Dealer Farted At The B&m

[sixhands 0]

There aren't necessarily pain receptors around the anus. I don't know about you, but I detect spiciness when I defecate spice; whereas you claim to experience pain while defocating (sic). The two aren't mutually exclusive either.Look at it developmentally, both orifices had similar origins too, see the definition of cloaca.Discuss.

Way too much time on your hands dude

[Potsie P 0]

I farted at a Kohl's recently. I know, good times all around. Unfortunately, my "read" on my own butthorn was way off, as the abrupt noise surprised even me. I totally would've been busted by two chicks shopping if I hadn't pointed to my two-year-old and shrugged with a classic "what can you do?" face. I think it may have worked. Actually, I'm pretty sure it didn't, which is why I went outside and hid in the car while my wife finished shopping.My point is, even if you could bring a kid to a poker table, don't. People won't buy your "what can you do" face, either.

[holdinmynutz 0]

I farted while reading this thread. Twice.I agree with the above poster's statement about the need to be professional though, especially if its a hooker.

as i was reading this - same reaction/thoughts as my quote...lol - TOD?

[seemorenuts 0]

Let me sum up the wisdom that we can all inhale from this thread:Poker is all about the money, just make sure you take the money, no point in winning arguments, looking smart, etc.The rampant farter is emblematic of this philosophy--who cares who you offend, is it +ev? That's all that matters.Now sometimes it is indeed -ev to fart, let's say a maniac is about to sit down to play but he'd leave if you farted, that's straightforward. Same things apply to objects emanating from your mouth. Remember, the anus is just an edentulous mouth.Nonetheless, the fart is a powerful aspect of overall poker prowess, and when you are away from the table, wherever you are, as you fart, remember this thread, and do your best.Wise dealers who fart already possess the above wisdom, and their actions should be considered analogous to shouting "Amen" or "Hallelujah" in church; (no offense intended).I find that red meat produces the heartiest farts, they offend the most; but for sheer quantity, beans and broccoli can't be beat.Hope this helps, and may the fart be with you, and through you.

[rivergirl 2]

A good rip-roaring table clearing fart is something to stand up and take ownership of....be proud. On the other hand...the person at the table (no offense guys, but i've only seen this in men) who hasn't showered in a month and wears hi karate to cover this fact up....really annoys me. What also annoys me is the idea that no floor person can not approach this person, becuase that would be offensive to him.....so instead he offends the 50 people within noseshot and that's ok. Go figurePS....this IS the funniest thread EVER!!!

[suicideking 0]

The only way to deal with this is to beat the dealer at his own game....he farts, you **** your pants. Tell him you have no problem taking this to an escalation point where you would bareass, softserve shotgun the table. Now that may be a semi-bluff, but lets see if he calls.

Best reply ever....still

[holdinmynutz 0]

not to step in on the gas goin on here, but dogpatch, reply to the Tritz comment in the other thread - i owe you something.

[seemorenuts 0]

Lol, speaking of body odor, I'm laughing now at the solomobile.ca commercial that opens with a French baker who answers the phone saying, "no, I do not wear deodorant" as an insult to French people.I like to smell my worst at the casino if this has tilting value. It also clears up an entire section of the bus so I can lie down for the 2 hour ride. I like to walk around town with a slovenly look so my chances of getting mugged are lower. There's no disadvantage when it comes to picking up women because they are generally astounded at my high level of confidence what with the smell. I figure I have them thinking, "wow, I gotta get in his pants, he's got verve!" Also, a good stink lowers the chance that I'll get chased like in those Axe commercials.One last thing, I don't bathe regularly so that I get used to the smell--I think it's called habituation.Hey, I'm not just a poker player, I'm a professional. Hope you kids appreciate this advice--it's golden!

[RuntCake 0]

All in all, I think somewhere between a meal and a 5 hour session, you are bound to let one fly.As to the dealer being an *** -- well, if he's not getting his break or push, sometimes you just can't hold it.Maybe he/she came to work sick so your dum *** could have someone toss cards at you because you can't be trusted to do it yourself.

[Flushgarden 0]

I was sitting in the 1 seat during a live tourney the other night and I'm pretty sure the dealer cut a nasty one loose.

[nutzzcase 0]

there is(was) some ****'dup people in this forum

[doox 15]

I STILL love this thread.

FMP.