Dear Nikki

[Nikki_N 17]

Dear Nikki, What do you do when you have a GIANT crush on a girl who is one of your best friends? We've known each other for a few years, we do a lot of stuff together(go out to eat, go to concerts...etc) and I've had a big crush on her for a long time, but I've never done anything about it because for about the last year or so she's had a pretty serious boyfriend. They just broke up about 2 months ago, and from the conversations I've had with her, they're still in a "broken up, kinda-sorta trying to work on it" phase, but she really doesn't think it can ever work because she just doesn't like his personality anymore and by her own admission they're not a very good couple together. Should I just try and sit her down sometime and tell her? I'm scared to do this because not only are her and her ex not completely out of each others lives, but I'm also scared that if she doesn't feel the same way(which is kind of likely) then it will make our friendship kind of akward. Any advice you can give would be appreciated.

You are in a tough spot here, a really tough spot. If she is not totally over this guy and he's not out of her life, I think it would be a bad idea to make a move. I also don't recommend that you spend all your time with her and pining over her when you could be forging relationships with single women. I'm not saying that you shouldn't remain friends and spend time together, I'm just cautioning you to be aware of the amount of time you are spending with her, being her shoulder to cry on and her confidant, to the detriment of your own love life.I'm sorry to tell you dude, but you are on the friend ladder. This is the worst place to be when you are hot for her and she's in breakup mode with her current boyfriend because she will be more emotionally needy than usual.I say don't tell her about the giant crush. Stuff your feelings down and hope to carry on as friends for time immemorial. Don't pine forever. Keep that devotion for later when there's a girl who is hot for you and wants to have your babies. In the mean time, go out and find some hos to put it to.

[chrozzo 19]

Keep that devotion for later when there's a girl who is hot for you and wants to have your babies. In the mean time, go out and find some hos to put it to.

thats beautiful

[Nikki_N 17]

tyty! I need movie recommendations too! :)Mark

Is the Mrs. opposed to porn? I really am tapped out after The Temp and Basic Instinct. 91/2 Weeks was suggested by Jeff and Ren and it's excellent as steamy movies go. Like I said earlier, I don't watch many of those types of show. I like Sci-Fi/Fantasy or bondage and submission porn, pretty much. There's a sexy scene with the Governator and Sharon Stone when they were young and hot in Total Recall. I'm sorry I suck at this topic so much. OOOH, OOOH I've got one!Dangerous Liasons has all sorts of naked famous folk in it. I guess it lacks a lot of actual sex, though. Damn.

[NoSup4U 0]

Is the Mrs. opposed to porn? I really am tapped out after The Temp and Basic Instinct. 91/2 Weeks was suggested by Jeff and Ren and it's excellent as steamy movies go. Like I said earlier, I don't watch many of those types of show. I like Sci-Fi/Fantasy or bondage and submission porn, pretty much. There's a sexy scene with the Governator and Sharon Stone when they were young and hot in Total Recall. I'm sorry I suck at this topic so much. OOOH, OOOH I've got one!Dangerous Liasons has all sorts of naked famous folk in it. I guess it lacks a lot of actual sex, though. Damn.

Yeah, we aren't into porn really. I don't know the Temp, I'll check that out. No worries though, you can't be expected to answer EVERY question perfectly. Of course, since its the only question I've asked in here I expected better... ;)j/k, keep up the good work. We ended up renting 9 1/2 weeks and Wild Things for NYE, so we should be golden there.Mark

[David_Nicoson 1]

Dear Nikki, What do you do when you have a GIANT crush on a girl who is one of your best friends? We've known each other for a few years, we do a lot of stuff together(go out to eat, go to concerts...etc) and I've had a big crush on her for a long time, but I've never done anything about it because for about the last year or so she's had a pretty serious boyfriend. They just broke up about 2 months ago, and from the conversations I've had with her, they're still in a "broken up, kinda-sorta trying to work on it" phase, but she really doesn't think it can ever work because she just doesn't like his personality anymore and by her own admission they're not a very good couple together. Should I just try and sit her down sometime and tell her? I'm scared to do this because not only are her and her ex not completely out of each others lives, but I'm also scared that if she doesn't feel the same way(which is kind of likely) then it will make our friendship kind of akward. Any advice you can give would be appreciated.

I think it's very likely that she already knows you're interested. Don't feel too much stress about revealing this fact. You may still choose to keep it unspoken, but women just know stuff.

[mtdesmoines 3]

Dear Nikki, What do you do when you have a GIANT crush on a girl who is one of your best friends? We've known each other for a few years, we do a lot of stuff together(go out to eat, go to concerts...etc) and I've had a big crush on her for a long time, but I've never done anything about it because for about the last year or so she's had a pretty serious boyfriend. They just broke up about 2 months ago, and from the conversations I've had with her, they're still in a "broken up, kinda-sorta trying to work on it" phase, but she really doesn't think it can ever work because she just doesn't like his personality anymore and by her own admission they're not a very good couple together. Should I just try and sit her down sometime and tell her? I'm scared to do this because not only are her and her ex not completely out of each others lives, but I'm also scared that if she doesn't feel the same way(which is kind of likely) then it will make our friendship kind of akward. Any advice you can give would be appreciated.

Chances are 90% that she's not interested in you. Chances are 90% that making a move on her will ruin the friendship.On the bright side, there are a lot of friends to be made and girls to meet, so 10% ain't as bad as it seems.

[onlyme386 0]

Ok Nikki, you got me. I'm finally asking, only b/c this was a bump that was a long time in the making.I'm a college student, will graduate in about 5 months. I go to school about 300 miles from home, and there is a girl there I'm really in to. She knows this too, but is undecided how she feels. She is definitely at least somewhat interested though. I'll be home over Christmas break and we have a ton of friends in common so we'll probably be hanging out quite a bit. What is my best course of action to get something going with this girl? Note that I'm not looking to have sex with her, I'm just interested in a relationship at some point. Not even necessarily now, as I will move back there when I graduate. How do I make sure the door stays open over next semester for that possibility later on?Thanks!

I'm letting her go b/c she's not who I thought/hoped she was. And I feel great about it, so that's good.

so i dated this chick for6 yrs and we been apart2 shes had a bf for 2 1/2 years.......w/e man I miss her so much loved her for 8 yrs turned a lil crazy after we broke up so havent talked much since...I always say merry xmas what do you guys think of this e mail what would you change and what not....merry christmas allHey susan,Merry Christmas susan, I hope everything is well. I know it's been awhile since we have talked and I am sure neither of us are really happy about it. I do miss you being around of course. It seems like a life time ago that we were as close as can be. I would like to be friends after all love is love and I know we were in love. Basically I heard many sayings that have reminded me of you or us and the one that sticks out is everyone likes being told someone loves them and I Mich like I said years ago I love you and I will love you forever, love doesnt just dissapear and I hope you feel the same way.rough 1st draft drunk ex gf emailthis is what I sentMerry christmas I miss you and hope everythings wellthoughts i need her back?

This is FWP, in case anyone was curious. http://thepokerhaus.com/forum/viewtopic.php?id=4982 proof = in pudding

[Nikki_N 17]

I'm letting her go b/c she's not who I thought/hoped she was. And I feel great about it, so that's good. This is FWP, in case anyone was curious. http://thepokerhaus.com/forum/viewtopic.php?id=4982 proof = in pudding

Interesting.

[valtempest 0]

You're in IN or are you going to travel from NY for this? I think the invite to the cabin may be fun, but you should feel completely comfortable with not going the way of the threesome if revenge is even a little bit a part of your motive. If you want to sleep with these people because it will be fun and awesome, I say go for it, but if there are going to be any possible repercussions that may jeopardize the guy's relationship with his buddy or your relationship with this girl (have they done this before? Is there the possibility of jealousy developing by him or her if things go "too well" with one or the other?) I'll be the first to tell you that group sex and threesomes can be a whole lot of fun, but being the third can be complicated. Just think it over and decide on your course of action before you start drinking. Don't let the alcohol associated with NYE make the decision for you. Good luck. I have grabbed his ass. It was nice.

Thank you for your reply. You are right, I did have a bit of revenge in mind, so I decided to spend New Years with my grandma back home. And I'm glad I did! Its been while since I've been home. I feel more centered than I have in months! Thanks again, kisses!

[RhinestoneCowboy 2]

This is FWP, in case anyone was curious. http://thepokerhaus.com/forum/viewtopic.php?id=4982 proof = in pudding

people are so jelous of NE fans/teams these days they have to resort to this....how bout what happens between the lines when we go 19-0 youll post all about riots and our parades.....get the candy cane out of your ass

Has anyone figured out who this is? I'm guessing FWP...

Yeah...that was an easy one

[aadams_22 3]

This is FWP, in case anyone was curious. http://thepokerhaus.com/forum/viewtopic.php?id=4982 proof = in pudding

I saw 5 FCP'ers in that thread

[Nikki_N 17]

Thank you for your reply. You are right, I did have a bit of revenge in mind, so I decided to spend New Years with my grandma back home. And I'm glad I did! Its been while since I've been home. I feel more centered than I have in months! Thanks again, kisses!

I'm glad you had a good holiday. Kisses back!

[mtdesmoines 3]

Yeah, we aren't into porn really. I don't know the Temp, I'll check that out. No worries though, you can't be expected to answer EVERY question perfectly. Of course, since its the only question I've asked in here I expected better... ;)j/k, keep up the good work. We ended up renting 9 1/2 weeks and Wild Things for NYE, so we should be golden there.Mark

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnnnddddddddddddddddd..............?

[chrozzo 19]

Dear Nikki,This isnt about me....but its a delicate situation that I wanted to ask advice about. I am very close to my cousins in Buffalo....and even cloer to one in particular. She has been dating this one guy for over 2 years...and theyve both told me it was getting serious. Then about a month ago...she felt she needed a break, somr time to think. I dont pretend to know what thats aout, and I dont care, but since then theyve been apart. They talk once in a while at school, but since the holiday break they have not seen eachother. I have become very close friends with him as well over the past years. They both confide in me, and I will never betray their trust. I never have told them what the other has told me about the relationship. We do alot of things together, but occationally they both ask me how the other is doing, so we usually tlak about it a little bit.Anyways, ive been in Buffalo area for past week. Im staying at my aunts house with her and the other cousins. I hung out with him 2x now, and most recently this afternoon. My cousins are all going to this one place we go on thur night tongiht, a country line dancing club...always fun. Anyways, he hasnt been in a while, but he mentioned he was going with a friend fomr work (nota date) and was suprised to hear we were going too. So aparently he called her and told her he would be there and could they talk some when there. She agreed. Then sehe went to work and jus got hom about 30 min ago. She was pissed at me bc i wouldnt tell her anything we talked about today. I was like WTF i never do anyways. But i think its because its about that she might see him tongiht, and now debating about wether or not to go. Shes on the phone now arguing with him about something...and is getting pissed at me bc she thinks i orchestrated this thing tongiht.I love them both..and I hate arguing with anyone...he is fin witht he fact i dont tell him anything she says....but how do I tell her why i keep silent...she doenst seem to get it....even whens she not upset.Thanks,Christian

[SFAWFD 1]

Dear Nikki,This isnt about me....but its a delicate situation that I wanted to ask advice about. I am very close to my cousins in Buffalo....and even cloer to one in particular. She has been dating this one guy for over 2 years...and theyve both told me it was getting serious. Then about a month ago...she felt she needed a break, somr time to think. I dont pretend to know what thats aout, and I dont care, but since then theyve been apart. They talk once in a while at school, but since the holiday break they have not seen eachother. I have become very close friends with him as well over the past years. They both confide in me, and I will never betray their trust. I never have told them what the other has told me about the relationship. We do alot of things together, but occationally they both ask me how the other is doing, so we usually tlak about it a little bit.Anyways, ive been in Buffalo area for past week. Im staying at my aunts house with her and the other cousins. I hung out with him 2x now, and most recently this afternoon. My cousins are all going to this one place we go on thur night tongiht, a country line dancing club...always fun. Anyways, he hasnt been in a while, but he mentioned he was going with a friend fomr work (nota date) and was suprised to hear we were going too. So aparently he called her and told her he would be there and could they talk some when there. She agreed. Then sehe went to work and jus got hom about 30 min ago. She was pissed at me bc i wouldnt tell her anything we talked about today. I was like WTF i never do anyways. But i think its because its about that she might see him tongiht, and now debating about wether or not to go. Shes on the phone now arguing with him about something...and is getting pissed at me bc she thinks i orchestrated this thing tongiht.I love them both..and I hate arguing with anyone...he is fin witht he fact i dont tell him anything she says....but how do I tell her why i keep silent...she doenst seem to get it....even whens she not upset.Thanks,Christian

Drink more?

[pocket3s 0]

Dear Nikki,I know that I don't know you guys very well but that actually helps with my problem. So I've been with my wife almost half my life and her family is like my family. Her sisters are like my sisters, maybe even more so than my actual sisters. So her youngest sister is Jamie, she is 18... I am 26 btw. So she decided to confide in me and only me as far as the family goes that she is a lesbian. I was fine with that and due to her age I knew that it wasn't set in stone and she would have plenty of time to figure that out. So then I meet her gf or the latest one anyway and that's where the problem lies. The girl is 14. Now I have many concerns including the legality, the ethics(is she forcing this on this girl), can she trust this girl with this secret(young people tend to have big mouths). Now up until now I have kept this secret even from my wife. She comes from a very religious family and while I don't believe they will disown her or anything, it won't go over well. I voiced my concerns to her and gave her all the negatives but she insist that they love each other and blah blah blah. So what do I do? Do I betray her confidence and bring an authority figure in?ThanksStephen

[Nikki_N 17]

Dear Nikki,This isnt about me....but its a delicate situation that I wanted to ask advice about. I am very close to my cousins in Buffalo....and even cloer to one in particular. She has been dating this one guy for over 2 years...and theyve both told me it was getting serious. Then about a month ago...she felt she needed a break, somr time to think. I dont pretend to know what thats aout, and I dont care, but since then theyve been apart. They talk once in a while at school, but since the holiday break they have not seen eachother. I have become very close friends with him as well over the past years. They both confide in me, and I will never betray their trust. I never have told them what the other has told me about the relationship. We do alot of things together, but occationally they both ask me how the other is doing, so we usually tlak about it a little bit.Anyways, ive been in Buffalo area for past week. Im staying at my aunts house with her and the other cousins. I hung out with him 2x now, and most recently this afternoon. My cousins are all going to this one place we go on thur night tongiht, a country line dancing club...always fun. Anyways, he hasnt been in a while, but he mentioned he was going with a friend fomr work (nota date) and was suprised to hear we were going too. So aparently he called her and told her he would be there and could they talk some when there. She agreed. Then sehe went to work and jus got hom about 30 min ago. She was pissed at me bc i wouldnt tell her anything we talked about today. I was like WTF i never do anyways. But i think its because its about that she might see him tongiht, and now debating about wether or not to go. Shes on the phone now arguing with him about something...and is getting pissed at me bc she thinks i orchestrated this thing tongiht.I love them both..and I hate arguing with anyone...he is fin witht he fact i dont tell him anything she says....but how do I tell her why i keep silent...she doenst seem to get it....even whens she not upset.Thanks,Christian

This situation is a mess. I'm not sure what you should do about the immediate problem of your sis being pissed at you for having information she doesn't from her ex. I think you should tell her to talk to him herself. It doesn't sound like you know very much about what he wants to say to her, anyway. In the future, I would lay down the law with these two to leave you out of their relationship, or lack thereof, whatever the case may be. There is no reason for you to be stuck in the middle of this. They both have other friends that can be on their side without a conflict of interest, yes? Save yourself the grief and tell them to leave you out of it. Good luck, darling.

Dear Nikki,I know that I don't know you guys very well but that actually helps with my problem. So I've been with my wife almost half my life and her family is like my family. Her sisters are like my sisters, maybe even more so than my actual sisters. So her youngest sister is Jamie, she is 18... I am 26 btw. So she decided to confide in me and only me as far as the family goes that she is a lesbian. I was fine with that and due to her age I knew that it wasn't set in stone and she would have plenty of time to figure that out. So then I meet her gf or the latest one anyway and that's where the problem lies. The girl is 14. Now I have many concerns including the legality, the ethics(is she forcing this on this girl), can she trust this girl with this secret(young people tend to have big mouths). Now up until now I have kept this secret even from my wife. She comes from a very religious family and while I don't believe they will disown her or anything, it won't go over well. I voiced my concerns to her and gave her all the negatives but she insist that they love each other and blah blah blah. So what do I do? Do I betray her confidence and bring an authority figure in?ThanksStephen

Wow. You are in a horrible situation. Now, first off, she may be experimenting, or she may be a lesbian for the long haul, but don't diminish her sexuality by claiming that it's her age. Her immature behavior with an underage person is a result of her age, but if you disparage her sexuality to her claiming that she's young and doesn't know better yet, she will shut you down immediately. I'm not sure you should spill the beans to her the family about her sexuality. I think it's not fair to you that your SIL has confided in you something you aren't supposed to tell your wife. In my opinion, if you tell something to a married person, you cannot rightfully ask them to keep it from their spouse. Unfortunately for you, the cat is out of the bag on this one and you have to struggle with the moral dilemma of keeping a confidence at the risk of angering your wife when she finds out that her sis is a lesbian and you've known all along (your wife WILL find out eventually, btw...18 year old girls have big mouths, too.). While I don't know about the legal ramifications in your state (some states outlaw homosexual acts of any sort and age of consent laws vary widely from place to place), I do know that while 4 years is a small gap between mature people in a relationship, it is practically a lifetime in teen years. In my opinion the relationship is inappropriate and would be if it were a heterosexual relationship, too. Pretend your SIL is a boy and is dating a 14 year old girl. It's creepy. If this young girl's family finds out, there could be legal or physical danger to your SIL. You don't know what an angry family might cook up when this story breaks. If it is possible for you to counsel your SIL to end this, do it. Be as kind as you can as long as it is effective. If she persists in playing the "in love therefore age doesn't matter" card, you may go as far as to threaten to approach the parents of her gf. This will likely alter your confidant relationship with your SIL permanently, but she needs to date girls that aren't children. I know she's barely beyond childhood, herself, but if she really cares for this girl, she won't ask this 14 year old to make adult decisions about love and sex before she's grown up enough to handle it. If this is too much for you, you could tell your wife and wash your hands of it, because I'm sure you in-laws won't hesitate to intervene in some way, but if you feel like she'll be shunned for her sexual preference and you want to try to help spare her all of the grief, you could try to sway her to see this point of view... that is if you agree with me and don't think my POV is a bunch of crap. Good luck to you, sir.

[chrozzo 19]

tyn nikkiweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[pocket3s 0]

Thanks for the advice. I don't tell her that I think it might be a phase bc of her age, it's just something that I keep in mind as a possibility. This is also the reason I haven't told my wife, I don't want it to be a huge deal and then have the SIL change her mind next month. I've went every route I can think of. I sat her down and told her all the negatives. I even told her that if she got caught that she would prob serve jail time, then when she got out she would be a registered sex offender. No dice. But because the previous statement is true, I can't go to the gf parents and risk them pressing charges. I guess I'm just going to have one more chat with her, maybe raise my voice a little and see what the result is.

[troyomac 0]

3's, how would your wife feel if she found out about this later on, and found out that you knew all along? Personally, I think that there should be no secrets in a marriage.

[renaedawn 1]

3's, how would your wife feel if she found out about this later on, and found out that you knew all along? Personally, I think that there should be no secrets in a marriage.

Hahahahhahahhahahaha, you're funny.I'm laughing along with your wife. Her side hurts.

[Jadaki 0]

I think you should try to make her straight again. This lesbian phase is nothing a good deep dicking won't fix.

[Ouch-8s 4]

I think you should try to make her straight again. This lesbian phase is nothing a good deep dicking won't fix.

you talking about the SIL or the girlfriend?

[Jadaki 0]

you talking about the SIL or the girlfriend?

Does it matter?

[Dogpatch 2]

I think you should try to make her straight again. This lesbian phase is nothing a good deep dicking won't fix.

All every woman really wants, be it mother, senator, nun, is some serious deep-dickin'. I declare today to be Jason Lee Day.