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I Called In Sick Today


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If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

and after 3 days, he is risen!

Pocket change cost me my first and only black girlfriend.   It was in the middle of a roaring poker boom and I was flush in ways most men don't even bother dreaming of. Money, it was like dirt to me

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You're freakin' right there's no horrible accounts around here. Especially thanks to that worthless loser Shakezuma tuckin' his straw in between his, ummm, his ... his legs? Oh, dammit, I have no idea how that freak got around. Anyways, he's gone, no thanks to all of you and your ever-loving worship of him.

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Agreed.... I mean... MEEEEOOOWW.
OMG Hi Cheeto I've been waiting SO LONG to meet you in person and I have just SO MANY questions for instance what is your FAVOURITE colour and do you prefer meat or fish based cat food and is there any particular song which you enjoy and have you got a FAVOURITE number and did you ever want to have any kittens and IF SO what would you have named them?p.s. can I have your autograph? PLEASE
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really? i need to read back i guess.
TurboGiven what we know now, how funny is that avatar?Edit: Also interesting: check out his last visitor.2nd Edit: Of course, now that people click on that link, the last visitor will change. So...last visitor before today.3rd Edit: It was brvheart who was the last visitor. Brvheart.
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Ah yes... that was Turbo. 6532_1226444740067_1197496331_30674965_4799180_n.jpgcirca 1992.His Facebook profile. If you call him Turbo, even though he'll have no clue who you are, he'll think that you've been best friends for years. Anyone that calls him Alex... is either family, or people that don't know him. Every place that he's worked, since our McDonald's days, has put "Turbo" on his name tag. But his family didn't ever like it, and always called him Alex. I think it was last year at his birthday dinner that I heard his dad call him Turbo for the first time. It was glorious.
I agree on the awesomnicity of Turbo and I too have befriended him. The oddest thing about the whole story is that brv is like well, a huge giant.
Hey Gramps, Looks like you're gonna have a casino close real soon. Ohio casino's
I'll still go to Indy so I can smoke and play the world class poker room. Well, if the wife would ever let me.
He's probably referring to this abortion of an NFL season. I'm gonna go smoke. I'll have more to say -- about lots of stuff -- when I get back. I just casually referred to the CFO of General Motors as "Bitch Tits." In a class of 30 people. During a conversation with a guest-speaker. Who is a Global Director for General Motors.
And that is why I love TWangBear. Dog that is awesome.
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TurboGiven what we know now, how funny is that avatar?Edit: Also interesting: check out his last visitor.2nd Edit: Of course, now that people click on that link, the last visitor will change. So...last visitor before today.
That's eerie. Or is it TURBO????
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You're freakin' right there's no horrible accounts around here. Especially thanks to that worthless loser Shakezuma tuckin' his straw in between his, ummm, his ... his legs? Oh, dammit, I have no idea how that freak got around. Anyways, he's gone, no thanks to all of you and your ever-loving worship of him.
That's how Sue C's it!!
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it's quite the coincidence that wang brings up the fact that he quit making book because of a murderous felon since, JUST THIS MORNING I watched "the gang gets whacked part 2." and last night I watched the one where they think mac's dad is killing people. they both fit.

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Well I now officially really want to leave my job.Hate to do this in the middle of the Turbo talk. If we do Secret Santa and I get John I might need to send copies of the movie Breakin and Breakin'2 Electric Bugaloo.So I mentioned not too far back about the there being an issue with the cops being called nightly for some good ol ghetto domestic dispute issues. After two straight nights of the cops being called numerous letters and phone calls from tenants who were disturbed by the fighting and screaming and such.That is a quick way to get a 30 Day Notice to Quit. We put up with a lot but that stuff is squashed pretty quickly.There is only one person legally leasing that apartment, the girl. Her boyfriends mom lives here as well in another apartment. The mom was the one who referred her here and she would always call and ask me questions saying that her son and his gf were going to move here once the child was born. But when the gf came in to apply and such she said it would just be her. I kept asking about her bf but she said that he was going to live somewhere else, maybe one of our 1 bedrooms, but not with her. I didn't believe her but I have to take her word and deal with it later. She moved in and soon enough he was living there with her. At the same time the cops were investigating the guys mother because his sis was a car thief, though many believe he is too since some tenants have told me that he has a different car weekly and is always outside in the morning changing plates on the car. Anyway, all alleged. But the cops coming often to stop them from killing each other is real. Last Sunday he locked her out of the house half naked and she was screaming and yelling and another tenant called the cops. They came and he locked her out again once they left so she called the 80 year old woman who is here for emergencies and she went to let her in and he was angry and the woman felt threatened by him. He followed her back to the office in the car and was "staring" threatening at her.Anyway she was sent the notice to leave for all the reasons above.I get a phone call today from someone asking questions about the penalty for breaking a lease. At one point I ask who I am speaking with and she stated she was the person who lives in B6. So I question her about getting the 30 days notice and she said no and then hung up.10 minutes later the bf shows up and he is angry.Him: What the fuck is going on? What is this letter you sent?Me: (i never saw him before) and you are?Him: I am so and so I live in B6.Me: Umm, so and so lives in B6, there are no other tenants on that lease so I can't discuss that with you.Him: I pay the fucking rent so you will talk to me.Me: Sorry, that doesn't matter to me. The tenant on the lease is the sole person responsible for the apartment legally and that letter was sent to her so I can only discuss it with her.Him: That is fin BS. How can you do this. For what reason, (blah blah lots of anger, threats, etc that I can't remember)Me: (I just stand there and shrug)Edit: cops came, I will have to continue this later

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Last Sunday he locked her out of the house half naked.Edit: cops came, I will have to continue this later
Pics?I liked this story. I especially liked the way it ended.
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Steve, next time just put your hand on his shoulder and say, "Who are you really mad at?" Then he'll start crying and telling you all about his abusive father. Trust me, it can't fail.

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I can't remember if you have ever posted pictures of your apartments, but I am really curious to see what they look like. I have a picture in my head, and I really want to know how close I am.

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This is my boss in twenty years, an angry old tennis guy haha.
Well I now officially really want to leave my job.Hate to do this in the middle of the Turbo talk. If we do Secret Santa and I get John I might need to send copies of the movie Breakin and Breakin'2 Electric Bugaloo.So I mentioned not too far back about the there being an issue with the cops being called nightly for some good ol ghetto domestic dispute issues. After two straight nights of the cops being called numerous letters and phone calls from tenants who were disturbed by the fighting and screaming and such.That is a quick way to get a 30 Day Notice to Quit. We put up with a lot but that stuff is squashed pretty quickly.There is only one person legally leasing that apartment, the girl. Her boyfriends mom lives here as well in another apartment. The mom was the one who referred her here and she would always call and ask me questions saying that her son and his gf were going to move here once the child was born. But when the gf came in to apply and such she said it would just be her. I kept asking about her bf but she said that he was going to live somewhere else, maybe one of our 1 bedrooms, but not with her. I didn't believe her but I have to take her word and deal with it later. She moved in and soon enough he was living there with her. At the same time the cops were investigating the guys mother because his sis was a car thief, though many believe he is too since some tenants have told me that he has a different car weekly and is always outside in the morning changing plates on the car. Anyway, all alleged. But the cops coming often to stop them from killing each other is real. Last Sunday he locked her out of the house half naked and she was screaming and yelling and another tenant called the cops. They came and he locked her out again once they left so she called the 80 year old woman who is here for emergencies and she went to let her in and he was angry and the woman felt threatened by him. He followed her back to the office in the car and was "staring" threatening at her.Anyway she was sent the notice to leave for all the reasons above.I get a phone call today from someone asking questions about the penalty for breaking a lease. At one point I ask who I am speaking with and she stated she was the person who lives in B6. So I question her about getting the 30 days notice and she said no and then hung up.10 minutes later the bf shows up and he is angry.Him: What the fuck is going on? What is this letter you sent?Me: (i never saw him before) and you are?Him: I am so and so I live in B6.Me: Umm, so and so lives in B6, there are no other tenants on that lease so I can't discuss that with you.Him: I pay the fucking rent so you will talk to me.Me: Sorry, that doesn't matter to me. The tenant on the lease is the sole person responsible for the apartment legally and that letter was sent to her so I can only discuss it with her.Him: That is fin BS. How can you do this. For what reason, (blah blah lots of anger, threats, etc that I can't remember)Me: (I just stand there and shrug)Edit: cops came, I will have to continue this later
Pics?I liked this story. I especially liked the way it ended.
Steve, next time just put your hand on his shoulder and say, "Who are you really mad at?" Then he'll start crying and telling you all about his abusive father. Trust me, it can't fail.
I hope he doesn't accidentally mention brvheart's basement tenants
I'm immature.
Dog dam I have been laughing my ass off at this whole exchange.BTW, Steve, if you live I have a question about a friend who wants to break a lease because the apartment she just got is filled with psychos and the police are there every night.
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how often do you let him out of the basement?
He's free range.
The Sling Blade mention reminds me that I never finished watching that movie. I saw about half of it with my girlfriend when it first came out on DVD, but we got, you know, distracted. I have very fond memories of that movie even though I remember nothing about it.
Sling Blade is incredible. You need to watch it immediately. No joke. It's also super funny, in a Coen-like way.
I am in somewhat surprised no one has started posting under the name Turbo yet.
oops.
Hopefully you know us well enough to know that we wouldn't be making fun of him. I'm almost positive we all think that this is awesome in a totally non-ironic way.
That's the best case scenario.
TurboGiven what we know now, how funny is that avatar?Edit: Also interesting: check out his last visitor.2nd Edit: Of course, now that people click on that link, the last visitor will change. So...last visitor before today.
Yeah... we can probably avoid that 'account' altogether. That was from a long time ago. I've grown.
I'm disappointed in the fact that your grammatical fingerprint gave it away. I didn't want to know.
...
I agree on the awesomnicity of Turbo and I too have befriended him.
Turbo got home from work just now and mentioned that he had a bunch of friend requests... but he ignored everyone except Matty Katz, because you guys didn't put a note on your request, and Matt did. (In fact, I hear he even pulled out the Rex-Lax nick... well done, Matty)So you guys are going to need to re-request him if you desire to be his friend and make sure you say 'Turbo' somewhere in your note.Turbo: Round 2, later tonight...
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