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I Called In Sick Today


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and after 3 days, he is risen!

If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

Pocket change cost me my first and only black girlfriend.   It was in the middle of a roaring poker boom and I was flush in ways most men don't even bother dreaming of. Money, it was like dirt to me

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Ya, I got that. I'm just saying I think an exclamation point, ellipse or question mark would be a more effective punctuation mark than a sole period. Did I mention the girl I made out with last week was a 32 year old coworker with a kid? You got an extra bed room or lean to in that shanty, Shake? Feel like I might as well just move in with you since I'm 2/3rds of the way to becoming you.Edit: She has a boyfriend of a few months as well.

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Bummer. If you delete your cookies and reload the page, it might work.The banner with the champagne bottle should still be there. I did that, too.
I was kidding! I saw it the first time. I don't even know what adblock is!
I'm not eating Metamucil and I'll be damned if I'll eat it just because Google is making it now!
I'm confused, this post has nothing to do with IOWA!!
Well, I'm always confused and I'm not even in IOWA! Actually, it's just that people in Iowa don't believe in anything. They deny evolution, global warming and are still questioning 3D TV.
I know you're not above lighting off a stick of dynamite to make sure you win the pool if the pot gets big enough."There goes a the shingle.""Oh, I think that piece of siding is going to go...""Who puts up a weather vane in a hurricane, anyways?""Hey Shake! Looks like I'm going to win! 25 seconds until 12:24 and the house is still standing. You're going to go over on time. HahahaHOLYSHITWHATWASTHAT? WHERE'D THE HOUSE GO?"
I wonder if we could put shakes house on Quibids and sell it for a huge profit and then move him to somewhere real. I was thinking of this because a group of local rich guys got drunk and are thinking of starting a similar company and raking in millions before the government shuts them all down. They wanted to know if I would let them sell some of my cars and I mean, why not? Go ahead. But I might have to do a package deal now, a car and house in bid!
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Ya, I got that. I'm just saying I think an exclamation point, ellipse or question mark would be a more effective punctuation mark than a sole period.
It was just a statement of fact thought, right.
Did I mention the girl I made out with last week was a 32 year old coworker with a kid? You got an extra bed room or lean to in that shanty, Shake? Feel like I might as well just move in with you since I'm 2/3rds of the way to becoming you.Edit: She has a boyfriend of a few months as well.
Excellent, all of it.
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Man I bet there is egg on LLY's face after another failed supersymmetry experiment at CERN failed to provide any evidence of it. I mean what the **** do you think dark matter is now, huh? It's like someone grabbing their Higgs bison and shaking it in your FACE!

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Did I mention the girl I made out with last week was a 32 year old coworker with a kid? You got an extra bed room or lean to in that shanty, Shake? Feel like I might as well just move in with you since I'm 2/3rds of the way to becoming you.Edit: She has a boyfriend of a few months as well.
what is your level of experience in roofing?italics speedz, italics.
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Fine, I'll ask.Napa, what were the circumstances surrounding you making out with a 32 year old single mom co-worker who has a boyfriend? Furthermore, is this related to the boobs you saw somewhat recently?

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Fine, I'll ask.Napa, what were the circumstances surrounding you making out with a 32 year old single mom co-worker who has a boyfriend? Furthermore, is this related to the boobs you saw somewhat recently?
Dept outing > bar with a few coworkers > different bar with fewer coworkers > us making out outside of said bar We were the last two there, and so, unless she's told somebody, which, idk, shes like bff's with our boss, nobody else at work knows, which is probably for the best. It was all her, too, I put forth less than zero effort. I just wanted to get drunk and listen to some music and make friends with the coworkers. And, no, that was a different girl, whom I don't work with. Made out a little bit with her, too, but she...she is not attractive. At least SMCW is really kind of cute and is probably in the top 5 of the company. Top 10 for sure. Although, that's not necessarily saying anything 'cause only a few hundred people work here.
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Man I bet there is egg on LLY's face after another failed supersymmetry experiment at CERN failed to provide any evidence of it. I mean what the **** do you think dark matter is now, huh? It's like someone grabbing their Higgs bison and shaking it in your FACE!
I'm going to defer all science related questions to LimbaughGod from now on. He seems on top of his game.
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Ya, I got that. I'm just saying I think an exclamation point, ellipse or question mark would be a more effective punctuation mark than a sole period. Did I mention the girl I made out with last week was a 32 year old coworker with a kid? You got an extra bed room or lean to in that shanty, Shake? Feel like I might as well just move in with you since I'm 2/3rds of the way to becoming you.Edit: She has a boyfriend of a few months as well.
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italics speedz, italics.
I don't think so.
And, no, that was a different girl, whom I don't work with. Made out a little bit with her, too, but she...she is not attractive. At least SMCW is really kind of cute and is probably in the top 5 of the company. Top 10 for sure. Although, that's not necessarily saying anything 'cause only a few hundred people work here.
I feel like that's at least saying something.You're totally revving your engines for the upcoming STUFF.
Hey speedz apparently napas new milf likes the lizard...
Heyo!
I think we can all agree this is a milf and not a cougar. Right?
I'm going to defer all science related questions to LimbaughGod from now on. He seems on top of his game.
I thought the latter was responding to the former, and liked it.
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Yesterday was my last day at work. Now officially unemployed for the first time in almost 11 years. The regional manager came over for my last day. I have no idea why. I thought she was going to be picking up my laptop, company credit card and store keys. Instead we visited a few stores, engaged in idle chit chat about what I was going to do next yada, yada, yada, then told me "Just drop off your laptop and keys at one of the stores and cut up your credit card, I don't want to bring them back on the airplane". "..."Why exactly she flew over, drove around with me for almost 300 miles to visit 4 centers and NOT pick up what she was here to pick up I don't know.On the plus side, I received a call about 6:30 PM to set up an interview on Thursday for a job with better pay and benefits. Hopefully the 17 wks of severance becomes a signing bonus.Suckers!

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I feel like that's at least saying something.You're totally revving your engines for the upcoming STUFF.
Heh...maybe, I work with a lot of old people. And I don't know if there will be a stuffin'. No idea if it was a bit of a premeditated thing on her part or just circumstances. Haven't really talked to her other than a few texts about what we were doing sat night and how we might both be out at the same bar scene (she didn't return my text when I said 'I'm at this bar etc') and I haven't bothered contacting her since and vice versa. Just letting you guys know about the upticks in my hilariously pathetic life. Have I mentioned I get in my head a lot?
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Speaking of Higgs Bison I recently sold a car to a "Higgs" and had "Bison" burgers over the weekend. Coincidence? I think not!Also, speaking of science, I can verify that in 27 years of selling cars I have never had a customer that came in on a motorcycle actually buy a car. I have theories but it's like HB, not exact science.

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