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I Called In Sick Today


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#264301 Essay21

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Posted 20 July 2018 - 06:37 PM

I mean it sounds like she needs someone to talk to. A nice understanding gentleman to show her some kindness. Meeting for a drink wouldnít hurt anyone.

#264302 InternetExplorer

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Posted 20 July 2018 - 07:05 PM

Perfect! Glad you agree. Setting it up now.
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#264303 Essay21

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Posted 20 July 2018 - 07:08 PM

Iím just not sure that so easily dismissing this is the correct path. Maybe something a little reckless is just what we need.

#264304 Theraflu

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Posted 20 July 2018 - 07:34 PM

It is the easiest and most cowardly way to end the current relationship.

That's a crazy out of the blue text.
I'd lend a hand, but it's stuck in the fist and gun position.

#264305 SuitedAces21

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Posted 20 July 2018 - 07:36 PM

and the most fun way to end the relationship. glad thera is on board.

View PostRon_Mexico, on 23 April 2014 - 04:48 PM, said:

Now that i've had a few drinks, I'm ready to admilt that the reason I dont post more is suited.

I hate every fiber of his being. He's awful and everything he writes is wrong, coupled with being annoying. Its uncanny how awful he is. If he was around when this thread was thriving, he would have killed it. Thankfully, he wasnt.

Maybe in the real world, he's not so awful (evidence says otherwise) but here, he makes me want to fight. Nobody makes me want to fight. Its beyond weird. I almost feel bad, but I dont

#264306 Theraflu

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Posted 20 July 2018 - 07:42 PM

I did pretty much the same thing (minus a divorce) in freshman year of college with a relationship that was clearly over. It was obvious and pathetic, but it got the job done.
I'd lend a hand, but it's stuck in the fist and gun position.

#264307 Napa_Don

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Posted 20 July 2018 - 07:44 PM

Ive always said the only thing better than an office relationship is breaking up an office relationship by sleeping with another coworker.

#264308 Theraflu

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Posted 20 July 2018 - 07:45 PM

I think that's in the revised edition of the bible.
I'd lend a hand, but it's stuck in the fist and gun position.

#264309 InternetExplorer

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Posted 20 July 2018 - 08:15 PM

She told me 6+ months ago that her husband was jealous. We went to Vegas for a conference... me, her, and her boss, a month or two ago, which almost certainly aggravated things. It just isnít a match on personality. Even if I was single, I donít think Iíd do it. Sheís just trying to piss him off.
QUOTE (Spademan @ Thursday, April 5th, 2012, 2:03 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
The only way to speak "loudly" on the internet is to TYPE IN CAPS. AND I RARELY TYPE IN CAPS.


#264310 InternetExplorer

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Posted 20 July 2018 - 08:21 PM

Anyway, I told her I was sorry to hear it but that I had confidence she would kill it as a free agent. She said ďIíd give you a bro hug right now if I could.Ē Itís gonna be awkward when she sobers up and we have to collaborate on numbers again next month.
QUOTE (Spademan @ Thursday, April 5th, 2012, 2:03 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
The only way to speak "loudly" on the internet is to TYPE IN CAPS. AND I RARELY TYPE IN CAPS.


#264311 Theraflu

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Posted 20 July 2018 - 08:40 PM

That's the worst pick-up line I've ever heard.
I'd lend a hand, but it's stuck in the fist and gun position.

#264312 Essay21

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Posted 20 July 2018 - 08:49 PM

She only said that because he didnít respond with a dick pic.

#264313 CobaltBlue

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Posted 21 July 2018 - 11:52 AM

I outsource my yardwork and pool maintenance, because I don't want other chores filling my week. However, I painted a room a year or two ago, because I felt I could do a good job, get some experience, save some money, and just generally feel good about accomplishing a project.

#264314 SuitedAces21

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Posted 21 July 2018 - 12:28 PM

when i own a home i look forward to attempting to fix things myself, screwing it up, then paying someone to fix it correctly.

View PostRon_Mexico, on 23 April 2014 - 04:48 PM, said:

Now that i've had a few drinks, I'm ready to admilt that the reason I dont post more is suited.

I hate every fiber of his being. He's awful and everything he writes is wrong, coupled with being annoying. Its uncanny how awful he is. If he was around when this thread was thriving, he would have killed it. Thankfully, he wasnt.

Maybe in the real world, he's not so awful (evidence says otherwise) but here, he makes me want to fight. Nobody makes me want to fight. Its beyond weird. I almost feel bad, but I dont

#264315 Theraflu

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Posted 21 July 2018 - 06:43 PM

I'm on vacation. Driving the family down to Baltimore for a few nights, catch a Sox game or two, enjoy the inner harbor amidst periodic thunderstorms.
I'd lend a hand, but it's stuck in the fist and gun position.

#264316 David_Sklansky

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Posted 22 July 2018 - 09:56 AM

View PostSuitedAces21, on 21 July 2018 - 12:28 PM, said:

when i own a home i look forward to attempting to fix things myself, screwing it up, then paying someone to fix it correctly.

Pretending your time isn't more valuable than people who work with their hands is a rite of passage for the American male of means (AMoM). I bought a lift in order to start pretending to work on a project car. It took me months to get around to defogging the headlamps, and I eventually just paid someone to do it instead. Now I'm looking at cartoon pornography of women who have a bunch of legs like spiders.
12. When menstruating, use a product that right for your menstrual flow. A tampon too big can irritate and develop fungus. A product left in too long can cause bacteria or fungus build up. Products can be changed at least every 4 hours. Except when sleeping, they can be left in for the night

#264317 Napa_Don

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Posted 22 July 2018 - 11:28 AM

Yes. This is the content I crave.


Went to a friends house warming party last night. Just gonna let you know now I didnít close so as to not to lead you on.

I had never really met his girlfriends friends before and so when I saw this America Ferrara looking girl (think Superstore, not ugly Betty) I didnít think much of it because there was some dude around her most of the time. So I did what I normally do and thatís drink as much as I wanted while having fun. At some point it was late and we were drinking and listening to music in the garage and i went over to the jungle juice jug to get some and sheís like oh hey put some ice in there and I made a comment about how mad I was Iíd been drinking ice-less juice all night like some goddamn peasant and she thought it was funny and then from then on she fully started ignoring that other dude, who apparently was some neighbor, to the point where he gave up and left and started hanging out with me and then she kept finding reasons to touch me and folks...I think she was into The Kid.

But because Iím me I didnít even get her actual name, she just kept calling me Iowa and I was calling her Wisconsin, much less her number. I did invite her to my eventual house warming party but only if she brings some Spotted Cow from wisconsin, though.

#264318 BigDMcGee

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Posted 22 July 2018 - 12:41 PM

for the love of christ, get her number from your friend's girlfriend and ask her out.
"We are only wise in knowing that we know nothing"
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#264319 CobaltBlue

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Posted 22 July 2018 - 05:03 PM

Nothing revs a lady's engines like throwing the word 'peasant' into the conversation. :icon_wink:

#264320 SuitedAces21

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Posted 22 July 2018 - 06:08 PM

yeah you need to ask about her and shoot her a text. even i know that.

as for the peasant comment, i would have gone with proletariat, but peasant works.

View PostRon_Mexico, on 23 April 2014 - 04:48 PM, said:

Now that i've had a few drinks, I'm ready to admilt that the reason I dont post more is suited.

I hate every fiber of his being. He's awful and everything he writes is wrong, coupled with being annoying. Its uncanny how awful he is. If he was around when this thread was thriving, he would have killed it. Thankfully, he wasnt.

Maybe in the real world, he's not so awful (evidence says otherwise) but here, he makes me want to fight. Nobody makes me want to fight. Its beyond weird. I almost feel bad, but I dont




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