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Member Since 29 Aug 2006
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#1232349 I Called In Sick Today

Posted Ouch-8s on 18 July 2006 - 09:33 AM

View Postspeedz99, on Tuesday, July 18th, 2006, 8:17 AM, said:

I got an hj at a Dave Matthews concert.It was horribly awkward. I broke up with that girl the next day when I met another girl I liked better (my g/f of the past 5 years).
Dave Matthews concert, a few years ago. I'm driving my GF into the city to see the concert. For some reason, her sister is taking the bus back to the city; I don't remember why I didn't drive her too.We get about halfway there, I stop for gas, fill up, and pull back out on the highway. As I am accelerating up to highway speeds, I shift into 2nd, and the clutch falls to the floor. I limp up the road to a pullout and pop the hood. Clutch cable is broken.So I call BCAA, tell them where the car is and ask them to call me and tell me where they had it towed to for repairs. We start hitchhiking to try and get to the concert on time.Eventually the bus comes along, and somehow the Queen's sister sees us on the side of the road and tells the driver to stop. They don't accept cash on this bus, you need to pre-purchase tickets. He lets us on anyways and takes us into the city for free. I am impressed, but very late.We get to the concert, and there are two couples in the seats directly in front of us. College aged, frat-boy looking jocks and their bimbo girlfriends. They are very loud and exuberant. It comes out that it's one of the frat-boys' birthday and they are there as his present. It comes out that they are all on copious amounts of ecstacy. So much that random other people are coming up to them and asking for some, and they assume a 'one for you, one for me' policy. It comes out that the ecstasy is making them all pretty lovey-dovey, and they're doing the big group hug and sway to the music thing. The group hug leads to some touchy-feely groping in the group; one of the guys has his hand up a girl's shirt. One of the girls is grabbing a frat-boy's ass. There is some grinding. My GF and I are watching them with amusement; they are infinately more entertaining than a VERY drunk Dave Matthews.One of the girls gets tired. She sits down. No one notices. The grinding continues. Before long, the two guys are grinding and groping each other, 'without realizing'. Then birthday boy clues in and jumps back. The three of them look a little uncomfortable at how much they were enjoying themselves, until the other guy manages to talk birthday boy back into the melee. There is lots of "I don't know" "I'm not gay" "What is happening?" but eventually the girls talk the two guys into kissing. They are reluctant at first but once they start there is NO stopping them.Birthday boy, boyfriend and girlfriend are all bumping and grinding. Birthday girlfriend is sitting out. Soon girlfriend is too, and it's just the guys, and they are putting on quite a show. Birthday boy is oblivious to the world around him, which isn't a big deal since no-one cares about his newfound appreciation for the male form. Except his girlfriend. She starts to get upset, at first just a mild annoyance, then gradually more, and then when she is unsuccesfull at getting his attention away from his friend, she breaks down and has a full on drug induced anxiety attack. She's alternating between sobbing and screaming, wringing her eyes and flailing away at her boyfriend's back. He finally realizes that he has upset his girlfriend. The boys break their embrace and take a literal and a figurative step back from each other. Lots of quick self-realization occurs and the group slinks out of the concert. I would have enjoyed seeing them in a few hours once their ecstacy haze wears off; I'm sure there was a lot of soul searching required. Loser frat boys. Hehe.So which of you e-gays was that anyways?

View PostRandy Reed, on Tuesday, July 18th, 2006, 8:53 AM, said:

My last day he reached in his pocket and gave me a half eaten Mars bar as a gesture of kindness.
Did you immediately punch him in the throat for daring to eat half of your Mars bar?

#3700182 Essay's Top Ten

Posted RodReynolds on 03 May 2015 - 05:03 PM

View PostSuitedAces21, on 03 May 2015 - 04:52 PM, said:

50 more warnings for Rod for not being able to figure out what was on the zontal AND trying to sneak a dig in.

I originally liked Napa's post with the graph, but I'm now seriously considering withdrawing it. The graph is very non-standard and it honestly is making me quite upset (time plays no part in the graph despite the title of the graph claiming otherwise, and the horizontal and vertical contain the SAME INFORMATION but in slightly different forms), and now you're piling on with 50 more warnings and the only silver lining here is that my average warnings per offense has dropped from 500 to 275, so that's something, but now I'm this close to withdrawing all the likes I've given you in this thread. That was an empty threat, so please don't penalize me too harshly.

#3697997 I Called In Sick Today

Posted Ron_Mexico on 14 April 2015 - 04:26 PM

Essay, I got your hug in. Happily.

That damn brvy and his gigantic bladder outsmarted me. He got the check while I went and pee'd. I'm none too pleased. I really wanted to pay. Brvy had 3 LIT's and 2 Caucasians. I respected that order. We broke bread. Never at a loss for conversation. He really is too nice for words. Until I mentioned tilty. Kidding.

I suggest meeting Brvy if he's in your area. He was kind enough to drive to me, 45 minutes away. Truly a saint and I'm glad he did.

Fcker stole my check.

And got Bruno a damn gift. And what did I get him? NOTHING. Arghhhhh. He bested me. And no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't make him uncomfortable.

Until he asked if he tipped enough. I said it didn't matter, our waitress was black. He said I was no better than suited.

#3388274 Gay Marriage

Posted SuitedAces21 on 01 September 2010 - 01:36 PM

View PostJeepster80125, on Wednesday, September 1st, 2010, 4:25 PM, said:

I don't know the guy. I don't know if he's wrong or not, and I'm not even sure if 'pwned' is even the right word to use there. I think I would have to actually know whether or not custom was wrong before I declare him to be 'pwned'.You probably understood this.
Objection. Please don't speculate on Mr. Shabadoo's mental state. Now then, will you clarify your statement as to your knowledge of the meaning and proper use of the phrase in question. We have evidence that not only are you aware of said phrase's meaning but that you have, in fact, and without regard to context, used said phrase on numerous occassions.

#3571081 I Called In Sick Today

Posted loogie on 12 November 2012 - 07:00 PM

View PostInternetExplorer, on 12 November 2012 - 06:14 PM, said:

I used to do push-ups and sit-ups at the outset of this thing. just kind of quit over time. it feels pretty great to randomly do push-ups so I do it from time to time. not sure what a reasonable sesh would be.


I posted this for you before, but you ignored it like a real piece of work.

#3569951 I Called In Sick Today

Posted SuitedAces21 on 31 October 2012 - 01:29 PM

oh hey there buddy. missed you lots. one love.

Posted Image

#3569657 I Called In Sick Today

Posted ShakeZuma on 26 October 2012 - 08:43 PM

nah haven't banged this one yet. this one's new as of last weekend. I mean she's in the same group of friends as the married bitch that I was banging before, but I hadn't met her until last weekend. shit's cray ynahmean.

I think I've decided the best response is no respnonse. especially considering I just spelled response like that. but seriously. I can't come up with anythin decent so I'm just going to go to bed. and I'm having trouble typing out basic english to just you guys so I'm pretty sure I'm making the right decisiont

give me some pointers for a response tomrrow though. you niggers know I can't do it on my own.

edit haha I said niggers thats not appropriate

edit 2 seriouysly shake that's not cool

#3533949 I Called In Sick Today

Posted DJ Vu on 25 January 2012 - 10:48 AM

View PostRon_Mexico, on Wednesday, January 25th, 2012, 10:43 AM, said:

I do love women. All types. Give me a ginger with some glasses and she could be missing a leg and it wouldn't matter. Variety is king, I don't care what these monogamy fools tell you. Would you rather spend all of your 30's with one cool, hot (8) girl or a seemingly endless supply of 5's? I take the 5's. Debate.
Yeah, women are nice. What happens at 40? Do I have to start over or is there a chance the 8 sticks around?

#3533945 I Called In Sick Today

Posted DJ Vu on 25 January 2012 - 10:46 AM

View PostQuacktastic, on Wednesday, January 25th, 2012, 10:39 AM, said:

Our new thing in here should be not talking about politics.
I didn't really want this to be about politics.But I think it's interesting that some people think athletes should use their platform for something other than selling shoes, but when they do speak out (and it's against our personal ideals) the response is "shut up, you play a GAME."We applaud Muhammed Ali for taking a stand (well, we do now anyway), but we make fun of someone like Tim Robbins. Ok, maybe that's not the best comparison, but you see what I'm getting at. We have no consistency with this. We want celebrities to speak up only if we agree with what they're saying.

#3533872 I Called In Sick Today

Posted DJ Vu on 25 January 2012 - 08:59 AM

Have you guys heard of this "controversy" about Bruins goalie Tim Thomas not going to the White House?Every team after winning a championship gets to go to the White House and meet the President. Thomas is a Tea Party guy and has no interest in meeting this President. Do you think this is an acceptable protest or should he respect the office and go regardless of political beliefs?

#3533839 I Called In Sick Today

Posted DJ Vu on 25 January 2012 - 08:10 AM

View PostShakeZuma, on Wednesday, January 25th, 2012, 2:34 AM, said:

man, fucking apartments are expensive. I spent some time yesterday looking at apartment prices and figuring out what it would cost to furnish one and what my monthly payments would look like, and it looks like I might be able to afford one in 10 years.
Don't you own a house?

#3533720 I Called In Sick Today

Posted DJ Vu on 24 January 2012 - 05:19 PM

View Poststrategy, on Tuesday, January 24th, 2012, 5:16 PM, said:

I'm friendly with the owner who is for some reason concerned about me wasting my life as a teller. said she'd seen it in the paper over the weekend.
First thought: Why is the paper reporting on your life?

#3533699 I Called In Sick Today

Posted DJ Vu on 24 January 2012 - 04:52 PM

View Postspeedz99, on Tuesday, January 24th, 2012, 4:49 PM, said:

I prefer 'stratso'.
Ooh, me too.Edit: Timing, I gots it.

#3533685 I Called In Sick Today

Posted DJ Vu on 24 January 2012 - 04:29 PM

View Poststrategy, on Tuesday, January 24th, 2012, 4:15 PM, said:

sorry, I know no one really cares, but it seems like it might be useful to have thought about this before going into a salary negotiation for pretty much anyone.
I would totally care if I knew what you were talking about.Does this have to do with corgis? 'Cause corgis are ridiculous, people. Important comma.

#3533676 I Called In Sick Today

Posted DJ Vu on 24 January 2012 - 04:08 PM

Huzzah!I don't know why we lie about money. Evolution probably.Oh, that reminds me...hey speedz, the corgi, somebody messed up there, right?Posted ImageCome on!Edit:Posted ImageAww.