JSHamm 9 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 On my men's soccer team this year (a combined 1-15 the last two years, thank you very much) we added a bunch of old guys that weren't very good. One of them was this guy Dave, and only one of our coaches had ever met him before. He scored a goal in our first game, and we thought he was pretty good, but it soon became apparent that he sucked. Sucking is okay, because we suck, but he would do this self-talking thing whenever he fucked up, which was often. "Oh, DAVE, what are you DOING?""COME ON, Dave!""Let's go DAVE. LET'S GO!"On a tennis court, I think it might make a little more sense since its mano-y-mano-, and only one person is on one side of the court (sans doubles), but on a soccer field with 21 other guys, we got this jackass who isn't very good constantly yelling his own name every time he fucks up a pass or makes a bad decision. Which was often.He'll probably be invited back next year. I can't wait.I played high school tennis as well and was paired up for doubles. While serving, I hit my partner in the back of the head three times in a row. He already hated me anyway so after the third time he dropped his raquet and charged me. Now, mind you, he was rather large and pudgy so I didn't exactly feel like being pounced on. Interestingly, he stopped half way to me and stared me down for a second before turning around and walking back into position. I started laughing at the absurdity of the anti-climatic nature of the moment and in turn the other team started laughing. I laughed harder and my partner proceeded to walk off the court thereby forfeiting our match. Link to post Share on other sites
lvpro 0 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 Hey Logan,Guess what? Bloc Party on Sunday. You in the car yet?Ohhhh. That sounds fun.Sadly, I'm not in the car. Or boarding a plane. I'll more than likely be watching the Seahawks game alone, as all of my friends that I would generally watch football with are going to the game this week.Yeah right. Like the guy in the $4,000 suit is gonna watch football alone. COME ON!I'll actually very likely just be wearing a $25 hoodie and some cheap jeans, but that's not nearly as impressive. Link to post Share on other sites
JSHamm 9 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 4 User(s) are reading this topic (2 Guests and 0 Anonymous Users)2 Members: JSHamm, Lolliglad you're awake. Link to post Share on other sites
Lolli 0 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 4 User(s) are reading this topic (2 Guests and 0 Anonymous Users)2 Members: JSHamm, Lolliglad you're awake.Not for long. Link to post Share on other sites
KDawgCometh 2 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 No, actually, I think it was a much, much older episode. Keith? Do you know which season during which it aired? (<--- ugh... stop writing like that, Derek)WangI don't remember which season it was exactly, but I know it was somewhere in the 5-9 range. I lost my simpson's episode books when my basement flooded several weeks ago, so I can't say for sure. It was titled duffless IIRC Link to post Share on other sites
Ouch-8s 4 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 Not for long.that was a hell of a pop-in! Link to post Share on other sites
mrdannyg 274 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 I don't remember which season it was exactly, but I know it was somewhere in the 5-9 range. I lost my simpson's episode books when my basement flooded several weeks ago, so I can't say for sure. It was titled duffless IIRCi think it was earlier than that. possibly season 3 or 4. i vividly remember crappy animation. i'm actually watching all of seasons 4-9 right now. i know people say the show started to suck in the last few years, but the drop off started way before that. even seasons 9 and 10 are noticeably worse than 4 and 5. i think its around mid-4 that it gets amazing for a few seasons. Link to post Share on other sites
renaedawn 1 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 I have decided I do not like ranch dressing.No, I am not wrong. All you ranch heads have no tastebuds.Shut up and go back to whacking off. Link to post Share on other sites
Ouch-8s 4 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 I have decided I do not like ranch dressing.No, I am not wrong. All you ranch heads have no tastebuds.Shut up and go back to whacking off.I was going to debate this with you but you made a hell of a closing argument, so, bye! Link to post Share on other sites
SBriand 4 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 I have decided I do not like ranch dressing.No, I am not wrong. All you ranch heads have no tastebuds.Shut up and go back to whacking off.I am fine if you decide that Ranch is no good. But the real question is, what has replaced Ranch on your salad/chicken/vajayjay? Link to post Share on other sites
Randy Reed 0 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 Erin Andrews was "a huge nerd in high school" and "used to wear her Larry Bird backpack to school".It is my destiny to marry her.No pics? WTF?I well, I literally had a blast catching up, well not all the way up but it's closing time. Awesome jobs everyone. Tons of eval! Link to post Share on other sites
lvpro 0 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 I am fine if you decide that Ranch is no good. But the real question is, what has replaced Ranch on your salad/chicken/vajayjay?My money is on A1 Bold n' Spicy. Link to post Share on other sites
renaedawn 1 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 I am fine if you decide that Ranch is no good. But the real question is, what has replaced Ranch on your salad/chicken/vajayjay?honey mustard/bbq/Victoria's Secret Red Link to post Share on other sites
silkyjonson 1 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 Dinosaur Jr? COME ON!What you mean you did'nt like the idea of golfing all around New York??? Link to post Share on other sites
silkyjonson 1 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 I played high school tennis as well and was paired up for doubles. While serving, I hit my partner in the back of the head three times in a row. He already hated me anyway so after the third time he dropped his raquet and charged me. Now, mind you, he was rather large and pudgy so I didn't exactly feel like being pounced on. Interestingly, he stopped half way to me and stared me down for a second before turning around and walking back into position. I started laughing at the absurdity of the anti-climatic nature of the moment and in turn the other team started laughing. I laughed harder and my partner proceeded to walk off the court thereby forfeiting our match.Was'nt that a scene from school for scoundrels? Link to post Share on other sites
gobears 0 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 Another high school tennis player here until my senior year when I and my pals switched to the more manly sport of...badminton.So, I and my partner were 2nd doubles on the team as we could never win two in a row against the first team to take their spot. However, we peaked during the section finals which was a double elimination tournament involving all teams in the division. We lost one match early but then proceeded to go on a tear smashing opponent after opponent. In the semis, we faced - yes - the number one team from our own school. Retribution was at hand..It was a close match and we went into the deciding set which went down to the wire. At set point, I fired the bird into the top of the net which ticked the net, hung in mid air for an eternity and then dropped barely over the side of the net giving us the win. Onto the finals where we met the team that had given us our only loss in the tournament. Well this team we faced had a 300lb player and a very athletic looking player. However, it was role reversal as the huge guy could do magic with the bird whenever he got his racquet on it while the athletic guy was actually extremely clumsy and played like a statue. So we fired every shot at that guy basically trying to hit him with the shuttlecock at every opportunity - the sweep was ours and we were hoisted upon the shoulders of our teammates victorious!Well, since most of the badminton team were girls as it was a co-ed team, we settled for many hugs and no hoisting. Link to post Share on other sites
silkyjonson 1 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 shuttlecockhahahhahha Link to post Share on other sites
Ouch-8s 4 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 Well, since most of the badminton team were girls as it was a co-ed team, we settled for many hugs and no hoisting.hahaha, very nice! Link to post Share on other sites
RhinestoneCowboy 2 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 Andre the shuttlecock ninja. Awesome. Link to post Share on other sites
Theraflu 1,035 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 Dan Lebatard is a faggot. Link to post Share on other sites
ShakeZuma 585 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 Yeah, I know. I don't have the heart to really stay worked up when I'm directing my fuhrer (<--- new idea: when the rage is directed at a Jew, the word is no longer "furor," but instead "fuhrer") at someone who I don't really dislike.I'd like to point out this is another undesirable side effect of being sober. I could get irrationally rageified and stay that way for a months if I were still drinking. I think if I make it to a full year, I'm going to pull a Homer Simpson and get wasted.Wangyou know, I don't really think that is part of the recovery from alcoholism. I could be wrong though.No no no, THAT part just HAS to be made up. No way a place with that name exists.oh but it does! it is known to have the highest tides in the world! wonderful! (no, I didn't have to look that up. I've known that since I was like 8 for some reason. and no, I'm not clay aiken. just really gay.) Link to post Share on other sites
Napa_Don 688 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 Well, since most of the badminton team were girls as it was a co-ed team, we settled for many hugs and no hoisting.I have prelims for badminton intramurals on tuesday night. I'm terrible at badminton, but I figure if I can get put into the D league I might be able to muster some victorys and maybe when an intramural tshirt which, quite literally, make girls come up to you and say, 'I want to have sex with you but you have to wear your intramural champion tshirt', yeah, they're that powerful. Link to post Share on other sites
strategy 4 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 Let it be known that I took LG to both Hobby Lobby AND Michael's. I also farted while standing in line and blamed the smell on an elderly woman behind us.How strange is it that we all played tennis in high school? And let me guess, you all had really nice forehands and no backhand, too... Link to post Share on other sites
silkyjonson 1 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 I have prelims for badminton intramurals on tuesday night. I'm terrible at badminton, but I figure if I can get put into the D league I might be able to muster some victorys and maybe when an intramural tshirt which, quite literally, make girls come up to you and say, 'I want to have sex with you but you have to wear your intramural champion tshirt', yeah, they're that powerful.I dont usually fuss about typo's but you do know you wrote girls here right? Link to post Share on other sites
Ouch-8s 4 Posted September 21, 2007 Share Posted September 21, 2007 How strange is it that we all played tennis in high school? And let me guess, you all had really nice forehands and no backhand, too...Yeah I played tennis. Still do occasionally. I had no problems with my backhand though.Everyone needs to see this: Ahhaaaa! Link to post Share on other sites
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