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need help from anyone who is funny or clever.


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I know this is not poker related but I respect the humour and intelligence of the posters on this board so I thought I would put this one out there.the story is...We are building a new office space and we have this one huge 12 ft x 36 ft wall that we are going to have a professional mural painter come in and paint the wall with thousands of sayings, jokes, anecdotes, quotes etc.If anyone has something that would work on a project like this please post.there are no limitations except that they can't be offensive.please post as much as you can.thanks all.If I can get a final list of what ends up on the wall I will post it in March.

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First things first...You can start off by encouraging everyone to greet each other with "pogue mahone." It's a Gaelic phrase that means...ah...."have a good day." LMAOshhhh....quiet rkard

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sorry cant help you. maybe if you had asked in limerick form...
hahahahahahha!!!! You and your silly limericks... :-DI also want to know what kind of business this is. Sounds like you have a cool boss though, letting you have a whole wall that's not the color white!
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What type of business?Any specific theme?I have a funny and clever "friend" who may be able to help!
we are a Marketing company...but there is no limitation to theme...absolutely anything is allowed that won't be offensive.some of the things that have already been submitted by colleagues have included.Simpsons quotesJack HandyismsDostoyevsky(sp?)Inspirational thoughtsProfound thoughtsSesame Street quote.John Stewart quotemade up thoughts.As you can see it can run into any theme.I appreciate anything you can give me.take care and by all means get your funny and clever friend to give me the good stuff!KK
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sorry cant help you. maybe if you had asked in limerick form...
lol...I actually quoted a couple of the limericks from that thread...
For crediting purposes....if you used any of mine....please use any of the following;digitalmonkeyd. monkeyD. McCarthyThank you!
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First things first...You can start off by encouraging everyone to greet each other with "pogue mahone." It's a Gaelic phrase that means...ah...."have a good day." LMAOshhhh....quiet rkard
lmao :wink: ....kiss my arse has already been suggested, but we reserve that saying for our client services dept. to use at thier own discretion.
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aw man.... the best jack handy is the one where it is the kid walking alone to school on a cold day..... thinking about life and whatnot.then, all of the sudden, a car comes by and splashes him with a puddle.....he stands there in shock... doesnt move. (completely seems like the kid is the narrator... lol)"so i drove by and splashed him again"

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How about:"I don't want to sell anything, buy anything, or process anything as a career. I don't want to sell anything bought or processed, or buy anything sold or processed, or process anything sold, bought, or processed, or repair anything sold, bought, or processed. You know, as a career, I don't want to do that. " Lloyd Dobler (John Cusack) in Say Anything!

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I once entered ten puns into a pun writing contest, hoping that one pun would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.(Think about it.)
punch yourself for me :-)
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"OK, so what is the speed of dark?""I almost had a psychic girlfriend, but she left me before we met.""Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now."-Steven Wright"If you mail a letter to the post office, who mails it?""I'm not concerned about all hell breaking loose, but that PART of hell will break loose....it'll be much harder to detect.""Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that."-George CarlinObviously a big fan of both.

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