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Favorite Family Guy Moments


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when one of them says "this is the worst day ever," then they show a guy in hiroshima in 1945 and he says "oh no, i got a ticket" and then he gets splashed by a car thats driving by, and he says "could this day get any worse?" and then you hear the universal sound of something falling, and you see the shadow getting bigger...and bigger...and closer....and then its a baboon instead of the atomic bomb.

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In the episode where Meg makes the flag-girl squad, at the end of the episode after she's left the party, Quagmire shows up:*Quagmire rings the doorbell**Teenage Girl opens the door*"Hey there, sweetie. How old are you?""16""18? You're First""MOM!""I like where this is going. giggidy giggidy giggidy"

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My two personal favorites:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xgpvsnQwZ0Ihttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GUsfrGcz0m0There was always something about Ollie Williams' first appearance (IT'S GON' RAIN) that cracked me up every time too. Still can't figure out what.

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"Alright the first item up for bid is a pair of womens panties."Quagmire: "Fifty bucks.""..she had 9 STDs."Quagmire: "Forty five bucks.""...and when we found her, she wet herself."Quagmire: "Fifty bucks."

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Peter (or maybe someone else): Look at those sneaky clouds up there, always plotting something.The camera then pans to the sky and two clouds, who happen to have mouths.Cloud 1: We attack at dawn.Cloud 2: Right.Cloud 1: I mean it this time. We're really gonna do it.Cloud 2: No, no, I know. Im ready.

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One of my favorites:Rich Father: My Margaret, what a sub-par ham.Rich Mother: Perhaps I can't bake a ham, but what I can cook up is a little grace and civility at the table.[pause]Rich Father: [to daughter] Patty, did you know your mother is a whore? Another:Fred: Gee wizz, gang. Looks like the killer gutted the victim, strangled him with his own intestines and then dumped the body in the river.Velma: Jenkies. What a mystery!Scooby: (inaudible)Fred: You're right Scoob. We're dealing with one sick son of a bitch!

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Doug: Hello, sir. Peter: Enough with the foreplay. What are you selling? Doug: Well, I was gonna try to sell you some "handsome cream" but I can see you already bought out the store! Peter: Go on. Doug: Perhaps you'd be interested in something every homeowner cannot be without. Doug: Volcano insurance! Peter: Go on. Doug: According to my uncle, who's a real whiz with volcanoes a volcano is coming this way! Peter: PETER [Thinking]: I, too, have an uncle. Peter: Come in. ---inside the house---Peter: How much is this volcano insurance? Doug: I don't know. Let's say, $200. Peter: $200? That's more than I spent on all that handsome cream. Peter: I don't have that kind of money! Doug: What about that jar of money? Peter: No way! That's Lois' rainy day fund. Doug: Come on, it never rains in Rhode Island. Peter: Yeah, but I'm pretty sure we've never had a volcano either. Doug: Well, don't you think we're overdue for one? Peter: Touché, salesman.Another funny quotePeter: You better watch who you call a child because if I'm a child then you're a pedophile! I'll be damned if I'm gonna stand here and be lectured by a pervert!

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From the Fat man Strangler:Stewie: Find your penis, 1$!Brian: There, see? You're so fat you have your own orbit.Stewie: So, um, I was just upstairs and there's a half dead fat guy eating a dead fat guy. (pause) So I guess we're just going to look the other way, huh?

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Peter: Man, I haven't felt this terrible since that time I went to that museum---flashback---Peter(Age 6); Why did all the dinosaurs die out?Teacher; Because you touch yourself at night

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