I Called In Sick Today

[Naked_Cowboy 0]

I appreciate the compliment. For some reason, I feel like the "Naked Cowboy seal of approval" is reasonably rare. There's a good chance this will spur me to finish the story earlier than I otherwise would have. The only problem I envision is: if something else happens with Jo, and I feel like I have to relate that anecdote immediately, ruining parts II, III.I'm working on Part II and Part III, but Part II is kind of "Wang is a huge nerd, who understands for the first time what girls are saying when they call him 'distant' or 'intimidating,' even though he's a reasonably open, awkard goofball" and I'm worried it comes off as a brain-brag or something, when it's absolutely not. Part III is an easy write, and doesn't even depend on Part II, but my stubborn pride will not allow me to write them out of order, let alone post them that way.

While I participate in discussions far less frequently than I used to, primarily due to the relatively open workspace I reside in these days, I still read the thread for the stories. I mostly just read you, beans and a smattering of others depending on the subject matter (speedz vet school etc). Both of my jobs center around searching for weaknesses or problems. When you do that for 14-16 hours a day, it's very hard to switch to "complimentary mode", so that's probably a good read on your part. Consider this my worthless seal of approval.

[speedz99 145]

I will never know the answer to this unless I date Bo Derek.

This would be extra weird, seeing as it would be a conscious decision on your part to call a girl by her last name in bed just so you could be calling out your own name.

[speedz99 145]

Both of my jobs center around searching for weaknesses or problems. When you do that for 14-16 hours a day.

That's a lot of hours.I'm off to Foxwoods to see Russel Peters (with friends that told me he's funny...I have no clue who he is) and hopefully to not lose money playing low limit poker. Oh, and my rich friend wants to teach me to play craps, so I'm sure I'll lose a bunch of money there and be in a hole before I reach the poker room.

[Tactical Bear 3]

This would be extra weird, seeing as it would be a conscious decision on your part to call a girl by her last name in bed just so you could be calling out your own name.

When the alternative is "Bo" I think it actually makes sense. After one "Bo knows foreplay" joke, the relationship would be over anyway.

[hank213 1,823]

re gun talk: I was 10 when the younger brother of a classmate of mine found his dad's handgun in the front hall closet and accidently blew his brains out. One of those things you never forget.

That is a a damn shame and pisses me off to no end. But I don't blame the device, I blame the parent(s). I got my first bb gun when I was six, this was also the age when I first fired a handgun (.41 mag) assisted by my father. I have two very vivid memories from that time in my life. The first is of me, my father, and his father being in a little ravine high in the Rocky Mountains, we had traveled from Denver for a day of target shooting for them and a day of outdoorsy fun for me. At some point over the course of the afternoon my dad took me aside and began showing me how a gun worked, how to handle them safely, and the number one rule: always treat a gun as if it is loaded. After a 20 or 30 minute briefing on basic firearm safety he let me hold the pistol. I still remember being surprised by the weight of it. He then set up a crudely drawn bulls-eye target on a piece of styrofoam from the supermarket and asked me if I wanted to take a couple shots at it. He helped me load the pistol, all the while reminding of things like "keep the barrel pointed down range" and "don't put your finger on the trigger until you're ready to shoot." He stood behind me and helped me take aim and stay focused yet relaxed as I concentrated on my breathing finally taking a long slow breath, letting half of it out as I slowly squeezed the trigger and BOOM! I had just fired my first shot from a real gun. I can still remember seeing the dirt jump behind the target as it struck the bottom edge. It was at that moment that I fully realized just how much power that heavy little piece of black metal in my hands possessed and the seriousness of it.Many would argue that my dad was wholly irresponsible in putting that kind of power in the hands of a six year old. In fact, much later in life he confessed that was a decision he always fretted about over the years. However, by taking the mystery out of the object, teaching me the responsibility that comes with the object, and showing me the discipline of handling the object he taught me lessons which have stayed with me to this day and which I, over the course of my life, have passed on to others around firearms.The second memory is of the first time I killed something with my bb gun. It was a warm and sunny afternoon and I was in the backyard with my trusty Red Ryder carbine-action, 200-shot, range model air rifle doing a little target shoot at cans. During a pause in the action I spied a fat little meadowlark sitting on the clothesline. "Well that's a perfect target" I thought to myself. So I took aim and popped one off. Bingo! The bird dropped off the wire instantly. As I walked toward the downed prey to examine my handiwork I noticed that the bird wasn't dead, rather laying limply on the ground breathing rapidly and struggling to flap it's wings. As I stood over the creature I saw that I had hit it square in the chest. If I close my eyes I can still envision the dark red blood contrasting against it's bright yellow chest. I was struck by this creature still struggling to flee even as it was gravely wounded. I was overtaken by feelings of revulsion, regret, and remorse at inflicting harm on this creature on a mere whim. I decided I had to do the humane thing and end it's suffering so I reluctantly put the barrel up to it's head and put an end to that once happy little bird. It was then that I knew the gravity of taking a life, any life be it human or animal. From then on I knew I would never again kill anything without reason. In the years when I did do some periodic hunting I always tried to make the kills as quick and clean as possible and never considered trophy hunting. Everything I killed, I ate. I think I owe at least that to any animal I shoot.

[Naked_Cowboy 0]

That's a lot of hours.

+ a one year old and a wife. I sleep a pretty consistent 4 hours a night until the stress of it builds up too much and i get sick every few months.

[SuitedAces21 2,723]

+ a one year old and a wife. I sleep a pretty consistent 4 hours a night until the stress of it builds up too much and i get sick every few months.

that sounds healthy.

[CaneBrain 95]

That's a lot of hours.I'm off to Foxwoods to see Russel Peters (with friends that told me he's funny...I have no clue who he is) and hopefully to not lose money playing low limit poker. Oh, and my rich friend wants to teach me to play craps, so I'm sure I'll lose a bunch of money there and be in a hole before I reach the poker room.

He is hilarious if you like non-standard racial humor. Lots of stuff about Indian people and Asian people and their eccentricities. I like him.

[ajs510 122]

Leaving a loaded, unlocked handgun in a house should be grounds for a manslaughter conviction.

I agree in cases regarding children/minors, but adults can and should reasonably be expected to take responsibility for their own actions. I leave my shotgun and a handgun easily accessible to me, because it's just myself and my ex living in my house. If someone breaks in they're going to take the safe anyway. When kids are over, everything gets locked up.

[Naked_Cowboy 0]

that sounds healthy.

meh, i can deal with flu-like symptoms for a couple days a few times a year if i'm being a good provider, father, husband etc.they're adorable!

[CaneBrain 95]

I agree in cases regarding children/minors, but adults can and should reasonably be expected to take responsibility for their own actions. I leave my shotgun and a handgun easily accessible to me, because it's just myself and my ex living in my house. If someone breaks in they're going to take the safe anyway. When kids are over, everything gets locked up.

You live in a house WITH your ex AND loaded guns?I smell a tv show!

[SuitedAces21 2,723]

meh, i can deal with flu-like symptoms for a couple days a few times a year if i'm being a good provider, father, husband etc.

maybe being a good father is being alive to see your son/daughter grow up. YOU'RE KILLING YOURSELF WITH THIS LIFESTYLE.

[Tactical Bear 3]

Everyone in this picture is significantly better looking than me, including Baby Who Looks Like Don Rickles.

[Naked_Cowboy 0]

don rickles at age 1, eating cake.

[JubilantLankyLad 1,957]

I appreciate the compliment. For some reason, I feel like the "Naked Cowboy seal of approval" is reasonably rare.

It is. It's much easier to get the Naked Cowboy Rant of Vitriol, either by posting in the blog forum or by playing poker nearby or, heaven forbid, against him. They're pretty funny to read though.

I'm off to Foxwoods to see Russel Peters (with friends that told me he's funny...I have no clue who he is)

I hope you go on a strong roll of craps and get to miss his show. He's one of the painfully unfunny people that tons of others find funny. Although he is funny in that "Black people do this, but white people (they so crazy!) do this..." way, except with Indians and a strong accent. Which is to say, not at all.edit: arranged marriages are funny shit, though.

[El Guapo 8]

This would be extra weird, seeing as it would be a conscious decision on your part to call a girl by her last name in bed just so you could be calling out your own name.

I read it as instead of saying Ooohhh Derick, saying Boooo Derick.

When the alternative is "Bo" I think it actually makes sense. After one "Bo knows foreplay" joke, the relationship would be over anyway.

See above. But this makes sense too.

Gun story

Good story. I have some thoughts, prob won't remember to share them though.

+ a one year old and a wife. I sleep a pretty consistent 4 hours a night until the stress of it builds up too much and i get sick every few months.

Lots of work and very little sleep HIGH FIVE!

It's weird, you don't look like an ******* in your pictures.

[JubilantLankyLad 1,957]

It's weird, you don't look like an ******* in your pictures.

Republican?

[Poppy_Hillis 11]

maybe being a good father is being alive to see your son/daughter grow up. YOU'RE KILLING YOURSELF WITH THIS LIFESTYLE.

BUT HE ALREADY WORKS AROUND THE CLOCK!!

[SuitedAces21 2,723]

BUT HE ALREADY WORKS AROUND THE CLOCK!!

when rewatching LOST, kate's backstories are just unwatchable. i hate her so much it actually makes me angry.

[CaneBrain 95]

It's weird, you don't look like an ******* in your pictures.

He's from Texas. They look all nice on the outside which masks all the mean on the inside.That kid looks hilarious. (in a good way)Speaking of working hard, I have been on a push for the last month which means I have been billing 65-70 hours a week. I would like to thank Guap and Cowboy for making me feel better about this turn of events. Starting tomorrow we are back on a normal schedule which means 50-55. I never thought I would ever be excited to "only" work 50-55 hours per week.

[El Guapo 8]

He's from Texas. They look all nice on the outside which masks all the mean on the inside.That kid looks hilarious. (in a good way)Speaking of working hard, I have been on a push for the last month which means I have been billing 65-70 hours a week. I would like to thank Guap and Cowboy for making me feel better about this turn of events. Starting tomorrow we are back on a normal schedule which means 50-55. I never thought I would ever be excited to "only" work 50-55 hours per week.

It's 6:21 on Friday, this morning I went to CE class that let out early, so I headed to work to try and get some stuff done. I am now leaving to go home because apparently a pipe burst and flooded the garage. I will probably have to come back in Sunday, but I am going to try not to. So, ya, what could have been a short day, ended up being about an 11 hour day (not too bad actually) and I could stay here all night and not be caught up.I blame all of you.

[Naked_Cowboy 0]

It is. It's much easier to get the Naked Cowboy Rant of Vitriol, either by posting in the blog forum or by playing poker nearby or, heaven forbid, against him. They're pretty funny to read though.

Point of Order, i'm pretty much the nicest guy on earth at a poker table as there are very few things that I find more relaxing. After a few consecutive HNRs online though, i do start whipping out the "assbag"s. I'm glad it's at least entertaining.

Lots of work and very little sleep HIGH FIVE!It's weird, you don't look like an ******* in your pictures.

Look closer.

Republican?

I'm quite certain I look *exactly* like a republican. I'm practically wearing the uniform in those pictures. I'm much closer to a libertarian in disguise though.

That kid looks hilarious. (in a good way)Speaking of working hard, I have been on a push for the last month which means I have been billing 65-70 hours a week. I would like to thank Guap and Cowboy for making me feel better about this turn of events. Starting tomorrow we are back on a normal schedule which means 50-55. I never thought I would ever be excited to "only" work 50-55 hours per week.

Thank you. He is absolutely hilarious. I'm glad your work is settling down a little. I'm lucky that my second job takes place mostly on my couch. When I worked in public accounting and did the 70+ hour weeks in business clothes I could make blog forum mike look like mr. rogers.

[Poppy_Hillis 11]

when rewatching LOST, kate's backstories are just unwatchable. i hate her so much it actually makes me angry.

I've never seen Lost.

[brvheart 1,757]

I've never seen Lost.

Don't waste your time.

[LongLiveYorke 38]

Don't waste your time.

I kind of feel the same way. It was fun while it was going on, and I think most of the fun was talking to people around the proverbial water cooler and going online and discussing theories and such. Now that it's over, I think it wouldn't be nearly as interesting to watch by yourself all the way through.