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Dealer Farted At The B&m


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Don't you just hate it when you are playing live and you just got done eating mexican food, and you rip a gigantic/smelly fart and you're in the middle of a critical hand and it throws off your concentration?
Yes
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Live people are the worst. I've played with older folks in the nl game here in San Diego that have shit themselves and tried to play through it without skipping a beat. I don't know if theres much I haven't seen at the poker tables.
Dead people smell after a while...js
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So this is what poker-playing adults talk about all day.. I've always wondered
You from Vernon?
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At CasinoRama the miniKitchen near the pokerroom uses this strong smelling cleaning agentaround 5am every night. Players will whiff this and start accusing others of letting one rip.I seize this opportunity to let fly, to neutralize the chemicals in the air, and hence I've realizedthat farts are actually part of natural selection--enhancing our survival in this evolutionary adaptive modern environment.Another time, I was doing quite well at a 1/2 NL cash game (same venue) and had to let a few silent killers out to play.Well, the guy to my left, a good tight player, finally queried me as to whether or not I authored these babies.I laughed and fessed up, adding, "I learnt these farts from a poker book, how to put the table on tilt and control the table."It was an unexpected bonus that he laughed and complimented the joke. I'd figure that most fart victims would only express pure hatred. You had to be there...Another time I mistakenly told the brush that I thought an old dealer had b.o.I had to correct myself later, I had discovered that the little, chatty East Indian guy to my right had taken off hisshoes and socks and was stinking up the joint. I had no problem commenting to him that it smelled, he retorted that there was no reason to be rude. To which I said, "hey, I'll take rude over smelly any day" but no one elseseemed to care... I switched tables.Any real stinker stories out there?

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I've played with older folks in the nl game here in San Diego that have shit themselves and tried to play through it without skipping a beat. I don't know if theres much I haven't seen at the poker tables.
Well if they're just waiting for the blinds to come around to them, then that's understandable. But if they play through another rotation without dealing with the situation, then that's just plain wrong.
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When I want to play an extra long session, I just grab a pair of these.depend_protective_violator.gif

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I've played with older folks in the nl game here in San Diego that have shit themselves and tried to play through it without skipping a beat.
Maybe they were just trying to give off a false tell......
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  • 1 month later...

I needed a laugh today so I am revisiting one of the funniest threads ever on FCP. Still cracks me up over a month later. For those of you who missed it the first time around, enjoy!

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double header my 2 fartsWent to get up from table with serious gas cramps held it for 8 hands, lighter fell out of pocket bent over to pick it up and it crept out in a guys face almost got killed for that onewas in kinder lou and the dealer at the 5/5 table at coushata proudly bent over on his left leg and let out the most horrendous fog horn sounding fart i ever heard.bad thing was there was a chick taking a drink and spit beer all over the table then stood up and cused him out.

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double header my 2 fartsWent to get up from table with serious gas cramps held it for 8 hands, lighter fell out of pocket bent over to pick it up and it crept out in a guys face almost got killed for that onewas in kinder lou and the dealer at the 5/5 table at coushata proudly bent over on his left leg and let out the most horrendous fog horn sounding fart i ever heard.bad thing was there was a chick taking a drink and spit beer all over the table then stood up and cused him out.
hahahahahhahahahahaha, i love the dealer just let it rip
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You know how the expression goes, "(s)he doesn't think his/her **** stinks"?I love the smell of my farts. Therefore, my **** don't stink.Especially after buying $50 worth of cherries last week, man, what a heavenly aroma!What foods do that for you? Hey, a loophole around the 'no posting about food rule!'Yippee!Fart on, brothers, fart on!

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Okay, I should really start a new thread on this but I don't want to get killed.Today I was mulling over a strange question and I discovered an even stranger question, are you ready for this?You know how when you eat really spicy food, that when it eventually passes through your system, that you can sense the hotness of the peppers at your anus?Well, it's the same sensation as you experience on your taste buds throughout your oral cavity, right?Tongue, palates, mucosal linings all the way down your throat and up your nose, right?On the other hand, you neither get that spicy, hot sensation in your stomach nor throughout your intestines, right?So does that mean your anus has taste buds?Discuss.

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Okay, I should really start a new thread on this but I don't want to get killed.Today I was mulling over a strange question and I discovered an even stranger question, are you ready for this?You know how when you eat really spicy food, that when it eventually passes through your system, that you can sense the hotness of the peppers at your anus?Well, it's the same sensation as you experience on your taste buds throughout your oral cavity, right?Tongue, palates, mucosal linings all the way down your throat and up your nose, right?On the other hand, you neither get that spicy, hot sensation in your stomach nor throughout your intestines, right?So does that mean your anus has taste buds?Discuss.
I just threw up in my mouth a little.
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Okay, I should really start a new thread on this but I don't want to get killed.Today I was mulling over a strange question and I discovered an even stranger question, are you ready for this?You know how when you eat really spicy food, that when it eventually passes through your system, that you can sense the hotness of the peppers at your anus?Well, it's the same sensation as you experience on your taste buds throughout your oral cavity, right?Tongue, palates, mucosal linings all the way down your throat and up your nose, right?On the other hand, you neither get that spicy, hot sensation in your stomach nor throughout your intestines, right?So does that mean your anus has taste buds?Discuss.
Actually, the sensation of heat experienced from eating spicy foods is not stimulus of the tastebuds in your mouth, but rather is stimulus of pain sensors. The stronger the heat of the spicy food the more pain you experience. When thought of in this light, it actually means that people that enjoy very spicy foods are on some level, being masochistic. Likewise, the heat felt on and around the anus during defocation is another group of pain receptors being stimulated. so to answer your question, no your anus does not have taste buds.Cliff notes:Does that mean your anus has taste buds?No you buffoon.
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You know how the expression goes, "(s)he doesn't think his/her **** stinks"?I love the smell of my farts. Therefore, my **** don't stink.Especially after buying $50 worth of cherries last week, man, what a heavenly aroma!What foods do that for you? Hey, a loophole around the 'no posting about food rule!'Yippee!Fart on, brothers, fart on!
That's the grossest thing I've ever heard in my life.
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I just got another epiphany, we can verify the taste bud hypothesis with a hershey bar test.Someone PM Royal_Tour about this, he don't let me PM him no more.Royal_Tour, does your anus have taste buds that can detect the sweetness of a hershey bar?

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Actually, the sensation of heat experienced from eating spicy foods is not stimulus of the tastebuds in your mouth, but rather is stimulus of pain sensors. The stronger the heat of the spicy food the more pain you experience. When thought of in this light, it actually means that people that enjoy very spicy foods are on some level, being masochistic. Likewise, the heat felt on and around the anus during defocation is another group of pain receptors being stimulated. so to answer your question, no your anus does not have taste buds.Cliff notes:Does that mean your anus has taste buds?No you buffoon.
There aren't necessarily pain receptors around the anus. I don't know about you, but I detect spiciness when I defecate spice; whereas you claim to experience pain while defocating (sic). The two aren't mutually exclusive either.Look at it developmentally, both orifices had similar origins too, see the definition of cloaca.Discuss.
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