iZuma 764 Posted April 20, 2012 Share Posted April 20, 2012 too late brv I'm already on the way to gd california Link to post Share on other sites
InternetExplorer 2,609 Posted April 20, 2012 Share Posted April 20, 2012 it's 66 and sunny outside. nature is SERIOUSLY testing my beer ban. Link to post Share on other sites
SuitedAces21 2,722 Posted April 20, 2012 Share Posted April 20, 2012 it's 66 and sunny outside. nature is SERIOUSLY testing my beer ban.hell of a day for a ballgame. beer and brats tonight sir. Link to post Share on other sites
mk 11 Posted April 20, 2012 Share Posted April 20, 2012 My one non-cheesesteak meal was at a hot dog place. This happened when I got up to the counter:"Yeah, I'll have a foot long hot dog."All of a sudden a deep voice speaks up from behind me."Ohhh, yeah. You GOT to get that foot long!"I look back, and there's a mid-40s black guy standing in line behind me. He was about 5'8", with a scraggly beard and dark green trucker-style hat. I was a bit confused, but quickly turned back to the girl behind the counter."What would you like on that?""Can I get some onions, spi-""Mmm, MM! You got to HAVE them onions!""Uh, some spicy mustard...""SPICY mustard!""...and some jalapenos, please."She rang me up while the dog was being prepared, and handed it down to me. I grabbed it, turned around, and as I walked away..."Ohhhh, yeah. That's a GOOD looking sandwich!"I want to hire that guy to follow me around all the time. Link to post Share on other sites
DJ Vu 176 Posted April 20, 2012 Share Posted April 20, 2012 I don't remember that story; I liked it. Link to post Share on other sites
vbnautilus 48 Posted April 20, 2012 Share Posted April 20, 2012 I don't remember that storynot buying it Link to post Share on other sites
brvheart 1,752 Posted April 20, 2012 Share Posted April 20, 2012 Even I remember that story, and I have dementia. Link to post Share on other sites
Ron_Mexico 4,219 Posted April 20, 2012 Share Posted April 20, 2012 even if I was making good money, I wouldn't regularly waste it on expensive steaks. you would think, me being a chubby person, I would put way more value on good food. I have been known to choose fast food over steaks in the past.You'll change your tune with age and priorities. You're a beer snob now, that'll translate to food later on when you have your own money and no coins or magnets to buyis it okay to eat my steak with ketchup? because i love ketchup on everything.I wanna punch you, but at your age, I WAS YOU. Including the no pussy and ketchup on steaksreduced?my first thought as well, excellently done. wait why would anybody buy a pre-seasoned steak?BOGO bitch. BOGO Link to post Share on other sites
Napa Lite 3,278 Posted April 21, 2012 Share Posted April 21, 2012 So I'm drunk and at a friends house and the chick is outside the house playing flip cup. Just wanted to update you guys. Link to post Share on other sites
InternetExplorer 2,609 Posted April 21, 2012 Share Posted April 21, 2012 well that's not awkward or anything. Link to post Share on other sites
Ron_Mexico 4,219 Posted April 21, 2012 Share Posted April 21, 2012 So I'm drunk and at a friends house and the chick is outside the house playing flip cup. Just wanted to update you guys.Please go outside, dive on the table, flop like a fish out of water until you're face up and close to her and scream "I texted you this week!!!!" Link to post Share on other sites
Napa Lite 3,278 Posted April 21, 2012 Share Posted April 21, 2012 True story. My girl friend who I wanted to help me accidentally run into her went up to her and told her "Napa was hoping to see you" and she's like "oh yeah, he texted me this week but I forgot to text him back".Lol ya ok. It's unfortunate cause she's rolling with some girls I do know that I am friends with that I'd like to see. Gonna keep pounding beers until I really don't give a shit. Link to post Share on other sites
Napa Lite 3,278 Posted April 21, 2012 Share Posted April 21, 2012 Haha, I went outside after I let you guys know but she was already gone. Love my life. Link to post Share on other sites
InternetExplorer 2,609 Posted April 21, 2012 Share Posted April 21, 2012 hey, we've cut the response time significantly from 6 months. progress. Link to post Share on other sites
Ron_Mexico 4,219 Posted April 21, 2012 Share Posted April 21, 2012 Girl-- "oh no, that guy who has my number, texted me and offered to poop on my chest is here, let's ski-daddle girls. This place is dead anyway."And for the record, you can't take every no as a sign of your horribleness. Sometimes people just got other shit going on. That being said, I take every slight personally, but that's because I'm an egomaniac and think everything is about me. People tell me that's not true. I don't see it. Link to post Share on other sites
Napa Lite 3,278 Posted April 21, 2012 Share Posted April 21, 2012 Thanks RM. you've always got my back. (that might not be true, I have negative self-esteem so I always assume its my problem). Link to post Share on other sites
Ron_Mexico 4,219 Posted April 21, 2012 Share Posted April 21, 2012 I'll take your back. Grrrrrr. Wink wink Wait, I meant if we wrestled, or did jujitsu together. Yeah, that's itI still can't believe you're tall. You look 12 and 5'5We gotta do something with that hair. Slick it back, spike it up, flock of seagulls that shit. Something. Middle part has gotta go. You are still rockin that right? We shall overcome Link to post Share on other sites
Napa Lite 3,278 Posted April 21, 2012 Share Posted April 21, 2012 I mean, idk if I've ever middle parted it. As of late I just kinda throw gell in it and see what happens which usually ends up being a side part or something. But yeah, my hair is terrible and I refuse to spend more than $20 on a haircut because I feel like its not gonna matter anyways until I lose weight or something. Idk. At a friends apartment waiting for said girl friend to change before we go out again. Now I kinda want to run into the girl. Make it as awkward as possible for her. **** her. Link to post Share on other sites
Ron_Mexico 4,219 Posted April 21, 2012 Share Posted April 21, 2012 Blame some dude for hacking your phone and texting everyone. You would never text her and have no idea why you'd have her number. Also, after perusing your pics, you ain't that fcking fat so stop using that as a crutch tubby. Second, comb your damn hair. You got something to work with. $20 haircut is fine. Put a little color on the face. Get some sun. Third, the suit pic looked good. Become the blazer and jeans guy. You're a professional now. Use that. The green shirt with glasses pics were good. Too bad at night or indoor glasses are douchey. Maybe you're too much of a goofball and the ladies dont see you in a sexual way. Ratchet the sex talk up around women, but don't be creep. Maybe make up a girlfriend that you used to fck all the time. Wait, don't do that. Scratch that. That's all I got for now.Innuendos. That's all I'm sayin Link to post Share on other sites
Sickinfo2 291 Posted April 21, 2012 Share Posted April 21, 2012 So I'm drunk and at a friends house and the chick is outside the house playing flip cup. Just wanted to update you guys.Beans advice:Get within earshot and start playing with your phone. Phone. Then loudly state... "HOLY HELL SHIT FIRE DAMN! I HATE THIS DAMN PHONE! JUST GOT A TEXT FROM A BUDDY WHO WANTS TO HIT THE HAUNTED HOUSE LATER TONIGHT! WHADDA THEY USIN OVER THERE...VACUUM TUBES? THESE SENDING DELAYS ARE GETTING WORSE AND WORSE! IM SWITCHING TO VERIZON....CANT TRUST ANY CELL COMPANY CALLED PONY EXPRESS!"In other news, ya....the propane scam hit me pretty hard a few years back. Bastards wanted like two hundred bucks to fill the motorhome that holds probably twenty gallonsSame shit for the forklifts, so when they wouldnt cut me a discount for throwing them so much business I bought two five hundred gallon tanks for a few hundred and rigged up a pumping station to fill my own shit. At first the bastards wouldnt fill them because they knew what I was going to do, so I hooked both tanks up to a tiny gas heater in the warehouse and threatened to get the public service commission involved if they didnt "So youre telling me that you need a thousand gallons of propane for that little heater?"Fuckin A bubba....""..."I came out like a bandit...that was back when the stuff was about a buck a gallon. Last I heard it was pushing three now. Probably still have seventy five percent of it leftSo Sal, detour up ninety three in Kingman and exit off Dean Martin on fifteen. Give me a ring when you get in front of the warehouse used to build the duplicate safe in oceans eleven...Ill bring you in from there Link to post Share on other sites
Tiltinagain 973 Posted April 21, 2012 Share Posted April 21, 2012 i want to ed norton on jared leto in fight club you so bad right now.And you wonder why you can't get laid.hell of a day for a ballgame. beer and brats tonight sir.Don't forget the Ketchup!I wanna punch you, but at your age, I WAS YOU. Including the no pussy and ketchup on steaksSee, Mr. Mexico gave up spicy tomato paste and started getting laid. Huh. Link to post Share on other sites
SuitedAces21 2,722 Posted April 21, 2012 Share Posted April 21, 2012 So I'm drunk and at a friends house and the chick is outside the house playing flip cup. Just wanted to update you guys.fuck that bitch. And you wonder why you can't get laid.Don't forget the Ketchup!See, Mr. Mexico gave up spicy tomato paste and started getting laid. Huh.i got laid last halloween, so i'm good for a year or two.i put more ketchup on my dollar hot dogs than any man before. and it was amazing.mr. mexico probably has a thigh slapper. i don't have a thigh slapper. Link to post Share on other sites
ShakeZuma 585 Posted April 21, 2012 Share Posted April 21, 2012 Even I remember that story, and I have dementia.haha you're old and stupidGet within earshot and start playing with your phone. Phone. Then loudly state... "HOLY HELL SHIT FIRE DAMN! I HATE THIS DAMN PHONE! JUST GOT A TEXT FROM A BUDDY WHO WANTS TO HIT THE HAUNTED HOUSE LATER TONIGHT! WHADDA THEY USIN OVER THERE...VACUUM TUBES? THESE SENDING DELAYS ARE GETTING WORSE AND WORSE! IM SWITCHING TO VERIZON....CANT TRUST ANY CELL COMPANY CALLED PONY EXPRESS!"oh my god I don't know why but I couldn't stop laughing at this.but seriously napa, she's horrible. rape is the only solution. the FINAL solution. get it? GET IT?So Sal, detour up ninety three in Kingman and exit off Dean Martin on fifteen. Give me a ring when you get in front of the warehouse used to build the duplicate safe in oceans eleven...Ill bring you in from thereone of these days beans, one of these days. I actually am just going to drive out there with a cooler and a fishing pole and god damn it, one of us is going to die.edit: napa I mean rape her and call her a jew. Link to post Share on other sites
brvheart 1,752 Posted April 21, 2012 Share Posted April 21, 2012 I still can't believe you're tall. You look 12 and 5'5Because I'm so tall I generally see everyone around me as short. I spent hundreds of hours working with Napa and I couldn't begin to accurately nail his height without completely guessing. My honest guess is that he's 5'10". I have no idea if that's true.He does look 12. Link to post Share on other sites
brvheart 1,752 Posted April 21, 2012 Share Posted April 21, 2012 I came out like a bandit...that was back when the stuff was about a buck a gallon. Last I heard it was pushing three now. Probably still have seventy five percent of it leftYeah, I've been out of the propane game since 2005, when we were buying it wholesale for 50-65 cents a gallon. I was just guessing the price, although I'm surprised to hear it's up to $3. Does it go bad like gas? I mean, at this rate, you won't need a refill until 2030. Link to post Share on other sites
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