CardWarfare 4 Posted March 13, 2007 Share Posted March 13, 2007 I recently discovered that I'm pregnant. It's come as quite a shock to me, and I'm not really ready. My partner and I aren't married, but we're keeping it anyway. The question I have for all of you that have maybe been there before just have some second hand knowledge is this: Will the baby give off any tells from the womb? When I get worked up or excited I have noticed that he starts kicking and moving around. Will other players be able to tell? Also, I like to have a few drinks and smokes while I play to keep me loose. How bad is that exactly? For the men out there: I used to use my appearance as a way to influence men into making bad decisions at the table. Will they still find me sexy with my huge belly? Thanks for the help guys! Link to post Share on other sites
JesseW316 0 Posted March 13, 2007 Share Posted March 13, 2007 I recently discovered that I'm pregnant. It's come as quite a shock to me, and I'm not really ready. My partner and I aren't married, but we're keeping it anyway. The question I have for all of you that have maybe been there before just have some second hand knowledge is this: Will the baby give off any tells from the womb? When I get worked up or excited I have noticed that he starts kicking and moving around. Will other players be able to tell? Also, I like to have a few drinks and smokes while I play to keep me loose. How bad is that exactly? For the men out there: I used to use my appearance as a way to influence men into making bad decisions at the table. Will they still find me sexy with my huge belly? Thanks for the help guys!Def hopin this is a jokelol, ya Link to post Share on other sites
llou 0 Posted March 13, 2007 Share Posted March 13, 2007 Def hopin this is a jokelol, yaMe too. I hate to think of people that stupid reproducing ... but I know it happens. Link to post Share on other sites
CardWarfare 4 Posted March 13, 2007 Author Share Posted March 13, 2007 Def hopin this is a jokelol, yaNow is not the time to fuck with me. My feet are swollen, and I'm hornier than a rabbit on speed so just help me out and answer my questions or I will crush you with my ever increasingly huge breasts. Link to post Share on other sites
Nikki_N 17 Posted March 13, 2007 Share Posted March 13, 2007 The drinks should make the baby sleepy and the smokes should limit the oxygen supply in little Warfare Jr's blood stream. This should counteract the kicking and tells when you get excited and your heart rate rises. As for the swelling, make sure you take regular breaks and walk around. Maybe take a stroll outside and smoke a doobie. The getting up periodically will also help to ease the pressure on your bottom that could give you raging hemmorhoids.The horniness can be alleviated with regular use of a hitachi magic wand.Oh and whatever you do, don't dye your hair or eat salmon. Those things can harm the fetus. Link to post Share on other sites
CardWarfare 4 Posted March 13, 2007 Author Share Posted March 13, 2007 The drinks should make the baby sleepy and the smokes should limit the oxygen supply in little Warfare Jr's blood stream. This should counteract the kicking and tells when you get excited and your heart rate rises. As for the swelling, make sure you take regular breaks and walk around. Maybe take a stroll outside and smoke a doobie. The getting up periodically will also help to ease the pressure on your bottom that could give you raging hemmorhoids.The horniness can be cured with a hitachi magic wand.Excellent. Thank you so much. You're very good. Link to post Share on other sites
JesseW316 0 Posted March 13, 2007 Share Posted March 13, 2007 The drinks should make the baby sleepy and the smokes should limit the oxygen supply in little Warfare Jr's blood stream. This should counteract the kicking and tells when you get excited and your heart rate rises. As for the swelling, make sure you take regular breaks and walk around. Maybe take a stroll outside and smoke a doobie. The getting up periodically will also help to ease the pressure on your bottom that could give you raging hemmorhoids.The horniness can be alleviated with regular use of a hitachi magic wand. ok I say we discuss that comment Link to post Share on other sites
Nikki_N 17 Posted March 13, 2007 Share Posted March 13, 2007 ok I say we discuss that commentThey sell them on ebay. They are "massagers". They plug into the wall. Vroom vroom. Link to post Share on other sites
GeneralGeeWhiz 0 Posted March 13, 2007 Share Posted March 13, 2007 LOL Link to post Share on other sites
StuNami 0 Posted March 13, 2007 Share Posted March 13, 2007 The drinks should make the baby a candidate for fetal alcohol syndrome and the smokes should limit the oxygen supply in little Warfare Jr's blood stream stunting his development, especially his brain mass. This should counteract the kicking and tells when you get excited and your heart rate rises because you will be slowly killing your baby. As for the swelling, make sure you take regular breaks and walk around. Maybe take a stroll outside and smoke a doobie to increase the negative brain function/growth of Cletus the fetus. The getting up periodically will also help to ease the pressure on your bottom that could give you raging hemmorhoids.The horniness can be alleviated with regular use of a hitachi magic wand.Oh and whatever you do, don't dye your hair or eat salmon. Those things can harm the fetus.FYP only becasue I missed the "sw" in the original and there was an earlier post calling this young "lady's" IQ into question. You need to take these tells generated by the young 'un and turn them into the 9-month side show that pregnancy can become. Baby kicks, make the already uncomfortable at the table put their clammy hands on your bare belly to "feel" the kick, catch a peek at their cards, steal a chip or two . . . you get the picture. Just remember, it is all a diversionary tactic by women to take our minds off of the nutz and the nuts. Link to post Share on other sites
Nikki_N 17 Posted March 13, 2007 Share Posted March 13, 2007 Did my advice really need a sw??? Well, here it is: SW on my advice post in this thread. Link to post Share on other sites
Chris E 0 Posted March 13, 2007 Share Posted March 13, 2007 The drinks should make the baby sleepy and the smokes should limit the oxygen supply in little Warfare Jr's blood stream.If she's looking to kill the baby I'm sure there are easier and quicker ways, a coathanger for example. Link to post Share on other sites
logic411 0 Posted March 13, 2007 Share Posted March 13, 2007 I recently discovered that I'm pregnant. It's come as quite a shock to me, and I'm not really ready. My partner and I aren't married, but we're keeping it anyway. The question I have for all of you that have maybe been there before just have some second hand knowledge is this: Will the baby give off any tells from the womb? When I get worked up or excited I have noticed that he starts kicking and moving around. Will other players be able to tell? Also, I like to have a few drinks and smokes while I play to keep me loose. How bad is that exactly? For the men out there: I used to use my appearance as a way to influence men into making bad decisions at the table. Will they still find me sexy with my huge belly? Thanks for the help guys!Is it just me or does the pic indicate jan 3 of 06?? wouldn't you of had the baby already? LOL Link to post Share on other sites
GrinderMJ 0 Posted March 13, 2007 Share Posted March 13, 2007 Oh for christ's sake people, Cardwarfare is a guy. Link to post Share on other sites
Nikki_N 17 Posted March 13, 2007 Share Posted March 13, 2007 Wow, how many people in here think MR. Cardwarfare is serious? Link to post Share on other sites
Chris E 0 Posted March 13, 2007 Share Posted March 13, 2007 This thread is disturbing. Link to post Share on other sites
chgocubs99 0 Posted March 13, 2007 Share Posted March 13, 2007 Wow, how many people in here think MR. Cardwarfare is serious?Well, when you generalers bring your inside jokes here, people who don't go anywhere else may not know what the hell is going on. Hell, I barely did...though this one was pretty obviously a joke. Link to post Share on other sites
CardWarfare 4 Posted March 13, 2007 Author Share Posted March 13, 2007 Did my advice really need a sw??? Well, here it is: SW on my advice post in this thread.Bitch.Oh for christ's sake people, Cardwarfare is a guy.Yeah, and? Link to post Share on other sites
CardWarfare 4 Posted March 13, 2007 Author Share Posted March 13, 2007 Is it just me or does the pic indicate jan 3 of 06?? wouldn't you of had the baby already? LOLDaylight savings time messes everything up. Link to post Share on other sites
JoeyFinngars 0 Posted March 13, 2007 Share Posted March 13, 2007 All the best for you and your baby... Link to post Share on other sites
Erasa 0 Posted March 13, 2007 Share Posted March 13, 2007 I could be wrong, but ..... if this is your wife/girlfriend/grade school teacher/mother then maybe you shouldn't have posted the picture. It looks like her name is Kelly with her SSN listed on the top of the picture. Amazing what people can do now a days with a SSN.Otherwise good joke...RegardsErasa Link to post Share on other sites
timwakefield 68 Posted March 13, 2007 Share Posted March 13, 2007 Oh for christ's sake people, Cardwarfare is a guy.So? It happens. Link to post Share on other sites
mtdesmoines 3 Posted March 13, 2007 Share Posted March 13, 2007 Oh for christ's sake people, Cardwarfare WAS a guy.FYP Link to post Share on other sites
finztotheleft 0 Posted March 13, 2007 Share Posted March 13, 2007 Oh for christ's sake people, Cardwarfare is a guy.Thanks, but I think we knew that.If anyone was unsure.......no pregnant woman says, "We decided to keep IT anyway", if you've just figured out that you are pregnant and already have swollen ankles you haven't been keeping close track of your periods, and the 14 month old ultrasound might have been dead giveaways. Link to post Share on other sites
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