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I Called In Sick Today


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And you'll definitely be able to get into my head and make me lose every hole. All you gotta do is show up <10 minutes before the tee time. Show up late and we might as well not even plus because I'll be so worked up about it.

 

But I'll still put up the money.

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If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

and after 3 days, he is risen!

Pocket change cost me my first and only black girlfriend.   It was in the middle of a roaring poker boom and I was flush in ways most men don't even bother dreaming of. Money, it was like dirt to me

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Damn, looks like Ronnie just stepped in it.

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Where is Randy Reed?

 

I don't know, but he just followed me on Twitter yesterday. So he's around somewhere.

 

 

We did it! All thanks to my lawyer who's worth every cent.

 

AD92ECFE-C108-4D80-9B43-6A4E834C162E_zpsyns2evw0.jpg

Katherine Klingseis is a super nice person. I'm really excited for her that she got a lead front page article in a Gannett Newspaper.

 

She was editor in chief of the Daily at one point.

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Now, I've never gambled on golf because when I played with peers 17-20 years ago I wasn't good enough to keep score, and now I mostly play with the wife and in-laws

 

That would be considered a pricey game, right? Or no?

 

I'm right around 100 every time, give or take, so if you're better, I'd need a couple of strokes per side.

 

Showing up late, that's funny. I like to warm up so I'd have to hit another course, warm up, then show up right in time to get my cart and drive to the tee box.

 

The most I could lose is $460 That would sting. Maybe $10 a hole, $25 a side. That would be a max loss of $230, which would still sting for a Saturday round of golf. But more manageable than $500 dollars. Not counting the 4 closest to the pin holes

 

That's interesting though.

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Yeah, that'd be a pretty pricey game.

 

I don't think I'd actually play for that with a friend. The amount doesn't bother me but I know most (normal) people aren't degenerates and would balk at possibly losing that much or feel bad about taking that much from a friend and I wouldn't want to ruin our friendship, Ronnie. I'm cool with playing for zero dollars. Me and my buddy usually play that adjusted for $5/hole when we go out and avg win/loss is probably $40 since we're pretty equal.

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No, you're right, it's interesting because I like the idea of gambling a little on it. Nothing that is gonna cause fights, but for me, gambling has to sting a little when you lose for it to feel good if I win. If I have to pay out $8 dollars or something stupid at the end of the round, who cares, what's the point? But needing to sink a putt to wipe off a $50 skin would be interesting. Something on the line is fun.

 

I don't sports bet at all, so I only gamble when in a casino.

 

My buddy and I used to bet when we bowled but would just get drunk, never pay and just try to pick up the check at lunch or the bar

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This trip is going to be epic. Golf, gambling, strippers, boobs, and beer.

 

I don't do strip clubs anymore. Although I would.

 

Loved them when I was younger, realized you can get more for less elsewhere as I got older.

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just try to pick up the check at lunch or the bar

 

I wish I had friends that would try to pick up a check every once in a while...

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I wish I had friends that would try to pick up a check every once in a while...

 

Motherfu

 

I hope you know, I spoke to my people there and had Kimberly fired for letting you pay

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I really wish that i had a friend to go with all the time and there was one worth going too around here. I like strip clubs.

 

Jerk joints are so much better

 

Would you rather go to the steakhouse (in your case, Chipotle) and they just let you look at and smell the food or would you rather eat? I'd rather eat.

 

But it took me a few years and plenty of money to figure this out. And yeah, I agree, strip clubs are fun. Not for the dances, I don't really want tha unless someone really moved me. But the people watching is awesome and I love thinking about why the girls work there. I wouldn't actually ask them though

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7 Miles at 10:55 min/mile for an estimated 2:28:19 13.1 miles, Ronald. Granted this was a fairly hilly course with a strong wind that was hardly in my favor and the race course is slight uphill for the first 3 miles and then downhill the rest of the way. It seems unlikely I'll be able to get my 2:15 goal. Should have made your bet while the odds were still somewhat in your favor.

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I would assume that donations are pretty seasonal. Is that factored into your variances?

 

Kind of, we've got two deadlines each year. End of calendar year, where we beg for donations and make it a tax deduction (immovable), and our end of fiscal, where we beg for donations, and assign benefits to it (like give today, and we'll give you extra puppies, rainbows, and cures for diseases).

 

Last end of fiscal, our timing got honked up so the money came in later. This is still the most amount of philanthropic dollars this organization has seen, when it hasn't been tied to a building campaign, or an expensive gala.

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I wish I had friends that would try to pick up a check every once in a while...
You do. :)
Motherfu

 

I hope you know, I spoke to my people there and had Kimberly fired for letting you pay

He was just paying it forward.
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Stop talking like me, people are going to figure out that I'm your joke account.

 

Suited's acct is already a joke acct. you seen some of those top 10 lists?

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Suited, talk to us, what's happening? What's is like to be an under 30 up and coming professional, living in the big city, making bank and living the life? I picture you in a fancy outfit, after work,

corner seat at the trendy bar/restaurant, having dinner and an Old Fashioned, a la RG in CSL

 

This needs to happen at least 3 days a week. You'd probably accidentally fall into some P. Do it for me. FOR MEEEEE

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