How To Drive

[Dread Aidan 8]

granderson rules

"The people who stand on an escalator in such a way as to take up the entire step..."Oh yeah, definitely screw those guys."This week we celebrated the 7 billionth person being born..."We did? Like ever? That would seem way, way too low a number. Is the world's population 7 billion right now? Yeah, that probably makes more sense. But how do you calculate such a thing? Then you'd have to know the status of everybody in the world. If the 7 billionth person was born, but then somebody immediately afterwards dies, do we celebrate the 7 billionth again? What kind of celebration are we talking about anyway? Were there fireworks? I...have a lot of questions about this little throwaway line.Edit: lol commentsJim8I think the worst is the driver who tailgates at 5 over the speed limit because they want to go 25 over. Usually it's a full sized pickup or SUV.MBarHthe speed limit here is 110km/h, I rather enjoy going 120 in the left lane driving through the city, while the city people ride your *** trying to go 140 weaving in an out of traffic just to exit right on the next exit, as far as im concerned the left lane is mine since im passing through, and anyone exiting should stay right, most accidents are caused by idi ots changing lanes DirksterMy problem with the car analogy. What if I'm going the upper speed limit and everyone else is going faster? Why should I move out of the way? The people around me are making the situation unsafe by driving over the limit and I'm supposed to accomodate them? The ONLY people that get my attention when they are speeding are Emergency Vehicles and Police and THEN only if they are flashing there lights. Everyone else can either enjoy the day or run the risk of a speeding ticket in the right lane. dutchinchicaDeal. If you guys stop driving one foot behind my car when I do 70 in a 65 zone and endangering my babies lives just to get to your destination a few seconds earlier.horsepuckyF 'those in hurry' - plan U time better!!DMesirowi could write an equally or more effective article not only about how annoying fast drivers are, but also how they actually pose a problem for people's safety.

[Dubey 1,035]

granderson rules

"The thing is there are about 312 million people in the United States and roughly 250 million registered vehicles. There will always be somebody somewhere driving faster ... it's easier for everyone to just let them."This pretty much sums up my philosophy on the left lane.

[iZuma 764]

oh my god I hope all of those commenters get anal cancer

[SBriand 4]

"The people who stand on an escalator in such a way as to take up the entire step..."Oh yeah, definitely screw those guys."This week we celebrated the 7 billionth person being born..."We did? Like ever? That would seem way, way too low a number. Is the world's population 7 billion right now? Yeah, that probably makes more sense. But how do you calculate such a thing? Then you'd have to know the status of everybody in the world. If the 7 billionth person was born, but then somebody immediately afterwards dies, do we celebrate the 7 billionth again? What kind of celebration are we talking about anyway? Were there fireworks? I...have a lot of questions about this little throwaway line.Edit: lol commentsJim8I think the worst is the driver who tailgates at 5 over the speed limit because they want to go 25 over. Usually it's a full sized pickup or SUV.MBarHthe speed limit here is 110km/h, I rather enjoy going 120 in the left lane driving through the city, while the city people ride your *** trying to go 140 weaving in an out of traffic just to exit right on the next exit, as far as im concerned the left lane is mine since im passing through, and anyone exiting should stay right, most accidents are caused by idi ots changing lanes DirksterMy problem with the car analogy. What if I'm going the upper speed limit and everyone else is going faster? Why should I move out of the way? The people around me are making the situation unsafe by driving over the limit and I'm supposed to accomodate them? The ONLY people that get my attention when they are speeding are Emergency Vehicles and Police and THEN only if they are flashing there lights. Everyone else can either enjoy the day or run the risk of a speeding ticket in the right lane. dutchinchicaDeal. If you guys stop driving one foot behind my car when I do 70 in a 65 zone and endangering my babies lives just to get to your destination a few seconds earlier.horsepuckyF 'those in hurry' - plan U time better!!DMesirowi could write an equally or more effective article not only about how annoying fast drivers are, but also how they actually pose a problem for people's safety.

Dirkster is an idiot and makes me extrememly angry for some reason. His recent comment:Out of curiousity and the 960+ comments so far is anyone actually a police officer who could comment? The other argument for not moving over and not speeding along with traffic. 1 - it takes me out of my comfort zone and makes it harder for me to drive. 2 - what if my hwy or ramp connection is NOT in the right lane? I'm going to use the lane that allows me to get where I need to go without speeding.Really, your comfort zone is the left lane and moving one lane over will make driving difficult? What a boob. #2 is just stupid because that is not what the issue at hand is. And really, at least around me, I can only think of 2 or 3 left hand exits on our major highways. Regarding # people born and such...http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-15391515

[brvheart 1,752]

oh my god I hope all of those commenters get anal cancer

That's going way too easy on them. I'm shuddering because I hate them so badly.

[BaseJester 1]

[SBriand 4]

wow, only looks like he hit 4 cars. Not bad.

[Dubey 1,035]

I hate when I let somebody in. Either changing lanes, or at a yield sign, and they don't wave to acknowledge.

[iZuma 764]

that is aggrevating, an it reminds me of another: when you're on a 4 lane highway and somebody's coming out of an exit ramp right beside you, so you get over to let them out, and the turd snorter speeds up really quickly and won't let you back over.

[SuperJon 175]

i hate it when people stare at me on the highway while i'm trying to jerk off

[brvheart 1,752]

wow, only looks like he hit 4 cars. Not bad.

Wait, you see that picture? I don't.

[SBriand 4]

It's a gif and yes I see it.Immma busssImmma bussssuck my dickIm a bus!

[brvheart 1,752]

It's a gif and yes I see it.Immma busssImmma bussssuck my dickIm a bus!

I don't know what this means.

[Dread Aidan 8]

I don't know what this means.

Does this work for you?Because it's very great.

[brvheart 1,752]

Does this work for you?Because it's very great.

Ah... yes, that's works... and you're correct.

[JubilantLankyLad 1,957]

[BigDMcGee 3,352]

The Slow Roll:You're in a two lane street or highway, where you have a solid yellow line between lanes, or in general passing is in practical. The posted speed limit is 35 miles an hour. Or 40. or w/e. The person ahead of you is going 5-15 miles under the posted speedlimit, and there's nothing you can do. You can't pass legally. Maybe you would consider doing it illegally but there's just too much traffic. Typically the slow rolling is 75+ and should be turned into soylent green, not driving a car. This used to be the thing that made me the angriest in life. Just set me on raging tilt. And then, I had an epiphany. I should not be getting this angry about this. I'm not going anywhere so fast that I have to be there 30 seconds sooner than I normally would of because this old geezer is afraid to drive 30. So you know what I did? IF you can't beat them, join them... I started slow rolling people myself, and let me tell you, it is hilarious. My favorite technique was act like I was confused about a neighborhood.. turn my turning signal on, slow way down as if I'm going to turn... and then don't turn. Do it again, and again and again, at each cross street, squinting at each one, as if I'm looking for something. People get so angry. One time, I was in the cars, "taking her down a notch" with a couple friends in teh car, and we are just howling laughing because i'm going like 20 in 35, and this guy in a giant SUV is riding dangerously close to my bumper. So finally, we get to a stop light, and the streetchanges from a 2 to 4 lane street at that intersection so the guy pulls up beside us. And he's just this big, burly guy, scowling at us and we all just start laughing at his sour look> and he's like "Hey, what in the **** are you guys doing?" And we laugh some more... and he's like " I'm a ****ing cop, you assholes. I should bring you in.. " and starts waving his wallet at us, and we just laugh some more, because obviously he was off duty, it was like 10 at night or something, and he had a woman in the car with him. We just can't stop laughing. So the light changes, and the guy zoom peels off, obviously speeding and driving wrecklessly.Listen, I know what you're all thinking. Gosh, That mcgee's a horrible *******. Moonlanding. But let me tell you something. If you're having just a rotten day and you need something to cheer you up.... try going 20 in a 35, and check out how angry it makes people, at how many honks and dirty looks you get, over something that, really, shouldn't make people THAT angry. The best part of the slow roll is, after you get that first honk... you really discover what kind of person you are. Are you the kind of person that's going to cave at the social pressure of the honk.. or are you going to use that honk as the single to.... ease 'er down a notch, and slip from 25 to 20. You really get to know yourself in moments like that.

[ShakeZuma 585]

somebody's gonna shoot you

[BigDMcGee 3,352]

somebody's gonna shoot you

get serious, I live in lincoln, not inglewood.

[mrdannyg 274]

The Slow Roll:You're in a two lane street or highway, where you have a solid yellow line between lanes, or in general passing is in practical. The posted speed limit is 35 miles an hour. Or 40. or w/e. The person ahead of you is going 5-15 miles under the posted speedlimit, and there's nothing you can do. You can't pass legally. Maybe you would consider doing it illegally but there's just too much traffic. Typically the slow rolling is 75+ and should be turned into soylent green, not driving a car. This used to be the thing that made me the angriest in life. Just set me on raging tilt. And then, I had an epiphany. I should not be getting this angry about this. I'm not going anywhere so fast that I have to be there 30 seconds sooner than I normally would of because this old geezer is afraid to drive 30. So you know what I did? IF you can't beat them, join them... I started slow rolling people myself, and let me tell you, it is hilarious. My favorite technique was act like I was confused about a neighborhood.. turn my turning signal on, slow way down as if I'm going to turn... and then don't turn. Do it again, and again and again, at each cross street, squinting at each one, as if I'm looking for something. People get so angry. One time, I was in the cars, "taking her down a notch" with a couple friends in teh car, and we are just howling laughing because i'm going like 20 in 35, and this guy in a giant SUV is riding dangerously close to my bumper. So finally, we get to a stop light, and the streetchanges from a 2 to 4 lane street at that intersection so the guy pulls up beside us. And he's just this big, burly guy, scowling at us and we all just start laughing at his sour look> and he's like "Hey, what in the **** are you guys doing?" And we laugh some more... and he's like " I'm a ****ing cop, you assholes. I should bring you in.. " and starts waving his wallet at us, and we just laugh some more, because obviously he was off duty, it was like 10 at night or something, and he had a woman in the car with him. We just can't stop laughing. So the light changes, and the guy zoom peels off, obviously speeding and driving wrecklessly.Listen, I know what you're all thinking. Gosh, That mcgee's a horrible *******. Moonlanding. But let me tell you something. If you're having just a rotten day and you need something to cheer you up.... try going 20 in a 35, and check out how angry it makes people, at how many honks and dirty looks you get, over something that, really, shouldn't make people THAT angry. The best part of the slow roll is, after you get that first honk... you really discover what kind of person you are. Are you the kind of person that's going to cave at the social pressure of the honk.. or are you going to use that honk as the single to.... ease 'er down a notch, and slip from 25 to 20. You really get to know yourself in moments like that.

I read this post just before leaving for some groceries. On my way home, I swear someone pulled this on me...in a Porsche. Complete with pretending to look for an address, even though they were driving along a stretch of road with absolutely nowhere to pull in...they just randomly kept slowing way down.I got a good laugh thinking of BigD driving along a rural road in Atlantic Canada in a Porsche and randomly slowing down with one person behind him.

[ShakeZuma 585]

you should've shot him

[speedz99 145]

The Slow Roll:

I'm all for being amused by other peoples' irrational anger, but please tell me you stopped doing that once you hit 18.

[BigDMcGee 3,352]

I'm all for being amused by other peoples' irrational anger, but please tell me you stopped doing that once you hit 18.

Oh, no no no. I typically only do it if I have someone else in the car with me, that it will embarrassed and but will end up laughing. Special ladies for example will pretend to disapprove, but end up laughing hysterically. I even did it when my mom was in the car one time, and I thought she was going to hurt herself she was laughing so hard. It really is funny.

[SuitedAces21 2,722]

i only do that when i'm driving the limit and some fucknut is on my ass anyways. i'll drop it down to a crawl just to piss them off. it's the best.

[BigDMcGee 3,352]

i only do that when i'm driving the limit and some fucknut is on my ass anyways. i'll drop it down to a crawl just to piss them off. it's the best.

I can't lie, someone hugging my bumper has triggered a slow roll a time or two.