Relationship Advice From A Poker Forum?

[dreamcaster 0]

Not many people know this, but I'm a fucking genius.

That's more like it.I thought I was stuck in bizarro world for a while there.

[Mercury69 3]

Get rid of the lying *****.

[mcsoupman 0]

You can't stay with her and start "watching" her or monitoring her emails and phone calls. If you start worrying about who she's talking to and where she is, it is no longer worth it.

Ron "nailed" it. If you can't trust her but still want to be with her, you will turn into a jealous, stressed out, obsessed, pathetic fool. Either you will drive her away or she will pwn you.

[brvheart 1,752]

We all have had those one night stands that we care to forget.

I thought you said you would never forget?:tear:

[CobaltBlue 662]

Regardless of the actual truth of this quote, it was freaking hilarious.

QFT.

[Oneeydjaq 0]

I do believe a donkey punch and then a 3 F'er is in order.

[Suited_Up 2]

She can't be trusted.This seems pretty clear cut to me.She's Triflin'Move on.

[cuddlemonkey 0]

Ya, ya I know, bbfidts, etc....however I spend a lot of my time on this forum, and respect the opinions of "some" of the posters here, so I thoughtI'd throw this one out to the masses in o/t.Readers digest version of the story goes like this....I started seeing a girl that I work with. (ya ya ya, I know) In the first 6 months of our relationship, it's been the best of times, and the worst of times, all rolled in to one. Things for the most partare great. We talk about most everything, she's supportive of my pokerplaying, share a lot of the same goals and ideals in life, etc.On the other hand though, I've caught her flat out lying to me, in the neighbourhood of a half dozen or so times. All of the times have to dowith other guys, and *most* of them are people from her past. One of them,however, is a friend of mine that she had a bit of history with.....She at first lied to me and said nothing had ever happened between them...Then she finally admitted that "something" had, but "it was nothing"...Promised me that was "it". Then a few days later I found out there wasmore to the story. She again promised me THAT was "it". Then I foundan email that she sent to HIM basically telling him what details SHE had toldme, so that if I came to him, they'd have their stories straight. Then I found out MORE details about what had happened. I honestly still don't know if I know the whole deal.Ever since, I've had doubts about anything and everything she tells me.Anyone been through anything similar? Is it possible to regain trust in someone once you've been burned? What should I do??

She's straight up lied 6 times in 6 months. Speaking as a guy who has done that before, you need to clear things up. I've fucked up a lot in the past and the only way the relationship was able to move forward was through 100% honesty about everything. If you both want to move forward, then you should both be willing to sit down and clear the air about everything. You don't necessarily want details, but you need her to admit that not only has she lied about things, bot that she tried to coerce your friend into lying on her behalf.If she's willing to do this and tell you that there was something between her and your friend but that it's over now (again, no details), then you need to make the decision whether or not to trust her. Either way, though, be warned- it will not be easy and there will always be some small level of tension.No matter how many opinions on this forum you respect, none of us can tell you what to do. All we can do is give our best advice and let you come to a decision. Just remember that whatever you decide, it needs to be a decision that makes you as happy as you can be in the long run. Any short term pain is worth the long term peace of mind.

[digitalmonkey 929]

Sit down with her and explain to her that you found out about her dishonesty and that it really hurt you. Tell her that everyone has done things in the past that they're not happy about, but it's always best to confront those issues and be honest rather than lie about them. She is most likely insecure and is afraid that the truth would drive you away. You must covey that you are willing to support her as long as she is truthfull. Hopefully she will understand that she can trust you and will be able to get past her insecurities and be honest with you in the future. Then you can invite her to dinner at a very nice restaurant like the Olive Garden. Tell her to enjoy herself and invite her to splurge. Emphasize that this is a new beginning and remind her that you will be paying for everything. After dinner, while your server is preparing the check, excuse yourself claiming that you need to use the washroom. Then proceed to exit the restaurant leaving that lying bitch to cover the cost.EDIT: Show up for work the next day with a t-shirt that reads "Who's Your Caucasian?"

[Mercury69 3]

Sit down with her and explain to her that you found out about her dishonesty and that it really hurt you. Tell her that everyone has done things in the past that they're not happy about, but it's always best to confront those issues and be honest rather than lie about them. She is most likely insecure and is afraid that the truth would drive you away. You must covey that you are willing to support her as long as she is truthfull. Hopefully she will understand that she can trust you and will be able to get past her insecurities and be honest with you in the future. Then you can invite her to dinner at a very nice restaurant like the Olive Garden. Tell her to enjoy herself and invite her to splurge. Emphasize that this is a new beginning and remind her that you will be paying for everything. After dinner, while your server is preparing the check, excuse yourself claiming that you need to use the washroom. Then proceed to exit the restaurant leaving that lying bitch to cover the cost.EDIT: Show up for work the next day with a t-shirt that reads "Who's Your Caucasian?"

And make sure it's somewhere more expensive than the Olive Garden.

[BearCanada 0]

Ya, ya I know, bbfidts, etc....however I spend a lot of my time on this forum, and respect the opinions of "some" of the posters here, so I thoughtI'd throw this one out to the masses in o/t.Readers digest version of the story goes like this....I started seeing a girl that I work with. (ya ya ya, I know) In the first 6 months of our relationship, it's been the best of times, and the worst of times, all rolled in to one. Things for the most partare great. We talk about most everything, she's supportive of my pokerplaying, share a lot of the same goals and ideals in life, etc.On the other hand though, I've caught her flat out lying to me, in the neighbourhood of a half dozen or so times. All of the times have to dowith other guys, and *most* of them are people from her past. One of them,however, is a friend of mine that she had a bit of history with.....She at first lied to me and said nothing had ever happened between them...Then she finally admitted that "something" had, but "it was nothing"...Promised me that was "it". Then a few days later I found out there wasmore to the story. She again promised me THAT was "it". Then I foundan email that she sent to HIM basically telling him what details SHE had toldme, so that if I came to him, they'd have their stories straight. Then I found out MORE details about what had happened. I honestly still don't know if I know the whole deal.Ever since, I've had doubts about anything and everything she tells me.Anyone been through anything similar? Is it possible to regain trust in someone once you've been burned? What should I do??

If you are thinking serious relationship, think again. It's hard but cut it loose. If she's fun and good in the sack enjoy the ride until the wave hits the beach. That's it, that's all.-Bear

[Suited_Up 2]

If you are thinking serious relationship, think again. It's hard but cut it loose. If she's fun and good in the sack enjoy the ride until the wave hits the beach. That's it, that's all.-Bear

QFT

[Canuckickstan 2]

My suggestion:

[renaedawn 1]

well, she's lying because maybe she's embarrassed about the truth and doesn't want you to know the truth about her history with this guy. That's fine, but the fact she's going to great lengths to cover it up should concern you. It all depends on how deeply you feel for this girl. If you really think you can fall in love with this girl, sit her down and discuss the lying, (not the situation with the guy, because that is irrelevant) tell her she can't lie about things to you.Either get past it and work on building a trust for her (by her earning it) and never bring that incident up again or get rid of her. There is no middle ground.You can't stay with her and start "watching" her or monitoring her emails and phone calls. If you start worrying about who she's talking to and where she is, it is no longer worth it.Cum on her face though, either way'maybe, but you're still as dumb as a bag of hammers

Bolded part is so true. The fact that she's been with the guy isn't really relevant and if you're pressuring her to tell you details then stop. That could be contributing to why she feels like she has to lie to you about it.Regardless, the fact that she's going to great lengths to cover her tracks instead of just saying "dude it was the past get over it" is indicitive of something not being quite right.I am constantly amazed at how mature, sensitive and exactly right Ron Mexico always is.

[Ron_Mexico 4,219]

I am constantly amazed at how mature, sensitive and exactly right Ron Mexico always is.

geez thanksbackhanded compliment of the week

[Nikki_N 17]

You're a whore and you've missed the point completely. Stop reading articles that justify being a whore, its just other whores trying to get more good girls to be whores, so they dont look so whorish.

Dude, wtf are you calling whore? You have no clue. If you did, you wouldn't have just insulted the most honest and caring person on the forum. I'm the whore, not Theresa. Go fuck a cheese grater.

Bolded part is so true. The fact that she's been with the guy isn't really relevant and if you're pressuring her to tell you details then stop. That could be contributing to why she feels like she has to lie to you about it.Regardless, the fact that she's going to great lengths to cover her tracks instead of just saying "dude it was the past get over it" is indicitive of something not being quite right.I am constantly amazed at how mature, sensitive and exactly right Ron Mexico always is.

I think Theresa's point goes with paragraph one. As for paragraph 2, I totally agree. The constant lies are a problem. The blatant lying needs to be addressed. Does she have to say this because you are a jealous lover? I really want to know, I'm not trying to insult you. Some people are more jealous than others.

[kers2 0]

But if you think about this, how can a man have many more partners than a woman would have? Are you sleeping with each other? The math does not make sense.

One word: Wombats

Get rid of the lying *****.

Ahem, "cunt" is 4 letters

[seanmalone 0]

Damn Nikki Nova is ****ing HOT!!!!!!!!!

[jeff_536 3]

geez thanksbackhanded compliment of the week

you'll accept this compliment, backhanded though it may be...and you'll LIKE it

[renaedawn 1]

geez thanksbackhanded compliment of the week

I didn't mean for it to be backhanded. I am amazed when any guy can be as sensitive and right on about relationships as you are. I'm doubly amazed at how often you do it.It's a compliment. Don't guilt me. I don't ignore you.

you'll accept this compliment, backhanded though it may be...and you'll LIKE it

Exactly. Don't make me get the nazi mod after you, Mex.

[Ron_Mexico 4,219]

I didn't mean for it to be backhanded. I am amazed when any guy can be as sensitive and right on about relationships as you are. I'm doubly amazed at how often you do it.It's a compliment. Don't guilt me. I don't ignore you. :PExactly. Don't make me get the nazi mod after you, Mex.

its all good ren renmeh, keith likes us better anyway.as for you Blue, don't you have somebodys wife to pork?

[theresa113 0]

First of all, I do not condone lying. Never have, never will. I am probably one of the most honest people you will ever meet. When a woman says it was no big deal she means it. It means her heart was not into this guy and or he blew her off after one encounter. She has moved on. I was reading in-between the lines on the OPs submission. To me, I got the impression that he keeps bringing up her past and putting pressure on her to spill her guts. I would want to hear exactly how this girl blatantly lied. Also, if all of this happened before the relationship, what is the big deal? I also question are these lies of omission or commission? If she just isn't telling you something... it could be that she just is not ready. That is my point of view. Anyway... to the guy that called me a whore... thank you very much.

[CardWarfare 4]

*hijacking*FCP Online Poker Name: theresa1130Ah HA! So that WAS you playing some .5/1 LO8 last night! I tried to get in your table, but it was full, and i think i took your seat when you left. Clearly you saw my name on the list and went running for cover for fear that my expert play and superior charm and wit would quickly relieve you of your money.Either that, or I'm totally off.

[theresa113 0]

*hijacking*FCP Online Poker Name: theresa1130Ah HA! So that WAS you playing some .5/1 LO8 last night! I tried to get in your table, but it was full, and i think i took your seat when you left. Clearly you saw my name on the list and went running for cover for fear that my expert play and superior charm and wit would quickly relieve you of your money.Either that, or I'm totally off.

I had cfinnn sitting next to me and I did not even notice her. Yeah, that was me. I was reading, writing an article, surfing and playing. I really had no clue what was going on. Anyway... good idea. I think I will play some poker.

[digitalmonkey 929]

*hijacking*FCP Online Poker Name: theresa1130Ah HA! So that WAS you playing some .5/1 LO8 last night! I tried to get in your table, but it was full, and i think i took your seat when you left. Clearly you saw my name on the list and went running for cover for fear that my expert play and superior charm and wit would quickly relieve you of your money.Either that, or I'm totally off.

Obviously she had some whoring to get to.