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I Called In Sick Today


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well that's not a vicious cycle but yeah, that's pretty much how it started with me.I am being productive as a BITCH today!

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If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

and after 3 days, he is risen!

Pocket change cost me my first and only black girlfriend.   It was in the middle of a roaring poker boom and I was flush in ways most men don't even bother dreaming of. Money, it was like dirt to me

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There were three posts that I was going to respond to, but somebody already responded with almost exactly what I was going to say, so...If I didn't have to get up, I would stay in bed until it physically hurt to still be lying in bed.

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That phallic stuffed pizza is disgusting.Even with the free mustard drizzle.

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I don't think he had to pay anything for his ownership. They wanted him for the move to Brooklyn.
Who do I have to give a hj to in order to get a Mad Ants Tshirt? Your roommate had one on in some picture he posted on twitter and I must have one. But not enough to pay for one. Enough to pay shipping though, if you hear what I'm saying :wink wink nudge nudge:
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I don't think he had to pay anything for his ownership. They wanted him for the move to Brooklyn.
Wikipedia says $4.5m. I think he owns somewhere around 1% of the team.
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Who do I have to give a hj to in order to get a Mad Ants Tshirt? Your roommate had one on in some picture he posted on twitter and I must have one. But not enough to pay for one. Enough to pay shipping though, if you hear what I'm saying :wink wink nudge nudge:
Give me your address and what size you want.And if we ever meet you owe me a hj.
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That phallic stuffed pizza is disgusting.
The involvement of a hot dog-ish thing doesn't necessarily make it phallic, you know.
woooow
Yeahhhh.Shit, I forget what I've told you guys about. Did I mention the day I spent with a 65 pound pot bellied pig? It was in for a "day of beauty"...sedation, hoof trimming, ear and eye cleaning, bath, etc. Yeah, apparently the large animal hospital on campus doesn't make any money, so they'll take any appointment they can get. It seems crazy with some clients spending five figures, but I suppose there's a lot of hard costs involved. And now, a random overheard conversation:Classmate: That's a cute goat!Client: Jesus made him.The goat sleeps in bed with them. I have to say, it's a nice goat. The pig lives in the house and is litterbox trained, but I don't think it gets to sleep in the owners' bed.
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I made it through the entire 3 week rotation (although I'm technically on call all weekend) without making "heyyyy goat" jokes and other references to that old Adam Sandler sketch. Mostly because I knew nobody would get it...they're all too young.

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