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I Called In Sick Today


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If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

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Circle jerks were only for the guys who got on Deans List. I had to play "eat the cookie" :(.

 

 

Thera...I tried to like your post but it wouldn't let me. Just know I appreciated it.

 

SA...rape. Just rape.

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Seriously. Next time out with her, drink enough to be mildly confident, have a make out sesh, try to take her pants off or her shirt off. If she stops you, ask "what the hell is it we are doing here?" If she gives some bs excuse, pull your dick out and ask "you got a toothache too?"

 

If nobody comes, move the fck on.

 

no, I think he should hire a girl from class to go with him to an event we know his special friend will be attending. you know, just to see if she gets jealous. I mean, might as well go full blown high school romcom at this point.

 

 

****.

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HEY RON: THANKS FOR THE TOP CHEF SPOILERS IN HERE. I REALLY APPRECIATED IT, YOU ****ING DOUCHEBAG!!!!

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well two saturdays ago i texted her to hang out and she didn't respond. so i said to myself thats it, you gotta stop. so i didn't text her or hear from her all that next week. by the next saturday i get a text from my friend that the lady told his girlfriend that she was enjoying dating me, wanted to continue, but that she wished i would be more physical when we go out. so i was all confused because why would she say that after ignoring my text. so i said to myself, i'll text one more time, and thats it. so i texted her monday. she responded. she texted me today. we're supposed to do something tomorrow. i'm sure it will go well (not).

hope you enjoyed it, kid.

 

dude if there was ever a time to take a louis ck bit seriously it is now.

 

 

and I did.

 

Your friend is effing with you.

ORRRRRRR

this girl is fcking retarded. Dating you, yet you don't talk for 2 weeks, and when you do, it's a text exchange? No

Your buddy is effing with you

 

no I seriously doubt his buddy is effing with him. this is right up the female's alley. hot, cold, hot, cold, complain. pretty standard actually. the girl is obviously messing with him for her own amusement, but I seriously don't see any reason why the dude would want to be in on that.

 

Seriously. Next time out with her, drink enough to be mildly confident, have a make out sesh, try to take her pants off or her shirt off. If she stops you, ask "what the hell is it we are doing here?" If she gives some bs excuse, pull your dick out and ask "you got a toothache too?"

If nobody comes, move the fck on.

 

but this here, this is really the only possible move at this point. you've got two options: get her completely out of your life or get your peen cleaned. you have absolutely nothing to lose at this point, so be an asshole and be aggressive. if she doesn't like it, then good, she will leave you alone. continuing to be nice will only keep her stringing you along, and it's better to be alone than strung along (and this even applies to meeting new girls: better to be completely single than to be in a "uh, I'm not sure if she's my girlfriend or not" relationship because that only invites more of her kind). and if she does like it, then bam, vaginal intercourse. it may not result in a relationship which is what I assume you want, but at least you would have "conquered" her at this point, and it will make dealing with her shit all the easier. trust me on this point, this is one I've actually experienced.

 

 

you seriously need to date fat girls. gotta be easier. (though I just tried the same and got rejected just as squarely as I would have with a thin girl, so who knows.)

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We were the "I'm going to get drunk and attempt to shit on your chest" frat.

You're right, that doesn't sound like hazing at all.

 

hey. TFlu or whoever posts about beer. or I guess anyone

 

Stone 11.11.11. Vertical Epic (Red Wine Barrel Aged) - prittay awesome

 

Never had the 11. The 12.12.12 came out a couple months ago, and was very good as well. I've also had the 07 at some point, but have no idea when or if it was good. This was the last year they were making it (the series is over), and they had a couple tastings in CA where you got to try all of them (02-12), but it was like $250, but each beer was paired with a food course.

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HEY RON: THANKS FOR THE TOP CHEF SPOILERS IN HERE. I REALLY APPRECIATED IT, YOU ****ING DOUCHEBAG!!!!

 

I'm not sure if this is serious or not because, you know, this is SOCIAL MEDIA and all. You need to know that this place isn't scared anymore due to the fact that nobody uses any of the other threads. Wanna know how I found out? Yesterday morning, Tom Colicchio tweeted about it. When people griped, he told them to eat it and stay off of social media.

 

But I will do better to avoid specifics next time. What is the proper grace period for a show that airs Wednesday night?

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But I will do better to avoid specifics next time. What is the proper grace period for a show that airs Wednesday night?

 

In this thread? At least a full day for all spoiler-ish shows. Maybe two full days. Maybe a month and change.

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several months. there's spoiler tags and threads dedicated to shows for a reason. in the day of tivo and netflix not nearly as many people watch shows as they air as they used to, and plenty of people like myself prefer to wait until the season is finished and watch the whole thing at thier leisure (pronounced lehsure).

 

in other words ron, you're worse than suited's girlfriend and lance armstrong's bad nut put together.

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It appears I have my office to myself today so I just let out a big fart. Feels good man. I think I just have some easy busy work to do from the audit. Hopefully that will take up most of my day. I guess I could read auditing standards after that if there's nothing else. My manager will probably have some prelim stuff for me to do for next week. Regardless, I should have stuff to do all day which is nice.

 

 

Edit: There's like 4 people here total out of the usual...more than that.

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I don't think there's any chance a drastic change in behavior will be well recieved. If I all of sudden am super sexually aggressive she will recoil because it will seem so out of character. It has to be a gradual sexual ramping, if you will.

 

Hopefully I can take step 1 tonight. The titty grabbing step.

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I don't think there's any chance a drastic change in behavior will be well recieved. If I all of sudden am super sexually aggressive she will recoil because it will seem so out of character. It has to be a gradual sexual ramping, if you will.

 

Hopefully I can take step 1 tonight. The titty grabbing step.

 

Overthinking it is a pretty good plan.

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I don't think there's any chance a drastic change in behavior will be well recieved. If I all of sudden am super sexually aggressive she will recoil because it will seem so out of character. It has to be a gradual sexual ramping, if you will.

 

Hopefully I can take step 1 tonight. The titty grabbing step.

 

well you've been right about how women think thus far so I guess I can't disagree

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let's just arrange a time for me to act as an assailant and you can fight me off, have sex with her. I can double as a cameraman as well. casually open the closet and walk out of the room, whistling.

 

only problem is it may be difficult to make it appear as though it was difficult to fight me off.

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I think I have big hands, but small to average fingers.

 

Kinda like my weiner.

 

And hey, I'm not saying it will be easy to make it believable that you could actually win, but I'll start getting into character now so I can put on the performance of a lifetime. And I'll be sure to be really really drunk

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The drinker you are the more likely, I'd say, that you forget to let me win and put me in a choke hold of some kind. Which would be very amusing I'm sure for any bystanders. The lady might not like it though. Although the Florence nightingale effect could happen, POSSIBILITIES ABOUND!

 

Either way, the combined power of this thread has to be able to get me I there somehow

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Great string of posts after Essay said he was going to take things slow.

 

 

by the next saturday i get a text from my friend that the lady told his girlfriend that she was enjoying dating me, wanted to continue, but that she wished i would be more physical when we go out.

I cannot believe how long this thing with suited is dragging on. truly amazing how girls can twist the knife.

 

Maybe I'm forgetting some details, but it could be that she likes Essay, but still feels uncertain about what he feels because he won't make a fucking move already. I don't know. Either way, I'm all for the fake fight with strat filming it. Was strat filming the post-fight sex too?

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