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I Called In Sick Today


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If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

and after 3 days, he is risen!

Pocket change cost me my first and only black girlfriend.   It was in the middle of a roaring poker boom and I was flush in ways most men don't even bother dreaming of. Money, it was like dirt to me

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Just dropped a DX suck it in on the audit manager for saying my ribbon belt was trash. He also talked shit about my killshots I wore yesterday.

 

I understand almost all the words in this sentence, just not in the context you used them.

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I understand almost all the words in this sentence, just not in the context you used them.

 

I understood it completely. What the hell is going on here? When did I start getting everything and others don't?

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It's 'cause you're on fleek and Guap is not.

 

If there is one thing that people have constantly said about me over the years, it's that I'm always on fleek.

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I know it's time to get s new job, because I have mentally placed the stuff in my office back in my apartment, and I just bought a jigger on my break.

 

jesus Frau, I wasn't aware stuff like that still went on in business.

 

Where's he gonna live?

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I'm glad somebody made that joke.

 

 

 

Do we have to explain to SA what a jigger is, too?

 

You know that drunk Guapo knows.

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You know that drunk Guapo knows.

 

Doubt it...he just buys the liquor he doesn't drink it.

 

 

It's an hourglass looking thing used to measure out liquor. Usually it's 1 oz on one side, 2 ozs on the other.

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Uber update:

 

 

I'm still at a 5 star rating through 30 some odd fares. I thought for sure I would get a bad rating when I was driving these three girls to someone's apartment and it wasn't on GPS and so they just had me take them to the bar instead. That was their original destination but they called an audible on the way, which is fine. But that took them way out of the way and probably cost them an extra $7. They made me wait forever before picking them up though so, we'll call it a wash.

 

A few people have tipped me. A really nice gay couple gave me $10 on a $10 fare which was cool. They really appreciated my joke about im only driving to keep myself from spending money at the bar.

 

Some drunk chick left her clutch. And some dude left his phone. The clutch didn't have any valuables. I should have sold the phone though.

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If there is one thing that people have constantly said about me over the years, it's that I'm always on fleek.

 

 

...and that you might be a blowhard.

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Girl from FL is emailing me again. I think she saw me on linkedin after I changed my email to my personal one. I certainly didn't give it access to snoop around in my inbox, but she must have. I saw several recommended linkedin connections from years ago... group projects from college, people I knew in high school, etc. this shit may as well be facebook.

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Oh it's worse than fb. At least on fb there are some settings you can access and modify with relative ease. I am frequently dumbfounded by the fact that linkedin has ever been taken seriously in the business world. It's just a terrible, terrible site.

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