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I Called In Sick Today


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and after 3 days, he is risen!

If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

Pocket change cost me my first and only black girlfriend.   It was in the middle of a roaring poker boom and I was flush in ways most men don't even bother dreaming of. Money, it was like dirt to me

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My 6 year old son has been begging for a mowhawk, so I finally gave in yesterday. Adam taught me how to post pictures, so if this doesn't work, blame him.th_mowhawk.jpg
Over-under on the first time he gets arrested?
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My 6 year old son has been begging for a mowhawk, so I finally gave in yesterday. Adam taught me how to post pictures, so if this doesn't work, blame him.th_mowhawk.jpg
He looks like he wants to kick my ass, and probably could. j/k, he looks very cool with the mohawk. Sadly for you, he's going to want to keep it for school now...lol.
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Cause I'm retarded...and no, that's not me in the background, I'm the one taking the pic.Watch your tongue, mister, my sister ain't slutty. And no, that is my niece.
She sucked a kid off on a swing set at age 14. Yeah, St Luke's Cathedral is looking for a nun, should I have them give her a ring?
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My 6 year old son has been begging for a mowhawk, so I finally gave in yesterday. Adam taught me how to post pictures, so if this doesn't work, blame him.th_mowhawk.jpgEdit: I guess you can't see it too well.
That's a pretty sweet haircut. Why don't you post a pic of your cans so we can stop (start) beating around the bush?
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That was a joke, big guy. She's totally Miss Innocent. Swear to Dog.
so I've been jerking off to a lie for a month? Broccoli.You owe me a lewd picture to replace that memory.Not sure the neice is gonna cut it.edit: Nope, I just tried, she didn't work.
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PLO83 way pot, I bet light on the flop and turn in 2nd position.The river gives me the nut low and no good shot at the high.BB checks, I check, Button bets 1/2 pot, BB pots it...Do I call with nut low? Is this a spot where I'm obviously quartered and shouldn't bother considering the fact that I have very little invested and now it's a big amount back to me?
Yes, fold.
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My real motivation for learning how to post pictures was to post more and better pictures of my boobs, despite what I may claim to the contrary.
A noble goal
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Last night I was told by Royal and Keith (both in defense of Royal) that I was desperate and/or "dying for" attention. To be fair, this is after I finally flipped on on Royal and wrote like 800 words about how I don't like him. (I called him, among other things, a narcissistic masturbating peacock, which I regret. Slightly.) It's been brewing for a while. For some reason that guy just reminds me of some misguided Big Man on Campus type clown. 1) Duh. Sure I like it when people tell me they like the stuff I write. It's one of the reasons I put it here. Good observation, Royal, though I'd argue "desperate" and "dying for" are a little much. I'm just a Golden Lab that likes getting scratched behind the ears.2) Royal Tour has a fan club...3) I'd say # of posts is a pretty decent measure of how much one wants to call attention to oneself. That's pretty much what making a post is. "Hey. Here. I got something to say." Let's compare, shall we?Shimmering Wang- 7.4 posts/dayRoyal Tour- 14.8 posts/dayBased on the above data, I'd say my hypothesis that Royal and Keith are being at least slightly hypocritical for acussing me of being an attention-hound cannot be denied. I'd also further speculate that it's pretty sweet and awesome that Royal Tour has exactly TWICE as many posts/day than me to a single decimal place. I am a scientist.Now that I've got that out of the way, what're you cats up to the rest of this beautiful day?Wang

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BIZZLE JUST WON A MAIN EVENT SEAT ON STARSNo lemon juice this time either.
Heyooooo!!!111 Congrats Biz, that is so Hobbes.
And just for the record. I look great today. Got my dark navy blue pistripe suit back from the cleaner, pink Polo shirt, nice gray and pink Geoffrey Beene tie, Bruno Magli black shoes with a buckle. Seriously. I look good.
Fully erect.
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Last night I was told by Royal and Keith (both in defense of Royal) that I was desperate and/or "dying for" attention. To be fair, this is after I finally flipped on on Royal and wrote like 800 words about how I don't like him. (I called him, among other things, a narcissistic masturbating peacock, which I regret. Slightly.) It's been brewing for a while. For some reason that guy just reminds me of some misguided Big Man on Campus type clown. 1) Duh. Sure I like it when people tell me they like the stuff I write. It's one of the reasons I put it here. Good observation, Royal, though I'd argue "desperate" and "dying for" are a little much. I'm just a Golden Lab that likes getting scratched behind the ears.2) Royal Tour has a fan club...3) I'd say # of posts is a pretty decent measure of how much one wants to call attention to oneself. That's pretty much what making a post is. "Hey. Here. I got something to say." Let's compare, shall we?Shimmering Wang- 7.4 posts/dayRoyal Tour- 14.8 posts/dayBased on the above data, I'd say my hypothesis that Royal and Keith are being at least slightly hypocritical for acussing me of being an attention-hound cannot be denied. I'd also further speculate that it's pretty sweet and awesome that Royal Tour has exactly TWICE as many posts/day than me to a single decimal place. I am a scientist.Now that I've got that out of the way, what're you cats up to the rest of this beautiful day?Wang
Well you've got our attention now, happY?SLUT
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Shimmering Wang- 7.4 posts/dayRoyal Tour- 14.8 posts/day
posts per day about Shimmering WangShimmering Wang 7.4Royal Tour 3.7posts per day about Ron's pretty mouthShimmering Wang 0 Royal Tour 11.1
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posts per day about Shimmering WangShimmering Wang 7.4Royal Tour 3.7posts per day about Ron's pretty mouthShimmering Wang 0 Royal Tour 11.1
Cashews are expensive.WangEDIT- Make it 7.3, beyotch.
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Cashews are expensive.WangEDIT- Make it 7.3, beyotch.
i count that as a post about you as wellagain I could care less if you make 100 posts a day about yourself that's fine with me - just admit that he was right who knows in 1000 years people might be looking at those posts as more important that Wyld Stallion songs
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Now that I've got that out of the way, what're you cats up to the rest of this beautiful day?
I'm kind of disappointed that you feel the need to defend yourself here.Pretty much everyone here is an admitted attention whore (except Lori, who makes me laugh every time she denies it).Anyways, I've been disappointed in Royal lately. Definitely has not been showing me the funny. Mitch, I know you're reading this. Don't worry, I'm still in like with you...just not love anymore.
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Last night I was told by Royal and Keith (both in defense of Royal) that I was desperate and/or "dying for" attention. To be fair, this is after I finally flipped on on Royal and wrote like 800 words about how I don't like him. (I called him, among other things, a narcissistic masturbating peacock, which I regret. Slightly.) It's been brewing for a while. For some reason that guy just reminds me of some misguided Big Man on Campus type clown. 1) Duh. Sure I like it when people tell me they like the stuff I write. It's one of the reasons I put it here. Good observation, Royal, though I'd argue "desperate" and "dying for" are a little much. I'm just a Golden Lab that likes getting scratched behind the ears.2) Royal Tour has a fan club...3) I'd say # of posts is a pretty decent measure of how much one wants to call attention to oneself. That's pretty much what making a post is. "Hey. Here. I got something to say." Let's compare, shall we?Shimmering Wang- 7.4 posts/dayRoyal Tour- 14.8 posts/dayBased on the above data, I'd say my hypothesis that Royal and Keith are being at least slightly hypocritical for acussing me of being an attention-hound cannot be denied. I'd also further speculate that it's pretty sweet and awesome that Royal Tour has exactly TWICE as many posts/day than me to a single decimal place. I am a scientist.Now that I've got that out of the way, what're you cats up to the rest of this beautiful day?Wang
I dropped this yesterday, You were already proven to go off like a jackass after i said 1 sentence about you being jealous of kevin smith.You cant handle a couple quick jabs? you resort to a full out name calling attack, and then continue to b1tch about it the next day in a different thread. What were u trying to gain here with this post?yes, I have a fan club. No i didnt not start it.Yes i post alot, and Yes i did place in the design contest and had an all inclusive trip to Vegas, and Yes the majority of my posts were because of that and all that came with it.I find it odd that you went about dealing with a couple quick jabs in this way.You built yourself up in the general forum, posting stories, events, ideas. Most of which are thread starters.I'm not sure what the intention was, I mean people do enjoy them, I never once knocked you for posting them. But Is it wrong for me to assume you do it to gain feedback on wether or not these stories are funny?Much like a comedian running through his act, you should learn to take offence or rather "a light witty jab" with a slice of dignity. You managed to come off as a fool now quoting and commenting on my posts and my name as a member here. I've had numerous PM's from several trolls, But you never hear about it.Grow up man.i'm not threatened by your place here
I'm kind of disappointed that you feel the need to defend yourself here.Pretty much everyone here is an admitted attention whore (except Lori, who makes me laugh every time she denies it).Anyways, I've been disappointed in Royal lately. Definitely has not been showing me the funny. Mitch, I know you're reading this. Don't worry, I'm still in like with you...just not love anymore.
Thats fine, Mexico understands, I'm not into keeping up withthe forums as much, just a lot of stuff going on and i barely play much poker now. Work has taken over, and other life issues.sorry u feel that way brother, You guys are still all my number 1 e-buds
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