ChrisRichey 1 Posted January 28, 2007 Share Posted January 28, 2007 GG life. Link to post Share on other sites
timwakefield 68 Posted January 28, 2007 Share Posted January 28, 2007 Not to jump the gun, but she's totally not pregnant. Her only symptoms are that she FEELS pregnant? She's not even late? Oh man, tell her to chill out and save the fear for when she's actually late. God if my HS girlfriend had freaked out everytime she got moody and hungry, she woulda been pregnant like twice a week. Also, JJJ that was the awesomest post of the year. Link to post Share on other sites
XXEddie 0 Posted January 28, 2007 Author Share Posted January 28, 2007 so we got one of the EPT(error proff tests) and the directions stated if you take it more than 5 days before your period(which should be missed) then it may give you a false negativegreat Link to post Share on other sites
CardWarfare 4 Posted January 28, 2007 Share Posted January 28, 2007 Put it in the pooper next time man...I actually was friends with a guy in high school, who dated a girl who was really paranoid about getting pregnant, so for about 6 months they only did anal. It wasn't until after that, when she went on the pill, that he actually stuck it in the vagine.God there is no worse feeling when you are young. uggghQFT. I had a scare like this in high school, and it is not pleasant. We actually were on a school trip during the majority of the scare, and I was so distracted and nervous we didn't even get to take advantage of the fact that we had my room all to ourselves for a few hours each night. Oh well. She wound up lying to me, telling me she got her period, I told her I knew she was lying, and she started crying hysterically. That felt great, since she made it seem like she was hiding something and knew something I didn't. Eventually, she got her period, about a month and a half late, since she had some other issues and wasn't regular. Not a fun experience. I'm still paying child support.I'm not sure if I want to marry you, adopt you, have you adopt me, or just kidnap you and keep you chained up in my basement with a ball gag in your mouth, a black leather banana hammock on your package, a spiked collar around your neck, high heeled boots, and nipple tassels.Or I could buy you a beer or something sometime. You know, whatever you're more comfortable with.That's why I keep the sperm every time I ejacualte. Honestly, some day when I make enough money I'm going to have them all turned into children. That's only a few billion or so. Anyone know where I can get several billion eggs?Wait, every month women just give up eggs. If I can find a way to get all of those, I can turn all of my little human beings into actual human beings. I mean, it'll take a lot of time to do, but it's better than just letting them die in a tissue. These are human beings we're talking about here.I think it was because I wasn't expecting it, but this was pretty goddamned rugged. Link to post Share on other sites
SweetDaddyFreak 0 Posted January 28, 2007 Share Posted January 28, 2007 I had a scare a couple years back, you know when I was actually getting laid on the weekends. It was the worst feeling in the world, I had no one to turn too and felt terrible. Now looking back its kinda ironic how the times girls want you to be extra careful because they didn't take their pill, you end up doing the opposite.But it is to argue, what is the better feeling: Girl telling you she's not pregnant or doctor telling you that your HIV test came up negative? Link to post Share on other sites
XXEddie 0 Posted January 28, 2007 Author Share Posted January 28, 2007 I had a scare a couple years back, you know when I was actually getting laid on the weekends. It was the worst feeling in the world, I had no one to turn too and felt terrible. Now looking back its kinda ironic how the times girls want you to be extra careful because they didn't take their pill, you end up doing the opposite.But it is to argue, what is the better feeling: Girl telling you she's not pregnant or doctor telling you that your HIV test came up negative?being told you dont have an HIV, AINEC Link to post Share on other sites
tskillz187 0 Posted January 28, 2007 Share Posted January 28, 2007 I'm just making sense.FYP Link to post Share on other sites
SuperJon 175 Posted January 28, 2007 Share Posted January 28, 2007 I see you, SuperJon. You'd better follow my advice, too. I know whereof I speak. I was teenage slut and never once got preggo on accident.Of course. The chick I knocked up had the abortion, so all is well for now. Condoms and all that other groovy shit has now become a regular part of my not so regular sex life. Link to post Share on other sites
ShakeZuma 585 Posted January 28, 2007 Share Posted January 28, 2007 Of course. The chick I knocked up had the abortion, so all is well for now. Condoms and all that other groovy shit has now become a regular part of my not so regular sex life.yeah I actually bought some condoms last night for the first time in a long time. dodged bullets here so far, better not tempt fate. funny situation though. you know its always a little uncomfortable for both parties (customer and clerk) when you're buying condoms? well, I bought mine at a gas station along with a big energy drink from some young fairly attractive clerk. It took everything I had not to look at her and tell her "gonna be a long night." had to be there I guess, but it was really funny in my head. Link to post Share on other sites
SuperJon 175 Posted January 28, 2007 Share Posted January 28, 2007 yeah I actually bought some condoms last night for the first time in a long time. dodged bullets here so far, better not tempt fate. funny situation though. you know its always a little uncomfortable for both parties (customer and clerk) when you're buying condoms? well, I bought mine at a gas station along with a big energy drink from some young fairly attractive clerk. It took everything I had not to look at her and tell her "gonna be a long night." had to be there I guess, but it was really funny in my head.It's pretty funny in my head too. Link to post Share on other sites
Shizant 0 Posted January 28, 2007 Share Posted January 28, 2007 When all else fails.....Go with the Hail Mary!Listen and learn.http://podcast.1069freefm.com/kifr1/51518.mp3Second caller. Link to post Share on other sites
LongLiveYorke 38 Posted January 28, 2007 Share Posted January 28, 2007 It took everything I had not to look at her and tell her "gonna be a long night."LOLers Link to post Share on other sites
CardWarfare 4 Posted January 28, 2007 Share Posted January 28, 2007 yeah I actually bought some condoms last night for the first time in a long time. dodged bullets here so far, better not tempt fate. funny situation though. you know its always a little uncomfortable for both parties (customer and clerk) when you're buying condoms? well, I bought mine at a gas station along with a big energy drink from some young fairly attractive clerk. It took everything I had not to look at her and tell her "gonna be a long night." had to be there I guess, but it was really funny in my head.If you had actually done this, it would've been a disappointment unless you made several hip-thrusts while nodding your head emphatically in an "Ohhhh yeah" kind of way. Link to post Share on other sites
LongLiveYorke 38 Posted January 28, 2007 Share Posted January 28, 2007 If you had actually done this, it would've been a disappointment unless you made several hip-thrusts while nodding your head emphatically in an "Ohhhh yeah" kind of way.Oh, I totally disagree. You should say it in a sort of resigned and half casual way. It's much funnier like that. Link to post Share on other sites
speedz99 145 Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 If you had actually done this, it would've been a disappointment unless you made several hip-thrusts while nodding your head emphatically in an "Ohhhh yeah" kind of way.Agreed."It's gonna be a LOOOOOOONG NIIIGHT!"side note: I said this to myself to see how funny it sounded just as my girlfriend walked in the room. That wasn't awkward at all. Link to post Share on other sites
speedz99 145 Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 Oh, I totally disagree. You should say it in a sort of resigned and half casual way. It's much funnier like that.It's akin to the difference between a good Arrested Development joke and a good Family Guy joke (when it was funny). Both work, it just depends on the delivery. Link to post Share on other sites
Nikki_N 17 Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 yeah I actually bought some condoms last night for the first time in a long time. dodged bullets here so far, better not tempt fate. funny situation though. you know its always a little uncomfortable for both parties (customer and clerk) when you're buying condoms? well, I bought mine at a gas station along with a big energy drink from some young fairly attractive clerk. It took everything I had not to look at her and tell her "gonna be a long night." had to be there I guess, but it was really funny in my head.You totally should have done this.Agreed."It's gonna be a LOOOOOOONG NIIIGHT!"side note: I said this to myself to see how funny it sounded just as my girlfriend walked in the room. That wasn't awkward at all.Bahahahahahaha! Link to post Share on other sites
socalpoker_j 1 Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 You totally should have done this.Bahahahahahaha!You remind me of my older sister... and thats a great thing... cool woman with great advice. Link to post Share on other sites
MightyLouse 0 Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 You remind me of my old sister... and thats a great thing... cool woman with great advice.This is funny. A few reasons. Is your sister 45? Are you a mistake?Did you get a new sister to replace the old one? Link to post Share on other sites
LongLiveYorke 38 Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 It's akin to the difference between a good Arrested Development joke and a good Family Guy joke (when it was funny). Both work, it just depends on the delivery.I think you're right. I always liked Arrested Development better."Even so, where'd the lighter fluid come from?" Link to post Share on other sites
speedz99 145 Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 I think you're right. I always liked Arrested Development better."Even so, where'd the lighter fluid come from?"I'm still pissed they decided not to take AD to Showtime for more seasons.I watched The Royal Tenenbaums the other day...I always forget how amazing that movie is. It's funny seeing it now and thinking it's similar to Arrested Development, when it's really the other way around. Link to post Share on other sites
socalpoker_j 1 Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 This is funny. A few reasons. Is your sister 45? Are you a mistake?Did you get a new sister to replace the old one?Nah just sounds like advice/same line of thought from my older sister. Link to post Share on other sites
MightyLouse 0 Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 "Buster threw what he thought was her favorite toy at what he thought was her car." Buster throws the Dustbuster at the maid's bus. Link to post Share on other sites
Jordan 1 Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 results?- Jordan Link to post Share on other sites
CardWarfare 4 Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 This is funny. A few reasons. Is your sister 45? Are you a mistake?Did you get a new sister to replace the old one?I are Wamptrilltastic cat. Link to post Share on other sites
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