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I Called In Sick Today


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If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

and after 3 days, he is risen!

Pocket change cost me my first and only black girlfriend.   It was in the middle of a roaring poker boom and I was flush in ways most men don't even bother dreaming of. Money, it was like dirt to me

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Lily, the AT&T girl from the commercials is both cute and hot. Leans cute in those commercials.

 

 

Allison Williams is hot.

 

 

Remember when brvy discovered her years ago and posted her tik tok video right after the Sam Tsui Lady Gaga medley came out. I give brvy full credit

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You should be wearing a shirt and tie, mister manager.

 

 

 

I'm with ya buddy. Have a little professional pride, throw on a collar for fcks sake

 

You guys have to realize who our customers are. Most of them are just guys that couldn't get a real job so they started building sheds for a living. There are rare exceptions, the big account we just got is very corporate, but most go to work in jeans/shorts and a t shirt everyday. And the last thing I want to look like when I drive onto their lot is a buttoned down sales guy. They can see those guys coming from a mile away and it puts them on the defensive right away.

 

That said, most days I wear jeans and a polo.

 

NAps: Did you know that Hoiberg's daughter was so hot? Like ridiculously hot. Apparently she's going to KU in the fall, which makes her a little less hot.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Since everyone else commented...she's not "hot" for me. Super cute and I would brag for a year if I were able to get her to go home with me, no doubt.

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Just heard some lady in a commercial say "I want to be the queen of fried chicken!!" And now I want to drive halfway across town to Popeyes. Good thing they don't deliver or I would be all up in those biscuits.

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Frau, keeping up the sickie tradition of asking for and then completely ignoring the opinions of the other thread members. Nice!

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Just heard some lady in a commercial say "I want to be the queen of fried chicken!!" And now I want to drive halfway across town to Popeyes. Good thing they don't deliver or I would be all up in those biscuits.

 

I love their mashed potatoes and gravy too. Dammit, now I want a 3 piece spicy dark meat combo.

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I can ignore advice all day.

 

 

 

Workplace story time?

 

I have a female peer who I have an antagonistic relationship with. She and I have never gotten along--here's the moment she completely and totally owned my ass.

 

It's a staff appreciation lunch, held in a nice restaurant. We're split up at round tables of 8--somehow I've ended up at her table. She starts talking about children, then her kids, and then goes into a long, detailed story of her decision for home birth and her second child. (The first kid was at a hospital, with a doula. Not good enough.)

 

She had her second kid at home, her husband freaked out and was worthless during the hard labor. I think she ended up squatting in her tub and having the baby there, with someone catching. The specifics of this memory are hazy, because everything's eclipsed by what happened next.

 

She delivered her placenta, saved it, froze it, made it into pills, and then she and her husband ate it. She went on and on. Who's going to stop her? She's eaten placenta. She planned to eat placenta. In her third trimester, she ordered in a special thingamabob to freeze it, she ordered in a pill making machine to put the frozen shavings into, and then ingested. She planted any remaining placenta at the base of a tree. Hey! Did you know when you have that many plans for placenta you have to ration it out? It's a precious resource...

 

Every couple of months I bring this back up with some of my co-workers. Did this really happen? Does anyone else think this is weird? How did my formal thank-you lunch get hijacked with this story? etc.

 

There's no big ending, except our work relationship is continuing to deteriorate, and I'm useless. She's the alpha, the power player. She's eaten afterbirth.

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I hope I never fall prey to that kind of crazy. The placenta thing is gross and dumb and completely worthless, but at least it's harmless.

 

The home birth thing though...yeah, let's take this extremely traumatic violent painful process that modern medicine has basically perfected and go back to where its a flip of the coin on if me and the baby survive. SOUNDS GREAT. Does she vaccinate? I bet she doesn't vaccinate.

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Based on Frau's story and Guy Fieri's copius amount of thumb rings, I never want to live in California

 

I'm probably obnoxious but I definitely would have been cracking wise during or directly after that story. Or got up to use the bathroom then hit the bar for a drink

 

Ironically, I cant stand self-absorption

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The placenta is the snake oil of the 21st century.

 

It's older than that. Without using Google, I was wondering if delivering the placenta is where the word "motherlode" come from?

 

(Aside, I just really looked at your user name. Are you from the 213?)

I hope I never fall prey to that kind of crazy. The placenta thing is gross and dumb and completely worthless, but at least it's harmless.

 

The home birth thing though...yeah, let's take this extremely traumatic violent painful process that modern medicine has basically perfected and go back to where its a flip of the coin on if me and the baby survive. SOUNDS GREAT. Does she vaccinate? I bet she doesn't vaccinate.

 

I know her kids are healthy and go to school, can't remember if it's private or public. The youngest got sick (around age 8) and had a hospital stay. The nurses and doctors literally had to teach him how to swallow a pill.

 

Texts from my brother that I woke up to

 

"I'm getting married March 21"

"Can you be a groomsman"

 

...I, mean, I guess I can?

 

Frau watchu doing that weekend? Wanna use some of my air miles?

 

I'm busy! I'll help plan what the groomsmen wear...

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I thought Frau was at a bar with donors, buying the old geezer a shot

 

No, lunch in a donor's home, and I want to bring something. She like tequila, but I've only seen her at catered events (smaller bar selections...)

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I just got off the phone with my brother.

 

"Yeah, we're not sure what the groomsman are going to wear or if we're going to rent or have you guys get something from JC Penney but it'll be black, red, and silver".

 

I literally started to say "hey, let me know if you need help picking out the stuff because I'm pretty good at finding that stuff for cheap" but he cut me off saying bye when I got to "hey let me kn.." and then we did the awkward "bye :pause:" "oh, ok" "what?" "Bye..what" "ok" "ok" close.

 

This is the same brother who once asked if I was a queer because I ordered a coffee at lunch one time after working outside in the cold all morning. Not a latte or anything. Just straight up black coffee from a diner.

 

I'm sure they'll get the outfits picked out fine.

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