I Called In Sick Today

[SuitedAces21 2,722]

yeah i get it, atlanta is not the place for me.

[Tiltinagain 973]

You misread her post. She said she dressed conservatively in her normal life. At donor parties she's flopping around.

 

Well that makes much more sense. Thank you.

 

Hot Friday, who has weekend plans?

 

I'll be working and going to view some apartments. Moving in August. Gonna live on my own.

 

We might get rain overnight (which means a sprinkle or two)...side note, it's very odd how it rarely rains during the day here.... anyway, for some reason everyone here is off all weekend so we're working on a family day doing something. So far the San Diego Zoo is the front runner I guess. I've been when I was a kid but the wife and kids have never been. Due to the rain possibility we may go Sunday as it's supposed to be the nicer day.

 

For Tilt:

 

Supplies: 1 Crock Pot

 

 

2 1/2 pounds of round steak (diced)

1 c chopped onion

1 clove fresh garlic

16 oz of fresh mushrooms (optional, since your wife doesn't like them)

2 Tbs Worcestershire Sauce

2 cans golden mushroom soup

8 oz cream cheese

 

 

In a skillet saute the mushrooms, onion, and garlic for 5 minutes.

 

Add all ingredients (except for the cream cheese) to the Crock Pot, and turn it on low for 6 to 7 hours. Add cream cheese 1/2 hour before serving.

 

Serve over pasta. (Normally Egg Noodles, but whatever you prefer)

 

That's going to make a lot of stroganoff isn't it?

 

Also, no seasonings? Obviously the soup has enough salt but no pepper, paprika, just the garlic?

 

I only ask because everyone has different tastes and I can't do blandish foods and not sure what you like. That said, I always do new recipes exactly as written the first time and only adjust to my tastes if I feel like it needs it for next time.

 

Thanks for posting.

 

I am surprised that Dutch's Texas ranking has San Antonio above Dallas. (Especially the Dallas suburbs). I've heard really good things about the Dallas and Austin areas.

[hank213 1,823]

titly you gotta remember for brv a family meal is like cooking for caribbean nation.

 

also, gotta have paprika.

[Sickinfo2 291]

Spent a couple weeks in atlanta back in the late nineties.... telecom company had us directional bore some fiber optics through an area of ground filled with utilities and thee other fiber cables. The humidity was so high the air compressor tanks had to be drained hourly. It was miserable. My only other notable recollection of the place was the unbelievable amount of super obese black women pushing shopping carts up and down the sidewalk. A few contained groceries, but the overwhelming majority were empty and apparently used as walkers...

 

 

 

 

And Dutch is correct.... the ground is so bad it it holds water like a swimming pool. The first day or so we had to constantly pull the boring bars back to remove the tailings since pumping water through the shaft wouldnt wash it out. Just turned the ground into a snotty mess and slowed progress to a grinding crawl

 

 

 

 

Since Im sure the statute of limitations have long expired.... shit...like anyone would believe it anyway.... I made a few calls and arranged for a tanker of avgas to be brought to the scene that had accidentally been ruined by the addition of jeta...kerosene in other lingo. The FBO it belonged to was facing some serious loss of cash for sending it out for disposal and just parked the rig and bought another one. After some scientific experiments with clay and flammable liquids one evening in the hotel bathtub, I took a considerable risk and made a deal to get rid of its contents for transferring title of the truck to yours truly. For the next several nights we brought in the truck around midnight and pumped the flammable liquid.... with afew inert ingredients like corn starch added.... into the bore and reclaimed as much as possible in tanks that were later hauled down seldom traveled roads with the valves cracked open. Hey, when I was a kid the county used to recycle all their used motor oil by spreading it on dirt roads to settle the dust. Like most anything Ive ever pulled, I can always twist shit around enough to make two wrongs a right

 

 

 

 

Interesting side tale...

 

 

 

 

A fellow contractor got wind of what we did and bid a project that required removal of some old underground gas station fuel tanks and the disposal of several hundred gallons of old gasoline

 

 

 

 

Figuring he could be Beans for a night, the tanks were suctioned dry and their contents taken out in the country for some road dusting. Unfortunately for him, a car load of drunk teens were driving the roads that night and saw what he was doing. Instead of calling the cops, they did what me or any other troublemaker in the would would do...

 

 

 

 

They lit the ground behind him

 

 

 

 

Fortunately for him, the truck was able to outrun the flames until the tanks dried up. Unfortunately for him, the mass wildfire that claimed several hundred acres and a few houses was pinned on his chest. I think he may have gotten away with a fine but for a spell the talk of iron bars was in the papers...

 

 

 

 

 

Speaking of ruining the earths potable water supply.... many moons ago I was out in the middle of nowhere driving around drinking beer and road hunting deer when I happened across a fellow dumping raw sewage into a creek. Best part was the stream was called "clear creek"

 

 

 

 

It was a pretty tropical blue from the porta potty chemicals. Anyway, those guys almost always find someplace to get rid of the shitters shit to keep from paying the disposal fees. Always one for following the rules to a "t", I explained to the chap that it was my civic duty to call the proper authorities and inform them of his blatant disrespect of the environment...

 

 

 

 

As badly as I felt about it though, I agreed to turn my head since he was just a poor ole feller tryin to make a livin. Even gave him quite a bit of business for a while pumping out my car wash settlement tanks and using his shitters on our job sites

 

 

 

 

 

Free of charge of course....

 

 

 

 

And no.... I refused to allow him to pollute our streams anymore. Just to make sure, I hauled him around one evening and pointed out several hidden manholes where the toxic matter would be whisked right to the local treatment plant....the very place he was supposed to take it in the first place

 

 

 

 

 

 

That covers the topic of shit tonight.... piss, too

 

 

 

 

Youre welcoime

[brvheart 1,752]

Also, no seasonings? Obviously the soup has enough salt but no pepper, paprika, just the garlic?

 

Salt and pepper were a given. I should have included it though.

 

I love spice. I usually add crushed red pepper to Mac&cheese, and fresh, diced Habarenos to most of my soups. The spicer the better normally.

 

However, I really enjoy this recipe as is. I haven't tried it with Paprika.

 

 

My go-to spice is a Creole blend from Emril. I just refill an old Oregano bottle when it gets low.

 

http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/emeril-lagasse/emerils-essence-creole-seasoning-recipe2.html#!

 

[brvheart 1,752]

I am surprised that Dutch's Texas ranking has San Antonio above Dallas. (Especially the Dallas suburbs). I've heard really good things about the Dallas and Austin areas.

 

I was more surprised that San Antonio wasn't a clear #1. San Antonio is awesome. I like Dallas a lot, but I don't think it holds a candle to SA.

 

Fun fact: I saw my first drive-thru liquor store in Dallas. At the time I did think that seemed like a good idea, but now I'm just hoping that will jog Beans' memory for some more good stories.

[David_Sklansky 1,903]

Dallas really does have a ton of attractive, nice, whorish white women, if you are into that.

 

I prefer San Antonio by a lot. Dallas is kind of like a better version of ATL. It lacks personality, the architecture is pretty bad, and it kind of just feels like a big, hot parking lot full of mega churches.

[hank213 1,823]

so i just saw a commercial from a prime time recording. the ad was for a phone or some other new, wannabe "hip" device in which a group of teenage girls are singing Gigantic. I couldn't stop giggling about it. I wonder if the execs paying the ad agency know they shelled out tons of cash to have teenage girls sing about big black cock on national television in support of their new contraption.

[JubilantLankyLad 1,957]

How long were you planning that coup?

[hank213 1,823]

boredom is a dangerous thing.

[Roll the Bones 74]

With beans it's always the little side comments that are awesome...

 

"Driving around hunting deer"

 

Haha

[ShakeZuma 585]

wow, so I guess when hank does coke he turns into chrozzo. but with actual content.

[mrfritz 888]

hank what in the name of high school football...

[David_Sklansky 1,903]

You guys think Hank alienated all his irl friends first last night with his addiction, and then just kept on marching to sea, or you think we acted as a lightning rod for all his coked up alienation energy?

 

I know both games too well. We're gonna get you in a program, buddy.

[hank213 1,823]

l-o-l at "irl friends"

 

i honestly don't know what that was all about. first it was simply a casual notice that i had the last response in the top 3 or 4 threads....so I thought I'd add another one, and then one more, then i just kept run ing.

[Essay21 2,385]

I'm proud of hank. A night well spent.

[hank213 1,823]

oh jesus.

 

i really do have a problem.

[Essay21 2,385]

I went out last night. Talked to a lady or two, and they weren't interested. One of was in my buddy though, she wanted that donger but he was not giving it up. He was like it's just weird when a girl comes on to you like that, you know?

 

No I really don't.

[David_Sklansky 1,903]

There is nothing worse than a girl who shows initiative and the rejection of dated gender roles, who wants to go home with you. I would have roofied her and left her in the parking lot just to keep her from following me, the slutty, desperate bitch.

[David_Sklansky 1,903]

I was ridiculously ****ed up last night, too. I was crashing from a cocktail of pills earlier in the day, so I was taking a bunch more to stay up, and I was a zombie. I just had to look up the outcomes of 3 basketball games I watched, because I blacked them out.

[brvheart 1,752]

Oh wow. I thought there was something wrong with my browser. Nicely done Hank.

[hank213 1,823]

I was ridiculously ****ed up last night, too. I was crashing from a cocktail of pills earlier in the day, so I was taking a bunch more to stay up, and I was a zombie. I just had to look up the outcomes of 3 basketball games I watched, because I blacked them out.

now that is a night well spent.

 

i haven't been completely stupefied kind of fucked up in a great while.

 

i'd like to eat some mushrooms but i'm just a big ball of negative emotions right now so I'm pretty much guaranteed a bad trip.

[Tiltinagain 973]

I went out last night. Talked to a lady or two, and they weren't interested. One of was in my buddy though, she wanted that donger but he was not giving it up. He was like it's just weird when a girl comes on to you like that, you know?

 

No I really don't.

 

Years ago I was visiting a friend in Spokane. We were thinking of moving there (7 years before actually did), my mom had passed away about a year earlier and I was still fvcked up about it and just needed a break from life. (My visit turned into a 2 month stay) My buddy and I went out to clubs/bars 3 to 4 nights a week and one of us would stay relatively sober in order to serve as the DD. One night we were out at our regular weekend place with another buddy of his, got bored and we decided to go to another bar downtown.

 

It was a pretty cool bar. The three of us walked in and there was a bar along the right side and pool tables along the left. You keep walking through the room, make a left down a hallway then come into a pretty big room where there's 2 more bars, a dance floor and several tables. I'm behind both of my buddies and we barely made it to a table when someone grabs my arm from behind. I turn around to see a nice looking blonde gal smiling at me. I smile back, say hi and she says "want to dance?". I had never had this happen and was a little taken aback but I said "of course, let me put my beer down and take my jacket off real quick". Both of my friends had now realized what was happening and were quite literally standing there with their mouths hanging open and incredulous looks on their faces. As I grab the girls hand and head to the dance floor one of them says "WTF?! 3 dudes walk in and it's the married guy that gets asked to dance?". At that comment the girl looks over at me with a devilish little grin and pulls me onto the floor.

 

We danced to 2 or 3 songs then a slow dance comes on. During the course of that dance she makes it very clear that she wasn't just looking for a dance partner for the night. Problem is, I'm married and while I often danced with women when we would go out, I had intention of going beyond that.

 

So the slow dance ends and I tell her I need a drink. We walk back to the table....the looks on my buddies faces were priceless. Anyway, I grab my beer and order a drink for the girl from a nearby waitress and when her drink comes I lean into my buddy and say "Hey man, I need to talk to you a minute". So we excuse ourselves to take a leak and I tel him "Look, this girl is looking to get laid. As much as I would like to I'm not going there so when we get back out there ask her to dance and I'm just going to make myself scarce and you can put on the full court press."

 

So we go back out, I say I'll be right back because I see a friend at the other side of the room and my buddy asks her to dance. About an hour later he leaves with her and I drive our other buddy and myself home. My buddy comes in the door about noon the next day, collapses on the couch and spares no detail telling me about the fvck fest that he had with this girl all night.

 

We still talk about that night from time to time and I am still torn about whether to be proud of my best wing man mission ever or to beat myself up over turning down a sure thing.

[Napa Lite 3,278]

I got super drunk last night, too. Only girls I talked to was the bartender and this larger chick that my roommate banged a few months ago. All in all it was a good night.

[hank213 1,823]

tilty that sounds like the time 4 of us went to TJ and the only guy to act on the extra services of a stripper was the guy that had a live in gf. you were the better man there.

 

there was one that i was surely tempted by. this place didn't have a stage just a bunch of squares around the bar that were about a foot higher than the rest of the floor. as i'm walking by this stripper grabs my hand, sticks my finger up her snizz and proceeds to milk it like a dairy cow. on top of that she was actually kind of decent looking. if i would've been more flush with cash for that vacation i probably would've banged that ho.