriously. I met another girl. She's great, but we had never gotten on the subject of poker. I was hoping it wouldn't be a problem, but again, as with all women, I was wrong.Then, she found out that I play. She didn't even find out from me, or through a friend. She stumbled onto an internet profile I put up. On this profile, I mentioned my playing.She is not happy with this at all, and left me a message that showed her distaste in it.I want to give it a shot to try to clear this all up, but, quite frankly, every time I have, it's blown up in my face.So, it looks like we're going to have "the talk," tonight or tomorrow.So guys, in all total seriousness, what would be your best advice for explaining, without scaring the girl away?tell her how much you make and buy her shit Link to post Share on other sites
HangukMiguk 8 Posted January 11, 2006 Author Share Posted January 11, 2006 tell her how much you make and buy her censoredtried that with someone else!didn't work...maybe if a chick's a golddigger...but not in my instances Link to post Share on other sites
Suited_Up 2 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 It's probably hopeless.Move on before you get too attached.and next time, tell them up front, it's nothing to be ashamed of. Link to post Share on other sites
Stealth Beagle 0 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 Honestly, if a girl that I just recently started dating called me up and left a negative message about my playing poker, without even asking or discussing it first, I'd probably just break up with her right away. What's the point? You love the game, you're not going to quit playing, are you? Get it over with, short and sweet. Option two is attempt to have a rational discussion about it but that sounds highly unlikely, as it seems her mind is already made up. Easy fold. Link to post Share on other sites
SFkid 0 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 It is a tough spot to be in. A lot of people have a misconception about poker and put it in the same catergory as playing the lottery or the slots. You should just explain to her what you do. Be concise and and explain that you arent just gambling recklessly. Just let her know that she doesnt have to be apart of it or like, but to just be understanding of what you do. Having a girlfriend that understands is very hard to find. Good luck with her. Link to post Share on other sites
Jdr999 0 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 If playing poker won't affect when and what you can do with her, tell her.If it does, you are screwed. Link to post Share on other sites
HangukMiguk 8 Posted January 11, 2006 Author Share Posted January 11, 2006 Honestly, if a girl that I just recently started dating called me up and left a negative message about my playing poker, without even asking or discussing it first, I'd probably just break up with her right away. What's the point?It was negative yes, but it wasn't like it was she attacked me. So, I think there's still chance of a discussion being made out of it. Which is why I still want to give it a shot. Link to post Share on other sites
CoolHandLaw 0 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 Seriously..its her problem. If she can't understand it, then she's got to learn to live with it.My gf is a social worker who works with gambling addicts (among other types of addicts) and she's cool with me playing poker. If she can understand that I enjoy playing poker and still be cool with it, then you can find a girl too my man. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 Don't know how many of you remember this, but I had posted about a break up with a girl who despised the fact that I played poker, no matter how good my results were.Well, I just can't win, guys. Seriously. I met another girl. She's great, but we had never gotten on the subject of poker. I was hoping it wouldn't be a problem, but again, as with all women, I was wrong.Then, she found out that I play. She didn't even find out from me, or through a friend. She stumbled onto an internet profile I put up. On this profile, I mentioned my playing.She is not happy with this at all, and left me a message that showed her distaste in it.I want to give it a shot to try to clear this all up, but, quite frankly, every time I have, it's blown up in my face.So, it looks like we're going to have "the talk," tonight or tomorrow.So guys, in all total seriousness, what would be your best advice for explaining, without scaring the girl away?here's what I think, She may see poker as a gambling addiction, nothing more.If a person understands that it's a game of skill and not pure luck, and "if" she is a great girl like you say, then it shouldnt be an issue.I also think if you explain to her what poker is all about,(and she's interested) you could show her how to play, play and get her to watch,maybe show her some proof that it's not a "luck fest".Most people shy away from what they dont understand, if she likes you, she should be willing to understand what you are doing.If she is unwilling to listen , then she may not be as "great" as you think.Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
PotDragon 0 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 Easy fold. Why was it even a secret ? Link to post Share on other sites
Vidgames 0 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 It is a tough spot to be in. A lot of people have a misconception about poker and put it in the same catergory as playing the lottery or the slots. You should just explain to her what you do. Be concise and and explain that you arent just gambling recklessly. Just let her know that she doesnt have to be apart of it or like, but to just be understanding of what you do. Having a girlfriend that understands is very hard to find. Good luck with her.That's pretty much what I was going to say to him.Additionally, I'd start by asking why it bothers her, on the hopes that she'll think it's a sure losing situation or that she'll end up getting her legs broken by someone named Guido. If she's reasonable (and you're reasonable that poker isn't taking up too high a percentage of your time, unless you've made it a career), she'll take your explanation for it and give it a chance.If you play a lot of poker and/or lose a lot of money (or even take wild swings), you and this girl are probably doomed, because you'll never convince her it's not going to turn out bad. If you look like you've intentionally kept it from her, you're probably doomed also, unless you can explain to her that it was only because you didn't want to ruin the great thing that you had going, as happened before (but be sure you tell her that she's a greater great thing than the last one). However, maybe she'll also be open to you teaching her the game, and it can be something you do together. You know, taking money from fishies...but not colluding...no, no, that'd be a bad thing. :wink: A E Link to post Share on other sites
HoosierAlum 0 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 It's probably hopeless.Move on before you get too attached.and next time, tell them up front, it's nothing to be ashamed of. Link to post Share on other sites
GWCGWC 83 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 LIEorTell her you've known that harsh mistress pooka much longer than you've known her. Then go on to tell her that you love her so much that you are willing to give up on your dream of TP/MM. This may leave you a hollow shell of a man that you were before. Explain that you may end up resenting her forever, but if she's willing to take that risk, you are willing to give it up.And then LIE.orExplain that it's what you do. Take it or leave it. It's who you are. orLIE Link to post Share on other sites
HangukMiguk 8 Posted January 11, 2006 Author Share Posted January 11, 2006 Easy fold. Why was it even a secret ?Don't ask, don't tell. Link to post Share on other sites
handsfactor 0 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 Hear her out and see what she has to say, if she makes a valid point give up the game forever!!!Seriously though, If she can take a joke, tell her that she's not allowed to buy shoes or handbags because she has plenty, and see what she says. Then explain to her that playing poker to you is what shopping is to her. Link to post Share on other sites
justblaze 0 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 If playing poker won't affect when and what you can do with her, tell her.If it does, you are screwed.thats bullsh*t. my girlfriend gave me the whole 'poker takes up too much time' scenario. so i showed her my profit/hr over the last 6 months, then we worked out how many hours a day i would have to work at a real job making 12$/hr (im a student and am fairly unqualified for any decently-paying jobs). lets just say there arent enough hours in a day. Link to post Share on other sites
Egarim 0 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 Explain to her how you don't gamble. You're an "investor". Give an example. i.e. Poker is like betting $2 on a coinflip where everytime it's heads you get payed $3. etc.Show her examples of successful poker players. i.e. DN, etc. Not players like Matusow ^_-.If she doesn't comply, learn from Rounders and kick that girl to the curb early and save yourself the trouble. But, if you really like her, then give up poker. Link to post Share on other sites
SuperJon 175 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 Show her your weeny and say, "Hey baby, check out this nut straight!!"Like buttah Link to post Share on other sites
JBradburn6 0 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 Is she also from Noblesville? If so, move on. I'm just serious. JB Link to post Share on other sites
Jordan 1 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 tell her to stop being a p u ss y.- Jordan Link to post Share on other sites
HangukMiguk 8 Posted January 11, 2006 Author Share Posted January 11, 2006 Is she also from Noblesville? If so, move on. I'm just serious. JB you carmel people know your junk, for real.no, i don't make that ridiculous mistake Link to post Share on other sites
tryptout 0 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 I don't get it. Why to chicks get their panties in a knot about poker?I'm assuming you didn't tell her up front because it either didn't come up, or you didn't think it was necessary, not because you were trying to hide anything. Since it has come up, there's nothing left to do but tell her it's an activity you enjoy, the way some people enjoy bowling or basketball. That sounds better than explaining it in terms of money (presuming its not a primary source of income for you). Assure her that you're not a compulsive gambler, and if she can't deal, she's just not accepting you and that's too bad. Fold. Move on to the next hand. Er. Something like that. Link to post Share on other sites
phlegm 6 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 My wife Yes My dog Maybe My gun Never Link to post Share on other sites
GoStags92 0 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 If playing poker won't affect when and what you can do with her, tell her.If it does, you are screwed.I agree. I think it's good to share with her your approach to the game and let her know that it is not an addiction (I assume). Most importantly, let her know that the game won't have any affect on your relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
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