I Called In Sick Today

[iZuma 764]

maybe we should the fashion criticism to those who are allowed to sex his or her girlfriend on his or her birthday you think maybe?

[Napa Lite 3,278]

So, my cube is the 2nd in a row from a major walkway and my "boss" is in the cube between me and the row and so whenever I'm bs'ing with him it's like a Wilson/Tim Taylor situation where I'm resting my arms on the divider and facing the walkway. This isn't a problem except for when my bro from the cubicle row over goes to the bathroom and on his way back we almost always end up meeting stares, cause were alpha as ****, and then have to do the slight head nod up to acknowledge our bro-ness. And so not only do I look like an idiot to my boss because I randomly just nod now and then while talking to him but I know this dude just got done pissing and so I'm basically saying "hey, hope you had a good piss". I hope no one reads this. Spent to much time typing to not hit submit. I just have a hunch that at least SA21 will understand. I sound like (am) a crazy person. Really bored today.

[speedz99 145]

25 yr wedding anniversary today. Spent the night last night at a hotel/casino where the wife took the one armed bandits for $1,300.Oh, and sexy time? Why yes, yes there was.

That's a nice trifecta right there.

Congrats on your respective anniversary's Brv and other dude. Mrs Brv is definitely a saint and Mrs Again is probabaly also a saint, although I don't know if I buy you guys have been married 25 years and not "you guys dated for a bit and you just never left despite her giving you the silent treatment for the past 24 years".

Yeah, glad I made it through the mess of the paragraph before this.

the first few times, hell, you can bet your sweet ass i laughed off the look and fell right to sleep. but after a while, it starts to haunt you. it gets to tearing at a mans foundation. i reckon it destroys you in the end.

Don't give up, my freaky little friend. Don't ever give up.I do imagine SA21 to be little. Or tall and lanky. Whatever height he is, it's definitely not average. Or it's exactly average. Not fat, but not particularly muscular. I don't know what I'm saying.

Unless there were/are extenuating circumstances, my recommendation would be to think long and hard about marrying a woman that doesn't want as much sexy time as you while you're dating/living together. Because, just like she's not going to be able to get you to all of a sudden start throwing your nasty drawers in the laundry basket instead of on the floor, she's not going to all of a sudden change into a nympho after you put the ring on her finger.Every guy I know that didn't follow the above advice is lucky to get much more than birthday and anniversary sexy time after the vows.

This is actually very solid advice. Unless you're miserable about your sexual performance, a la a few of our brethren here, in which case they should find women who aren't that into sex anyway.

!

Do they not believe in bridges? Or do rivers just spring up any place, any time?

i've been making an effort lately (and probably failing) to not make fun of something that i've never seen or heard or whatever. like if someone is talking about how great that new nickelback album is i dont want to be a negative nancy and bring shame down on them unless i've actually listened to the album. so i wont say anything. well the other day i happened to see that one of the twilight movies was on showtime or hbo or somewhere, so i said to myself, you've been hating on this thing for years and you've never even watched five minutes of it. so i watched five minutes of it and it was the worst thing in the history of things. if you, or someone you know, like twilight i should be allowed to punch you right in the face, as many times as i like.another thing i don't like is people standing in the walkways of a restaurant. like hey dude, there's other people in the world - move over two goddamn feet so i can squeeze by. but no. this fuck in his cheap ass slacks and shirt with shoes that dont go at all with those pants is gonna block my way. so now i'm the dickbag when i have to say excuse me sir can i get by you anytime this year if you find that agreeable. goddamn people.

I say any woman would be lucky to have you disappoint her in the sack.

maybe we should the fashion criticism to those who are allowed to sex his or her girlfriend on his or her birthday you think maybe?

Haha.

[SuitedAces21 2,722]

So, my cube is the 2nd in a row from a major walkway and my "boss" is in the cube between me and the row and so whenever I'm bs'ing with him it's like a Wilson/Tim Taylor situation where I'm resting my arms on the divider and facing the walkway. This isn't a problem except for when my bro from the cubicle row over goes to the bathroom and on his way back we almost always end up meeting stares, cause were alpha as ****, and then have to do the slight head nod up to acknowledge our bro-ness. And so not only do I look like an idiot to my boss because I randomly just nod now and then while talking to him but I know this dude just got done pissing and so I'm basically saying "hey, hope you had a good piss". I hope no one reads this. Spent to much time typing to not hit submit. I just have a hunch that at least SA21 will understand. I sound like (am) a crazy person. Really bored today.

yeah i know exactly what you are talking about.

I do imagine SA21 to be little. Or tall and lanky. Whatever height he is, it's definitely not average. Or it's exactly average. Not fat, but not particularly muscular. I don't know what I'm saying.

i would say i'm decidedly average in almost every respect (and below average in the others). DJ and guapy have seen a photo of me, so they can confirm if they so choose. but i'm about five ten and 2 bills. i mean i can blend into a crowd with the best of them.

[DJ Vu 176]

i would say i'm decidedly average in almost every respect (and below average in the others). DJ and guapy have seen a photo of me, so they can confirm if they so choose.

Nah, you weren't below average.

[Napa Lite 3,278]

Well now I'm not sure if you do or are being sarcastic. Leaning towards sarcastic.

[SuitedAces21 2,722]

no sarcasm at all. i know about awkward work convos, especially ones involving the bathroom. nothing worse than pissing next to the president while trying to make small talk. or the knowing nods exchanged between two grown men on the same pee schedule.

[The Ocho 970]

maybe we should the fashion criticism to those who are allowed to sex his or her girlfriend on his or her birthday you think maybe?

Lets not get too hasty here. guy.SA21 throws a nice ball, that's all I gotta say.

[speedz99 145]

i would say i'm decidedly average in almost every respect

I knew it!Was reading an article about Tom Brady and ran across this:

HE ONCE HAD SIMPLE DREAMSIn those pride-swallowing days at the University of Michigan, when he was constantly trying to prove that he deserved to start, Brady used to sit up at night with his good friend Aaron Shea and talk about what they'd do when they made it big.Shea, a tight end for the Wolverines, used to rattle off the typical 20-year-old dream purchases. He wanted a Hummer and a Ferrari. Then Shea would ask what Brady wanted."'If I hit it real big,'" Shea recalls Brady telling him, "'I want to be able to wake up, put a pair of socks on, and at the end of the day, I throw 'em away.'"I'm like, 'That's all you want?' And he goes, 'Yeah, that's what I want. I love new socks.'"

You know, I really hear what he's saying. I'd also want that...I mean, I'd want more than that, but I'd want that too.

[speedz99 145]

Do any of you watch Eastbound and Down? Is that something I should be getting into? I feel like it is.

[Napa Lite 3,278]

The first season was great. Season two was ok to pretty good. Haven't seen any new episodes if there has been any.

[mk 11]

You know, I really hear what he's saying. I'd also want that...I mean, I'd want more than that, but I'd want that too.

feet are just super grodie.

[DJ Vu 176]

feet are just super grodie.

So I guess your lady friend never gets a foot massage? Interesting...

[SuitedAces21 2,722]

i think the question then becomes: would mk be alright with his no sexing lady getting a foot massage from another dude?

[Ron_Mexico 4,219]

I have a head cold and I just tried having sex so I could breath out my nose. Success! Mex is a genius.

Finally

25 yr wedding anniversary today. Spent the night last night at a hotel/casino where the wife took the one armed bandits for $1,300 while I busted out of a poker tournament 2 before the bubble before we left..Oh, and sexy time? Why yes, yes there was.

who knew you were that old? Kudos

Shameless Man wouldn't care about those looks.SM: Was it good for you?Woman: Was what goo-...that was it?SM: Great! Hahaha!Edit: I care a little bit that almost nobody is going to understand this post.

I LOVE when Hoch says "GREAT"Slays me every time. He's sneaky funny

Unless there were/are extenuating circumstances, my recommendation would be to think long and hard about marrying a womanthat doesn't want as much sexy time as you while you're dating/living together. Because, just like she's not going to be able to get you to all of a sudden start throwing your nasty drawers in the laundry basket instead of on the floor, she's not going to all of a sudden change into a nympho after you put the ring on her finger.Every guy I know that didn't follow the above advice is lucky to get much more than birthday and anniversary sexy time after the vows.

Absolutely. It tapers, so that's why I adore loose women. I get what I want mostly when I want it. I have a friend who said he only got beejs on Bday, Xmas, etc. and his wife is a stay at home wife, and he's always at Tiffany's on the stupid girl holidays. Effff that shit. I asked why he doesn't lay down some law. He said he prefers jerking off to deep throat porn more than sex, for the most part. He's just north of 50.

i think the question then becomes: would mk be alright with his no sexing lady getting a foot massage from another dude?

He'd toss the dude out of a window

[Ron_Mexico 4,219]

I always take the opportunity to see new boobs of girls, make out with them when drunk. Girlfriend doesn't get phased by it, fortunately.

[DJ Vu 176]

I gotcha, you've got a great girlfriend who gives you sex anytime, I gotcha, and she lets you do whatever you want, I gotcha, and to you cold medicine is a blowjob, I gotcha.

[Ron_Mexico 4,219]

Blake Griffen is havin fun. He's eating it up

[SuitedAces21 2,722]

now i see why ronnny mex hasnt been around much. he's been having a sexy time free-for-all with this lady friend.

[Napa_Don 688]

No idea who is in your avatar Suity but it reminded me that I thought about this video and meant to watch it, but then forgot.

[InternetExplorer 2,609]

DJV lets nothing slip through the cracks.that wallpaper folder is incredible with windows 7, seriously. I've since added some more stuff, it'll probably get to be a few GB before I'm dead and gone.I've never understood all the people that collect sexy nude girl wallpapers. suddenly you gotta worry about ever showing anyone your screen.

[SuitedAces21 2,722]

i'll check that video out at time to be determined at a later moment.and my avatar is the pride of all nebraska, ALEX GORDON. i'll never forget his first major league at bat: opening day 2007. the red sox were in town. gordo's debut was so hyped, people were calling him the next george brett. but why not, he'd been the college player of the year at nebraska. the minor league player of the year after killing it in AA and AAA. he grew up a royals fan. it was perfect. so he comes to the plate in his debut, bases loaded. curt schilling is on the mound - and he strikes out. very dissapointing.but i still love him. even though the idiots in this organization did everything they could to fuck him up.

[InternetExplorer 2,609]

we went to a royals game in 2007, secretly I just wanted to see gordon. he had been demoted to the minors by that point, or it was an injury, or something. either way, it sucked and I'm never going back.

[DJ Vu 176]

I went to a Royals game back when Carlos Beltran was still there.

[InternetExplorer 2,609]

I went to a Royals game back when Carlos Beltran was still there.

yeah, same. I think it was summer 2004, or something. I'm definitely within easy driving distance, and the K isn't so bad, but baseball in general is just such a bad product for smaller markets that don't have crazy-innovative front offices.uneducated baseball opinion warning