Death, Grief, And The Afterlife

[hank213 1,823]

Okay you may have to bear with me here, it's been some time since I've brushed up on the ole Logic/Philosophy skills. I'll try and keep the rambling to a minimum but there's no guarantee.About a month ago my grandmother passed away after a few years of failing health due to age. I was her only grandchild and we had a very close relationship. She was a kind woman, generous of spirit and, all told, a good person. I say that because if I subscribe to the beliefs of one of most major religions, shouldn't I see her passing as a positive and be happy for her rather than bemoan the end of her life?The way I've been thinking about it is like so:1. Most religions believe in a +/- afterlife, heaven, hell, what have you.2. I believe that the recently departed was a good person 3. It is believed that good people have a + afterlife experience.Thus, I should believe that this person will end up on the + side in the afterlife and should be happy for them.I don't maybe this whole thread is mental masturbation for me trying to come up with a reason that I wasn't particularly devastated or anything about her dying.Thoughts?

[Loismustdie 0]

Grief is a neccesary human emotion whatever you believe happens after death. I have friends that I am positive died and went to hell and those who I am sure went to heaven. Both were grieved for equally. Interesting thing about grief it is purely personal.. some grieve longer, more intense than others,but it's entirely your thing. You should feel whatever it is you feel.

[ghoti 0]

Another possibility is that since she had years of failing health you had years to grieve and gain acceptance of her passing before the end and there would have been no sharp and sudden loss when she finally died. At least that is very much how I felt about the deaths of both of my grandmothers under similar situations. My condolences.

[KramitDaToad 0]

I don't maybe this whole thread is mental masturbation for me trying to come up with a reason that I wasn't particularly devastated or anything about her dying.Thoughts?

Condolences for your loss.What you are going through, the lack of 'expected' emotion is fairly common. I am guessing at some stage soon you be hit by a wall of emotion and you will be free to grieve from there. For some people it can take many months, but I'm fairly confident it will happen.Don't stress it

[scram 1]

Grief is simply the human intellect having a tantrum over that which it cannot change.Those who have come to accept death as an inevitable and natural part of the cycle tend to be less susceptible to excessive displays of grief. Sadness? Of course. It's OK to be sad when someone you love dies and you know you will never see them again.Loss? Of course you're going to feel a sense of loss when you lose someone so important to you.Grief? Out of grief comes various mitigatory rationalizations that in turn give birth to superstitions like a concept of an "afterlife" or "reincarnation".No, no, they really aren't gone "forever"! I'll see grandma again when we're both reborn as magpies or maybe marmots! Or when we meet up in that mysterious place in the clouds where people go when they die! Because they really aren't dead!They're in the magical sky lounge, waiting for us to get there!It's totally understandable that people go to such lengths to ease their grief, but it can be a bit pathetic to watch.Of course, we all know grandma is going to die (after all; that's what grandmas do), so it can be a bit easier to brush off when it finally manifests. Come back when your wife dies, or your kid... Then, lets see how "logical" you are about the whole thing. (in that last sentence, I was speaking to myself)