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Everything posted by Max_Powers

  1. A table breaks just when some donkey sucks out and busts you and you never get a chance to tell him he's a f*cking moron.
  2. Genius? Not quite.A real genius would have surfed some porn and rubbed one out while in there.
  3. His luck box is powered by the will of Jesus.God takes a keen interest in poker tournaments.
  4. That's weird. I was just wondering why my butthole makes my finger smell like my belly button. Small world.
  5. Why haven't they invented some sort of cold-activated label for beer, perhaps something that would turn from silver to blue, to let me know if my beer is the right temperature to drink?I'm sick of f*cking touching beer to figure out if its cold enough.And I'll be dammed if I'm going to make any assumptions based on how long the beer's been in my fridge.
  7. I like the sound of this. I may or may not get high.
  8. I found $65 bucks on Bodog I forgot that I had....So what to do but bet it all on Memphis!!!Go GO GO
  9. Just had the misfortune of watching a few minutes of the Big Bang theory waiting for the NCAA championship to start. Do the people who write that show actually think its funny? Or are they just willing to turn out a pile of crap to make a buck? Willing to accept mediocrity in their work, like the rest of us? Just wondering
  10. When swimming in the ocean, lake, etc I love to just let 'er rip and piss my swim trunks. It really is quite satisfying. I try to hold off in the swimming pool, though. Occasionally a good pee in the shower can't be resisted.So what I'm saying is don't knock it till you try it:***Too lazy to post picture of Depends *******
  11. Not a rick rollOr is it the new rick roll?
  12. OK I said fold, and I was right!Finally, I know for sure I'm good enough to quit my job and head to Vegas. Certainly I'm among a small minority who could make a world class lay-down there.Thanks OP
  13. So you play Q10 clubs, and end up making the second nut flush. What more do you want? Isn't this one of the best boards you could hope for? If you don't like your spot here dont play q10 suited. Yeah, you lost and that sucks but it happens.
  14. I think you have to seriously consider the possibility that your entire universe is a merely a virtual reality program created by evil robot overlords for the purpose of using your body as a battery. This way they have the energy to continue being evil robot overlords. At that point the legitimacy on online poker becomes the least of your worries.
  15. So back in college I rented a house with a few buddies. Next door lived an English lady, the English lady’s mother, and her 20-something son Timmy who still lived at home. Rounding out the cast was Michael, an overweight and extremely effeminate friend of the family next door. Michael was very frequently present at the house next door, and no one was ever really sure about the nature of his relationship to them. We were pretty certain that Timmy wasn’t gay so the whole thing was a mystery. One night Timmy passed out drunk at out house. Someone in the group took the opportunity to write “F*CK M
  16. Max_Powers


    There once was a man named Horatio,Who hoped to achieve auto-felatio,So he bent at the back,But he found that he lacked,The proper stretch to penis-size ratio.
  17. I've never done anything like this before. Just a combination of the beat, douchebags at my table, and some other sh*tty stuff thats happened to me recently. No big deal. But, seriously, I'll be getting a standard mouse next time. I really never liked the wireless that much anyway.
  18. Its not my dog. Its my roomate's dog. Hes a extremely fat and stupid chocolate lab mut who licks his own bunghole on a regular basis. He won't sweat my fingers or the battery.
  19. Cordless mice are far too tempting to chuck across the room, causing them to shatter against the wall, sending one of the batteries to fly into the dog bowl and land with a sad plooping noise then forcing you to reach in to icky doggslobber water to get the battery and experience regret mixed with a certain satisfaction.
  20. LOL at those who say this could never happen. Let me paint you a picture.Six wealth businessmen agree to play a one table tourney, each putting up 6.83 million and agreeing to the prize structure mentioned.Player one, on hand one, looks down to see AA. In an effort to mix up his play, he open-shoves.Player two looks down to see KK. He figures the only hands that could push like that are smaller pairs and possibly AK. Either way he figures to be a huge favorite, so he calls.Player three read somewhere that you should never fold a all in bet preflop if given 2-1 odds, so he makes the auto-all wi
  21. Why do you think he wears the hat, dark sunglasses, etc??To stare at women's boobs without being detected, obv
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