A Fun Day on the Golf Course

I’ve been getting up way too late everyday and that’s not good when you are trying to play tournaments at noon. Today for example, I ended up waking up at around 3:00pm. I just bought this neat new coffee table that has five interchangeable game boards in it: Chess, Checkers, Backgammon, Monopoly, and Scrabble. I was supposed to play a challenge match at the Wynn against Eli Elezra but he had some things to do with his kids so I settled for the next best thing: a chess match against Travis. I pretty much suck at Chess and didn’t think I could win especially since Travis said he was pretty good. Ok, so he was wrong! After the shellacking I hopped onto the computer for a little bit and then I got a call from Mr.Hellmuth. Phil is in town to play the heads up tournament tomorrow and called me from Carlos’ phone, “Hey Danny Boy, let’s go play some golf man!” He’s one of the few guys that can call me Danny Boy and get away with it.. It was already late though and I hadn’t golfed in ages. However considering how stressed out I’ve been with an overload of work and travel I thought it might be good to get outside for a while. They were just leaving the Mirage and since I live close to Angel Park I got there first. The Par 3 course was having league night so we’d have to play the Palms course and hope to get six holes in. Carlos, Phil, and Huck all arrived together and we were trying to figure out a fair match to play. Huck is an absolute monster on the golf course. He whined and complained that he sucks, and he is the worst, blah, blah, blah. Hasn’t played in over a year… blah, blah, blah. Huck could never pick up a club for 10 years and he’d still be the favorite in this crew. First you have Carlos who’s played maybe three times in his life, me who never has time and isn’t very good, and then you have Phil who’d be playing in his bare feet! Seriously, Phil was wearing his trademark loafers which were too slippery so he decided to play the course in his bare feet. Finally we decided that since Huck had to be the best and Carlos had to be the worst that they’d partner up against Phil and I. The plan was to play a scramble so in a way it was more like Phil and I against Huck with the occasional helper from Juan Carlos. Nobody could figure out how much we should play for so I came up with a brilliant idea. Each hole we’d play for 1% of each other in the upcoming WPT event at the Mirage. So if we won four holes and lost two we’d get 2% of Carlos and Huck’s winnings in the tournament if they happened to cash. “Nah man, no way. We have no shot. We should get a spot or something.” Huck complained. “What are you talking about? You are getting a spot.” Phil said. “I mean really, you are getting 1% of us for 1% of you guys.” I thought that was hilarious and I actually said it to Phil jokingly before he playfully needled Carlos and Huck. Finally we agreed and then headed to the first tee box. The first hole was pretty embarrassing, especially since we were scrambling. Phil hit a great drive leaving us 120 yards from the pin, while Huck lost his ball and had to use Carlos’ pitiful drive. I shank my approach and so does Phil! Huck hits a beauty and they ended up making bogie. Both Phil and I had a bogie putt that must have been about four feet… and we both missed it! On hole number two we evened things up and then on three we lost the lead again. We tied it up on hole number four and suddenly we felt the tide really turning in our favor. We take number five and have our first lead of the match. Then on hole number six, which was a 125 yard par 3 over the water I hit a line drive that was destined for water, but just made it over and about five feet from the cup. Of course we once again missed our birdie putt and had to settle for a split on the hole. On number seven we got into some trouble on our second shot on the par five. I duffed mine about 20 feet right into the bunker, and Phil hit his into the rocks. It didn’t look like we could possibly lose the hole since both Carlos and Huck hit their drives out of play. Huck was ready to give up until he noticed that we’d have to hit from a horrible lie in the rocks with a long way to go to the green. I get in the rocks and hit one safely into play. Then Phil the madman goes for the green in his bare feet on sharp rocks. He absolutely drills it thirty feet PAST the green! Amazing shot and well worth the cuts he suffered. We took seven and were up 2% a piece, “Play good guys. Make sure you get plenty of rest before the tournament.” I figured this was a good time to start needling them since we would be playing only one more hole. We gave them a chance to double the bet if they wanted, but Huck didn’t like their chances and declined. We both made it on the green in two and both had virtually the same 25 foot putt. Both Phil and I hit good putts but would have to settle for a two-putt. Then Carlos hits an ugly one about five feet short and we were feeling like we had some hope if Huck didn’t get close. As Carlos went to mark his ball, Huck said, “Don’t worry about it man, we aren’t going to be using that one.” Oooh cocky, I like that! Then out of nowhere, Huck drains a snake like putt to salvage 1%. It was too dark to go on so we ended up playing just eight holes which was actually more than I suspected we’d get in. I yapped on the phone for a little while when I got home, and then headed over to my Golden Tee looking to break some records. In between I played some NBA Showtime and some NFL Blitz. I ended up playing for hours and regained some Golden Tee records that Travis had previously stolen from me. 16 under on Oak Hollow… take that! I also spent some time watching the all-in fest, Super Stars Invitational on FSN. Yikes, were those freeze outs ever crap shoots! Now it’s 3:30 am and it’s decision time for me. I’ve been having so much trouble getting on the right sleep schedule that I’m debating staying up all night so that I can make the 10:00am start for the $15,000 buy in heads up tournament this morning. The plan would then be to stay up all day and try to get to bed at around 8:00am the next day. All these red eye flights really take a toll on the sleep schedule. On the morning of the 15th I’m taking another 6:30am flight so that I can make it to Ohio State in the afternoon for their Hold’em tournament that I’m speaking at. I’m leaning heavily towards staying up all night, which means Travis’ record 11 under at Ridgewood is in serious jeopardy. ]]>