I Called In Sick Today

[SuitedAces21 2,723]

I have an undergrad, what would I need to do to be a teacher?

 

i think about this sometimes too. i even googled the requirements a few times, and i think i would be happier as a teacher and coach, but then i imagine cutting my income by more than half and i always give up that dream. at this point, it's near impossible that i will ever marry or have kids, so if i ride out corporate america until 50 i could probably retire early. though i'd have absolutely nothing to do besides work, so i'd probably stay on for some sense of self worth.

 

i went up to the casino last night. left up a buck twenty five, mostly due to one weird hand. this guy who obviously had no idea what he was doing kept betting put only putting half the chips across the line - at this casino the chips need to cross the line. the dealers wanted him time and again, but he kept doing it. i hoped he would make this mistake against me in some big pot, and sure enough he did.

 

i was on the button with 6 4 spades. limped to me so i make it 12, juice it up a bit. 5 callers obviously, including the moron. flop is 5 5 2, two spades. the moron was the big blind and he obviously flopped trips, i mean he might as well have said it. he bets 50, no mistakes. folded to me and i call. turn is a blank, and he counts out, behind the line, 100 to bet, but he only puts in 25 leaving the other 75 behind the line. dealer tells him thats a string bet and its 25 to me. there's 185 now int he pot and its 25 to me so obviously i call. river finds me flushing, and this guy fires out 200 anyways, slamming the stacks across the line. i call and he has ace 5. as i'm scooping he says its bullshit and i looked at him and said, next time bet the right amount. he was super pissed. but what a moron. but that's why i keep going back.

[David_Sklansky 1,904]

i think about this sometimes too. i even googled the requirements a few times, and i think i would be happier as a teacher and coach, but then i imagine cutting my income by more than half and i always give up that dream. at this point, it's near impossible that i will ever marry or have kids, so if i ride out corporate america until 50 i could probably retire early. though i'd have absolutely nothing to do besides work, so i'd probably stay on for some sense of self worth.

 

Teacher seems like the best job there is, other than the money. If I were in the position a lot of you guys are in, I’d probably be looking to marry rich. Most rich women aren’t going to be cool with you quitting your job to live a baller life as a house husband, but teaching is a noble and respected profession, especially if you tell people you retired from law to dedicate your time to our future, the children. What’s she going to say? And I f you do it right, you’re basically just wake n baking 9 months out of the year, roasting some poorly written papers or circular proofs or whatever, and talking whatever shit you want for hours, to a captive audience of children. I think this is your best option amongst a bunch of bad ones.

 

You could also retire from law earlier than even planned, and teach in retirement, but there is something specific about a rich person coming home at night, quietly resentful that I’ve been on xer expensive coach doing shatter since 3pm that really does it for me.

[InternetExplorer 2,609]

The math works for me to be done by age 50, but the problem is, I don’t think I can make it that long. It’s become a frustrating experience, to the point where giving up half of my income doesn’t sound like the worst outcome. That’d be a huge step, not one I’d take lightly of course... and I think the odds of me getting back to where I am currently are kinda slim.

[Napa_Don 688]

One of my high school English teachers was a CPA who quit to teach. Or retired and then taught. I don’t know. He was super into telling people to go to NW Missouri State, major in accounting, and then go work for the IRS. He also taught the community college credit accounting course but I, like an idiot, decided to have an extra study hall instead of taking it because why would I need an accounting class for engineering?

[David_Sklansky 1,904]

Re: teaching and money:

 

A huge percentage of teachers seem to supplement their income with a pyramid scheme.

[CobaltBlue 662]

A huge percentage of teachers seem to supplement their income with a pyramid scheme.

Depending on how you define poker and cryptocurrencies...confirmed.

[brvheart 1,757]

The math works for me to be done by age 50, but the problem is, I don’t think I can make it that long. It’s become a frustrating experience, to the point where giving up half of my income doesn’t sound like the worst outcome. That’d be a huge step, not one I’d take lightly of course... and I think the odds of me getting back to where I am currently are kinda slim.

 

You can do ok teaching:

 

https://www.winnetka..._SY15_FINAL.pdf

 

You get 2 months or more of vacation plus sicks days and good benefits.

 

 

You can find the salaries of basically any district by just Googling "teacher salaries pdf [city state]"

[InternetExplorer 2,609]

No wonder IL is broke.

[BigDMcGee 3,355]

Judging how long it is taking you to break up with your girlfriend, i expect you to complete your career change in the spring of 2043

[InternetExplorer 2,609]

If I stayed stagnant on my comp for five years, I might have the resume to make a lateral move. I wish it were as simple as “go take a 10% cut and start over.”

[Theraflu 1,035]

So are you over or under compensated? Both?

[InternetExplorer 2,609]

So are you over or under compensated? Both?

Adjusting for responsibilities etc. I’m under-comped compared to a lot of others at my firm, but on paper it would be very tough to justify this salary. It’s easy to look at salary ranges and conclude that I’m overpaid, which is exactly what my new boss did in this last performance cycle. And she was dumb enough to straight up tell me that I shouldn’t expect any more big raises at this company. The poker game is trying to figure out whether that was an official take from management, and trying not to waste another 12 months here if it is indeed a dead end.

 

If it sounds crazy that my boss could do that A-Z without talking to anyone in management... no, the situation is asinine, my boss just had to keep the raise in a certain range, and nobody would have cared what was said or done with a guy that could kneecap the firm if he departed abruptly.

[Napa_Don 688]

I think part of the reason I’m taking so long to unpack is that the space where I’m currently keeping some boxes will have nothing to go there once the boxes are gone, which is just an asinine excuse.

[hank213 1,823]

The desire to teach stems from a lack of feeling heard and/or a perception of having your expertise unappreciated. Becoming a public school teacher is pretty much the worst conceivable way to overcome that feeling, Start a blog or a podcast or join a professional organization or anything else but for the love of all thing brvy don't teach.

[SuitedAces21 2,723]

i called in sick today. just wasn't feeling all that well.

[SuitedAces21 2,723]

i don't think my desire to teach stems from that. i wanted to teach when i was younger, mostly so i could coach in high school. i really did love coaching sports.

[mrfritz 904]

Any of you guys (napa) like hot peppers? Had a Trinidad scorpion pepper, and it was insanely hot. Definitely recommend if you're into getting fvcked up on spicy foods.

 

 

 

[BigDMcGee 3,355]

How did you prepare it?

[mrfritz 904]

I didn't, just ate it raw. I'm not sure what I make with it other than maybe chili, the heat is overwhelming. I have about 10 others on the plant that are going to be ripe soon enough, I should probably figure out what I'm going to do with them..

[Napa_Don 688]

Any of you guys (napa) like hot peppers? Had a Trinidad scorpion pepper, and it was insanely hot. Definitely recommend if you're into getting fvcked up on spicy foods.

 

 

 

 

I like kinda spicy foods but my butthole doesn't, unfortunately. That would probably kill me going in and out.

 

Edit: Oh, if you're looking to get rid of them my old roommate loves spicy foods and I bet she would dig it. I'd pay for shipping or whatever, assuming it's easy enough to ship peppers? I have no idea.

[mrfritz 904]

In was worse than out, though out was no picnic either.

[BigDMcGee 3,355]

Make your own hot sauce

[hank213 1,823]

now mister fritzy picked peppers but hank rapped rhymes

suited aces ate chipotle that's his hard time

strategery was strategic, his shlong was thick

the topic of the day is beer, sports and tits.

[brvheart 1,757]

I love spicy foods, but I'm not into insanely hot hybrid peppers or anything. Thai Chilis, habaneros, and whatnot go in a lot of stuff I make, but I would never get enjoyment out of just eating them raw, and certainly not scorpion peppers or ghost peppers or anything like that.

[Essay21 2,387]

Anything hotter than the red sauce at chipotle is pointless and eaten more so you can say you did than any flavor.