Jump to content

I Called In Sick Today


Recommended Posts

  • Replies 268k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

  • Ron_Mexico

    19414

  • speedz99

    16304

  • Napa Lite

    7767

  • ShakeZuma

    7517

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Posts

and after 3 days, he is risen!

If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

Pocket change cost me my first and only black girlfriend.   It was in the middle of a roaring poker boom and I was flush in ways most men don't even bother dreaming of. Money, it was like dirt to me

Posted Images

yes, yes, my bad. I have a black airborne t-shirt with black panties that say "hooah" on the as s. they are cute, i swear. i haven't worn a bra in two days just because I can. I would give anything to be necking and neck with you again.
pics?
Link to post
Share on other sites
hmmmm, I haven't gotten any protests about the couch thread getting locked down, that makes it even funnier
I honestly think they were just bumping it to piss the rest of us off. I see no reason to unlock it.Highschool-caliber party at my house tonight. I am unhappy right now.
Link to post
Share on other sites
I'm bored, a little drunk, and want to play some poker, preferably above my bankroll. Anyone care to join me or talk me out of it?
Improper bankroll management??!?!!?!?!!? I won't stand for it!
Link to post
Share on other sites

Shimmering Wang's Night (in a nutshell):Playing in a 1/2 NL game, I buy in for 200. First orbit, I pick up AhKh in MP. I raise to 10. I receive 3 calls behind me, and the BB calls.Flop: ThJh3x. I check, and the hyper-bad aggressive player behind me bets 35. Fold. Call. Fold. I push for like 150 more. Bettor folds. Caller thinks, and calls. He shows 89Turn 9River blank.I lose.I rebuy and play like a maniac until I'm up to about 420ish. I open raise on the button to 10 with KdKx. BB reraises to 30. I make it 90. He instapushes having me covered, and I call.He rolls his eyes, and says "nice hand." He then tables AdJd.Flop 2 4 6rTurn ARiver blank and I'm dead.200 more. I'm down to about 150.I raise to 10 in the HiJack with AQo after one limper. BB calls, limper calls. Flop A 7 3r.I fire my standard pot-sized continuation bet of 30 dollars. Limper calls.Turn 8.Limper checks, I bet 50, limper calls.River 4Limper checks, I bet 50, limper moves in for like my last 12 dollars. I puke and call.Limper shows A4. I smile and muck, then go masturbate furiously in the bathroom, then have 20 drinks at the bar, then decide I'm going to rob a liquor store on the way home.I rebuy for 200, and win a few pots, up to 300.Wang raises to 12 UTG with AsQs. 3 calls, including the SB.Flop: 8TJ with 2 spades. I bet 40. MP player calls. LP player raises to 110. I push. MP player thinks and folds. LP player thinks and calls, with barely fewer chips than I've got. "I'll gamble!" He shows 9h6s. Turn is the 6 of diamonds, river is a board-pairing blank, and I lose again.I have 20 dollars left.Somebody raises, I hate myself and announce a blind all-in. Raiser laughs and calls, showing 9To.I have QT.Flop brings a 9, and I lose buy-in number 4.5ish.I expose my shrunken penis to everyone at the table, and shout hideous invective softly to myself as I leave the casino and drive home.Go. Team.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Toys? TOYS? Oh hell! I have TOYS!It seems kinda weird though screaming out, "Ohhhhhhhhhh Toy!! Ohhhhhhhhhh Toy!!!"
feel free to use my name...and if you could, please record it and send it to me. it would be nice to hear someone other than me screaming my name for a change.
Link to post
Share on other sites
Email? Phone number??Ive been known to make a recording or two. Btw, is your real name Hank? Thats kinda sexy, in a burly, outdoorsy kinda way.Man, I love this CD. The 80's rock!
You know...I haven't seen some certain pics that have been floating around yet...napadonpoker@aol.com
Link to post
Share on other sites
I could be getting laid at this party downstairs, but I prefer to stay in my room and wait for some people to have sex on my bed while I stay online and talk to you guys.
FYP. Sorry, but from one virgin to another, it had to be done.
Link to post
Share on other sites

Hey poker talk! Dealt to Ouch_8s [2s 2h] ZINGPOW raises to 60 Ouch_8s calls 45 tk_foster calls 30 *** FLOP *** [Qc Ac 2d] Ouch_8s checks tk_foster checks ZINGPOW checks *** TURN *** [Qc Ac 2d] [6d] Ouch_8s bets 80 tk_foster raises to 420 ZINGPOW raises to 1,440, and is all in Ouch_8s calls all in tk_foster calls all in ZINGPOW shows [Ah Qh] Ouch_8s shows [2s 2h] tk_foster shows [Ad Ts] *** RIVER *** [Qd] Hand #2 of the SNG. Stupid game.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Hey poker talk! Dealt to Ouch_8s [2s 2h] ZINGPOW raises to 60 Ouch_8s calls 45 tk_foster calls 30 *** FLOP *** [Qc Ac 2d] Ouch_8s checks tk_foster checks ZINGPOW checks *** TURN *** [Qc Ac 2d] [6d] Ouch_8s bets 80 tk_foster raises to 420 ZINGPOW raises to 1,440, and is all in Ouch_8s calls all in tk_foster calls all in ZINGPOW shows [Ah Qh] Ouch_8s shows [2s 2h] tk_foster shows [Ad Ts] *** RIVER *** [Qd] Hand #2 of the SNG. Stupid game.
Lead flop.
Link to post
Share on other sites
Lead flop.
Yeah, not that it would have made a difference. I played it for set value, and I am honestly still confused. I looked at the flop, and swear there was no 2... I had a few other windows open too, and then the turn came, and I had flopped a set. I still don't get it. Maybe I need to pay more attention. Nah.
Link to post
Share on other sites
Shout! Shout! Let it all out! These are the things I can do with out! Cmon! Im talkng to you!Cmon!
Has anyone ever heard the cover of this song by Disturbed?If so, I immediately and sincerely apologize for bringing it up, and re-hashing that pile of shit in your memories.
Link to post
Share on other sites
FYP. Sorry, but from one virgin to another, it had to be done.
It was mostly guys, which is pretty much to be expected with parties at my house. But you're right, I probably could have gotten lucky with one of them.
Link to post
Share on other sites
Slowest weekend ever. We better pick it up or Mex's head will expand to Charlie Brown-ish proportions.
Oh now you've started it. Okay, who wants to tell their favourite Ron Mexico story?
Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

Announcements


×
×
  • Create New...