Tijuana Daze

[David_Sklansky 1,903]

So I recently attempted to acquire a screenplay, but dealing with writers is always hilarious and a compromise was not possible on his/her end. This got me thinking, though, this forum has never really seen a poster who had my creativity or command of the language, and has seen few with my mind for the game. So why not write my own poker screen play, given that they are worth $75K and don't have to be much more than 100 pages?

 

Let me introduce my project: Tijuana Daze.

 

Kevin is a LV-based mid-stakes NLHE pro with all the right moves. After skipping a college education for the allure of easy money, Kevin has convinced himself that he is basically a wholesome business man who is just too smart to work, and that he can avoid the pitfalls of gambling. Extrapolating his best two-month run to determine his official income and ignoring the need for proper savings or ****ing health insurance, Kevin starts a family and talks shit about the rest of the world's sucker population. Until Black Friday [sound of needle carelessly removed from record].

 

Suddenly Kevin finds himself penniless and unemployable, with three people counting on him for -- you know -- food and shelter. Hi-jinx ensue as Kevin's addiction and social deterioration find him in Tijuana, losing the stake his brother in law lent him in online cash games, as his wife and kids have to do unthinkable things back home just to eat and avoid being evicted from the extended stay hotel they live in.

 

It's kind of like Rounders meets Basketball Diaries, and there is a huge built-in audience because this describes what happened to like 40% of poker pros a couple years ago.

 

I am thinking about Leo or Toby McGuire to play Kevin. Given that Spiderman 2 did like $800mil at the box office, and Titanic did like $600mil, I feel like this is a slamdunk.

[BigDMcGee 3,352]

I have Northwestern Classmate who's worked as an EP for Todd Solondz on several of his independent projects. I think Solondz would be perfect for this. If you could clean this up a bit, and write a couple page story pitch, I'd be happy to pass it onto her.

[David_Sklansky 1,903]

I have Northwestern Classmate who's worked as an EP for Todd Solondz on several of his independent projects. I think Solondz would be perfect for this. If you could clean this up a bit, and write a couple page story pitch, I'd be happy to pass it onto her.

 

Yeah, that would be ****ing nuts! I don't want to make promises this early because I have no clue how much control I would end up having, but if you could get us in touch, I will do what I can to get you a production credit or something.

[SuitedAces21 2,722]

who are you thinking for the wife?

[David_Sklansky 1,903]

who are you thinking for the wife?

 

The Wendy's Girl.

[SuitedAces21 2,722]

oh i'd pay to see her do certain things to feed her children.

[David_Sklansky 1,903]

oh i'd pay to see her do certain things to feed her children.

 

Trust me. Women only exist to lose their dignity in a David Sklansky joint.

 

Also, this opens up the door for all kinds of Wendy's tie-ins and product placement.

[king_tanner 84]

Tijuana Daze is a name for a porn star not a movie.

[David_Sklansky 1,903]

If what you are implying is that this exciting project has given you a touchless orgasm, I would just point out that you aren't the first and won't be the last.

[Hidden Dragon 7]

You mother ******. For anyone who doesn't know, David_Sklansky is an impostor. While he may be a top young high stakes poker player, he is not the real Sklansky, nor is he the writer of exciting new film project Tijuana Daze. That honor belongs to me and poster Dirty Dutch. Please stop stealing my intellectual property.

 

That said, it sounds like with your money, connections and keen eye for structure, this could turn into a really profitable and entertaining picture. Would you mind telling us if this is going to be a fun popcorn movie, or if you are planning to give voice to the darker material and maybe turn this into Oscar bait?

[David_Sklansky 1,903]

Hey Dragon,

 

That is a very astute question; congratulations on asking it. The answer is even better: both. I think the closest thing in tone to this project would be something like Slumdog Millionaire, which explored darker themes, but in the end was uplifting to the kinds of people dumb enough to go see a poker movie. In fact, without giving anything away, I may or may not be in talks with Danny Boyle to direct, but am advised to confirm nor deny until I get some more investments and take a meeting with McGee's friend.

 

I hope that answers your question, and you and only you are welcome to ask any others that pop into your head as production moves forward.

[SuitedAces21 2,722]

what the hell do you mean this isn't the real david sklansky? why did i send you those pictures of my feet and more importantly who the hell are you really?

[David_Sklansky 1,903]

Ignore him. He is just trying to cause trouble and sell tickets to my movie.