I Called In Sick Today

[Nikki_N 17]

I would ask where one could get more of this sugar free cherry lime-aid because it sounds DELICIOUS.also, here's a question for everybody: why is over freaking half of the news stories on every god damn major news site in video form? is it that hard to write an article? is it that hard for the general public to read one? I fucking hate that. pisses me off every time. "oh hey! that sounds like an interesting story! wonder what it's about? OH. great. a fucking video. no thank you 30 seconds of load time, then some ridiculous commercial, then putting ear phones in, then waiting until the god damn end to figure out what the damn story is about."perturbed.

I totally agree. I would much rather read an article. Besides, I have a slow computer that makes it nigh impossible to watch streaming video, anyway.Oh, and you can get the sugar-free cherry limeaid at Wal-Mart. It's by the Crystal Light. I don't really like Crystal Light, but I like most of the generic wal-mart brand stuff.

[Sal Paradise 57]

hard to believe that girls aren't just throwing vag at you, really.

FUCK 'EM.

I agree with you and Mexico's commentary on you. Interesting.

scary thing when that happens I'd imagine.

[SuitedAces21 2,723]

FUCK 'EM.

i would, but well, you know.

[Sal Paradise 57]

i would, but well, you know.

yeah, chloroform ain't cheap, that's for sure.

[Nikki_N 17]

this is a thread full of guys. The thought to wash it never entered into any of our minds. We drink out of the jug, always. And I'm not even "that guy", I mean, I always but the seat down, refill the toilet paper and always pick up all my clothes and shoes. Hell, I don't have to pick them up because I never toss them around. Plus, I like laundry and vacuuming, but yeah, drinking out of the container, not an issue

Is this the case when you live with other people?

yeah, chloroform ain't cheap, that's for sure.

VNH

[SuitedAces21 2,723]

yeah, chloroform ain't cheap, that's for sure.

oh sal, you rascal you.i'm trying to think of something interesting to say, but well, you know. i'm really looking forward to Transformers 2 and Public Enemies. so i got that going for me.

[vbnautilus 48]

also, here's a question for everybody: why is over freaking half of the news stories on every god damn major news site in video form? is it that hard to write an article? is it that hard for the general public to read one? I fucking hate that. pisses me off every time. "oh hey! that sounds like an interesting story! wonder what it's about? OH. great. a fucking video. no thank you 30 seconds of load time, then some ridiculous commercial, then putting ear phones in, then waiting until the god damn end to figure out what the damn story is about."

This is really annoying. There are times when I see that little video icon and instead of clicking the link I do a Google News search on the headline to get a regular version of the story.

[renaedawn 1]

I've wanted to post, but I've had even less to add than usual, I think.

Truth be known, this is more accurate than what I said about being ignored.Loved seeing the cartoon again, Beansey. That's so awesome. I think I stared at it grinning stupidly for around 45 seconds. No exaggeration. Scout's honor.

[El Guapo 8]

I think part of what Wang says is true, nobody is going to go bonkers if there is an overly amusing story. It really takes something like, i don't know, a internet thread helping to break up a relationship via a phonographic gift to get everyone's juices flowing.Also, there are a large number of people who lurk this thread anonymously. I got a number of PM's and IM's from other FCPers about my mom, that read about it in here. I did not post it anywhere else. Even Cane and VB chimed in recently.I still think, there is an intimidation factor for new posters coming in here. It's not exactly an open invitation. Not that that is a bad thing, but most people are not just going to jump into an ongoing conversation that has been going on for 3+ years, with people who know each other. It's kind of like butting in.Of course there are people like me and brvheart, who don't care and butt in anyway. Both of could have easily stopped posting after our first few posts in this thread were met with angst. Now I annoy all of you with woes of my family, set mex up with no sex jokes, and ask Beans how to fix ridiculous shit, which reminds me, I have to replace another garbage disposal tonight. It somehow got a screw logged in it and destroyed the inside. But hey, now I know how to do it.MK is going to send me some shaman directions on how to heal my mother.Wang helps me with my grammar.Sal makes me feel better about myself.Strat annoys me with IM's on stock picks.Ou..JLL - helps fix my computer and excel spreadsheets and sends me links to some lovely ladies on occasion.Everyone has their place.

[renaedawn 1]

I adopted the cat. I need help thinking of names...right now there's only one possibility.Coworker: She's very cute.Speedz: Yeah, I think she looks like a little cheetah.Coworker: Cheeto?Speedz: Cheetah.So "Cheeto" is the only name in the running for now. She does kind of look like a cheeto.Yeah, it looked funny when I typed it, but it's really what he said.

Name her Juneau.

You're right. This thread is dying. I have actually spent a considerable amount of time thinking about it, and I'm pretty sure I know why. I mean, it's a lot of things, but more than anything:We know each other too well, anymore. Each one of us has heard every validation and criticism from every regular poster so many times that it's not new or exciting or, in many cases, worth offering anymore. I'm as good an example as anyone. You guys know what my stories are going to be like, because they're all the same. The circumstances change, but I've got a handful of foibles that, no matter where the story begins, lead me down the same road to the same tragicomic destination. By the same token, you've seen me flip out and get fired up about the same stupid shit -- Flushgarden is a humorless faggot, etc. -- so many times that you wouldn't blink (nor be expected to) if I did it one more time. It's all the same. That's the thing. It's all the same. I imagine our situation is analgous to being in a longterm relationship. No matter how exciting and interesting it is at first, there comes a time... the excitement fades; it becomes routine. We know each other too well, anymore. We know what's coming, and there's no reason to expect it to change. Sure, there's value in knowing what everyone's up to. I am following Speedz's racist stripper shaman roommates stories quite closely, but in the past there would have been a two-week back-and-forth during which we told each other how awesome he was, and made jokes, and thought of funny situations for the future. But we've done that. Shake's not going to tell me I'm funny. I'm not going to make sure Speedz is aware how fascinated I am. At some point, when comfort replaces the desire to impress and be accepted, people just stop trying. I dunno, I've been kinda busy lately, too, though, so I could be wrong.Wang

Maybe we should have a threesome?

[renaedawn 1]

So I just went to refill my cup of Sugar-Free Cherry Limeade and I finished off the pitcher. Normally I just make more right away. This time, the spout was dripping and instinctually, I licked it, to keep the red stuff from dripping on the floor. I said out loud, to no one, because I'm the only one home (besides the dog who was in the other room), "Great. Now I have to wash that." So, what would you do? Would you wash it? Or would you just make more sugar-free cherry limeade and put the pitcher back in the fridge? Or would you put the empty and saliva spouted pitcher in the fridge?

I'd totally just make more without washing it. You're the only one drinking it anyway. It's your saliva.

[Ron_Mexico 4,219]

Oh, and you can get the sugar-free cherry limeaid at Wal-Mart. It's by the Crystal Light. I don't really like Crystal Light, but I like most of the generic wal-mart brand stuff.

Wal-Mart? He'd spend $87 in gas just to buy $4 worth of Crystal Light

Is this the case when you live with other people?

Yeah, eff em. If it's a wife or g/f or whatever, they put their mouth on my piss pump, so what's the difference. If it's your kid, he lived in your vag for a 9 months, eff him. If it's a roommate, eff em, just don't do it in front of em. Oh, and pray that they don't do it if they have the herpIt's great when you flop the nuts with QJ on a K910 flop, flat the bet, then another king comes on the turn. You raise, he jams, you know you're beat but have to call in case he's playing AK or KQ, then realize he isn't. K9. Sigh, nothing like getting stacked when you're closing all your tables. Especially when it's one of the few playing a full buy in. Everyone else plays $10. I still don't get that.Oh, I have a stalker that checks up on me. I told him about my QQ laydown tonight and he told me he already read about it.Hi Buffalo021

[Tactical Bear 3]

it will always be my internet home

Yeah, me too. I never imagined myself as the kind of guy who, you know, effing posts on a piece of stuff internet forum, but: sure enough, here I am. I have never posted on a forum anywhere else, and I don't imagine I will. If I stopped posting here, it won't be because I got a better offer.

Yeah, this is all pretty true. Although I do still want to impress.

Again: yeah, me too. I just don't offer as much validation as I used to, and I don't try as hard to impress, since I feel like everyone's opinion of me is pretty well cemented (and accurate). I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING.

I haven't been funny in over a year, so I'll have to take some of the blame. plus, I haven't gotten laid in a long, long time, so there's none of that reporting to do either (you know, since I'd screw it up somehow).

You know, I think I am going to change my answer to this. You really haven't been as funny since you stopped being Shake. It's like changing accounts sapped you of your powers. I'll make you a deal: you start being funny/awesome (and/or go back to Shake), and I will acknowledge and praise you each and every time. Can you tell me why you are no longer Shake? I am curious. Not "Voldemort loses his job and when I learn about how/why, I think 'serves you right!' for like a half-second before I feel really guilty about that, because, come on, who lets his girlfriend open his mail?" curious, but curious nonetheless. I like you a lot more than most people around here, despite the waning of your awesome, so, come on, let Uncle Wang in on the secret.

also, here's a question for everybody: why is over freaking half of the news stories on every god damn major news site in video form? is it that hard to write an article? is it that hard for the general public to read one? I ****ing hate that. pisses me off every time. "oh hey! that sounds like an interesting story! wonder what it's about? OH. great. a ****ing video. no thank you 30 seconds of load time, then some ridiculous commercial, then putting ear phones in, then waiting until the god damn end to figure out what the damn story is about."perturbed.

I also feel this way. I never, ever watch the video, and when I click on a link with an interesting title that ends up being a link to a video story, I get all pissed and then think "why the fuck am I so mad? What is wrong with me?"

yeah, chloroform ain't cheap, that's for sure.

You know, I wish I were better with the snappy one-liner. Perhaps, in the future, instead of starting sentences with phrases like: "Perhaps, in the future, instead..." I will spend an entire week "trimming the fat" from my posts, and only offering quick, to the point, biting commentary.Perhaps there will be wacky results.

[Tactical Bear 3]

I think part of what Wang says is true, nobody is going to go bonkers if there is an overly amusing story. It really takes something like, i don't know, a internet thread helping to break up a relationship via a phonographic gift to get everyone's juices flowing.Also, there are a large number of people who lurk this thread anonymously. I got a number of PM's and IM's from other FCPers about my mom, that read about it in here. I did not post it anywhere else. Even Cane and VB chimed in recently.I still think, there is an intimidation factor for new posters coming in here. It's not exactly an open invitation. Not that that is a bad thing, but most people are not just going to jump into an ongoing conversation that has been going on for 3+ years, with people who know each other. It's kind of like butting in.Of course there are people like me and brvheart, who don't care and butt in anyway. Both of could have easily stopped posting after our first few posts in this thread were met with angst. Now I annoy all of you with woes of my family, set mex up with no sex jokes, and ask Beans how to fix ridiculous shit, which reminds me, I have to replace another garbage disposal tonight. It somehow got a screw logged in it and destroyed the inside. But hey, now I know how to do it.MK is going to send me some shaman directions on how to heal my mother.Wang helps me with my grammar.Sal makes me feel better about myself.Strat annoys me with IM's on stock picks.Ou..JLL - helps fix my computer and excel spreadsheets and sends me links to some lovely ladies on occasion.Everyone has their place.

I think you mean: "everyone has his place." You see, the word "everyone" is singular, despite its reference to more than one person. My place is especially cemented.

[Tactical Bear 3]

Is this the case when you live with other people?

I drink out of the container, and even when I'm drinking out of a container from which I and I alone will drink, I feel guilt. Yet I do it, and have no intention of changing the practice. I drink from the container for the same reason I roll my window down with the AC on and I never make my bed.

[El Guapo 8]

I think you mean: "everyone has his place." You see, the word "everyone" is singular, despite its reference to more than one person. My place is especially cemented.

You are slipping. Spell check changed pornographic, to phonographic and you missed it.Threads over.

[Bizzle 0]

It's great when you flop the nuts with QJ on a K910 flop, flat the bet, then another king comes on the turn. You raise, he jams, you know you're beat but have to call in case he's playing AK or KQ, then realize he isn't. K9. Sigh, nothing like getting stacked when you're closing all your tables. Especially when it's one of the few playing a full buy in. Everyone else plays $10. I still don't get that.

Short-stacking became popular because people who were playing tourneys realized that cash game players horribly horribly suck at identifying shoving and reshoving ranges, so they could make some serious cash (especially at the nosebleeds) by exploiting that. Not quite sure why people do it at 50 NL-seems kinda ridiculous considering that most of them probably couldn't identify the same ranges, either.I would look for the deeper stacked tables Mexy-I believe they have a higher minimum buy-in limit, if you're looking to avoid it.Finally, nice laydown on the QQ hand-I always try to avoid folding queens pre online because, you know, people suck, so I definitely appreciate it when it happens.

[Tactical Bear 3]

You are slipping. Spell check changed pornographic, to phonographic and you missed it.Threads over.

I don't even have spell check active on my laptop. You have no idea how terrifying it is for me every single time I click the "Add Reply" button. I would really love to figure out how to manipulate the settings on this board...

[Napa_Don 688]

I was just checking the dates on this country music festival I'm going to in August and I noticed that Kellie Pickler is going to be there (as well as T Swift). SUCK ON THAT SAL.

[El Guapo 8]

I don't even have spell check active on my laptop. You have no idea how terrifying it is for me every single time I click the "Add Reply" button. I would really love to figure out how to manipulate the settings on this board...

Just use fire fox, it puts the red squiggly line under the misspelled words.I only put one g in squiggly first time around and the amazing computer told me.Now only if it had grammar check...

[Ron_Mexico 4,219]

You know, I wish I were better with the snappy one-liner. Perhaps, in the future, instead of starting sentences with phrases like: "Perhaps, in the future, instead..." I will spend an entire week "trimming the fat" from my posts, and only offering quick, to the point, biting commentary.Perhaps there will be wacky results.

prick tease

Short-stacking became popular because people who were playing tourneys realized that cash game players horribly horribly suck at identifying shoving and reshoving ranges, so they could make some serious cash (especially at the nosebleeds) by exploiting that. Not quite sure why people do it at 50 NL-seems kinda ridiculous considering that most of them probably couldn't identify the same ranges, either.I would look for the deeper stacked tables Mexy-I believe they have a higher minimum buy-in limit, if you're looking to avoid it.Finally, nice laydown on the QQ hand-I always try to avoid folding queens pre online because, you know, people suck, so I definitely appreciate it when it happens.

Yeah, I figured it was for the instajam, double and run. Seems to be the case. I have a comfortable amount of money for 50NL, but any higher and I'm pushing it. The 100nl game is a lot more aggressive. I tried to avoid swingy play and think the 50NL players can be exploited. They'll stack off more frequently with top pair. I like that. I play ultra loose pre flop, which does cost me sometimes.Thx for the compliment, it actually chubbed me up in the pants, because the rest of me is already chubbed up, but it seemed so standard that I didn't even request time. Oh well, I do seem to know when I'm beat deep in my gut, so maybe that's a positive sign that I'm not a total donk, except that I still call most times

[Nikki_N 17]

I drink out of the container, and even when I'm drinking out of a container from which I and I alone will drink, I feel guilt. Yet I do it, and have no intention of changing the practice. I drink from the container for the same reason I roll my window down with the AC on and I never make my bed.

Oh, that's just wrong.

I don't even have spell check active on my laptop. You have no idea how terrifying it is for me every single time I click the "Add Reply" button. I would really love to figure out how to manipulate the settings on this board...

Firefox has spellcheck.

[El Guapo 8]

Another I hate my industry sometimes rant:Met with a super nice couple this afternoon. Early sixties, retired, family people. The kind of people you would love to have as parents.They are retired teachers, and have accumulated and inherited quite some wealth. Net worth is somewhere in the neighborhood of 7-8 Million, mostly in property, but about 2 Million in investable assets.This asshole up the street from us, 6 months ago tied up 1.8 million in Variable Annuities with 8-9 year surrender periods with 8-9% surrender charges. What that means is, if they wanted to take out more than 10% in one year they would pay a minimum 8% penalty. To make things worse, they took non qualified money (non IRA dollars), about 650K worth and put in one of these, and then set that up to take out 35K a year to pay for a life insurance policy for estate tax purposes. They are in the highest tax bracket, so they are paying close to 40% taxes on that 35K a year they are pulling out of the Annuity. Where is if some was left liquid or in cash, then it would not be taxed at all. Besides all of that, the annuity is in the name of the trust instead of individually held, which cancels out the death benefit, since trusts don't die.I calculated out what this asshole made on these people. $98,627. For a few hours of work.Now I am going to do 10X the work, possibly not get compensated, or if we do it will be much much less than what it should have been. The thing that sucks the worst, is these people would have been ideal clients and they would be nice/easy to work with.Next meeting, I get to tell them how screwed they were, and possibly get them to hire a securities lawyer to go after this guy.90% of their fucking asset locked up for 8+ years. This is one day after we find out some highly regarded firm out of the bay area has been lying to their clients and putting half of their assets in Managed Futures or CTA's (Commodity Traded Assets) MK knows how volatile those are. These are retiree's that are betting the farm, literally, on half of their retirement.It's no wonder why people don't trust us.

[vbnautilus 48]

Another I hate my industry sometimes rant:Met with a super nice couple this afternoon. Early sixties, retired, family people. The kind of people you would love to have as parents.They are retired teachers, and have accumulated and inherited quite some wealth. Net worth is somewhere in the neighborhood of 7-8 Million, mostly in property, but about 2 Million in investable assets.This asshole up the street from us, 6 months ago tied up 1.8 million in Variable Annuities with 8-9 year surrender periods with 8-9% surrender charges. What that means is, if they wanted to take out more than 10% in one year they would pay a minimum 8% penalty. To make things worse, they took non qualified money (non IRA dollars), about 650K worth and put in one of these, and then set that up to take out 35K a year to pay for a life insurance policy for estate tax purposes. They are in the highest tax bracket, so they are paying close to 40% taxes on that 35K a year they are pulling out of the Annuity. Where is if some was left liquid or in cash, then it would not be taxed at all. Besides all of that, the annuity is in the name of the trust instead of individually held, which cancels out the death benefit, since trusts don't die.I calculated out what this asshole made on these people. $98,627. For a few hours of work.Now I am going to do 10X the work, possibly not get compensated, or if we do it will be much much less than what it should have been. The thing that sucks the worst, is these people would have been ideal clients and they would be nice/easy to work with.Next meeting, I get to tell them how screwed they were, and possibly get them to hire a securities lawyer to go after this guy.90% of their fucking asset locked up for 8+ years. This is one day after we find out some highly regarded firm out of the bay area has been lying to their clients and putting half of their assets in Managed Futures or CTA's (Commodity Traded Assets) MK knows how volatile those are. These are retiree's that are betting the farm, literally, on half of their retirement.It's no wonder why people don't trust us.

given that I have no idea what you just said I would be extremely vulnerable to being taken advantage of in the very same way, except that I dont have 8 million dollars.

[El Guapo 8]

given that I have no idea what you just said I would be extremely vulnerable to being taken advantage of in the very same way, except that I dont have 8 million dollars.

Then why am I wasting all this time talking to you?