Secret Tapes From The Cheap Thieves Meetings

[Balloon guy 158]

When I returned from my vacation, I found this brown covered bag in the backyard. My dog had chewed it up a bit so I hope it's all here.***Start Transmission****DN: Okay, time to start the meeting. Congratulations guys on my winning the division title. You guys all got what you wanted.. a free ride into the money. You are wlecome.Jayboogie: Wait now, I didn't exactly ride all the way in.Cfinn: I may have lost one match, but I was there every week and gave you much needed support.Waffles: I got a free ride, mostly.DN: Mostly..heheheCfinn: What?DN: Nothing.jayboogie: What are you two laughing about?Waffles: Should we tell them?DN: Go ahead, tell them. It was pretty smart on my part.Waffles: Well...last week I took a little trip to North Carolina.Cfinn: What's in North Carolina?Waffles: No_Neckjayboogie: No_Neck from Cigar Lovers?Waffles: Yep, He was out drinking and I gave him a little ' incentive' not to show up for the last match.Cfinn: That's why he forfieted? Because you mugged him?Waffles: No I didn't mug him. I just bet some guys $500 that they wouldn't mug him. And I lost the bet.Cfinn: Why would you do that? They couldn't win the division, they were at best going to get a wildcard shot, which was doubtful anyway. DN: Let's just say that maybe this will finally shut up Balloon guy. Maybe after getting a little message he will shut the heck up and quit making us all look like cheerleading, dog fighting, juice taking, mojo stealing, car washing, idol worshipping, vegan eating, mispelling, golf addicted sycophants.Cfinn: you think it will work?jayboogie: Yea of course it will work, I'd bet $100 it will work.Cfinn: Why are you putting lipstick on jay?jayboogie: I don't know. but I feel pretty.Cfinn: Matches Daniel's skirt nicely.Waffles: Yea now we just need to make sure that nobody feels sorry for them forfeiting when their player was mugged, and they might drop out of next season so we can do without them.DN: Wouldn't hurt us alot to have an easier time in the division matches. Rhinestone almost beat me, and Sloshr whopped my skinny butt. The last thing we need is the poker prowess of Yoda, No_Neck and Balloon guy to contend with also.Cfinn: Is that why you are trying to make so many changes in the league?DN: Yup, we need to change this up. Something is really wrong when I don't dominate an entire conference of internet losers. I mean come on, I have what, the 13th best personal record? Me?Waffles: Well if it helps, you are the best player on this team.DN: You think? Mushu could beat you guys.jayboogie: Dude, I had a good season. If you had let me play more we would probably had a much bigger lead at the end.Cfinn: Boys, zip up the pants. What matters is that we got the division title. Now let's work on ways to improve our game.DN: Improve my game? The only game that needs improving is my golf game. I still am probably one of the top ten people readers this game has ever had. And my overall game in every form of poker is solid. What we need to do is mess up the league so that the other players get confused.That's why I am going to institute a sweeping change to the league, with multi level matches, chip dumping, Saturday morning games, blind draws, and forced player rotations. I of course will 'randomly' get to play when my schedule allows, whether by computer picks, or teammate sudden 'family trips'.Cfinn: So the team stays the same though?DN: Yes Cfinnn, you will get a free ride again. Enjoy the money you three. I earned it.***End Transmission***

[mrdannyg 274]

Cfinn: Why are you putting lipstick on jay?jayboogie: I don't know. but I feel pretty.

another classic for the archives

[cfinnn 0]

LOL! I can't believe I almost missed this one.Funny how these little chats are never quite how I remember them. Hmm.

[GWCGWC 83]

Cfinn: That's why he forfieted? Because you mugged him?Waffles: No I didn't mug him. I just bet some guys $500 that they wouldn't mug him. And I lost the bet.

pure hilarityexcellent post