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I Called In Sick Today


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I stayed away from here while I was in my "EFF WHORES" phase, but that has passed, so I will be respectful.
man, sure is a good thing I don't stay away when I'm in that phase huh. I'd have three posts.
I passed out around 7, woke up at like 2:30 and couldn't go back to sleep.
you're a strange one, mister leery.I wish I had more to say. or not. maybe I don't. allergies have been acting up a lot lately. that's pretty annoying. yeah.
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If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

and after 3 days, he is risen!

Pocket change cost me my first and only black girlfriend.   It was in the middle of a roaring poker boom and I was flush in ways most men don't even bother dreaming of. Money, it was like dirt to me

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Should be no surprise Bizzle said it better than I was going to. Oh ya, don't forget about Scott Norwood and wide right.
Or the Music City Miracle.
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I cant believe I scrounged out a W against a fantasy team with Drew ****ing Bress on it. Thank you Philip Rivers for waking up out of your coma in the 4th quarter.

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Go right ahead and fuck yourself.
That's just misdirected anger that is meant for Chris Chambers. You might want to check his pulse before you start him again.Dick.
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I accidentally took Randy's advice.
Man, I hate it when that happens.
I currently am scared of the fact that my girlfriend likes me more than I like her.
You have what George Costanza always wanted. So I guess it's a good thing that you're scared of that.Did anybody see the WSOP episode where Jason Alexander and Raymer were prominently featured? Alexander started talking about Seinfeld and his favorite George line (which was the "is that not allowed?" bit when his boss is talking to him after nailing the cleaning lady). I liked that he could talk about it happily. I hate it when these celebrities are way more famous for one particular role than anything else they've ever done and they are indignant about it and wil never talk about it because they want to talk about the serious off-Broadway play they did that nobody ever saw.
I know what's up with women.
Haha.
brontosaurus.png
They're still brontosauruses to me. Apatosaurus? I don't think so.
me: y-ya do?
Awesome.Edit: Because speedz probably doesn't read every thread...
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I found out last night my wife's cousin is being deployed, not sure where. He just graduated from flight school, top of his class with honors and he is now and F-18 Hornet pilot. I really need to figure out how to finagle a fly along.

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I found out last night my wife's cousin is being deployed, not sure where. He just graduated from flight school, top of his class with honors and he is now and F-18 Hornet pilot. I really need to figure out how to finagle a fly along.
at first I thought you said deported and were about to go off on Obama or something
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death panels
Hey mk, not to go all Jeepster on you or anything, but you mentioned in the healthcare thread that Obama's plan was a good one and one of the reasons you stated was because if you like your current plan, you can keep it.So there was some discussion on that issue and I posted the exact passage in the bill that looks to me like, no, you really can't keep it even though that's what they've been saying.Now, I understand why you wouldn't want to go back to that part of the forum because there are so many sucky people, but I am (hopefully) respectfully asking your opinion on the matter.I can post the passage again if you'd like.Edit:erin.jpgstella_artois.jpg051026_soxwin_hmed_9p.h2.jpg
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It could be. If I get off twice, I'm not concerned at all with duration.
...
speedz: I'm gonna pop off my shirt. blast my nips.
I do say that quite often. I love Artemis.
Edit: Because speedz probably doesn't read every thread...
Thank you. That cat is awesome.I think I might be fostering kittens again soon...this time I'll be able to post pictures, since I can now get them from my phone. I know at least 3 of you are excited about that.
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I took a huge shit this morning...after which I made a quick wipe-check and was fairly suprised to see that it was bright green. I paused for a second to make sure I wasn't dreaming, finished wiping, and stood up to survey the damage. It was surreal...all three midsized logs were neon green, kind of like hypercolor shirts if they came in shit form. I went back up to class, knowing that it'd be a bit tricky to google "green feces" without anyone around me taking notice, and remembered just as I walked though the door that I had eaten a spinach-artichoke dip yesterday afternoon. I'm pretty sure that my system was so surprised by the intake of a vegetable-like substance that it freaked out and ejected the invader.

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I took a huge shit this morning...after which I made a quick wipe-check and was fairly suprised to see that it was bright green. I paused for a second to make sure I wasn't dreaming, finished wiping, and stood up to survey the damage. It was surreal...all three midsized logs were neon green, kind of like hypercolor shirts if they came in shit form. I went back up to class, knowing that it'd be a bit tricky to google "green feces" without anyone around me taking notice, and remembered just as I walked though the door that I had eaten a spinach-artichoke dip yesterday afternoon. I'm pretty sure that my system was so surprised by the intake of a vegetable-like substance that it freaked out and ejected the invader.
How did it smell?
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I took a huge shit this morning...after which I made a quick wipe-check and was fairly suprised to see that it was bright green. I paused for a second to make sure I wasn't dreaming, finished wiping, and stood up to survey the damage. It was surreal...all three midsized logs were neon green, kind of like hypercolor shirts if they came in shit form. I went back up to class, knowing that it'd be a bit tricky to google "green feces" without anyone around me taking notice, and remembered just as I walked though the door that I had eaten a spinach-artichoke dip yesterday afternoon. I'm pretty sure that my system was so surprised by the intake of a vegetable-like substance that it freaked out and ejected the invader.
Too much iron can do that, too. You see it in the poo of formula fed babies all the time.
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Fatty.
You of all people should have recognized that line for what it was. One of my favorites of all time...from back before the show started to suck (so at least ten years ago, probably more).
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You of all people should have recognized that line for what it was. One of my favorites of all time...from back before the show started to suck (so at least ten years ago, probably more).
Dammit.Honestly, it sounded familiar when I read it, but apparently not familiar enough to consider it.It's a good thing I stopped scoring posts in here last week.
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Dammit.Honestly, it sounded familiar when I read it, but apparently not familiar enough to consider it.It's a good thing I stopped scoring posts in here last week.
That's really too bad, as I planned on purchasing some stimulants and going on a Sick Thread rampage over the next 10 days. Oh well. I guess I'll just go hang out with my friend Deng Xio Pig instead.DengXiaoPig.jpg
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That's really too bad, as I planned on purchasing some stimulants and going on a Sick Thread rampage over the next 10 days. Oh well. I guess I'll just go hang out with my friend Deng Xio Pig instead.DengXiaoPig.jpg
Go rampage in off topic.Also: awesome.
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