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I Called In Sick Today


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Enjoyed the Oregon game but turned off the Alabama vs Ohio State game when the eventual outcome became obvious. I can only do so many hours of college football in one day.

 

lol

 

"obvious"

 

 

OSU 34 - AL 21

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and after 3 days, he is risen!

If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

Pocket change cost me my first and only black girlfriend.   It was in the middle of a roaring poker boom and I was flush in ways most men don't even bother dreaming of. Money, it was like dirt to me

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It's such a thing of beauty when you realize that the runner is too fast and cannot be run down. I think I might hate Alabama more than the Patriots.

 

hmm.

 

 

No, I still hate the Patriots more... but it's close.

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It's NYE, and things are getting weird. The couples should have played that game with partner swapping.

 

Am I reading this correctly, IE, were you a 5th wheel? Maybe some single could have been the DH.

My roommate is not sure that he wants to date my girl's best friend. The two of them had plans for a sleepover on NYE, so when I invited my girl and he did not invite his... game over.

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no, it's not official. I was just using it to make the story clearer. I still haven't taken her out on a date or anything, we've just had lunch and text infinite amounts. we could be just friends, and that would be fine with me, but I don't think we are on the friend track.

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i don't even know what this means. we all have our off nights, ronny. i'm sure you've been there.

 

I actually havent. Only happened twice, both times I was bombed. It was booze induced. One of those times was with two hot, by any standards, women and me. I still delivered in other ways

 

The other time was when i converted the lesbo for the night. I was hard until I decided a condom might be in order. I ruined the flow.

 

But never happened sober. I'm a horny toad

 

The joke meant that only you can get you hard. Too much porn

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Ahh that old chestnut.

 

I get hard everytime with a lady. My problem lies in that sometimes when im hard to earlier, then we move into the bedroom and i lose it and i cant get it back. Most of the time it comes back but sometimes it doesnt.

 

 

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.

 

Also that a ridiculously hot girl that we played against in volleyball this summer is getting a divorce because her husband is gay. I need to find out where she hangs out at because I'm sure her self-esteem is at an all time low right now.

 

.

 

Cmon now, Her self esteem aint gonna be that low.

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Both you and nap just need to find a girl, any girl, that is horny and really digs you. After that, everything falls into place

 

Superficiality gets you nowhere. Napa is there, i think. Essay still wants to drink champagne on a natty light budget.

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Oh, I'm there buddy. I'm there. I just don't put forth any effort. NYE I only talked to 3 girls and that's because they were standing next to me and I didn't have to get up from my seat. And you could hardly call it hitting on them.

 

Let's reevaluate in three months when I emerge from my cocoon.

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Although, to be clear, I've done it. It was easier in my 30s. Although, arent younger girls pretty casual these days? But then that goes back to them banging the "hot guy". Although, maybe iowa and the midwest are different

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i mean, ohio state handed bama 14 to go down 21-6. since then its 21 unanswered and a 27-21 lead for the buckeyes. get that tv back on sir.

 

Yeah...pulled out too early on that one. Thankfully I had been on Twitter when they were making their come back so I tuned back in. Ohio tried their damnedest to puke it up with their horrible play calling on that last drive...throwing a bomb on first down when you need to burn clock?? Of course Alabamas play calling at the end was just as bad. Happy Ohio State won. Going to be a fun National Championship but I think Oregon rolls them.

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Nah, the problem with the Midwest is that basically, whether they want to admit it or not, all guys have a "any port in the storm" mentality and the girls are privy to this and so the girls that are realistically on the same level as me can get a guy thats 2-3 levels higher than me, and rightfully choose to do so.

 

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Move to a real state you piece of shit.

 

You're welcome.

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And before anybody thinks I'm women blaming here know I'm joking and take 99% of the responsibility for my lack of sexual partners.

 

Nah, you just need to master the alcohol induced sexing, more commonly referred to in today's vernacular as, well, rape

 

I kid. Frau knows how I do. Oh, she knows

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