Jump to content

I Called In Sick Today


Recommended Posts

so what would you do with 272 million bucks? also, you'd be pretty stupid not to buy a ticket, right? since this is one of the only times in history the full after tax cash option is higher than the odds.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Replies 268k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

  • Ron_Mexico

    19414

  • speedz99

    16304

  • Napa Lite

    7767

  • ShakeZuma

    7517

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Posts

and after 3 days, he is risen!

If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

Pocket change cost me my first and only black girlfriend.   It was in the middle of a roaring poker boom and I was flush in ways most men don't even bother dreaming of. Money, it was like dirt to me

Posted Images

so what would you do with 272 million bucks? also, you'd be pretty stupid not to buy a ticket, right? since this is one of the only times in history the full after tax cash option is higher than the odds.
6 hour massages every day, by 6 different women at the same time.one on each foot and hands, one for the back and one for my head.pretty sure that would keep me busy for a few months.
Link to post
Share on other sites

I tell ya what I'd do... I'd smother myself with brown mustard and relish... wait, that's not right. I would definitely be going to vegas first. if I survived that, it'd be off to hawaii. then who knows.

Link to post
Share on other sites
I tell ya what I'd do... I'd smother myself with brown mustard and relish... wait, that's not right. I would definitely be going to vegas first. if I survived that, it'd be off to hawaii. then who knows.
That's why they call you whiskers!
Link to post
Share on other sites
Yeah, I had a girl like this before. That didn't sound right. Anyway, she was great and we had been out for drinks (you know, in group settings) a bunch of times and it was driving me crazy. Then they had a big fight and she moved out and was staying with her mom and I swooped in and just happened to have a couple of tickets to a sporting event of the local professional franchise and I made my move and found out they "weren't that broken up yet."
it would be torture if I had to stay in this job. I miss being able to go home, drink a beer or two, watch/read random stuff, and never once think, "man, I wish I had somewhere to be tonight."
Link to post
Share on other sites
I grabbed the bag and bags for a weekend
In addition to the others mentioned, I enjoyed this.
Link to post
Share on other sites

As for the lottery win. I would buy a large sailboat and take off. I'm not sure how many years it would be before I came back to land.

Link to post
Share on other sites

OH, and the god damned steering column thing on my lawn mower just broke AGAIN. what was it, two years ago that I fixed it the first time? I guess I'm just not cut out to be beans. damn sure better win this lottery.

Link to post
Share on other sites
my mom comes in asking me to go pick up dinner. I sigh heavily and look at the empty beer bottles on my desk, then back at her. she just nods and walks off angrily. I'm a bad son.
I think this post needs a re-imagining with beans and his son.
Link to post
Share on other sites

that night was f'ing awesome. zimmer had some story about crushing some NL game when he was pre-21 and having to fold a winner because the other person in the hand was like, "I will have you carded if you win this pot." basically just ate barbeque, played cornhole, drank a bunch of beers, then went to some ridic rooftop hippy fire-dancing party.

Link to post
Share on other sites
my mom comes in asking me to go pick up dinner. I sigh heavily and look at the empty beer bottles on my desk, then back at her. she just nods and walks off angrily. I'm a bad son.
I think this post needs a re-imagining with beans and his son.
Beans Version:[wife enters, and sees Beans buried in beer bottles and used limes]Wife: Go get supperBeans: okthe end.
Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

Announcements


×
×
  • Create New...