New To Poker. In Need Of Guidance!

[Tehtoe 3]

LOL

[James D 0]

this is a vary interesting thread,its grate to see my children at FCP debaiting each otherOP as for you're question let me offer you some advise from a grizzly old veteran,you want to start learned the pokers at a real casino because of the tells and reedsonline im a fish to these tyoung whipper snatchers but live i eat them out because i can zero in on the reeds,one time i was playing a young internet poker wizz who was playing live four his first time and he tried to bluff mebut oh no mister this isnt the internet hear I have the reeds,i put my hand on the tabel and sat they're quietly until i felt his pulse on the green felt,beinga nurse and a poker player yuou can imagined that this was all the information i neededi snip called and took down the pot with five high because i new he was bluffingthis is why OP should start with live pokers to get better because of the reeds

Suggestions to who this is?

[FARGOpokerND 22]

Suggestions to who this is?

Rose

[FARGOpokerND 22]

Rose

Sure could fool me.

[whatgreatis 0]

hof

[NoSup4U 0]

hof

[mase_gotsem 0]

Suggestions to who this is?

OMG this person who ever he is owes me a new dr pepper becouse i spilt mine all over my table .also my top 3 guesses are. spademan, getsprung or bob

[fighter 4]

OMG this person who ever he is owes me a new dr pepper becouse i spilt mine all over my table .also my top 3 guesses are. spademan, getsprung or bob

what random guesses

[bbgun 0]

this is a vary interesting thread,its grate to see my children at FCP debaiting each otherOP as for you're question let me offer you some advise from a grizzly old veteran,you want to start learned the pokers at a real casino because of the tells and reedsonline im a fish to these tyoung whipper snatchers but live i eat them out because i can zero in on the reeds,one time i was playing a young internet poker wizz who was playing live four his first time and he tried to bluff mebut oh no mister this isnt the internet hear I have the reeds,i put my hand on the tabel and sat they're quietly until i felt his pulse on the green felt,beinga nurse and a poker player yuou can imagined that this was all the information i neededi snip called and took down the pot with five high because i new he was bluffingthis is why OP should start with live pokers to get better because of the reeds

Needs at least seven LOLs sprinkled in at random spots IMO...

[bbgun 0]

Always learn to zig before zagging.

Obv works for Allen Cunningham:Allen Cunningham (from his twitter)21k on the last break of the day. Zigging and zagging.

[051103 0]

this is a vary interesting thread,its grate to see my children at FCP debaiting each otherOP as for you're question let me offer you some advise from a grizzly old veteran,you want to start learned the pokers at a real casino because of the tells and reedsonline im a fish to these tyoung whipper snatchers but live i eat them out because i can zero in on the reeds,one time i was playing a young internet poker wizz who was playing live four his first time and he tried to bluff mebut oh no mister this isnt the internet hear I have the reeds,i put my hand on the tabel and sat they're quietly until i felt his pulse on the green felt,beinga nurse and a poker player yuou can imagined that this was all the information i neededi snip called and took down the pot with five high because i new he was bluffingthis is why OP should start with live pokers to get better because of the reeds

[KingJames 11]

Obv works for Allen Cunningham:Allen Cunningham (from his twitter)21k on the last break of the day. Zigging and zagging.

+1

[Gibber 0]

Thread of the Year.

[DemonDonk 0]

LOL at this topic.

[Fade2241 0]

Best JA ever! Someone needs to take credit for that one because it's pure awesomeness!

[GeneralGeeWhiz 0]

Best advice: don't play.edit: joke account/thread?

[GetSprung 0]

OMG this person who ever he is owes me a new dr pepper becouse i spilt mine all over my table .also my top 3 guesses are. spademan, getsprung or bob

Thanks for the consideration but it isn't me. Too busy to put the work into that awesome of a joke account.

[gmanshade 0]

best advice to OP:1) watch gmanshade2) learn poker from him3) become famous4) retire in hawaii

[whatgreatis 0]

best advice to OP:1) watch gmanshade2) learn poker from him3) become famous4) retire in hawaii

hu4rollz?

[CobaltBlue 662]

Jspencer,I know you are taking a lot of flack, and as much as it sucks, it's for the best.When I first joined this forum, I was TERRIBLE at teh poker. I thought I was great. I would beat my friends in home games and I would watch poker on TV and with the help of hole-card cameras, I could make very good decisions. It all seemed so easy.The way I thought about the game, and specific hands was terrible. I thought that winning the pot> extracting value. Along with numerous other thought-processes that were wrong. I remember I responded in a thread in the NL cash game section and I made some really, really dumb comments about how I would have played the hand. My thinking was wrong and the way I presented it was stupid. Zach (Zach6668) E-smacked the shit out of me. He very bluntly told me that my thinking was flawed and if I didn't change the way I thought about the game I would forever be a losing player.I took that to heart. I starting reading, a lot! I've read so many poker books, I've read, and re-read so many threads and posts from players who are clearly doing things right. I lurk a lot more than I post, but I've been soaking up info from FCP and now, 3+ years later, I'm a much improved player. I didn't want to accept it at first, but I was a losing player and now through lots of studying and especially FCP I am a winning player. Not a huge baller in any sense, but I beat low-limit games both online and live.There are a lot of successful and insightful players here at FCP and they are kind enough to share knowledge and help us newbs out...

Just wanted to make sure this didn't get lost in all the LOL. It's a very positive post and brightened my morning. I had somewhat similar experiences years ago.

[trznk 0]

I started reading up on David Sklansky's Theory of Poker because that was the only book I could find on the market.The content is really interesting and really gives the reader a great idea about the complexity of Poker. Honestly it all sounds so damn complicated and I wonder if I'll ever be able to play taking everything that Skalnsky explains into consideration. It's just so much material to remember. What are your thoughts on this? Do you get the "hang" of it in time? Should I take lots of notes so I can memorize most of the theory? Should I consider starting out with another book? Maybe more suited for beginners.Another question I have is about the calculators for online games. I saw many sites offering this software. They state that following the advice you win in the long run. Well, if everyone uses the software (or most of the players) online, then how can anyone win in the long run? How do you develop your own style if you just play by the odds and follow the advice? What is your general opinion about this kind of software?Thank youtrznk

[Balloon guy 158]

I started reading up on David Sklansky's Theory of Poker because that was the only book I could find on the market.The content is really interesting and really gives the reader a great idea about the complexity of Poker. Honestly it all sounds so damn complicated and I wonder if I'll ever be able to play taking everything that Skalnsky explains into consideration. It's just so much material to remember. What are your thoughts on this? Do you get the "hang" of it in time? Should I take lots of notes so I can memorize most of the theory? Should I consider starting out with another book? Maybe more suited for beginners.Another question I have is about the calculators for online games. I saw many sites offering this software. They state that following the advice you win in the long run. Well, if everyone uses the software (or most of the players) online, then how can anyone win in the long run? How do you develop your own style if you just play by the odds and follow the advice? What is your general opinion about this kind of software?Thank youtrznk

Imo Skalansky is a child molesting wanker...and his books are over analyzed tripe to impress himself.Dan Harrington is a better source for poker information. And as much as everyone hates him and his book, Phil Hellmuth's Play Poker Like the Pros is an excellant beginners guide because of his easy to read and understand style. Later you should try to forget most of what he says, but I know many people that admit that PPLTPs was a foundational book for them.And yes...mathmatically perfect poker is not real, it's exploitable and boring. People have made 'bots' that played on online sites using this method and have made money, but you might as well drive the speed limit and eat tofurkey for Thanksgiving. If you plan on playing 40 hours a day, 5 days a week, 50 weeks a year, then mathmatically correct calls will come into play much more often. They are not the only informaion, but they are an important part.But if you are a recreational player, like most of us, then the odds are much less important to our desire to suck out against an idiot who sucked out on us earlier. I mean how good would it be to flip up 4 2 off when you called a raise from the sb from an early poistion raiser who had AQ and you called him down on an A 3 Q flop and hit your 5 on the river and you raise him all in and he calls...the IDIOT.

[Scriptpro727 0]

Wise words from BG but let's not get too serious. This thread is f'ing hilarious!!!

[KingJames 11]

<3 cobaltblue

I started reading up on David Sklansky's Theory of Poker because that was the only book I could find on the market.The content is really interesting and really gives the reader a great idea about the complexity of Poker. Honestly it all sounds so damn complicated and I wonder if I'll ever be able to play taking everything that Skalnsky explains into consideration. It's just so much material to remember. What are your thoughts on this? Do you get the "hang" of it in time? Should I take lots of notes so I can memorize most of the theory? Should I consider starting out with another book? Maybe more suited for beginners.Another question I have is about the calculators for online games. I saw many sites offering this software. They state that following the advice you win in the long run. Well, if everyone uses the software (or most of the players) online, then how can anyone win in the long run? How do you develop your own style if you just play by the odds and follow the advice? What is your general opinion about this kind of software?Thank youtrznk

After you read a book, read another one, then re-read the first.Also, I agree with BG that Harrington's stuff is awesome, whether you chose tournament play or cash-games, he'll set you in the right direction.Well, most people don't win, because they don't play well. Plus 24>AQ ainec

[BaseJester 1]

And yes...mathmatically perfect poker is not real, it's exploitable and boring. People have made 'bots' that played on online sites using this method and have made money, but you might as well drive the speed limit and eat tofurkey for Thanksgiving. If you plan on playing 40 hours a day, 5 days a week, 50 weeks a year, then mathmatically correct calls will come into play much more often. They are not the only informaion, but they are an important part.But if you are a recreational player, like most of us, then the odds are much less important to our desire to suck out against an idiot who sucked out on us earlier. I mean how good would it be to flip up 4 2 off when you called a raise from the sb from an early poistion raiser who had AQ and you called him down on an A 3 Q flop and hit your 5 on the river and you raise him all in and he calls...the IDIOT.

This is stupid on purpose in an effort to be funny, right?