I Called In Sick Today

[beans-n-icewater 18]

I was high too.

hi...

It is cold as shit outside again today and the temp is dropping faster than stock market and who wanders in to look at cars?

I spent the day in the garage...It didnt get above freezing here today so I decided to go out and warm up the carsFor those not into cars (everyone here) you really need to start them at least once every two weeks and make sure the water temp gets to normal (180-210) and the oil temp is 190 for an hour to burn off any condensation in the motor and exhaust system. I have been drinking Nevadas since eleven and the combination of that and exhaust fumes has me higher than renae at an army gathering.Zach opened the door and said "GEEZ DAD! I COULD SMELL THE FUMES AS SOON AS I GOT OFF THE BUS!"One of them is running a little rich, I guess...Shake, If the above isnt correct drunk typing I dont know what is

I just don't think he's funny.

[JoeyJoJo 18]

I'm just jealous because he has such a fantastic ass.

[El Guapo 8]

Am I the only one who laughed at Hannukah Harry? I'm not sure if the funniest part is the thought of a Jewish accountant named Harry being the person that gives Jews gifts at Chanukah, or that he chose an arbitrary first name for an alliteration that fit with the misspelling of the word Chanukah.

Hannukah Harry is hilarious, On Moische! On Herschel! On Schlomo!

some people in here don't like Dane Cook - is this just a "don't think he's funny" thing or is there a "he's a joke stealing hack" thing?

Dane Cook was funny, unfortuantely he kept recylcing all his jokes and keeps doing the same act. I was so dissapointed when he did SNL a few years back, that he used the same Camera joke he had used for the past couple years. He is a cliche now.

[Ron_Mexico 4,219]

Is it worth getting into if I've only seen season 1 and a handful of other episodes?

If you have the Soap channel (262 on directv) then you can catch up. I like the show for the hot p, some of the music and the cheesy story lines. I'm a sucker for that kind of stuff, and for a guy that has a Dawson's Creek alter ego, I'm guessing that it's right up your gay alley. No offense

[Ron_Mexico 4,219]

this is Dane Cook in a nutshell.

I love this

[ShakeZuma 585]

I kind of want to read the book first. Any thoughts on that?

honestly, I haven't seen the movie yet, but I would almost be that the movie is better. the book was ok, but it was kind of choppy as far as the plot line goes, and sometimes a little hard to follow. still a good book though. (I really only posted this because it was one of only a few books that I've ever read without being forced to by a class of some sort.)

some people in here don't like Dane Cook - is this just a "don't think he's funny" thing or is there a "he's a joke stealing hack" thing?

I liked him at first but after listening to more of his stuff, it just seemed to get pretty repetitive and redundant. much like my response to this question.

My other dream this morning involved me hooking up with the youngest member of Hanson, who was my first crush at age 7. Later in the dream it was still Hanson-guy, but he looked like Chad Michael Murray from One Tree Hill. It was an improvement, and I flirted shamelessly with him. Thought I'd include this detail because it would/might interest Ron Mexico.

freaky. I have the same dream all the time.

not that I'd ever open this thread, but if I did and read these posts, I'd say, "you're not panzies"

I really want you to become a regular poster in here, but to continue the whole schpiel of "not that I'd ever open this thread." like 2000 posts in, you're still saying you'd never open this thread. that would be neat.

hi...I spent the day in the garage...It didnt get above freezing here today so I decided to go out and warm up the carsFor those not into cars (everyone here) you really need to start them at least once every two weeks and make sure the water temp gets to normal (180-210) and the oil temp is 190 for an hour to burn off any condensation in the motor and exhaust system. I have been drinking Nevadas since eleven and the combination of that and exhaust fumes has me higher than renae at an army gathering.Zach opened the door and said "GEEZ DAD! I COULD SMELL THE FUMES AS SOON AS I GOT OFF THE BUS!"One of them is running a little rich, I guess...Shake, If the above isnt correct drunk typing I dont know what is

yes beans, you've done well. I am proud.

[Ouch-8s 4]

this is Dane Cook in a nutshell.

I love this

this was pretty funny.WOAH!

I liked him at first but after listening to more of his stuff, it just seemed to get pretty repetitive and redundant. much like my response to this question.

Ok, good, that's pretty much what I thought too but I want to make sure I wasn't liking the early material of a joke-stealing hack.BAM!

[Ron_Mexico 4,219]

this was pretty funny.WOAH!

thank you for acknowledging my existence

[Ouch-8s 4]

thank you for acknowledging my existence

oh, that was you? damn, you lost weight!

[speedz99 145]

I really want you to become a regular poster in here, but to continue the whole schpiel of "not that I'd ever open this thread." like 2000 posts in, you're still saying you'd never open this thread. that would be neat.

Concur.

[Napa_Don 688]

Concur.

Believe it or not I am a bit of a trendsetter in my house. Basically, I take a catchphrase and then use it ad nauseum until people start saying it themselves and then they start taking credit for it as it if it were their own idea. Many of these catchphrases come from here. The whole "i concur, do you concur, i concur if you concur" thing is one of these things. I also succesuflly got "take it, its yours", "no homo", 'the make a gun with your hand, wink, and cluck your tounge when you see somebody" thing, a recent one is somebody says " does the pope shit in the woods, followed by "does a bear wear a silly hat?"....and slowly "no offense" is taking off. I just thought I'd let you guys know that a bunch of frat guys think you guys are funny without really knowing it's you guys.Congrats. Bask in my(your) glory.

[LadyGhey 0]

Believe it or not I am a bit of a trendsetter in my house. Basically, I take a catchphrase and then use it ad nauseum until people start saying it themselves and then they start taking credit for it as it if it were their own idea. Many of these catchphrases come from here. The whole "i concur, do you concur, i concur if you concur" thing is one of these things. I also succesuflly got "take it, its yours", "no homo", 'the make a gun with your hand, wink, and cluck your tounge when you see somebody" thing, a recent one is somebody says " does the pope shit in the woods, followed by "does a bear wear a silly hat?"....and slowly "no offense" is taking off. I just thought I'd let you guys know that a bunch of frat guys think you guys are funny without really knowing it's you guys.Congrats. Bask in my(your) glory.

Yeah, and I invented the "BLANK from hell" thing... you know, like mother-in-law from hell, neighbour from hell. That was me, I was the first person to say that.

[speedz99 145]

Yeah, and I invented the "BLANK from hell" thing... you know, like mother-in-law from hell, neighbour from hell. That was me, I was the first person to say that.

I don't think that's what he was saying.My latest thing is to use as many Sean Connery lines from this scene as possible. "Oh it breaks the heart.""I'll never forgive myself.""Thank God. It's fake!""I thought you were one of them!""I knew it.""He was actually there? You saw him?""Alexandretta! Of course! On the pilgrim trail from the Eastern Empire!" (this is a hard one to use in context)"You did!""I should have mailed it to the Marx Brothers.""Look what you did!"

[JoeyJoJo 18]

Yeah, and I invented the "BLANK from hell" thing... you know, like mother-in-law from hell, neighbour from hell. That was me, I was the first person to say that.

I invented sarcasm.

[LadyGhey 0]

I don't think that's what he was saying.

He just reminded me of Curb Your Enthusiasm is all. I just like Curb Your Enthusiasm. I'll never forgive myself.

[LadyGhey 0]

I invented sarcasm.

I invented sliced bread, TOP THAT.

[Painter567 0]

speedz,How was the movie?

[JoeyJoJo 18]

I invented sliced bread, TOP THAT.

[speedz99 145]

He just reminded me of Curb Your Enthusiasm is all. I just like Curb Your Enthusiasm.

I taped the Fast Lane episode while I was away...I'm pretty excited to watch it (for the fifth time).

I invented sliced bread, TOP THAT.

One of the main characters in the movie I'll never write is an heir to the fortune of the man who invented the closet.

[speedz99 145]

speedz,How was the movie?

I really enjoyed it, thanks. I rented the new Die Hard too, even though I promised myself I'd never see it. I may put that one on tonight if there's nothing else going on.In other news, this afternoon I taught myself Such Great Heights (as done by Iron and Wine). If that doesn't help get me laid, nothing will.

[LadyGhey 0]

In other news, this afternoon I taught myself Such Great Heights (as done by Iron and Wine). If that doesn't help get me laid, nothing will.

I actually laughed out loud at the idea of you sat there, strumming away and having a little emo moment, then finishing up the song and feeling really pleased with yourself. In other news, I learnt how to play "Who's Sorry Now" by Connie Francis today. If that doesn't scare off the men, nothing will.

[RhinestoneCowboy 2]

I invented sarcasm.

And we are all reallllllll proud of you..

[speedz99 145]

I actually laughed out loud at the idea of you sat there, strumming away and having a little emo moment, then finishing up the song and feeling really pleased with yourself.

I can't really sing along with it at the moment, so that hasn't happened yet. Yet.

And we are all reallllllll proud of you..

I laughed really, really hard at this. Well done.

[speedz99 145]

Homeward Bound is on. Ninety minutes and counting until I'm crying like a baby.

[Theraflu 1,035]

I just watched Transformers for the first time. Enjoyed it a lot.Going to my soccer game now. The dome I play at has decided to add more coed teams, meaning that not only do we have the usual slate of 9 and 10:15 games, they've added games that start at 11! You know, since no one works on Fridays in an adult coed soccer league, and surely no one will mind if the games don't end 'til midnight. And that's not counting the ride home or the shower or the time to unwind. Pretty fucking psyched that I got three 11 pm games (out of seven possible).Pretty fucking psyched.