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I Called In Sick Today


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Back from the windy city.

 

DAMMIT!!! ...

 

Just missed the meet up with Tilt.

 

me too!

 

Ok, I narrowed down the animals region to 21 gifs. Help me eliminate 4 more. (I'm getting down to 17 instead of 16 because they have those stupid play-in games now.)

 

 

 

T3MTI.jpgKIYlSz6.gifanigif_enhanced-buzz-14268-1361377451-5.gif

 

 

z5bNKY1.gif9h2Wj17.gifnPdpKE3.gif

 

kRt5H0S.gifv0oX2.gifu3tHo.gifL4axK.gif

 

al691.gifgigantic-spider-capture.gifAYmRZIh.gif

 

3Ojucv8.gifU1S9U3c.gif1bbGamx.gifrLakkoz.gif

 

GIegOkh.gifBvre738.gifFq9SR.gifTvKx8Wu.gif

 

 

 

I would personally get rid of the shark and the seal dunking for sure. They aren't cute or funny.

 

I know why you have the spider one in there, but I'm meh on that one too. It's like a #16 seed and could easily be cut.

 

I like the elephant.

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and after 3 days, he is risen!

If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

Pocket change cost me my first and only black girlfriend.   It was in the middle of a roaring poker boom and I was flush in ways most men don't even bother dreaming of. Money, it was like dirt to me

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I don't like the spider one because it's pretty obviously fake.

 

I did assume it was fake, but didn't want to stick my neck out with an accusation. You're a man, Shake.

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me too!

 

 

I was planning on calling your bluff if time allowed. But, as I expected, they kept us busy until after 10 pm both nights I was in town. But, meh, if we did meet up and you found out I'm really a decent guy it would just screw up the roles, you know?

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hey ron mexico tim riggins just used the term "ushe". it's now officially cool.

 

and no, don't believe I've ever searched out porn on twitter. I would, however, be up for it.

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then back to his house after the bar to drink more till 4 in the morning....

 

 

 

I sure do love long beans' posts. gotta get that lottery ticket.

 

 

 

 

The parents still there?

 

 

 

I didnt drink around mom for several years. Dunno why. Probably didnt want her to think I was a derelict or something...

 

 

 

Didnt care much after I got out of high school

 

 

 

I know there was some reason I spaced things out so much...

 

 

I'm also an ass man.

 

 

 

I guess I am too...

 

 

 

Everyone says, "Beans...youre an ass, man!"

 

 

 

twitter wormhole of porn sites? I follow one, then you click on something they RT'd, then another, another, then next thing you know, you're looking at preggo-nudes....

 

 

 

Geez... what happened to the old fashioned phone sex?

 

 

 

Called the wife one day and said honey Im comin over to screw your brains out...

 

 

 

She replied... "Who is this?"

 

 

 

Two from Dangerfield... dont forget to take your souvenir napkin with you on your way out of the lounge ladies and gents!

 

 

 

Dont get the preggo stuff...

 

 

 

Didnt touch the wife much after about four or five months in

 

 

 

One night in particular was the last straw until she popped...

 

 

 

"Beans...that was amazing"

 

 

 

"Man...you made a mess of this bed"

 

 

 

"I guess I did get a little wild, huh?"

 

 

 

(Beans turns on light)

 

 

 

"That was the whipped cream"

 

 

 

"Ill change the sheets"

 

 

 

"Just how many fuckin banana splits did you eat this time?"

 

 

 

 

 

Rodney two...Beans nuthin

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speedz you stupid yo

 

 

 

beans: no, parents gone. left yesterday afternoon. didn't drink in front of them. though I don't have a problem with that, it's just I won't smoke in front of them, and when I drink, I pretty much have to smoke, so it's kind of a damned if you do, damned if you don't kind of thing. wait, maybe it's more of a what's good for the good is good for the gander thing. no, I think it should be a one in the hand is worth two in the bush kind of thing.

 

 

I drank beer played poker and watched the fight tonight. I'm tired goodbye.

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Gotta work today. We've been getting killed and if we fall any farther behind they'll have to stop accepting new cases. Which has never happened. So if it does I at least wanna be able to say I was there every day busting out 25 a day. Plus if its just me and the boss here that's excellent brownie points for a future full time position. Right?

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Right.

 

The question is whether that's a good thing or a bad thing.

 

 

Watched the movie Flight last night. By far the best part was the opening scene where the flight attendant he bedded walked around fully nude.

 

The beginning of the fateful flight reminded me a little too much of my last flight out of Tampa, FL.

 

Ours ended much better though.

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Oh. Some of your earlier comments led me to believe you didn't want to be at the block as a career. Carry on.

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Not in my current capacity. But I need to make them want me to stay. That way I have that option. Right now I am their bitch and I will be a good boy and work hard because I have nowhere else to go. And this place isn't my first choice, but I need a real job. And if being here today helps that at all I gotta do it. Plus: overtime baby.

 

And it gets me out of the laundry room two moths out of the year. And that's just fine by me.

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I was planning on calling your bluff if time allowed. But, as I expected, they kept us busy until after 10 pm both nights I was in town. But, meh, if we did meet up and you found out I'm really a decent guy it would just screw up the roles, you know?

 

It wasn't a bluff. I would have picked you up at the airport if needed. Also, I don't ever think I've even implied that I don't think you're a decent guy.

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