I Called In Sick Today

[kers2 0]

Shake ZulaThe old schoolaThe mic rulaDid you make it Zuma on purpose, Andrew?

Yes I made it Zuma to be differentabsolutely not because I didn't google it first before making the name and am now slightly embarrassed that I spelled it wrong

Oh wow. This reminded me of when you were a hot new poster and I was apparently jealous of all the attention you were getting so I made fun of you about Zula/Zuma a lotThe internet... its serious business!I had a lot of stuff quoted but then my browser froze up from clicking the cat pictures thread, so I lost it all and I'm too much of a lazy dildo to go back. Lets try and remember1) Sorry Lori :sad face:2) I really hate not being able to log on to FCP at work, but it is definitely for the better of my career. I've taken a liking to Wikipedia for breaks though.2) That's all I got. I started to e-val everything I could remember then realized I wasnt funny

[Dirtydutch 8]

No shit. If I decide I want a bowl of cereal, I go to the corner store and buy one of those overpriced pints (half pints if they have them) containers of single-use milk, because what if you buy a gallon and decide to put a case of beer (ugh, I don't drink anymore) Diet Mountain Dew in the fridge and you don't have space because this giant jug of milk is taking up all the space? Then it goes bad, and you can't help but think that's a depressing metaphor about the choices you've made in life and you don't even have a sweet, sweet Diet Mountain Dew to make you feel better?I'm going to play a little Warcraft II, just to feel closer to you, JeffStrat.Wang

I drink so much milk now that it's not a problem. If anyone were to elect to attack milk like they're doing with tobacco, the first ad could be me shirtless with a milk mustache. It would kinda' torpedo the whole "does a body good" concept

[Shimmering Wang 1]

I drink so much milk now that it's not a problem. If anyone were to elect to attack milk like they're doing with tobacco, the first ad could be me shirtless with a milk mustache. It would kinda' torpedo the whole "does a body good" concept

Milk: It's like fatty water.

[speedz99 145]

Not sure. I initially had (Wang makes "YOINK!" noise) but figured it was funnier if left up to the imagination. It could be a lot of thinks. But it has to be in all caps, and be followed with an exclamation point.YOINK!ZOINK!SWOOSH!ERRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!GROK! (This one might be kinda funny, but only if you've read "Stranger in a Strange Land" and even then it makes zero sense)

We both know what you should have gone with.SNAY!

[Shimmering Wang 1]

We both know what you should have gone with.SNAY!

Man, I usually get almost every joke, but I must have missed something. (waving hand over head, in order to indicate that some other object- in this case, the reference/joke- has gone "over my head") I'd fake it so as not to seem dorky, but that's too far beyond me.

[speedz99 145]

Man, I usually get almost every joke, but I must have missed something. (waving hand over head, in order to indicate that some other object- in this case, the reference/joke- has gone "over my head") I'd fake it so as not to seem dorky, but that's too far beyond me.

So you're saying that you and your brother are really different people? Cause I'm pretty sure he was the one I was talking about snay with. By he I mean you. Or he...I'm not sure.

[MightyLouse 0]

So you're saying that you and your brother are really different people? Cause I'm pretty sure he was the one I was talking about snay with. By he I mean you. Or he...I'm not sure.

I see I am still a topic of conversation even after D-Rock's return. Nice to know. As far as I know we aren't the same person but I've been told we have a lot in common. Plenty of genes at least. He's downstairs playing "Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic 2" right now. I'm not sure how insulted to be that you think we are the same person. My gut says very very insulted. Do any of you guys play poker? I was playing with a friend a while back and I got made fun of for this hand.No limit, blinds are a quarter and fifty. Most people have like 40 or 50 bucks on table and it's early on. I'm in the big blind with 6 other players.Loose player opens to 4 first to act. He likes to raise a lot and plays the same from every position. He always raises to 4 or 6. 3 players call. Most are decent, and know that the opener is dumb and loose, so will call with a wide range. Only one player is what I would consider tough money. We get the best of it every time we play.I look down at AhKh. I look at the 16 dollars in the pot. I have something like 45 dollars in front of me. I move in. Does that seem right to you?

[MightyLouse 0]

PS- I get to go to the casino on Saturday. I've only been once and did okay at the crazy 3/6 game. I'm gonna sit down and play some NL though because it's probably my better game. Any tips for my first casino No Limit experience?

[rocketpoker828 0]

I look down at AhKh. I look at the 16 dollars in the pot. I have something like 45 dollars in front of me. I move in. Does that seem right to you?

Yeah, seems right to me.As for the casino question, bring enough cash for a few buyins, play tight but call with speculative hands (pps, suited connectors) because you'll get paid if you hit.

[strategy 4]

Does that seem right to you?

I think it's a fold.

[MightyLouse 0]

Yeah, seems right to me.As for the casino question, bring enough cash for a few buyins, play tight but call with speculative hands (pps, suited connectors) because you'll get paid if you hit.

It is a 100 max game so I'll probably borrow 400 or so from my brother and work out some kind of arrangement. If you read this in the morning, Derek, can I borrow like 400 bucks? Halvsies? I usually play a pretty taggy preflop style, but have played in enough really loose games to play a lot of hands in late position. D-Rock told me the standard raise at a 1-2 100 game is to 10 or 15. Is that true?

I think it's a fold.

That would be poor for my table image. Plus I had a few drinks and folding was hard.

[rocketpoker828 0]

I usually play a pretty taggy preflop style, but have played in enough really loose games to play a lot of hands in late position. D-Rock told me the standard raise at a 1-2 100 game is to 10 or 15. Is that true?

Yeah, I'd say 10-15 is standard.

[strategy 4]

That would be poor for my table image. Plus I had a few drinks and folding was hard.

I was mostly kidding. It's a push, every time. You pretty much summed up why when you asked the question.

[Theraflu 1,035]

D-Rock told me the standard raise at a 1-2 100 game is to 10 or 15. Is that true?

Yes. Every table is different, but generally anywhere from 8-20 depending on the players and their chip sizes. On my first hand of a 1/2 table a few weeks ago a guy opened UTG for 75. Apparently he was tilting from the hand before, but I'd just sat down and was pretty confused. I was even confused when UTG+2 flat called, and then they checked it down with an ace on the flop and flipped over 8-8 and 9-9. Just got in from Vegas, went pretty poorly. I managed to only play poker once, it was a 68 person $70 tourney, and I got 6th for a $140 cash. Most of my time was spent fluctuating with blackjack. I was even up about a grand in blackjack at one point. But I was also consuming over 20 alcoholic drinks a day, and gave it all away, plus a good amount more. I now have very-little-to-no money, didn't play the one game I was good at, didn't see any shows, spent a silly amount of money on food, and didn't cheat on my girlfriend in any way whatsoever. Also, my credit card got declined today, and I'm not sure why, since I only used it once on the whole trip. I wish I wasn't such a degenerate. Good to see Wang and Randy are back? What's the deal?Sorry Lori, that's terrible news.

[CardWarfare 4]

Why wasn't this posted in reply to one of CDub's "See what I did there?" posts?I feel like an opportunity was missed.

I mentioned that in the Hideout a few days ago when I saw that picture originally. It really would've been a great moment. Oh, the things that could've been...

Fanfuckingtastic.

Who does God pray to?

I was going to ask this same thing when I read it originally, but I didn't want to just randomly post it without first checking to see if people had posted it earlier.I mean, only a moron would do that.

I was bored and reading the Hideout since I had never been in there and I was curious why it was stickied when I hardly ever see new posts there that often. I found this gem about the Army thread in it...

Yeah, the place used to be a lot busier, and Theresa stickied it a while back. Probably because we all cried like little girls. Don't get me wrong, I still post there, and greatly enjoy the fact that I'm the big cheese, but now it doesn't really pick up until after 10 or 11 pm. The whole open-door policy over there kind of makes the thread have it's ups and downs. I don't want to start an army-esque exclusion thing over there, and since I'm really the only one in there who is an asshole to people that deserve it, it goes through dry spells. I do enjoy the people there now though, dereeekho, socal_j, ricker, napa, dogpatch.. all good guys.

[MightyLouse 0]

I was mostly kidding. It's a push, every time. You pretty much summed up why when you asked the question.

I know this. I'm stupid but not really stupid. Wait, no, I take that back. That sentence is clear evidence that I am really really stupid. I meant that as in "actually really stupid." I might be really stupid, but I'm not really really stupid. God dammit. I thought it was a pretty easy all-in but a few of my friends were making fun of me for overpushing. I just wanted to be sure.

[rocketpoker828 0]

I thought it was a pretty easy all-in but a few of my friends were making fun of me for overpushing. I just wanted to be sure.

I made a similar move with AK in a home game last week. Blinds were 40/80, three people limped, and I (in the BB) shoved. Everyone was like WTF?I made the same move with JJ and got called with Q5.

[CardWarfare 4]

I made a similar move with AK in a home game last week. Blinds were 40/80, three people limped, and I (in the BB) shoved. Everyone was like WTF?I made the same move with JJ and got called with Q5.

Did it with two queens in my home game tonight. Got called by K8.I was leaving shortly after.

[strategy 4]

Why are there no mellow drunk girls out there?

I thought it was a pretty easy all-in but a few of my friends were making fun of me for overpushing. I just wanted to be sure.

Yeah, you're fine. The play might even be +EV with no overlay, but the $16 in the middle from all the people playing against the loose opener's range makes it too good of a deal to pass up.

[Shimmering Wang 1]

I talked to him about it before he went to bed, and it turned into a pretty lengthy conversation about No Limit strategy in general. I came to the ultra depressing conclusion that he's a better NL player than me, or will be very shortly. I'd probably have better results than him if we played right now, but he'd simply get so much beter so much faster. He thinks about NL a lot better than I do, and stands to be a pretty good player someday. I recently found out he's been hanging out at other poker forums for a while, working on the game. He's had good results online, but he takes it more seriously than he lets on.I own him headsup though. It's like olderbrother strength. Also, he's a faggot. Wang

[ricker 0]

]The whole open-door policy over there kind of makes the thread have it's ups and downs. I don't want to start an army-esque exclusion thing over there, and since I'm really the only one in there who is an asshole to people that deserve it, it goes through dry spells. I do enjoy the people there now though, dereeekho, socal_j, ricker, napa, dogpatch.. all good guys.

I'm an asshole when the situation calls for it....

[leftygolfer 7]

Just got in from Vegas, went pretty poorly. I managed to only play poker once, it was a 68 person $70 tourney, and I got 6th for a $140 cash.

Where? More poker content. This is poker forum.

I own him headsup though. It's like olderbrother strength. Also, he's a faggot. Wang

LOLI have 3 younger bros. One was a fag like Ron and played fball in college ( D3/ 3 national championships) and is bigger than me. I can kick his ass.Olderbrother strength is a super power. Much like the man of steel.

[IQCrash 1]

Friday nights + copious amounts of alcohol + motel rooms are funGoodnight.

[JoeyJoJo 18]

Friday nights + copious amounts of alcohol + motel rooms are funGood night.

FYP

[IQCrash 1]

FYP