Speedziphone

So...

Pretty sure I could manage. Although, dump in enough hot sauce and it could be promising.

I was pleasantly surprised by how good that was. Hello.

I think that's what girls say when they're being flirty and like that you're sort of stalking them. I think.

Tomato potato.

Oh wait, he t-boned the guy in front of him. Bet that doesn't happen too often.

So move. Oh beans. I hope you didn't hurt anyone, if only because I feel like there's someone around here who hates drunk driving and will have an "I told you so" waiting. Although maybe it was LG, in which case you're off the hook. How did you t-bone someone coming around a corner? Do you mean that you came around the corner and crossed over another street?

I don't really understand what's happening tonight. Is he breaking up with her, although I guess they're not even dating, or is he officially asking her out, although maybe they sort of are already dating.

Napa, learn to have fun around your parents. It makes life easier. Close enough. I'm nodding in approval.

Start sending her 8am emails every single Friday reminding her that you'll be sending the invoices over by 2. I don't do human medical stories.

True, but there's probably a better chance of saving the mood when going before. And zero chance of an unfortunate accident. I went to school with him. He was always breakdancing in the hallways.

I've had to interrupt for that reason. I think the only worse mood killer would be actually shitting in the bed. Heh. To both.

Really?

Let's say a woman is very...excited, to have sex. With you, immediately. But you have the runs, and you feel a bout a'coming. If you have sex, it could explode, but if you pause for a poo break it will almost definitely ruin her very optimal mood.Using percentage chance of shitting yourself mid-coitus, how much of a chance would you take to immediately engage in the sexo? I think that more than 15% is pushing it.

I have 2.5 weeks of beard growth. It looks glorious, if I may say so myself.

Thanks. Pretty sure if they didn't buy me the mac I would've been really pissed for not realizing the deal you found was a short term thing. I'm walking the dog and there's a group of about eight teenagers who just went to Dairy Queen walking behind me, listening to me dictate this into my phone. Meh, whatever Once again, having trouble reading sarcasm. Shake is definitely higher than top 20% in all categories… The average person is unbelievably ugly and unfunny.

Haha, I got confused and thought tilt was talking about shake when saying he's banged a ton of good looking chicks.

I feel as I have disappointed you on multiple levels.

Heh. Well, I was going to get the strat-recommended computer, but my parents have convinced me to let them buy me a Mac. I'm pretty disappointed in myself.

Progress!

I had my testosterone level once, about a year after I broke up with the ex-girlfriend. Turns out that my levels were totally normal and my lack of sex drive was due to laziness and possibly a generalized distaste for dealing with women-related issues at the time. And my inability to gain any good muscle through working out was apparently due to my many genetic curses.Did I ever tell the story about getting the prescription for the testosterone blood test and taking it to the place where they actually draw and submit the blood, where I had to hand a slip that said "decreased sex drive" to a

Sheesh, baby. Get it together. You don't mean to insult him, it's just that you'd be better at life than him with his body, because even though your personality is bad, his is worse?

This sounds like a Skip Bayless argument. Is this even in question?I liked the bj story better the way I told it the first time, and it was probably more accurate too, as it was closer to when it actually happened and I wasn't dealing with iPhone dictation. Oh well, it had the same basic story and moral.

Maybe. But not everyone else is going downhill in their late 30's and then drastically improving at 39. If anything, I'd be inclined to believe he was the rare player to have never done PEDs before, but finally decided to give something a shot (likely HGH). But of course it's all speculation, I just think it's funny people want to defend him because they think he's such a great guy. To me he's always seemed like a great ball player and good guy who mostly keeps his head down and bangs hot younger chick...ok, I guess that's pretty great. But few people really know if he'd entertain the ide

Shower AND sex before work? I don't even understand how this is possibly unless you both don't have to leave for work until 8:30 or so. Even that would be pushing it. I can buy this.I like when people defend Jeter. I feel like your response is the only reasonable one.