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cardcore

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Posts posted by cardcore

    What Have You Done That 99% Of Fcpers Have Not?

    in General Poker Forum

    Posted

    - had an opportunity to eat dinner with jay fielder (met him before this and got autographs)
    Jay Fiedler coached me for 3 days when I was a quarterback in 7th/8th grade, he's from my hometown
    - could honestly eat chinese food everyday- because of ^^^^ i have probably taken more shits then anyone on fcp combined
    i will give you a run for your money here as well :club:

    What Have You Done That 99% Of Fcpers Have Not?

    in General Poker Forum

    Posted

    all of my fun things are poker related, i've more or less met every poker 'celebrity' but here is my list of things that stick out in my mind:- "made it rain" at a strip club with layne flack- chest bumped mike tyson- witnessed jc alvarado pick up a group of 6 girls- witnessed looshle get wasted- had a $6,000 dinner at okada with jamie gold, which was immediately followed up by an $11k bar tab, all comped at the wynn (this night was very lol)- ate at Masa in NYC where I tried fugu, the poisonous fish- had dinner with montel williams- had lunch with ron ratner (he owns some sports team, I think the nets? i forget)- briefly dated Kenneth Cole's niece- met british royaltyi'm sure there's more but im going to make a sandwich

    What Have You Done That 99% Of Fcpers Have Not?

    in General Poker Forum

    Posted

    Been featured on SportscenterWon a sports world championshipReceived a phone call at work from a US President.Escorted John McEnroe & Ivan Lendl to their stadium match at the US OpenHad dinner with AJ Hackett, "founder" of bungee jumpingWent to a movie with Jodie FosterSat next to a US Senator on a flight, coincidentally reading a book in which said Senator's reputation was critiquedFinished the NY Marathon.Saw Tom Tom Club at CBGBAttended the world dj championship at the old Ritz in NY.
    what? who are you?

    Beat It Like A Cop

    in General

    Posted

    i was at the girl's family's house for the holidays. Her father and I are in the basement watching the massive TV, and he falls asleep. After like 20 minutes I forget that he's there and rip the loudest fart (on leather, amplified) and he wakes up with a start. I look at him and start laughing my ass off, he looks at me and says, "did you just fart me awake?""DID YOU JUST FART ME AWAKE"I could NOT STOP LAUGHING

    It's New Years Eve

    in General Poker Forum

    Posted

    Full contact poker,Our internet home.It's new years eve,I'll write you a poem.We've got some great membersWho grace our presence dailySome grace it with humor,While some grace it gayly.One case in pointIs our own troyomac.He likes slipping the dongThrough the hole in the back.Then there's our little KevlarWith his great drunken threadsWe're all holding out hopeWe never read that he's dead.Vtlaxer and gibler,Great tournament pros,Their results are quite stellar,They're good and it shows.If there was a thread to be madeAbout playing Mexican Poker, JC AlvaradoWould probably be it's invoker.Looshball and Steve,I wrote about them already,They ended up holding hands,And now they're going steady.This thread would not be completeWithout insulting Teddy's mom.She's got a mouth like a hoover,I always leave your house calm.I'd probably make this longerIf I wasn't going out drinkingMaybe I'll come back later and editIf it doesn't require much thinking.So, Happy New Year, I say!To grand ol' FCP.May 2009Be great for both you and me.

    Looshle Vs Steve7stud

    in General Poker Forum

    Posted

    Yes.It's not being efficient if you wasted more time asking people where to find the thread, than finding it yourself. That is in fact ineffecient. And since you cared enough to ask where the thread was, then obviously it was somewhat important to you.
    i smell a troyomac and jeepster poem

    Looshle Vs Steve7stud

    in General Poker Forum

    Posted

    One night in DecemberFCP was abuzzThere was internet drama,I didn't know what it was.I got an IM"Hey Seth, did you see?There's a big thread in GenpoAnd it's looshle vs Steve."I barely know Steve,But Steve knows Ted Forrest,I know this becauseHe made a thread that said he knew Ted Forrest.Then there's our ol' looshball,And he's cute when he's mad.He went off on SteveHe thinks Steve's threads are bad.I guess Steve asked"What's up with FCP?Some guys are playing high limitsTheir success due to me."Well, loosh took exception"Shenanigans!" He said."You're a shill for your program!Your threads should be dead!"The challenge was issuedIt was HU4ROLLZThe venue was CommerceTo see who could read soulsBoth players approachedThe high limit sectionThey were both too excitedAnd couldn't hide their erections.Loosh had his red hatAnd a sh1t eating grinSteve looked at loosh"There's no way you'll win."They sat across from each otherSwords wrestling belowFCP broke out the popcornTo watch them put on a show.Loosh decided to slowrollEvery chance that he couldSteve's increasing frustrationShrunk the size of his wood.Now by virtue of long dongLoosh might have been winner,But the one problem wasHis dong was much thinner.So the match went on longer,Steve climbed back to evenThey battled for hours,Neither planning on leaving.About 8 hours laterThe floor man arrived at the table"Pack it up, guys,You're both highly unstable."Steve looked at looshand loosh looked at SteveThey both broke out laughingNow that they had a reprieve."Want to get tacos?"Steve queried to looshball"Sure thing, I love tacos,"They went down the hall.They looked at each otherand in tandem both said"This e-fight is stupid,That thread should be dead."So the thread was closed,and all back to ship shape.With both Steve and looshAvoiding HU4ROLLZ rape.

    A Poker Poem For Christmas

    in General Poker Forum

    Posted

    Twas the night before Christmas,I yelled for a spade.A brick hit the river,My hand was not made.I cursed and I cried.Hey Santa, F you!I guess that's how it goesOn Christmas for Jews.I went to the movies,Chinese food consumed,Tonight I was grinding,A win was assumed.My tables were loadedWith wealthy drunk fishTonight they'd pad my account,That was my Christmas wish.I check-raised and 3betWithout care or avail,I stacked all the fishiesTo the delight of the rail.All the regs started bitchingHey! Leave some for us!I laughed in their facesAnd kept riding my rush.Seven deuce was a raise,And then a 4-bet all in,No matter what happenedI just seemed to win.I was feeling lucky,Time to take a shot.I was salivatingFor a Railheaven pot.I bought in for the min,I could afford to lose twice,I'd steal the blinds a few times,A quick 5k would be nice.But Santa, Oh SantaYou had plans for this JewWhen I tried to three-betI got called by seat 2.I was out of positionWith a marginal handIf he floated my c-bet,I'd lose 15 grand.The flop was all ragged,I threw out 7k,I got raised in 5 seconds,I guess I'd shove and pray.So I stuck it inWith my naked Jack TenThe board was three-four-eightAnd I was basically screwed if anyone called that bet because I only had jack high, what the hell?I got snapped off quickly,My hand did not win.50k down the drain,Glass. Tonic. Gin.Well, I'd had visions of reindeer,Santa on his sleigh,But the only gift he'd deliverWas his balls on my face.Merry Christmas.

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