Jump to content

I Called In Sick Today


Recommended Posts

  • Replies 268k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

  • Ron_Mexico

    19413

  • speedz99

    16304

  • Napa Lite

    7767

  • ShakeZuma

    7517

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Posts

and after 3 days, he is risen!

If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

Pocket change cost me my first and only black girlfriend.   It was in the middle of a roaring poker boom and I was flush in ways most men don't even bother dreaming of. Money, it was like dirt to me

Posted Images

I reference things faster, the 'big picture' is clearer. Maybe it's a tactile issue, I don't know, but they work.Faggot.
My spatial intelligence is nearly zero, so I won't understand anything that has to do with the orientation of the cards in space and in relation to each other, and how it relates to the way the data is stored in your brain, but I can get behind the "tactile issue" thing. Also, the sturdiness might be handy. Paper bends and wilts. Notecards do not. For the record, ease of manipulation is the most important thing for me with data. If it's something I want to update or treat, I'm dumping it into a spreadsheet so I can break it down and screw it up without an eraser. Also my handwriting is embarrassingly bad.EDIT: I would never do it for something academic, like studying, as the time it takes to transfer the data to the card is time that, for me, would be more effectively spent completing pretty much any other task.
Link to post
Share on other sites
Was it LG who called that she was befriending her for that very reason? I know someone had it pretty much on the button. Also, the "Well, don't ask me to choose, then." was way, way worse than the "I love you."
With the 'encouraging' thing I was thinking of say, when a girl tries to act really cool about strippers. She wants her boyfriend to think she is fine with it (even though she really isn't) so she encourages him to go out to the strip club and maybe even claims to find strippers sexy too etc. Deep down she is uncomfortable and bitter, but she wants to be a cool, relaxed girlfriend, so she encourages the behaviour. In this situation, Jenny might feel insecure about the fact that her boyfriend has dated a chick who is arguably smarter, prettier, and more compatible with him than she is. To prove to Wang that she isn't jealous or threatened by Maggie, she befriends her and brings her up in conversations with him.
<impressed look> most impressive, ms grey.
Link to post
Share on other sites
Hey Shake, a school here locally was closed for the week because of a black widow infestation.JSC%209911%20Black%20Widow%20belly%201.JPG
got several of these lovely's in my backyard as we speak. Had more this summer than all the previous 18 summers at this house combined. Something is going on.so. damn. creepy.
Link to post
Share on other sites
Was it LG who called that she was befriending her for that very reason? I know someone had it pretty much on the button. Also, the "Well, don't ask me to choose, then." was way, way worse than the "I love you."
Yep and YEP.So Wang: you, Jenny and Maggie are walking over a bridge, when the evil troll lurking below pops out and makes scary noises. He demands female flesh for his dinner. Both girls wail "Derek help, save me". Mr Troll is getting impatient. He snaps "Derek, which of these sluts shall I devour?". He is letting you choose. Which one will you recommend to the troll?
Link to post
Share on other sites
Hey Shake, a school here locally was closed for the week because of a black widow infestation.
yeah I read about that about 2 days after I found mine. didn't help my nervousness at all.
got several of these lovely's in my backyard as we speak. Had more this summer than all the previous 18 summers at this house combined. Something is going on.so. damn. creepy.
it seems like they only come out in phases. my whole life I had maybe seen 3 total until, what was it, three years ago? when like 6 of them showed up around my house. and it wasn't just my house too because I killed 2 at work also. must be a certain type of weather pattern that helps them breed better. and this whole paragraph is not helping AT ALL to keep me convinced that the one I found was the only one. shit.maybe if I just write my thoughts out on an 8x5 index card everything will be JUST DANDY.
there, saved you some typin'
oh strategy, he already typed it!
Link to post
Share on other sites
What the fuck do you guys use notecards for? I mean, seriously, I've never used a notecard in my life. I think I tried to write a speech on them, once, but then I realized: hey, regular paper just works so much better. Index cards are just... are you guys leaving yourselves little notes? Or marking pages? You know who uses notecards? Fucking bitches.
Studying. I'm an almost completely visual learner, so after I'm done studying I can go to a test and "see" the back of the card (or my study sheet) for any given subject, whether it's just a description of some bacteria or a complex pathway for something or other.
I would never do it for something academic, like studying, as the time it takes to transfer the data to the card is time that, for me, would be more effectively spent completing pretty much any other task.
The act of writing information down, as well as choosing how to organize said information, is a big part of studying for me. Or it is now...I wasn't serious about this stuff until I started vet school, since before then I could always get away with just studying the night before a test, so when I used flashcards back then it was just as a way to quickly and easily cram simple definitions into my head for 24 hours. I also study with a whiteboard now, which is incredibly nerdy but an excellent way to learn. I'll write lists or draw pictures over and over until I could do it in my sleep.
So Wang: you, Jenny and Maggie are walking over a bridge, when the evil troll lurking below pops out and makes scary noises. He demands female flesh for his dinner. Both girls wail "Derek help, save me". Mr Troll is getting impatient. He snaps "Derek, which of these sluts shall I devour?". He is letting you choose. Which one will you recommend to the troll?
Please. As if anyone doesn't know the answer to that question.
Link to post
Share on other sites
so..... blowjobs?
Good BJ story. Friend of my wife's gets a vasectomy. After the procedure, comes home and tells the wife that the Dr. told him that she needs to blow him ( the husband) daily to "clean the pipes out" for 2 weeks. She complies.They are now divorced.
Link to post
Share on other sites
I definitely have an error in my mental process. I'm trying to figure out what it is. Alone. In my room. Eating pop-tarts and thinking about The Glory Days.The kid who gives the 2NC -- Cal -- was a buddy of mine for a while. I met him through Austin, the kid who gives the 1NC. Austin was my debate group leader at the Spartan Institute, and we stayed in touch. When I went down the East Lansing the next year, we hung out and I met his partner, Cal. Austin and I still had a kind of student/teacher relationship, but no such barrier existed between Cal and I. He came down to Ann Arbor a few times and we partied, etc. I talked to Austin after this round, and he said he thought Cal debated the best round he had ever seen, and they still lost. Seriously, if anyone's a fan of Policy Debate -- and, you know, nobody in the world is -- watch Cal's 2NC. It's probably the best ever.
I hate listening to "debates". I can't stand the breathing.
She's beautiful AND smart!
...but that name.
Wang: [incredibly frustrated, annoyed, tired] "Well don't ask me to choose, then."[silence]Wang: "I... what I meant to say was that I would never ask you to not be friends with..."[silence]Wang: "I love you."Jenny: "Did you really just say that?"Wang: "Yeah, I'm making it worse, aren't I?"[silence]Wang: "Hey, I gotta run. Maggie's on the other line."Jenny: "You have to be fucking kidding me."Wang: "Of course I'm kidding. Dinner tonight?"No dinner, but drinks in about an hour. How do you guys feel about the "back-against-the-wall, knee-jerk 'I LOVE YOU'" I just dropped in there? First time.
What's wrong with you?Also: nice save at the end.
Link to post
Share on other sites
Hey brbDoes turbo work at the Kum and Go on SE 14th/Park? There's a mentally challenged Asian that works there.
lol Kum and Go. Never knew they existed till our roadtrip to Vegas and back a few years ago. Laughed everytime.Speaking of gas. Fuck! Bought me one of dem der mid size vehicles last week. Jezus those gas tanks are large.
Link to post
Share on other sites
Wang: [incredibly frustrated, annoyed, tired] "Well don't ask me to choose, then."[silence]Wang: "I... what I meant to say was that I would never ask you to not be friends with..."[silence]Wang: "I love you."Jenny: "Did you really just say that?"Wang: "Yeah, I'm making it worse, aren't I?"[silence]Wang: "Hey, I gotta run. Maggie's on the other line."Jenny: "You have to be fucking kidding me."Wang: "Of course I'm kidding. Dinner tonight?"No dinner, but drinks in about an hour. How do you guys feel about the "back-against-the-wall, knee-jerk 'I LOVE YOU'" I just dropped in there? First time.
Ah, the path.
Scram probably uses them to practice his penmanship.
I don't know if there's a deeper meaning to this, but I still laughed heartily for some reason.There was a lot of funny stuff going on in here last night. Kudos.
Link to post
Share on other sites
Good BJ story. Friend of my wife's gets a vasectomy. After the procedure, comes home and tells the wife that the Dr. told him that she needs to blow him ( the husband) daily to "clean the pipes out" for 2 weeks. She complies.They are now divorced.
I tried something similar right after we got married....Unfortunately, after a week or so she started baking two meatloafs...one to break in the new disposal and one to eat
Link to post
Share on other sites

I am not afraid of spiders, but something changes when they are crawling on you. When I moved into my first house my dad had given me some tools and this metal work bench that he did not use. I had it out in the drive way and I was hosing it off and wiping off the cobwebs. At the end I put the hose underneath it to get the underside and there was water dripping all over my hand and arm so I didn't notice what had latched on to the back of my hand. After I thought I had sufficiently cleaned out the underside I pulled my hand back to glance down and see a black widow crawling on the back of it that was the size of a small animal.I jumped and squealed like a little girl while flailing my hand around in a flicking fashion like I had worlds biggest booger I was trying to get off without using my other hand.Cliffs notes: Black Widows aren't scary, until they are crawling on you.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Hey brvDoes turbo work at the Kum and Go on SE 14th/Park? There's a mentally challenged Asian that works there.
YEP!
Link to post
Share on other sites
wow you're a pussy.if it was me, i'd burn it all. then, i'd dare him to get mad about it. if he did get mad, i'd dump him because clearly he still has feelings. if he didn't get mad at me, i'd dump him for having no heart or sentiment. regardless of his decision, i'd immediately contact an ex boyfriend, take him out to lunch, cry about the situation just enough for him to know i was feeling vulnerable, then hint that maybe i'd sleep with him. i would not see any hypocrisy, paradox, or irrationality in any of this.
awesome, now tell Jon to log back on.
Wow, he did it.Roy Halladay pitches no-hitter in his first playoff game. (Sorry Rando.)
Ughh, oh well. There's always game 2!
No dinner, but drinks in about an hour. How do you guys feel about the "back-against-the-wall, knee-jerk 'I LOVE YOU'" I just dropped in there? First time.
It was a great recovery. I bet you wish you really had said it.
Speaking of gas. Fuck! Bought me one of dem der mid size vehicles last week. Jezus those gas tanks are large.
I thought you just got a new small gas friendly foreign model? After writing that I realized Speedz probably wishes he had one.
Link to post
Share on other sites
I thought you just got a new small gas friendly foreign model? After writing that I realized Speedz probably wishes he had one.
Nope, I got me a midsized adult foreign car that has a much bigger tank and worse gas mileage than my civic.5059813425_3f0bed799b.jpg5060429296_922303fb26.jpg5036375775_d393dee009.jpgoh and wtf?5058258571_94a6b11822.jpg
Link to post
Share on other sites
So Wang: you, Jenny and Maggie are walking over a bridge, when the evil troll lurking below pops out and makes scary noises. He demands female flesh for his dinner. Both girls wail "Derek help, save me". Mr Troll is getting impatient. He snaps "Derek, which of these sluts shall I devour?". He is letting you choose. Which one will you recommend to the troll?
Jenny tastes more like blackened salmon, whereas Maggie is a clean whitefish. I really prefer the taste of salmon, so I'd probably recommend he eats Jenny. Honestly, this question is unfair. If Maggie were replaced with one of my two best male friends, would anybody care what the results were? The right question is more like:"The troll says you can date either one of this women. Which do you choose?" Well, Jenny. Duh. Thanks troll. I'll pick to date my girlfriend. Jenny and I actually talked about it last night, and she was pretty honest. She said it really wasn't a huge deal, and I believed her, but she felt a little insecure around Maggie because Maggie is pretty, funny, smart, and interesting. And we obviously have a connection. She is worried that she and I don't have that connection. She looked like she was feeling incredibly vulnerable, so I fought off the urge to drop an L-Bomb, and did my best to reassure her that I wanted nothing but friendship out of Maggs, and nothing but sex with Jenny. I'm not sure how well it worked. We'll see. Have I mentioned how tall Jenny is? She was wearing these boots the other night, and she was taller than me. It was fucked up. She's probably between 5'10" and 5'11" flat-footed though. Our children would be able to hoop soooo good.
Link to post
Share on other sites
2 Members: Shimmering Wang, Denny CraneCatheter out yet?
only had one during the surgery but damn, I think they used one with a jagged edge. It hurt to pee for 3 days. That was new.It was glorious to move to Orlando, and the day I arrive into town, I land in the ER with a hyper infected, possibly burst appendix. Weeeeee. Well, it's out, I'm finally starting to get on the mend, yet I still have a damn belly drain. Hopefully I'll be able to start my new job Monday. I want the drain out, but I think showing up to a new job with a blood drain would show toughness and lay seeds for later down the road when I actually call in sick, they'll think I'm reallllllly sick. Anywho, I got nothing much to add, as per usual. I'm out of the loop, lost, Dolphins are aweful, etc.Caney, is Henne just another Jay Fiedler? Guy that won't win you too many games but can lose you games? Mediocre at best? Do we eventually try Thigpen? If we go Pennington, I won't watch another game this season, that much I promise. At least Thigpen is a gunslinger that can make plays with his feet if necessary. I don't know, I have never been a Henne guy. His is just so average. I think you need a playmaker at that position. Ok, I've now bored everyone to shit.
Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

Announcements


×
×
  • Create New...