you know you're playing a fish when he says...

[MyPlayIsRAB 0]

Everyone at this table in my 6max mtt has been going at my mom for the past half hr or so. It's really great entertainment.

fyp/qfmft

[XXEddie 0]

I was just going to say that it was an obvious miss-click, or miss-read of the board....but then I checked his Sharkscope stats.

I lol'd... must have been a misclick, but still, that's friekin hilarious.

i would agree...but on the last hand when got it allin preflop my 66 v his AJ. My 6s held up and he went off how much bs it was

[James D 0]

i would agree...but on the last hand when got it allin preflop my 66 v his AJ. My 6s held up and he went off how much bs it was

Maybe he'll start his own thread here, ala ZeeJustin, and say that it was for 'metagame image purposes'.

[NOFX_PUNK 0]

PIcks up his cards, sighs, covers his face and says 'all in' (BB is 50, he has 3000). Everyone folds and takes the piss, he turns over an y hand between 22 and 77 and says, 'I hate low pairs, I'm either all in or all out.'

[kmak 0]

PokerStars Game #7148922514: Tournament #36540737, $10.00+$0.50 Hold'em No Limit - Match Round I, Level II (15/30) - 2006/11/23 - 22:55:11 (ET)Table '36540737 1' 2-max Seat #2 is the buttonSeat 1: KevinJA8 (1435 in chips) Seat 2: atmsmcse (1565 in chips) atmsmcse: posts small blind 15KevinJA8: posts big blind 30*** HOLE CARDS ***Dealt to KevinJA8 [3c 6s]atmsmcse: calls 15KevinJA8: checks *** FLOP *** [Qd 4h Js]KevinJA8: checks atmsmcse: checks *** TURN *** [Qd 4h Js] [5h]KevinJA8: bets 60atmsmcse: calls 60*** RIVER *** [Qd 4h Js 5h] [9s]KevinJA8: bets 130atmsmcse: calls 130*** SHOW DOWN ***KevinJA8: shows [3c 6s] (high card Queen)atmsmcse: mucks hand KevinJA8 collected 440 from pot*** SUMMARY ***Total pot 440 | Rake 0 Board [Qd 4h Js 5h 9s]Seat 1: KevinJA8 (big blind) showed [3c 6s] and won (440) with high card QueenSeat 2: atmsmcse (button) (small blind) mucked [2d 3d]it was an instacall too

ok, but what did the fish SAY???

[Actuary 3]

ok, but what did the fish SAY???

my thoughts precisely***********************

'I hate low pairs, I'm either all in or all out.'

not much of a post flop player, apparently. that is a good one

[Flack_attack 0]

Dealer: WildAce8, it's your turn. You have 10 seconds to actDealer: WildAce8 has two pair, Jacks and EightsDealer: CasinoRed has three of a kind, EightsDealer: Game #7155840077: CasinoRed wins Hi pot (9836) with three of a kind, EightsDealer: Game #7155840077: There is no low handDealer: WildAce8, it's your turn. You have 10 seconds to actWildAce8: i had a stDealer: Game #7155848357: HKV0501 wins pot (750)CasinoRed: how did 3 8s win then?WildAce8: beats meWildAce8: computer error

[smallwd 0]

Playing in NLHE tournament in a local casino. Blinds are 300/600 I'm BB with 6s 5c. UTG is short stack with 800 and pushes. Everyone folds to me and I call. UTG flips pocket aces. He looks at my cards and says "How can you call with that trash?" I say "What do you mean? It's 200 more into a 1700 pot." He replies "It was obvious I had aces!"

[XXEddie 0]

ok, but what did the fish SAY???

nothing there but when my 66 held up against his his AJ he claimed it was total bullshit

[Flushgarden 0]

Fish talking to a friend who is an observer..."when you're folding the best hand a lot it means means you're playing good poker."At the final table of a 4.40 180 SNG...Fish #1: I just folded an A (to a preflop raise)Fish #2: I folded 4 or 5 As in this tourney...a lot more than normal.

[stopsayingfrankly 0]

BUT HOW MUCH DID U LOSE?!?!

[Flushgarden 0]

danny2271: checks (Me)durmax01: bets 1170deeboallyomo: calls 1140 and is all-indanny2271: raises 30 to 1200 and is all-indurmax01: folds Right now my chat is banned on stars...so I couldnt ask him what he was thinking. lol

[coesillian 0]

Fish talking to a friend who is an observer..."when you're folding the best hand a lot it means means you're playing good poker."At the final table of a 4.40 180 SNG...Fish #1: I just folded an A (to a preflop raise)Fish #2: I folded 4 or 5 As in this tourney...a lot more than normal.

Yes, I like, wawaweewa.

[offset 0]

I have one from a few months ago. Playing 3 handed in a $12 6 handed sng I called a small all in with 67. I said "I had a feeling I would get lucky."The small blind, who did not play the hand and said "rigged" everytime he lost a hand then asked me "WTF? Are you an amatuer?"No, I'm a pro who plays $12 Sit n Goes.

[NosotrosUSA 0]

i THINK YOU HAVE KK

[rayovac 0]

This was another gem at motor city in detroit."Holy ****ing **** **** you f.ucking prick you called all your money with nothing but a straight draw? You ****in roob. Three of a kind!! BOO YAH!" - Him"I have the nut flush, and a gutter royal draw." - MeHe stares for a minute, then after he is losing and walks away."God dammit i fcuking hate damn cards always get outdrawn by ****ing magician dealers swapping cards so shills can win."

[XXEddie 0]

This was another gem at motor city in detroit."Holy ****ing **** **** you f.ucking prick you called all your money with nothing but a straight draw? You ****in roob. Three of a kind!! BOO YAH!" - Him"I have the nut flush, and a gutter royal draw." - MeHe stares for a minute, then after he is losing and walks away."God dammit i fcuking hate damn cards always get outdrawn by ****ing magician dealers swapping cards so shills can win."

magician dealers, lolinsta-classic

[coesillian 0]

Tulsa called all in and hit a gutshot on the river Dealer: Tulsaaa has a straight, Ten to AceDealer: PUTZ0303 has two pair, Kings and JacksDealer: Game #7194037741: Tulsaaa wins pot (4600) with a straight, Ten to AcePUTZ0303: niceTulsaaa: tyDealer: ShyHeart, it's your turn. You have 15 seconds to actTulsaaa: lucky againPUTZ0303: i thought i had that oneTulsaaa: me too

[onlyme386 0]

PokerStars Game #7208744979: Tournament #36854118, $5.00+$0.50 Hold'em No Limit - Level V (75/150) - 2006/11/28 - 04:13:40 (ET) Table '36854118 1' 9-max Seat #4 is the button Seat 3: stoofer (965 in chips) Seat 4: Red^Rev (1215 in chips) Seat 5: onlyme386 (2865 in chips) Seat 9: J Dubb0104 (8455 in chips) onlyme386: posts small blind 75 J Dubb0104: posts big blind 150 *** HOLE CARDS *** Dealt to onlyme386 [Kc Ah] onlyme386 said, "i'll push you around all day" onlyme386 said, "*****" stoofer: raises 815 to 965 and is all-in Red^Rev: folds onlyme386: raises 1900 to 2865 and is all-in J Dubb0104: calls 2715 *** FLOP *** [7c 2d 5c] *** TURN *** [7c 2d 5c] [Ad] *** RIVER *** [7c 2d 5c Ad] [Qs] *** SHOW DOWN *** onlyme386: shows [Kc Ah] (a pair of Aces) J Dubb0104: shows [8s 9s] (high card Ace) onlyme386 collected 3800 from side pot stoofer: shows [Ks Jh] (high card Ace) onlyme386 collected 2895 from main pot onlyme386 said, "GREAT call that time, thanks for the donation" J Dubb0104 said, "wow big man" *** SUMMARY *** Total pot 6695 Main pot 2895. Side pot 3800. | Rake 0 Board [7c 2d 5c Ad Qs] Seat 3: stoofer showed [Ks Jh] and lost with high card Ace Seat 4: Red^Rev (button) folded before Flop (didn't bet) Seat 5: onlyme386 (small blind) showed [Kc Ah] and won (6695) with a pair of Aces Seat 9: J Dubb0104 (big blind) showed [8s 9s] and lost with high card Ace been talking mad **** to this guy all tourney, leading to this

[XXEddie 0]

"There is no such thing as a weak Ace"

[Wandigo 1]

After re-stealing on the bb from a button raise deep in this $33 mtt"next time for sure buddy""i don't care what u have""u been doing that way too much""u gave me the second worst beat i have ever had" (don't even know what he's referring to)"i am about sick of your crap"This was said after the 3rd time I showed him AQ.

[XXEddie 0]

After re-stealing on the bb from a button raise deep in this $33 mtt"next time for sure buddy""i don't care what u have""u been doing that way too much""u gave me the second worst beat i have ever had" (don't even know what he's referring to)"i am about sick of your crap"This was said after the 3rd time I showed him AQ.

similar thing happened to me on the bubble of a STTguy kept raising like every other hand, and every button and I raised allin a few times"Next time you do that, youre going out on the bubble"He raised agagin, I pushed with AQ he called with JT and flopped a str8Him-"Told ya, you shouldnt of done that"....yeah, i should really fold AQ 4-handed to a button raise....

[rayovac 0]

LOL@that.I saw a young college kid in a 1/2 NL game one time, kept raising to $6. He also is the type of player that if someone raised to like $10, hed push for like his whole stack. Anyways, he went bust like 3 times for $200 and I was talking to him later at the bar, and I swear, this was an exact quote.me - "sucks man, you played good today, just this 1/2 game is crazy in terms of people calling preflop, you gotta learn more postflop play if you wanna beat this game."him - "yeah, all the forums and books say that its all about postflop play, but they're full of ****. Everyone knows NL is about ALL IN. That's why everyone really plays no limit, so they can go allin. Thats why i only raise to $6 preflop. I want someone to reraise me, so I can go ALL IN just like on TV".He bought another drink, I convinced him to play again, and we sat down, and I busted him the 3rd hand with my AA versus J3.Lolers

[Zeatrix 0]

A guy has been harrassing the table for well over an hour, typing lol everytime he wins a hand and then goes on to berate the losing player. This is a 5-handed game and one hand he raises PF with A8s, completely misses the flop but still calls a bet after a raise and a call. He ends up hitting a runner runner straight with 4 cards to the straight on board. As it turned out, he only had perfect perfect as outs.Me (fed up with him once again typing lol) - Nice call on the flop with only runner runner as a way to winHim - lol, you are so clueless, the pot was so big I had to call.

[addagirl 0]

This thread is great!I find that agreeing with the mouths is usually the fastest way to shut them up. Here is one brief exchange between me and another player after I called his bluffs with a very poor hand;Him: you are a total donkMe: yes I amHim: you whoreMe: Yes and a high priced one. You couldn't afford meAnother time I ran into a similar situation where a guy just wouldn't stop complaining even though I kept agreeing with him that I was a horrible player so I finally said: After someone admits to playing poorly is when the whinning is supposed to stop. I don't give refunds. That shut him up!But the best comeback line I've ever enjoyed is when someone said back to another player who was complaining "shhhhh Im counting your chips"